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How to give a female an orgasm. Mastering the Art of Female Orgasm: Expert Tips and Techniques

How can you set the mood for an unforgettable intimate experience. What are the most effective techniques for clitoral stimulation. How do you ensure a satisfying vaginal orgasm. What role do communication and toys play in enhancing pleasure. Which positions are best for G-spot stimulation. How can you overcome common obstacles to female orgasm. What are the key differences between clitoral and vaginal orgasms.

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Setting the Stage: Creating the Perfect Atmosphere for Pleasure

The journey to a mind-blowing orgasm begins long before any physical contact. For many women, mental and emotional preparation is crucial. Here’s how you can create an environment conducive to pleasure:

  • Dim the lights to create a soft, romantic ambiance
  • Light scented candles or incense for a sensory experience
  • Put on some sensual music to set the mood
  • Slip into something that makes you feel sexy and confident
  • Start with a relaxing massage to ease tension and build anticipation

Why is setting the mood so important? Women typically require more time to build arousal compared to men. By engaging multiple senses and creating a relaxing atmosphere, you’re helping your partner transition from daily stresses to a state of sensual receptivity.

The Clitoral Orgasm: Unlocking Intense Pleasure

For many women, clitoral stimulation is the key to reaching orgasm. But how can you ensure you’re providing the right kind of touch?

Communication is Key

Every woman is unique in her preferences. The most effective way to please your partner is to ask what she likes. Don’t be afraid to pose simple questions during intimacy:

  • “Do you prefer circular motions or up-and-down strokes?”
  • “Is this pressure good, or would you like it softer/harder?”
  • “How does this feel?”

Remember, the clitoris is incredibly sensitive. Some women may prefer indirect stimulation rather than direct touch. By maintaining open communication, you can discover what works best for your partner.

Exploring the Full Clitoral Structure

Many people are unaware that the clitoris extends far beyond the visible nub. How can you stimulate the entire clitoral structure?

  • Cup your hand over the entire vulva, including the labia
  • Apply gentle pressure and try pulsing or grinding motions
  • Use a vibrating toy along the length of the labia to stimulate internal clitoral tissue

By engaging the full clitoral structure, you can potentially unlock new levels of pleasure for your partner.

Oral Sex: A Gateway to Ecstasy

Oral sex can be an incredibly effective way to bring a woman to orgasm. Here are some expert tips to enhance your oral technique:

  1. Start with gentle kisses and licks around the inner thighs to build anticipation
  2. Use the flat of your tongue against the vulva, moving your head in a “no” motion
  3. Combine oral stimulation with manual touch, using your thumb to stimulate the clitoris while your mouth explores lower
  4. Experiment with different pressures, speeds, and intensities
  5. Pay attention to your partner’s hip movements and match their rhythm
  6. Make eye contact to increase intimacy and gauge reactions
  7. Express your enthusiasm verbally – many women find it arousing to know their partner is enjoying giving pleasure

Remember, every woman is different. Some may prefer gentle, consistent stimulation, while others might enjoy more intense or varied sensations. Always be attentive to your partner’s responses and adjust accordingly.

Harnessing the Power of Sex Toys

Incorporating sex toys into your intimate encounters can significantly enhance pleasure and increase the likelihood of orgasm. But how can you introduce toys in a way that feels natural and exciting?

Let Your Partner Take the Lead

If your partner already uses toys, ask her to show you how she likes to use them. This can be an incredibly intimate and educational experience. Pay attention to:

  • The types of toys she prefers (vibrators, suction toys, dildos, etc.)
  • Where she likes to use them (clitoris, vaginal opening, internally)
  • The intensity and patterns she enjoys

Once you’ve observed her technique, you can offer to take over, following her lead and adding your own variations.

Exploring New Sensations

There’s a wide world of sex toys available, each offering unique sensations. Some popular options include:

  • Traditional vibrators for external or internal stimulation
  • Suction toys that use air pulses to stimulate the clitoris
  • G-spot stimulators designed to target internal erogenous zones
  • Dual stimulation toys that engage both the clitoris and G-spot simultaneously

When introducing new toys, start slow and communicate openly about what feels good. Remember, toys are meant to enhance pleasure, not replace human connection.

The Vaginal Orgasm: Exploring Internal Pleasure

While clitoral orgasms are more common, many women can also experience intense pleasure from vaginal stimulation. How can you increase the chances of a vaginal orgasm?

Finding the G-spot

The G-spot is an area of sensitive tissue located about 2-3 inches inside the vagina on the front wall. To stimulate it:

  • Insert one or two fingers into the vagina, curving them towards the front wall
  • Use a “come hither” motion to stroke the area
  • Apply firm, consistent pressure

Remember, the G-spot swells when aroused, so it may be easier to locate after some initial stimulation.

Positions for G-spot Stimulation

Certain sexual positions can make it easier to target the G-spot during penetration. Some effective options include:

  • Doggy style, which allows for deep penetration and direct G-spot contact
  • Cowgirl (woman on top), which gives her control over the angle and depth of penetration
  • Modified missionary, with a pillow under her hips to elevate the pelvis

Experiment with these positions and variations to find what works best for you and your partner.

Overcoming Obstacles to Orgasm

Despite best efforts, some women may struggle to reach orgasm. What are some common barriers, and how can they be addressed?

Stress and Anxiety

Mental state plays a crucial role in sexual response. Stress, anxiety, and self-consciousness can all interfere with arousal and orgasm. To combat this:

  • Practice relaxation techniques like deep breathing or meditation before intimacy
  • Focus on sensations rather than “performance”
  • Create a judgment-free zone where both partners feel safe to express themselves

Medication Side Effects

Certain medications, particularly antidepressants, can impact libido and orgasmic function. If you suspect medication may be interfering with sexual pleasure:

  • Consult with a healthcare provider about potential alternatives or adjustments
  • Explore non-pharmaceutical approaches to managing underlying conditions
  • Be patient and understanding, focusing on intimacy and connection beyond orgasm

Lack of Foreplay

Rushing into penetration without adequate arousal can make orgasm difficult or impossible for many women. To ensure proper arousal:

  • Engage in extended foreplay, including kissing, touching, and oral sex
  • Pay attention to non-genital erogenous zones like the neck, ears, and inner thighs
  • Use lubricant to enhance comfort and sensitivity

The Importance of Aftercare

The moments following orgasm can be just as important as the build-up. How can you ensure a positive post-orgasmic experience?

Physical Comfort

After intense sexual activity, many women appreciate:

  • Gentle cuddling or skin-to-skin contact
  • A soft blanket or robe to prevent post-orgasm chills
  • A glass of water to rehydrate

Emotional Connection

Orgasm releases bonding hormones like oxytocin. To reinforce emotional intimacy:

  • Express appreciation and affection for your partner
  • Share your favorite moments from the encounter
  • Discuss any new discoveries or preferences for future exploration

By prioritizing aftercare, you create a positive association with sexual experiences, potentially enhancing future encounters.

Embracing Sexual Diversity

It’s crucial to remember that every woman’s sexual response is unique. What works for one person may not work for another. How can you celebrate this diversity in your sexual relationships?

Open Communication

Foster an environment where both partners feel comfortable discussing their desires, boundaries, and experiences. This might include:

  • Regular check-ins about sexual satisfaction
  • Sharing fantasies or new things you’d like to try
  • Being receptive to feedback without judgment

Exploration and Experimentation

Approach your sexual journey with a spirit of curiosity and playfulness. This could involve:

  • Trying new positions or techniques
  • Exploring different types of touch and stimulation
  • Incorporating elements of role-play or fantasy

Remember, the goal is mutual pleasure and connection, not achieving a specific type of orgasm or meeting an arbitrary standard.

By embracing these principles and techniques, you can create a rich, satisfying sexual experience that honors your partner’s unique needs and desires. Remember, the journey to pleasure is just as important as the destination.

How to Make a Woman Orgasm: Advice From Sex Therapists

  • Set the mood by dimming the lights, giving each other massages to relax, or lighting candles.
  • To give someone a clitoral orgasm, be sure to stimulate the entire area and ask your partner what they like.
  • To give someone a vaginal orgasm, try positions like doggy style and cowgirl to stimulate the G-spot.

Making someone with a vulva orgasm can be tricky. While 95% of heterosexual men report that they always or usually orgasm from sex, only 65% of heterosexual women say the same. 

Furthermore, it’s estimated that just about 18% of women say penetration alone is enough to have an orgasm, and that about 37% of women need clitoral stimulation to have an orgasm. 

Needless to say, people with vulvas need some extra TLC and special attention to erogenous zones in order to become fully aroused, feel pleasure, and ultimately, have an orgasm.  

Here are some sex therapist approved tips for giving someone with a vulva an orgasm.

Set the mood

Before diving right into sexual activity, it can help to set the mood. Compared to people with penises, vulva owners tend to need more time to build arousal, says Sari Cooper, LCSW, certified sex therapist and founder and director of the Center for Love and Sex. 

You can set the mood by tapping into your partners’ senses, depending on their personal preferences. For example, Cooper says you may try:

  • Having you and/or your partner slip into something sexy
  • Dimming the lights in a romantic way
  • Lighting candles or incense for pleasurable scents
  • Giving each other erotic massages to relax the body 

These are steps you can take to not only help your partner get turned on, but also to help them relax, which is essential for having a great orgasm. As always, communication is key. Listen carefully to what your partner says so that you can cultivate an environment and experience that’s sexy to them.

How to give someone a clitoral orgasm

Clitoral stimulation is key for many people with vulvas. Here are four tips for giving someone a clitoral orgasm. 

1. Ask your partner what they like

The clitoris is very nerve-dense and incredibly sensitive, says Jordan Rullo, PhD, certified sex therapist with women’s health app Flo. 

Due to its sensitivity, some people may prefer indirect clitoral stimulation instead of direct stimulation. 

Everyone’s different, so communicating with your partner and asking them what they like can save you some trouble and result in more pleasure for them.

 “If they don’t know, try circular rubbing on the clitoris and near the clitoris, all along asking your partner how it feels or using their non-verbal cues to guide your movements,” says Rullo.

If you aren’t getting a lot of obvious signs that your partner is feeling good, you can ask one-word easy questions to keep the vibe going, Cooper says. For example, she says you can ask: 

  • More?
  • Circles?
  • Strokes?
  • Softer?

2. Stimulate the entire clitoris

The clitoris is more than just the external pea-sized bump at the top of the vaginal lips — there are also the bulbs of the clitoris, comprised of erectile tissue, which can actually be stimulated through the labia, says Jessica O’Reilly, PhD, sexologist and host of the @SexWithDrJess Podcast. 

To do this, O’Reilly says you can cup your hand around their lips, resting your hand on the pelvic mound, and then pulse, rub, or grind in this area. Or, you can use a vibrating toy across the entire length of the lips. 

3. Give oral sex

For many people, oral sex can be a surefire path to pleasure and orgasm, says O’Reilly. When giving oral sex, O’Reilly recommends trying out these tips:

  • Lick around the thighs first to build anticipation
  • Stick your tongue out and press it against their lips, moving your head slowly back and forth like you’re shaking your head “no”
  • Use your thumb to rub the clitoris while using your mouth lower on the vagina
  • Experiment with different pressure and intensities
  • Follow the rhythm of their hips
  • Look up at them and make eye contact
  • Tell them how much you love going down on them 

4.

Use sex toys

Incorporating sex toys in the bedroom is a great way to bring some new excitement into sex as well as increase likelihood of orgasm. 

Cooper says you can ask your partner to show you how they like to use toys themselves so you get to learn what they like, and from there, you can follow their lead or add in some of your own moves. 

Typical vibrators are great, or your partner may prefer a newer type of toy that creates suction and uses air for different types of sensations.

Best sex toys

Alyssa Powell/Business Insider

If you are looking to incorporate toys in the bedroom but aren’t sure where to start, check out our guide to the best sex toys.

  • Best vibrator for couples involving females: We-Vibe Tango X – See at We-Vibe
  • Best budget vibrator: Vibe – See at Maude
  •  Best butt plug: Anal Training Kit & Education Set – See at B-Vibe

How to give someone a vaginal orgasm

When people talk about vaginal orgasms, they’re typically referring to G-spot orgasms. The G-spot is an erogenous zone that’s about two inches deep into the vagina, on its front wall. It’s believed that G-spot orgasms occur because it’s actually the internal parts of the clitoris being stimulated. Here are four tips for giving someone this type of orgasm.

1. Be sure they’re warmed up

If someone’s going to have a vaginal orgasm, it’s more likely to occur if they’ve had a clitoral orgasm first, Cooper says. So, you may want to use the above tips for clitoral orgasm before moving internally. Additionally, O’Reilly suggests only going for G-spot stimulation once someone is highly aroused to make the experience more comfortable and pleasurable in general.

2. Use your fingers

To stimulate the G-spot manually, insert a finger and feel for a sponge-like area, and then do a “come hither” motion with your finger to stimulate the area, starting off slowly and then eventually going faster and using more pressure, says Rullo. 

Additionally, you can add another finger if your partner would like. Be sure to follow along with verbal and non-verbal cues to see what feels good for them, and don’t hesitate to ask for feedback so you know what they really want. 

3. Find the right positions

If you move on to penetrative sex, whether with a penis or a strap-on, Cooper says to aim for positions that make the G-spot easier to access. You can also try positions that put your partner in control, so that they can angle themselves to be hitting their G-spot and control the depth and intensity. A few positions great for G-spot orgasms are:

  • Missionary (place a pillow or wedge under their hips to get a better angle)
  • Doggy style
  • Cowgirl 

4. Use sex toys

There are plenty of sex toys to choose from that are meant for the G-spot. Additionally, Cooper says you can opt for toys such as rabbit vibrators which will stimulate both the G-spot and the clitoris, which gives your partner the opportunity for a blended orgasm, and an increased chance at giving them an orgasm in general.

Insider’s takeaway

These tips are a great place to start if you’re looking to pleasure your partner with a vulva, but don’t forget to learn what your partner specifically likes so you have the best chance of pleasing them and giving them an orgasm. “Everybody is different, so communicate with your partners to find out what they like and keep an open mind. Explore for pleasure rather than touching to create one specific outcome,” says O’Reilly.

Ashley Laderer

Ashley Laderer is a freelance writer from New York who specializes in health and wellness. Follow her on Twitter @ashladerer

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How to Give A Woman an Orgasm – Promescent

How Female Arousal Works | Tips to Make Her Orgasm | Pro Tips for Better Orgasms | Takeaways

You’re looking to please your female partner during sex, so you Google: “how to make a girl orgasm.

Congratulations—you’ve just stepped into a rabbit hole of female orgasm information.

Some of what you read on other blogs may be the truth, but much of what you stumble across will be fiction.

It’s really no wonder guys are bumbling and fumbling in the bedroom, trying desperately to get it right and just having no luck.

In fact, studies have shown that only six percent of women always have an orgasm during sex, and the numbers have seemed to be on a decline since 1999.

Blame it on an overload of internet information, blame it on pornography, or blame it on what you will.

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Fact is, if you really want to know how to give her an orgasm, you have to get your ego in check, realize there may be a lot to learn outside of “educational” porn clips, and settle in for an informative experience—don’t worry, we’ve got you covered.

Why can’t I seem to find her G-Spot?

The G-spot is located just inside the front wall of the vagina and can be very difficult to find if she is not aroused. Once aroused, her urethral sponge or G-Spot will become swollen as blood rushes to it, making it much easier to locate.

What are the signs of female arousal?

There are several indicators that a woman is aroused, ranging from increased wetness, erect nipples, dilated pupils, and increased pulse, just to name a few.

What triggers female arousal?

Sight, smell, touch, communication… the list goes on, but Promescent makes a female arousal spray that is sure to help get things started.

Can all women have a G-Spot orgasm?

Studies show that some women can find G-spot stimulation irritating. In contrast, others do not experience any pleasure from G-Spot stimulation during certain times of their monthly cycle. So, you may want to try at different times during the month to see if she is more sensitive to stimulation at different times of her cycle.

Techniques to Give Her Better Orgasms

1. Try a Delay Spray to Last Longer

About one in three men experience premature ejaculation, and some men deal with the issue on a regular basis.

The problem is, it can take women longer to reach orgasm than men already, so premature ejaculation issues can make it even harder to help her get over the threshold when you’ve already finished.

If you consistently hit your climax point and the refractory period before she gets anywhere near the big bang, it may be wise to dry a delay spray to help you last longer in bed.

The average point of climax for a female is more than 13 minutes.

For example, Promescent Delay Spray for Men is applied to the most sensitive parts of your penis just before sex to help you slow down the process just enough to put you on an even keel with your female partner.

2. Learn How to Be Better at Foreplay

Women are more likely to need a little encouragement before their body starts to respond, which means foreplay is a huge factor in delivering better orgasms and maybe even delivering orgasms at all.

Foreplay is the warm-up phase for a female. This warm-up period builds anticipation, encourages blood flow to her lady parts, and triggers natural lubrication.

And, there is a direct link between foreplay and the intensity or satisfaction with her orgasm.

So, unless she seems all about a heat-of-the-moment throwdown, don’t skip it.

Foreplay tips for men to use on a woman are relatively abundant, and even injecting just a few tricks can really make a difference in her ability to climax either before or during intercourse.

The top three tips to remember about foreplay:

  1. Don’t rush it and don’t act like it’s just some obligatory act you’re being forced to do. Let her see you enjoy the process just as much as she does.
  2. Start foreplay outside of the bedroom by stimulating her emotionally and mentally. Tell her how sexy she is, whisper something seductive in her ear, do something to take some stress out of her day.
  3. Be gentle and start slow. Don’t just dive all in with your fingers and expect her to respond. Caress her, rub her, massage her, kiss her.

3. Mind Your Exercise and Diet

Yes, really.

BUT, if you really want to give her a better orgasm, getting in shape and increasing your stamina can be a REALLY big deal. Here are a few thoughts to explain why:

  • You overloaded on pizza and beer, and then you try to have sex with a bloated gut, making it harder to grind against her clitoris during penetration.
  • You’ve been slacking in the workout/diet department, gained some pounds, and lost some strength. She wants to try a new position to help her orgasm, but you’re too out of shape to oblige.
  • You’ve followed a diet of caffeine and junk for weeks. She’s slow to reach orgasm, and you just don’t have the stamina to get her there.

4. Get the Conversation Started and Keep On Talking

Verbalizing about sex doesn’t come naturally for everyone, but the more you can talk, exchange ideas, and give guidance in the bedroom, the more equipped you both will be to please each other.

It doesn’t hurt to ask her what she likes, what really gets her to her breaking point, and even how she gets herself off when playing solo.

You may be amazed at what you learn and just how you’ve been doing it all wrong.

Once you’ve started talking about how to give her an orgasm, keep the communication lines flowing even when you make it to the bedroom.

Don’t be afraid to:

  • Ask her if she likes it when you rub her this way
  • Ask her if you’re hitting her G-spot
  • Ask her if she wants a new position to help her finish

All this sexy talk isn’t all about getting guidance; it can also be a highly arousing exchange for both of you.

5. Don’t Shy Away from Sex Toys

Ladies often reach for vibrators and other sex toys for some solo play, but there is nothing wrong with bringing them into the equation when it’s the two of you.

If she’s having a harder time getting there with just your stimulation alone (or if you just want to have fun), consider picking out some toys.

The sex toy lineup out there these days is all-out impressive.

Wands meant to directly hit the G-spot, strap-in-place vibrators for ongoing clitoral stimulation, and even cock rings that have fancy protruding ticklers on top that wriggle and gyrate for her C-spot—the list could go on forever.

Make a game of picking out a toy you both want to try, and give it a go. You may find all-new ways to cause a female orgasm in the process.

6. Pick the Sexual Positions Most Apt to Encourage Orgasm

If you’re shooting to make her orgasm in a certain way, taking advantage of certain positions can really help. Check out our guide on sex positions to last longer.

For example:

  • Missionary (you on top) can be good for clitoral orgasms because you can grind right against her clitoral area
  • Cowgirl (her on top) can be great for G-spot orgasms but also allows her to control pressure on her clitoral area for orgasmic control there too
  • Rear-Entry (doggy style) can be an awesome way to hit her G-spot

7.

Use Lube for Frictionless Pleasure

When a female gets aroused, her body produces a natural lube, and she can create an abundance of it most of the time.

This lube keeps her vaginal opening and clitoris wet so there is no friction during play and intercourse and she can enjoy stimulation more and reach orgasm easier.

It is perfectly normal for the amount of natural lube for females to be lacking sometimes, so you may need a little help to deter friction at times.

Pick a high-quality lube like this premium organic lube from Promescent, which is pH-balanced and safe with condoms.

The Female Anatomy and Arousal Process Explained

Basically, most women can have two types of orgasms with the proper stimulation: an internal (vaginal) orgasm that usually happens during some type of penetration and an external clitoral (C-spot) orgasm.

To better understand the female orgasm, you have to first get familiar with two hot spots of the female anatomy.

The G-spot

No doubt you’ve heard about it, you may have tried to find it, and it is a little elusive in the eyes of most men.

The G-spot is one of the most sensitive internal parts of the female anatomy and is suspected to play a role in the vaginal orgasm.

  • But, where is it?
  • What does it feel like?
  • Where can you find it?

You shouldn’t feel bad if you have a hard time pinpointing the G-spot. The targeted “spot” can vary depending on the woman and her personal anatomy.

G-spot is short for the Gräfenberg spot.

Most often, the spot is located no more than four inches inside the vaginal opening. The spot is actually facing her spinal column.

You may find it by using one or two fingers, palm up, and stroking in a “come-hither” motion.

Some say the spot feels a bit like a walnut because the skin is slightly tougher and maybe a bit wrinkly. However, your biggest indicator that you’ve found it is her reaction.

In fact, she can probably do a good job of pointing you in the right direction, so don’t be afraid to ask.

The C-Spot

The C-spot is just a fancy way to refer to the clitoris, and any man learning how to give her an orgasm must get really educated about this part of the female anatomy.

The clitoris is actually a wishbone-shaped area located above the vaginal opening.

Literally, thousands of nerve-endings make up the clitoral area, and the apex of the C-spot is the tiny pearl of flesh located just under the clitoral hood.

More women actually experience a clitoral orgasm than a vaginal orgasm, and it doesn’t always happen during sexual intercourse.

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Get a Premium Lube, Arousal Gel, and Delay Spray

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Get both Delay Spray and Delay Wipes, paired with Arousal Gel

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A Look at Her Arousal Process and Setting the Mood

Guys are more likely to be standing at full attention and ready to roll right away. Women can need a little more encouragement.

The typical arousal process for a female usually looks something like what follows:

Desire – The desire to have sex is where it all starts. Her skin may flush, blood flow increases to her nipples and her clitoris, and her internal walls may start to produce lubrication and swell.

Arousal – Arousal is the state before orgasm. Her body is gaining sexual tension, so her muscles may become tenser, she will likely produce more lubrication, and her nipples may grow erect and her clitoris even more sensitive.

Orgasm – The peak point of arousal when the stars align, the heavens open up, and the angels sing. Okay, so physically speaking, her body is wracked with waves of pleasurable contractions, she takes in more oxygen, her blood pressure rises, and she reaches a point of release when the tension building to this point is finally released.

Resolution – Resolution is the finality, the blissful, relaxed time after an orgasm when all is right with the world. The body is enjoying those doses of oxytocin produced during orgasm and returning to normal.

Your process looks a lot the same but can happen in rapid-fire succession. She may need a little help from you to really work through the earliest stages.

Set the mood by:

  • Treating her well; making her happy
  • Caressing her lovingly
  • Kissing her
    • Lowering the lights
    • Showing her you’re interested
    • Expressing what you want to do to her

      The Different Ways to Make Her Orgasm

      With your brushed-up knowledge on her anatomy and arousal process, you are almost ready to induce female orgasm. Nevertheless, you should also know, just like you, she can have an orgasm in different ways.

      Orgasm from Finger/Hand Play

      Females usually use their own hands and fingers to make themselves orgasm during masturbation, and there’s no doubt you can do the same with a little guidance from her.

      Using your hands and fingers to make her come gives you a little more control over the situation than during penetration, which may be necessary if she usually has a hard time getting there during sex.

      Orgasm from Penetration

      It is a common misconception that women should always have an orgasm during sex, but this is actually the hardest to pull off for a few reasons:

      • Inducing orgasm during penetration may require a specific position
      • Inducing orgasm during penetration may require simultaneous clitoral stimulation for a woman who has a harder time reaching vaginal orgasms
      • Inducing orgasm during penetration can be tough for guys who can’t last as long as their female partner

      If the last item on the list is your biggest issue, try a Promescent delay spray to delay your own climax.

      Also, you can make use of those hands and fingers or your mouth during foreplay to get her closer to orgasm before you actually get started.

      Orgasm from Oral

      Oral sex is actually one of the easiest ways to make a woman orgasm, especially if you know what you’re doing. Check our guide to the venus butterfly technique.

      Oral usually involves direct and indirect stimulation of her clitoris with your mouth and tongue, which can be wetter and gentler than your fingers.

      Of course, you can always do a combination of oral and finger play to bring her to her release.

      If you really want to heighten the potential for a mind-blowing orgasm, try the venus butterfly technique.

      Takeaways

      • Get familiar with her anatomy and her arousal process
      • She can have more than one type of orgasm
      • Orgasms do not always happen during penetration
      • Every female is different; let her tell you what she likes
      • Delay spray can close the “orgasm gap” between you and your partner
      • Use foreplay to your advantage
      • When in doubt, let her guide you

      There you have it—a detailed, in-depth, truthful guide about how to make a girl orgasm.

      It’s not as difficult as it can sound but definitely can be more complicated than what the movies make it.

      If you’ve paid attention, she’ll likely be visiting O-Town with your help in nothing flat.

      If you didn’t… well, this guide will be posted for repeat reference for the long haul.

      You’ll get there. More importantly, you’ll get her there!

        Related Articles

        • A Guide To Cunnilingus: Tips, Techniques, And More
        • The Orgasm Gap: FAQ’s & Ways To Close It
        • How To Perform The Venus Butterfly Technique, Tips And Guidelines
        • How To Have An Orgasm: Best Positions, Techniques And Toys

        How to bring a girl to orgasm

        Sex

        22 May

        Women often fake an orgasm so as not to offend their partner. This instruction will help to make moans sincere.

        Forget about the myths

        The female orgasm is shrouded in myths. For example, that it has dozens of species, or that it is impossible without a member. If you do not dwell on these misconceptions, then it will be much easier to achieve results.

        Myth 1. The penis is the main tool for satisfying a woman

        You probably used to think that the bigger the cock the better and the longer you last the more pleasure she will get. All this is a lie.

        But the truth. Researchers asked hundreds of women a direct question about what matters most to them during intercourse, and none of the participants mentioned penis size. Instead, women said they were crazy about men who care about their pleasure.

        Myth 2. Good sex ends with a simultaneous orgasm

        This is how they show it in the movies: a man energetically enters a woman, and — yes, yes, more! They both experience fast and fabulous orgasms. In fact, simultaneous orgasms are a myth.

        To bring your partner to maximum pleasure, you must be focused on her feelings, and to experience it yourself, completely immerse yourself in yours. As you can imagine, it’s hard to put it all together. A partner can experience pleasure both before you and after. And it is much more convenient than to achieve simultaneous discharge.

        Myth 3. Women need intercourse to achieve orgasm

        Pleasure Point author Lori Mintz says that only 15% of women can achieve orgasm through intercourse. The remaining 85% need clitoral stimulation.

        The clitoris is the key to the female orgasm. This proves once again the fact that only 1.5% of women masturbate with an object in the vagina. Another 12% do the same, touching their clitoris at the same time. And the rest — a whopping 86.5% — get their pleasure solely through clitoral stimulation. So the main thing to remember is that frictions lead to orgasm for you, but not for your partner. Her pleasure point is her clitoris.

        Prepare for the meeting

        Sex begins long before penetration. So you need to prepare yourself and bring your partner into the right mood.

        Locate the clitoris

        Horrible, but according to Laurie Mintz, 25% of men don’t know where the clitoris is. Therefore, she recommends carefully studying anatomy and watching realistic (not cinematic) masturbation training videos on OMGYes.com.

        Image: sayukichi/Shutterstock

        Arrange for sex

        It often happens that one partner wants to have sex, while the other wants to study for an exam, work, watch TV or just go to bed early. Agree on an intimate adventure in advance – then the girl will be ready for what awaits her, and it will be easier for you to achieve your goal.

        Get rid of stress

        Stress reduces interest, and in almost everyone it reduces the ability to enjoy. If your partner works from morning to night, pulls a mortgage and three children, is under constant stress, you can forget about an orgasm. So before you move on to sex, take 20 minutes or even an hour to relax in a comfortable environment.

        Ask the girl what helps her recover. A bath, a walk, sports, cooking, heart-to-heart talk, a glass of wine—anything as long as it works.

        Create a context

        Women’s pleasure is closely related to the context – external circumstances and internal state. What exactly sets up a girl for sex depends on her. But usually the ideal context = low stress + admiration for a partner + erotic setting. So candles, music and your irresistible appearance will not be superfluous.

        Get down to business

        But don’t rush to get in.

        Take time to warm up

        Modern sex scenarios focus mainly on what you and your partner do between the legs, but most women need about 20 minutes of warm-up before doing this, so that the blood rushes to the genitals and the natural lubrication is released. Thanks to this, touch will bring pleasure, not pain.

        Here are a few ways to warm up:

        • Kiss each other on the lips in every possible way (gently, forcefully, with or without tongue).
        • Kiss each other on the neck, ears and other parts of the face while still dressed.
        • Stroke and caress each other through clothes.
        • Roll over in bed with your clothes on.
        • Undress yourself or undress each other.
        • Stroke, kiss and caress your partner’s breasts.
        • Play with her nipples: gently roll them between your fingers, suck, pull or pinch if she is turned on.
        • Stroke and kiss each other’s naked bodies without staying anywhere for long. Many women say that they like it when a partner teases them for a while, touching their genitals, and then starting to caress again in other places.

        You can also shower or bathe together, laugh, joke and have fun. Show your imagination!

        Work on her clitoris

        When both of you are warm enough, move on to clitoral stimulation. Do this for as long as it takes. In general, women need between 15 and 45 minutes to orgasm. An interesting statistic: if clitoral stimulation is given for 20 minutes or more, about 92% of women experience an orgasm.

        Tip: Start by gently touching her clit and let her tell you when to push harder. The clitoris is a very delicate organ, so it’s better when she says “More” and not “Oh!”.

        Find out what she likes

        Women have different nerve endings. Therefore, there is no universal recipe for pleasure: everyone likes their own kind of touch.

        To further complicate matters, let’s add that the stimulation a woman needs for orgasm can change at different times (for example, depending on the phase of the menstrual cycle). So only one thing will help bring the girl to relaxation – the desire to listen to her and hear.

        How do you know what a woman wants today? Here are three ways:

        1. Just ask. Conversations during sex are very short, but they can significantly affect the situation. For example, you will say: “Tell me what you like?”, or “I want you to tell me if this suits you”, or “I want to please you. Show that you enjoy it.”
        2. Let her fingers speak. Put your hand on top of the partner’s hand, giving her a signal: you want her to show what kind of touch she likes. When she does, follow her instructions (where, with what force, exactly how).
        3. Listen. Rapid breathing, intensifying groans and requests to continue usually tell you that you are going in the right direction. But if a girl does not show emotions, most likely something is wrong, but she is embarrassed to say so. In this case, return to methods 1 and 2.

        Have an orgasm

        You can first bring your partner to orgasm with clitoral stimulation, and then move on to intercourse and get your portion of pleasure, or vice versa. Do not seek to experience an orgasm at the same time – remember that this is a myth. Moreover, it deprives the pleasure of watching and feeling the orgasm of a partner.

        Enjoy the pleasant aftertaste

        Couples who hug, talk, shower together, or otherwise interact with each other immediately afterwards report greater satisfaction with their sex life and relationships in general.

        Be close

        After sex, many women want to prolong intimacy: cuddle, chat, or just fall asleep together. Showing concern excites women much more than penis size and sophistication in love affairs. Remember this if you suddenly want to turn your back to the wall or reach for the phone to call a taxi.

        Talk after sex

        Many couples find it helpful to “process the information” right after sex. This will help make it better next time. Ask the girl what she liked the most and what could be even nicer. Just do not make claims: it is better to criticize behind the bedroom doors.

        Read also 🍌💞🥑

        • Why do some women cry after sex and is it normal
        • How to make perfect foreplay
        • 5 best sex positions for female orgasm

        How to bring a girl to orgasm?

        Answers

        July 14, 2020

        There are two parts to achieving orgasm: the emotional part and the technical part. Let’s consider each of them.

        This question was sent by our reader. You can also ask your question to Lifehacker – if it is interesting, we will definitely answer.

        How to bring a girl to orgasm?

        Sergey Sartakov

        Amina Nazaralieva

        Sexologist, psychotherapist, co-founder of the Mental Health Center.

        First, some theory. Our sexual desire and arousal are affected by two pedals: the gas and the brake. Lazy fantasies that it would be nice to turn on porn or cuddle – this is 10 kilometers per hour, and 200 kilometers per hour is a confident movement towards orgasm.

        If you’re driving at 30 km/h and even lightly apply the brakes, it may be enough to make it no longer fun to ride. And if you are driving 200 km per hour and slowed down to 190 without accelerating to orgasm, the girl may still think: “Damn, I had a great ride.”

        There is an emotional part and a technical part in achieving orgasm, let’s take a closer look at each.

        Emotional part

        The factors that affect the gas and brake depend on the preferences and characteristics of the partner. For some, it’s bad breath. For others, it may be violence, thoughts of betrayal, an important phone call, turning on the light, worry about your own body, a crying baby, fatigue, stress at work, illness. Or hurtful words spoken by a partner: insults, depreciation, unflattering comments. It is extremely rare – the erection that has disappeared from the partner. An important point is the pain, if they did it wrong, they scratched it.

        One factor that puts pressure on the brakes is safety concerns. It may involve domestic or sexual abuse in the past or in a current relationship. This makes the partner tense and afraid.

        Contraception is the second most common concern for women: if not available, it is unreliable or protects against pregnancy but not against sexually transmitted infections. By increasing the level of safety, you can help your partner relax and accelerate as much as possible.

        Factors that increase arousal are also different for everyone. Someone excites a particular kuni technique, and someone likes to have sex in front of witnesses.

        And other girls will be excited by maximum security, trust, care and everything that confirms that everything is fine in your relationship. That is, everything that happened even before you were naked in bed.

        The most difficult question is how to understand that a particular girl presses the gas the best. We don’t know in advance. We can find out statistically that some group of women prefers this. Everything else you have to find out yourself – by talking to a girl. She may know, but she is shy and expects you to take the initiative and ask. And if a girl has little experience, then masturbation and exploration of her body alone or with you will help her.

        One must learn to speak directly about one’s wishes and dislikes. This will be useful for most women. And most men will benefit from a little less blind certainty that everything is more or less the same for women.

        We have reached the cornerstone of any sexual contact – the question of consent. It’s best to approach sex with a beginner’s mind, especially with a new partner. But not only: the mood, body condition, emotional and mental state, level of fatigue can also change in a habitual partner.

        Approach the girl as if you are seeing her for the first time and do not know exactly what she will like right now. Be prepared to ask with curiosity, respect, and a willingness to hear no and back off if prompted.

        You must doubt that you know in advance and correctly read all the signals of women. In your actions, rely only on “yes”, which is said with enthusiasm and really leaves no doubt that the person wants it.

        Technical

        The more banal and traditional side, which is reflected in most sex training, is the technical one, about how to directly interact with the genitals.

        Remember – the clitoris is the head of everything. If we’re talking about orgasm, then most women don’t need a dick in their vagina to experience an orgasm. Enough of what your hands, lips and maybe a vibrator will do to her clit.

        At the same time, only a little more than a quarter of women are able to experience an orgasm only from the penetration of the penis. Most need some extra stimulation, and that’s perfectly normal. This usually involves changing the position so that the clitoris is accessible to your or her fingers. Often this is a “spoon” or doggy-style pose. The clitoris can also be stimulated not with fingers, but with a vibrator, which is convenient to hold during intercourse – it definitely brings you to orgasm.

        It is also important to remember that you should not immediately rush to the visible part of the clitoris, it can even hurt. Most girls prefer a neat and slow approach to this area. The clitoris is also stimulated when you caress the areas closest to its visible part: the vagina, vulva, labia major or minor.


        If the orgasm doesn’t happen, that’s okay too. You don’t have to cum at the same time. It is considered good if the partner came first, but if you came earlier, you still have hands, lips, toys to bring her to orgasm if she wants to. And vice versa, in the same way, a girl can help her partner finish if he wants it. I emphasize this, because not always and not all people want to finish. Many feel that they are too tired, and then the race for orgasm can turn into torture.

        People who believe that every sex should end with an orgasm often try to get it out at all costs. Because they love their partner very much or it is important for them that everyone has an orgasm.