What are the most common sexual fantasies among men. How can these fantasies enhance your sex life. Is it normal to have sexual fantasies about scenarios beyond your current relationship. Can discussing fantasies with your partner improve intimacy.

The Prevalence and Importance of Male Sexual Fantasies

Sexual fantasies are a natural and widespread aspect of human sexuality, particularly among men. Dr. Justin Lehmiller, a research fellow at the Kinsey Institute, conducted a comprehensive study revealing that over 98% of men report having sexual fantasies. These mental scenarios often push boundaries, allowing individuals to explore their deepest desires and add excitement to their sex lives.

Contrary to popular belief, having sexual fantasies does not necessarily indicate dissatisfaction with one’s current partner. Instead, they can serve as a healthy outlet for imagination and a potential source of inspiration for enhancing real-life intimate experiences.

Fantasy #1: Partner-Initiated Sexual Encounters

One of the most common fantasies among men involves their partner taking control and initiating sexual encounters. This scenario often appeals to men who typically take charge in their relationships, as it offers a refreshing change of pace and allows them to experience a different dynamic in the bedroom.

Why is this fantasy so appealing?

• It provides a break from routine
• Allows for sexual surrender and submission
• Can be exciting for men who usually take the lead

To introduce this fantasy into your sex life, communication is key. Depending on the nature of your relationship, you may find it easier to broach the subject with a long-term partner or during the early stages of dating. Dr. Andrew Smiler, a sex therapist, suggests that discussing fantasies with a new partner can be less intimidating, as there may be less fear of rejection.

Fantasy #2: Threesomes and Group Encounters

Fantasies involving multiple partners are prevalent across the spectrum of male sexuality. Contrary to common assumptions, these fantasies are not always centered on personal gratification. Many men find excitement in the idea of their partner being pleasured by someone else, adding a new dimension to their sexual experiences.

Challenges of Realizing Threesome Fantasies

1. Potential jealousy and insecurity
2. Logistical difficulties in finding a third partner
3. Some individuals view sex as an intimate two-person experience

While threesomes can be challenging to negotiate in real life, they can potentially introduce new techniques and experiences that benefit both partners. If you and your partner are open to exploring this fantasy, it’s crucial to establish clear boundaries and maintain open communication throughout the process.

Fantasy #3: Submission and BDSM Experiences

Submission fantasies, which may include elements of bondage, discipline, dominance, and sadomasochism (BDSM), are common among men of various sexual orientations. Dr. Lehmiller’s research suggests that non-heterosexual men tend to have more BDSM-related fantasies compared to their heterosexual counterparts.

This trend may be partially attributed to the fact that gay, bisexual, and pansexual men have already challenged societal norms regarding sexuality, making it easier for them to explore other aspects of their desires.

Introducing BDSM Elements Safely

If you’re interested in incorporating submissive or BDSM elements into your sex life, it’s essential to address potential concerns with your partner. Some individuals may worry about causing harm or discomfort. To mitigate these concerns, consider implementing the following safety measures:

• Establish a safe word or phrase to immediately halt any activity
• Start with mild forms of BDSM and gradually progress
• Regularly check in with your partner during sexual activities
• Educate yourselves about safe BDSM practices

Fantasy #4: Exhibitionism and Public Sexual Encounters

The thrill of engaging in sexual activities in public places is a common fantasy for many men. This desire often stems from the taboo nature of such encounters and the associated rush of adrenaline and dopamine.

Why is exhibitionism appealing?

• It’s considered “naughty” or forbidden
• Provides a dopamine rush and physical arousal
• Adds excitement and novelty to sexual experiences

While the fantasy of public sex can be exhilarating, it’s important to remember that engaging in such activities can have legal consequences. If you’re interested in exploring this fantasy with your partner, consider safer alternatives that capture the essence of exhibitionism without breaking laws or compromising privacy.

The Role of Communication in Exploring Fantasies

Open and honest communication is crucial when it comes to sharing and potentially acting on sexual fantasies. Discussing your desires with your partner can lead to increased intimacy and a more fulfilling sex life. However, it’s important to approach these conversations with sensitivity and respect for your partner’s boundaries.

Tips for Discussing Fantasies with Your Partner

1. Choose an appropriate time and place for the conversation
2. Start with less intense fantasies to gauge your partner’s comfort level
3. Be prepared to listen to your partner’s fantasies as well
4. Respect each other’s boundaries and limits
5. Consider seeking guidance from a sex therapist if needed

Remember that not all fantasies need to be acted upon in real life. Sometimes, simply sharing and discussing these desires can enhance intimacy and spark new ideas for your sex life.

The Impact of Fantasies on Sexual Satisfaction

Research suggests that individuals who are more open about their sexual fantasies tend to experience higher levels of sexual satisfaction. By exploring and sharing these desires, couples can discover new ways to pleasure each other and maintain excitement in their relationships.

Benefits of Embracing Sexual Fantasies

• Increased sexual satisfaction
• Enhanced communication and intimacy
• Opportunity to explore new aspects of sexuality
• Reduced sexual boredom or monotony
• Improved understanding of personal desires and boundaries

It’s important to note that fantasies are not necessarily a reflection of real-life desires or intentions. Many people enjoy fantasizing about scenarios they would never want to experience in reality. Understanding this distinction can help alleviate any guilt or shame associated with having unconventional fantasies.

Navigating Boundaries and Consent in Fantasy Exploration

While exploring sexual fantasies can be exciting and fulfilling, it’s crucial to prioritize consent and establish clear boundaries. This is particularly important when considering fantasies that involve multiple partners or power dynamics.

Key Considerations for Ethical Fantasy Exploration

1. Obtain enthusiastic consent from all involved parties
2. Establish clear boundaries and limits beforehand
3. Use safe words or signals to ensure comfort and safety
4. Respect the right to withdraw consent at any time
5. Regularly check in with partners during and after sexual activities

Remember that consent is an ongoing process, and it’s essential to maintain open communication throughout any sexual encounter, especially when exploring new territory.

The Role of Fantasy in Maintaining Long-term Sexual Satisfaction

Sexual fantasies can play a crucial role in maintaining passion and excitement in long-term relationships. By regularly exploring new desires and scenarios, couples can prevent sexual monotony and keep their intimate lives fresh and engaging.

Ways to Incorporate Fantasies into Long-term Relationships

• Set aside time for fantasy exploration and discussion
• Experiment with role-playing or costumes
• Use erotic literature or pornography as inspiration
• Try new locations or settings for intimacy
• Incorporate sex toys or props that align with shared fantasies

By maintaining an open and curious attitude towards sexuality, couples can continue to grow and evolve together, strengthening their bond and ensuring long-lasting sexual satisfaction.

Overcoming Shame and Guilt Associated with Sexual Fantasies

Despite the prevalence and normalcy of sexual fantasies, many individuals experience feelings of shame or guilt about their desires. These negative emotions can stem from societal taboos, religious beliefs, or personal insecurities.

Strategies for Embracing Your Fantasies

1. Educate yourself about the prevalence and diversity of sexual fantasies
2. Challenge negative self-talk and cognitive distortions
3. Seek support from a sex-positive therapist or counselor
4. Join online communities or support groups for individuals with similar fantasies
5. Practice self-compassion and acceptance

Remember that having fantasies is a normal and healthy part of human sexuality. By working to overcome shame and guilt, you can fully embrace your desires and potentially enhance your sexual experiences.

The Intersection of Technology and Sexual Fantasies

In the digital age, technology has opened up new avenues for exploring and expressing sexual fantasies. From virtual reality experiences to interactive sex toys, there are numerous ways to engage with fantasies in a safe and controlled environment.

Technological Innovations in Fantasy Exploration

• Virtual reality pornography and erotic experiences
• Teledildonic devices for long-distance intimacy
• AI-powered chatbots for fantasy role-play
• Augmented reality apps for visualizing fantasies
• Online platforms for connecting with like-minded individuals

While technology can enhance fantasy exploration, it’s important to maintain a balance between digital experiences and real-life intimacy. Use these tools as supplements to, rather than replacements for, human connection.

The Cultural and Societal Influences on Male Sexual Fantasies

Sexual fantasies are not formed in a vacuum; they are often shaped by cultural, societal, and media influences. Understanding these factors can provide insight into the origins and prevalence of certain fantasies among men.

Factors Influencing Male Sexual Fantasies

1. Portrayal of masculinity and sexuality in media
2. Cultural norms and expectations regarding male sexuality
3. Exposure to pornography and erotic content
4. Personal experiences and relationships
5. Religious and moral upbringing

By examining these influences, men can gain a better understanding of their desires and potentially challenge harmful or unrealistic expectations surrounding male sexuality.

The Therapeutic Potential of Sexual Fantasies

Beyond their role in enhancing sexual pleasure, fantasies can serve important psychological and therapeutic functions. Many sex therapists and researchers recognize the potential benefits of exploring and understanding one’s sexual fantasies.

Therapeutic Applications of Fantasy Exploration

• Overcoming sexual anxiety or performance issues
• Processing past trauma or negative experiences
• Enhancing self-awareness and sexual identity
• Improving body image and self-esteem
• Developing healthier attitudes towards sexuality

If you’re interested in exploring the therapeutic aspects of your fantasies, consider working with a qualified sex therapist who can provide guidance and support throughout the process.

The Evolution of Sexual Fantasies Throughout Life

Sexual fantasies are not static; they often evolve and change throughout an individual’s lifetime. Factors such as age, relationship status, and life experiences can all influence the content and frequency of sexual fantasies.

Common Shifts in Sexual Fantasies Over Time

1. Increased focus on emotional connection in later life
2. Shifts in power dynamics as individuals gain confidence
3. Incorporation of new experiences and knowledge
4. Adaptation to changing physical abilities or health conditions
5. Reflection of changing societal norms and attitudes

Embracing the evolving nature of your fantasies can lead to a richer and more fulfilling sexual life as you age and grow.

The Importance of Fantasy in Sexual Health and Well-being

Sexual fantasies play a crucial role in overall sexual health and well-being. They serve as a safe outlet for desires, help maintain sexual interest, and can contribute to improved mental and emotional health.

Benefits of a Healthy Fantasy Life

• Stress relief and relaxation
• Improved mood and self-esteem
• Enhanced creativity and imagination
• Increased sexual satisfaction and libido
• Better understanding of personal desires and boundaries

By recognizing the value of sexual fantasies and incorporating them into your life in a healthy way, you can experience improved overall well-being and sexual satisfaction.

Navigating Differences in Sexual Fantasies Between Partners

It’s common for partners to have different sexual fantasies or varying levels of interest in exploring them. Navigating these differences requires patience, understanding, and effective communication.

Strategies for Addressing Fantasy Discrepancies

1. Practice active listening and empathy
2. Find common ground or overlapping interests
3. Negotiate compromises and boundaries
4. Explore fantasy sharing through dirty talk or role-play
5. Consider seeking guidance from a couples therapist

Remember that a healthy sexual relationship doesn’t require perfect alignment of fantasies. Instead, focus on creating a safe and supportive environment where both partners feel comfortable expressing their desires and working towards mutual satisfaction.

The Role of Fantasy in Sexual Education and Awareness

Discussing and exploring sexual fantasies can play a valuable role in sexual education and awareness. By openly addressing these topics, we can promote a more comprehensive understanding of human sexuality and reduce stigma surrounding diverse desires.

Educational Benefits of Fantasy Exploration

• Increased awareness of sexual diversity
• Better understanding of consent and boundaries
• Improved sexual communication skills
• Enhanced knowledge of sexual anatomy and response
• Reduced shame and guilt surrounding sexuality

Incorporating discussions of fantasies into sexual education programs can lead to more well-rounded and sex-positive attitudes among individuals of all ages.

The Future of Sexual Fantasy Research and Understanding

As our understanding of human sexuality continues to evolve, so too does our knowledge of sexual fantasies. Ongoing research in this field promises to shed new light on the origins, functions, and potential benefits of sexual fantasies.

Emerging Areas of Fantasy Research

1. Neurological basis of sexual fantasies
2. Impact of virtual reality on fantasy experiences
3. Cultural variations in fantasy content and prevalence
4. Relationship between fantasies and sexual orientation
5. Therapeutic applications of guided fantasy exploration

As we gain more insights into the nature of sexual fantasies, we can develop better strategies for incorporating them into healthy sexual relationships and promoting overall sexual well-being.

The Top 6 Sexual Fantasies for Men — and How They Can Improve Your Sex Life

The nature of sexual fantasies is that they push the boundaries a bit, stir up your usual mix, and allow you to explore the depth of your desires. And however deeply buried you keep those fantasies in your brain, they’re nothing to be ashamed of.

“In my own research on the subject, I find that more than 98 percent of men report having fantasies,” says Justin Lehmiller, PhD, a research fellow at the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University in Bloomington and the author of Tell Me What You Want. Sex therapists agree that sexual fantasies don’t necessarily indicate dissatisfaction with one’s current partner, either.

Dr. Lehmiller surveyed more than 4,000 American adults about their sexual fantasies for his book, and certain scenarios popped up more frequently than others. According to his research, as well as testaments from other sex therapists, the following are six of the most common sexual fantasies men have — along with tips on how you can bring some of that excitement to your IRL bedroom. For the most part, the fantasies don’t differ much whether you’re gay, straight, or somewhere in between; only the gender of the partner does.

1. His Partner Pursues Him and Takes Control

A little break from your reality is what fantasizing is all about. So the idea of your partner directing the sex script for the night — particularly if your role in the relationship is typically the take-charge guy — can feel like a breakthrough bedroom change. “Sexual surrender is a way to say, ‘I need you to take control. I need to submit to you,’” says Dan Lacovara, a licensed marriage and family therapist for the Center for Healthy Sex in Washington, DC.

To get your partner on board with this kind of role reversal, or any type of fantasy you may have, consider how well you know your current partner. “If you’re at a second-date scenario, what do you have to lose?” says Andrew Smiler, PhD, a sex therapist based in Winston-Salem, North Carolina, and the author of Dating and Sex, adding that there may be less fear of rejection since you haven’t yet invested much time or effort into the person. “If you’re with a long-term partner, you have more to lose — but you may have a better sense of how to approach the conversation.”

2. Could More Be Merrier? A Threesome

Lots of guys, across the sexual board, are very into the multipartner fantasy. And despite common notions about threesomes, it’s not always about selfishly having a new person in the mix for yourself. “Many men are excited about the concept of their partner being pleasured by someone else,” says Lacovara.

Negotiating a threesome with your partner may be more difficult than some of these other common fantasies. “Jealousy and insecurity come into play,” says Lacovara. (Not to mention the logistics of finding someone else to join in.) “For some people, sex is an intimate two-person experience for them, and they aren’t comfortable with that being interrupted.”

But if you do have a partner who is game to try it out, you might discover that something the third person does is a real turn-on that you haven’t thought about doing. “You both can learn a trick or two,” he says.

3. Submission: He’s Tied Up, Teased, and Spanked

This type of fantasy takes the sexual surrender theme to a kinkier place. And while men of any sexual persuasion can dream of being submissive in the bedroom, Lehmiller says that men who identify as anything other than heterosexual tend to have more fantasies about BDSM (bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, and sadism and masochism) relative to their heterosexual counterparts. “I think this is at least partly explained by the fact that gay, bisexual, and pansexual men have already violated the norm of heterosexuality, which makes it less costly to violate other sexual norms and explore their sexuality fully,” he says.

If you want to bring this one up with your partner, be prepared for the possibility that they may worry they’re going to hurt you. “It can be triggering to some partners to feel comfortable with pain exchange,” says Lacovara. You can help ease their concerns by setting up a safe word or phrase, a prearranged signal to immediately end any sexual activity with no questions or judgment.

4. Exhibitionism: Sex in a Public Place

This type of fantasy clearly falls into the taboo category. “For most people who are into exhibitionism, the turn-on is that it’s naughty,” says Lacovara. “It’s something that people aren’t supposed to do, and the arousal isn’t just genital.” He says the body also gets flushed by dopamine, which is a neurotransmitter that gives you a sense of pleasure.

If you’re into the idea of trying this with your partner, be prepared to make a few compromises, since it’s perfectly natural for someone not to be turned on by the thought of being seen having sex — or the idea of possible arrest. “Ask your partner if they’re willing to dip a toe into the fantasy. Exhibitionism can be something that’s not so overt,” Lacovara says. You and your partner can test the waters by having sex in front of a window of your own home, rather than in a city park in broad daylight.

5. Domination: Pleasure Blended With Pain

Smiler says that BDSM power control, rough sex, and even choking have become more popular in fantasies as they’ve become more popular in porn. “Rough sex is a flavor that some men want on occasion, but not always as a regular flavor,” he says. “If you have to be very controlled in your daily life and you’re not allowed to have certain thoughts, in your fantasies, that’s a place where those desires are allowed to come out.”

If the idea of tying up, spanking, or pegging your partner floats your boat, it can be hot to give it a go in real life. But you need a clear line of communication with your partner before you test any of it out. “Say right up front, ‘I want to talk about this, and it’s kind of tricky for me,’” says Lacovara. “Partners need to talk about sex together, and you need to make sure there is a safe space for that.”

6. Role-Play: Trying Out New Identities

Whether your fantasy is to dress up like a cowboy, a construction worker, or a butler (you do you), this type of fantasy is simply cosplay. “You want to pretend to be something or someone different, and that can be one of the more playful parts of sex,” says Lacovara. “It’s very collaborative, and you are creating a whole new narrative when you’re role-playing.”

The great news if this type of fantasy gets you aroused is that it’s one of the easiest to turn into reality, says Lacovara. “These scenarios are low-risk, and even if it’s not working, it can become very funny,” he says. “The only real downside to it is how much you may need to invest in costumes.”

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Normal Male Sexual Fantasies

Ian Gavan/Getty Images

The typical male thinks about sex almost twice as much as the average woman. Now, we have a better idea of what they are thinking about, thanks to a recently published study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine.

A team of researchers at the University of Quebec at Trois-Rivieres asked a pool of 1,516 men and women, living in the province of Quebec, what they fantasized about sexually. The participants were anywhere from 18 to 77 years old, and the average age was 30 years.

Though the answers are not from a culturally diverse group, they still offer an interesting sample. Of the 717 men studied, 1.5% identified as being homosexual, 9.8% were bisexual, and the rest were heterosexual. (We describe the full study here.)

One of the surprising finds, according to the researchers, was the large percentage of participants who reported homosexual acts in their fantasies. Despite the less than 12% of males who reported being homosexual or bisexual:

• 26.8% of all male participants fantasized about giving oral sex to a man
• 20.6% of all male participants fantasized about having sex with another man

A larger percentage of women also reported homosexual fantasies.

The researchers conducted a two-part study. First, participants read and rated 55 statements describing different sexual fantasies. They rating scale was based on how intense the fantasy was for them on scale of one to seven, seven being the most intense, three being the least intense, and one or two meaning the person did not fantasize about that act.

Here are the 10 statements the highest percentage of men in the study said they fantasized about (a rating of three or higher):

Business Insider

The second half of the study asked participants to describe their favorite sexual fantasy if it was not one of the 55 statements they rated. Overall, men described more varied fantasies than women. And the researchers reported that the men’s fantasies were more detailed and specific than those of the female respondents.

The research team organized the participants written descriptions into different themes. Here are some of the themes from the male respondents and the percentage who reported these themes:

• Fantasies that involve watching people undressing or having sex (15%)
• Fantasies about different fetishes that involve feet, clothing or fabrics, and nonsexual objects (14%)
• Fantasies that involve sex with an authority figure or celebrity (4. 2%)
• Fantasies that involve zero gravity (1.4%)
• Fantasies specifically about infidelity (0.9%)

Below is the complete survey of questions with the percentage of men who reported fantasizing about each act. The grey boxes are the “common” fantasies that more than 50% of people said they had.

Joyal et al.

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Secrets of the Madrid court: 7 male erotic fantasies

Love and sex

Men’s fantasies on intimate topics sometimes have nothing to do with girls’ “vanilla” dreams, remaining for us terra incognita. At best, we’ll find out what he wants by stumbling – quite by accident, of course – on the video in his laptop, and at worst . .. But let’s not talk about sad things. Knowledge, as you know, not only multiplies sorrows, but also makes us omnipotent. Ekaterina Lyubimova, a well-known sex coach and founder of the SEX.RF Training Center network, compiled a rating of the most popular male fantasies for ELLE and shared tips on how to implement them.

It is worth mentioning right away. Firstly, the presence of erotic fantasies does not mean at all that something is wrong with your chosen one or that he is preparing to go “to the left”. Fantasies are normal for both men and women (admit it, you yourself sometimes think about something piquant). Secondly, despite the most common preferences, the attitude of each of us to certain subjects is individual. What for one will be just an innocent prank, for another can turn into a psychotrauma. Therefore, the main principle of “screening” secret desires should always remain voluntariness. Do only what pleases you and does not cause fear.

What is your name?

Sex with a stranger is one of the favorite stories of all time. Romance, passion, lack of embarrassment, obligations and fear of showing their spontaneous desires – what man has not dreamed of such a turn of events at least once? No need to condemn him for this, it’s better … become his stranger!

The easiest way to play “casual date” is to change the image or role play. Buy an erotic nurse costume, change your hair and makeup, put on a strict paramedic mask and start the foreplay with a “patient examination”, ending it with some unexpected technique. For more inventive couples, advanced “multi-act plays” such as playing strangers on the beach with a continuation in a hotel room are suitable.

Animal

In the desire to rudely and repeatedly “take” a woman, there is something animal, such sex makes a man feel like a wild male who does not waste time on “human” conventions in the form of gentle foreplay and romance. Admittedly, ladies often support such a fantasy. But unlike staged films, in life this plot is most often hindered by one “inconsistency” – the difference in the physiology of male and female arousal. To come into “combat readiness”, girls, as a rule, need about 30 minutes of foreplay. Little tricks can come to the rescue in such situations – special vaginal balls “for warming up” (use them 30-40 minutes before the intended proximity), a vibrating massager and even your own fingers.

Will you be third?

Sex with two girls (the so-called ZHMZH), another undisputed leader of male erotic fantasies, is associated with the natural polygamy of the stronger sex, the desire to possess as many women as possible. Most often, in reality, few couples venture into such experiments, which is quite fair. After all, the “third” is also a living person, which means that there is a high risk of resentment, complexes, and even a “love triangle”.

However, I have already described these and other dangers of threesomes in detail in a separate article. As well as about effective ways to find less risky substitutes for the “natural trio” – toys, role-playing games or new formats of sex.

Multi-move

The fantasy of possessing a woman orally, anally and vaginally in one “session” is connected with the desire to use all the partner’s erogenous zones and, as a result, realize one hundred percent as a man. If your companion is really one of those who are capable of such a marathon, come up with different stories of your proximity, not forgetting about safety precautions. For those whose partners do not differ in endurance, scenarios that simulate such penetrations are suitable. For example, caress him orally while stimulating yourself with a dildo attached to a vertical surface, and then move on to anal sex. Or, sitting in pose 69, give him a blowjob while he stimulates you with a double anal-vaginal stimulation vibrator.

Sensual mouth

Let me tell you a secret. If you are a master at blowjob, you will become the best woman in his life. I’m not kidding. For a man, oral sex is more than just caresses. Fellatio is not only the highest manifestation of trust in a couple, but also demonstrates the submission of a partner to the maximum. In addition, oral caresses, due to the more “relief” structure of the oral cavity and the ability to masterfully control the muscles, give a man an incomparable sensation, which many consider much brighter than vaginal sex.

It only takes three things to give him the blowjob of his dreams. The first is to master the relevant skills, preferably first on the simulator, and even better – under the supervision of a sex coach. The second is to use a special oil that removes unpleasant taste sensations and has an anesthetic effect. The third is to effectively present this “dish”. You can do it unexpectedly, or vice versa, torment him all day with intriguing hints and show off your signature number in a romantic evening setting. Fantasize!

Attack from the rear

At the top of the sex fantasy rankings is also anal sex. Like fellatio, this format of intimacy embodies high trust in a couple and male dominance. Many representatives of the stronger sex also love him for the acute sense of violation of the “prohibition” and the absence of the risk of unwanted conception. But, of course, one of the main reasons is the bright sensations that a narrower entrance provides.

Despite the fact that many modern couples practice anal sex, many girls are wary of this kind of sex. And not in vain – with improper preparation, it can really be harmful to health. But if you do everything “according to science”, you can not only give bliss to your partner, but also experience completely new sensations yourself.

Prerequisites for proper anal sex are preparation, lubrication, hygiene and a reasonable frequency of such practice. And do not get carried away with such intimacy more than two or three times a month – the muscles need to recover.

Already in the frying pan

A woman wriggling in his arms and literally hysterically reaching an orgasm in all conceivable and inconceivable positions – literally a classic porn story. The love of the stronger sex for such a scenario is associated with male self-esteem. Contrary to the stereotype, it is extremely important for a man to receive feedback from his partner. And of course, the stormy and most importantly, sincere reaction to his bedding skills is much more pleasant than the monotonous sounds coming from under five blankets in the dark.

The first, and perhaps the main reason for the unnatural behavior of many women in bed is complexes or attitudes coming from childhood (such as “a real lady should not enjoy sex”). Another obstacle is the inability to “turn off your head” and truly relax. With the first, independent work on oneself can help, and if the problem is serious (for example, psychotrauma), then a professional psychologist. You can learn to “turn off your head” with the help of special exercises. Try, for example, to develop your favorite erotic fantasies daily at the level of all sensations (auditory, visual, tactile, olfactory) and reconstruct them during intimacy with your loved one.

Men’s fantasy top

• Sex for two
  men with a woman takes first place in the ranking of men
  dreams. Such a fantasy has very deep psychological roots, and
  it is not surprising that this particular plot is a favorite topic of pornography.
  The main thing that prevents any man from having sex is the idea,
  that a woman will not have sex “just like that” – she should
  “persuade”.

This stereotype, which often has nothing to do with the real
life, very “slows down” male sexuality. And with the help of such
fantasy woman from the image of “impregnable rock” is transferred to the category
harlots. That is, having sex with two men, she, as it were,
becomes more “carnal”, and this, of course, improves intimate life
men. Therefore, if your partner fantasizes about this kind of sex,
he has difficulty in inviting a woman to intimacy, he is too
idealizes a partner, which means he is not inclined to behave in bed
liberated.

Tip:
to overcome this, you should not, of course, invite a “third person” to bed
best friend or stairwell neighbor. Just try
become more relaxed, do not pinch, and it will be easier for a man.

• Sex with two
  women –
  fantasy, which is in second place in terms of prevalence. How
  men think, if two women agree to have sex with you, then
  they appreciate you, you have sexual power, domineering character. That
  there is you for them – a super male, a super man both psychologically and
  physiologically.

Tip:
a man with such fantasies can be confident and sexy
hardy, in bed with him a woman may get a huge
pleasure.

• The third most common fantasy is a woman demonstrating
  their sexual organs. Even for an experienced man, they are often
  a complete mystery. But the way girls are “arranged” excites boys with
  childhood. But few women show their charms to a man, and
  in vain! After all, it not only excites, but also stimulates sexuality.

Tip:
Is a man who dreams of looking at you “in more detail” sure that
can give a woman pleasure? Yes, he takes care of his
partner and wants her to be completely satisfied! So don’t
feel free to show him your genitals, because if for a man this
will be a “forbidden fruit”, it is unlikely that your intimate life will be rich and
active.

• Sex with
  an unfamiliar woman is in fourth place. How
  as a rule, this is sex before meeting, immediately after meeting, or even instead
  dating, reminiscent of rape. By the way, the first episode
  pornographic postcards, released in mass circulation, was precisely on
  this topic. A man usually imagines that when he attacks
  woman, she is at first confused, indignant, but as he
  pierces her with a powerful member, excited. Yes, such a man is sure of
  himself, but he often does not pay much attention to foreplay!
  Why is that? It has long been known that the main female claim to intimate
  living with a man is not enough foreplay. 90% of men know this, but everyone
  equals “sack” Why? The fact is that male sexual fantasies
  developed in adolescence, when testosterone is raging with might and main. AND,
  Naturally, with such a riot of hormones, you won’t fantasize that
  caress a woman for half an hour. What if adolescence was
  long and fantasies have strengthened (and we have sex in
  according to them), becoming an adult, about foreplay somehow does not
  think especially. “Immediate sex” is therefore a “harmful fantasy”
  which greatly interferes with intimate life, if it is fixed and passes into
  reality.

Tip:
if a partner caresses you for exactly five minutes, ask if he
fantasizes about sex with a stranger? Is he confident? So why
wants his partner to be disappointed? This is one way
explain that fast sex does not mean quality. By the way,
it’s not bad to “play” rape once so that the fantasy finally
realized, and after that to engage in slow, sensual sex.

• Monitoring
  masturbating woman. This fantasy again reflects
  curiosity, but not to the structure of the genital organs, but to how it works
  female mechanism of satisfaction. Many men understand that women
  sensuality is very different from male, that it is much more
  complex. Still, the female body for a man is a mystery. That’s why
  looking at a woman masturbating is a way to satisfy your
  curiosity and learn how best to please your partner. Except
  Moreover, masturbation in front of a man is a symbol of trust in
  relationships. After all 90% of women find it easier to surrender to a man than to show him
  How is the process of masturbation!

Tip:
if a man asks you to masturbate in front of him, he won’t
pervert, but just wants to know how much you love him and appreciate him
wishes! Well, if for some reason this is unpleasant for you, think, maybe the connection
with this person is just an episode in your life and you are not so
you feel psychologically confident in order to show the most
intimate and intimate, what do you have in life?

• Sex in place
  where you might be caught, is an exhibitionist fantasy. She
  associated not so much with sex as with the desire to shock, quit
  challenge the public, express social protest against the restrictions.
  This fantasy is especially characteristic of teenagers or young people, but also
  also occurs in mature men. As a rule, this is a demonstration of
  sexual power, the ability to persuade a woman to have sex in any, even
  most inconvenient place.

Tip:
it is quite possible that such a man, although he considers himself very
attractive “macho”, really not too sexy skillful. Well
of course, it is not sex itself that is important for him, but the opportunity to once again experience
thrill. Spontaneous sex where you have to – it’s original, but
does the partner think about your feelings and desires, if he really
often and with stubbornness tries to take possession of you, now in the stairwell, now
in the cinema toilet?

• Sex in
  own boss’s office. Such a fantasy has
  little relation to sex. Often a man, dreaming about sex in the chief’s office with
  his secretary or wife, for example, dreams of rising above his
  chief. As a rule, such a man believes that the boss does not appreciate him and
  does not love. You have to somehow become “higher”, if you can not surpass
  chief by status and in the hierarchy! Peeping. Often male
  dreams of spying on a woman performing hygiene
  procedures. In general, everything related to “unintentional”, but sexual
  female movements, insanely excites a man. Why, for example, almost
  no one dreams of sexual intimacy with a stripper? Because,
  if a woman does something on purpose, knowing that she is being watched,
  becomes uninteresting.

Tip:
if a man spies on you in the bathroom, although you already live together
six months, don’t panic and don’t call 911. Your partner is not
voyeur and not a pervert. It’s just that he is insanely upset that in childhood he did not
could satisfy my interest in what it does in the bathroom
elder sister. Now it’s making up for lost time.

• Sex with
  virgin. Common youth fantasy.
  Firstly, for a man it is a way to assert himself.