Emotional relation: How To Build An Emotional Connection
How Important Is An Emotional Connection In A Relationship
How important is an emotional connection in a relationship? Everyone wants to feel loved by their partner, and forging an emotional bond is one of the most fundamental building blocks of a lasting relationship you will ever have. When you are emotionally connected as a couple, you build a foundation of strength, trust, and respect.
Having an emotional connection means you can go to your partner and share anything with them. It is the knowledge that both you and your partner have empathy for one another. Emotional bonds also have much to do with trust and security, knowing your partner will always be there for you no matter what the circumstances. It promotes forgiveness, engagement, and boosts morale.
If you maintain this connection your relationship will experience less emotional distance, emotional issues, and disruptions. Here are the benefits of an emotional connection between two loving partners.
The benefits of emotional connection in a relationship
How important is an emotional connect in a relationship? Very! An emotional connection can help bond you for the long-run. Here are just some of the benefits of creating an emotional connection with your partner.
- Better sexual connection: When you are emotionally connected your sex life is going to be out of this world, especially for women. Because an emotional connection creates a bond of trust and respect, it allows you to go wild between the sheets. Physical intimacy by way of sex and physical touch such as holding hands deepens romantic connections for both men and women.
- Builds respect: Knowing one another on an emotional level can help build a mutual respect that is essential for a long-term, healthy relationship. Showing respect is essential in healthy relationships. This means you value your partner, you consider their thoughts and feelings, and you respect them as a person, not just as your partner. Being shown respect helps you feel appreciated by your partner.
- You have amazing conversations together: Most of life is made up of polite, mundane, or silly conversations, and that’s fantastic. But how amazing is it to be able to share your life with someone you can have deep, meaningful conversation with? Sure, not all of your chats are going to end with a new outlook on life, but the possibility is always around the corner. Being emotionally in-tune means being able to talk about anything, from the very silly to the very thoughtful.
- You have excellent communication skills: There is nothing more frustrating than knowing how you feel and not being able to put it into words with your partner. When your relationship has a deep emotional connection, you are more in tune with one another’s wants and needs. You know how to communicate these to one another and equally as important, you know how to reciprocate.
- You create a bond of trust and security: Knowing that your partner is always going to be there for you is no small feat in a romantic relationship. When you know you can always rely on your partner your emotional bond grows even stronger. What’s more, if you ever find yourself in an argument together you don’t run scared. Instead, you are able to communicate clearly knowing that no matter what your partner is going to stand by you.
- It boosts your overall mood: When you are truly emotionally bonded with someone in an intimate relationship, your body releases the mood enhancing hormone called oxytocin. This hormone naturally enhances your sense of self-esteem, trust, optimism, and triggers the part of your brain that forms bonds. Oxytocin is also good for other aspects of your health. For example it boosts orgasm, lowers stress, improves gut motility, lowers blood pressure, reduces cortisol, and prompts faster healing.
- You have more fun together: When you are in a relationship with someone who understands you and connects with you on an intimate level, you will have more fun together.
How to increase your emotional connection
Emotional intimacy makes a relationship fun, secure, and surprising. Here are some key ways to increase your emotional connection with each other.
- Never stop talking: The most effective way to develop an emotional connection with your partner is by talking. Bonding over common interests, past experiences, and future goals is going to strengthen your relationship tenfold, especially if you know how to communicate with one another.
- Never stop dating: There is a quote that says “Never stop being your husband’s girlfriend”. Even if you have been married for many years now, you still want to be with that person you first fell in love with. Don’t stop dating and trying to woo your partner. Plan exciting date nights every week where you treat one another as you would if you were just first dating. This can lead to some not only naughty but also fun exploits together.
- Never stop having sex: Sex is a huge factor in remaining emotionally connected. Men experience love through sex and most women experience love after sex due to the orgasm induced release of the “love drug” known as oxytocin. Overall, having more sex is not only fun, but it forges a deeper bond between couples – especially when both experience orgasm.
- Never put off your issues: Never let your issues lay dormant. This can cause resentment to bloom and can poison your relationship. Also never assume that you can patch your relationship at a later date. When it comes to relationships, you get out of them what you put in. Treating your relationship like a priority will yield good results with a strong emotional connection while treating it like an option will lead down a bad path.
So, how important is an emotional connection in a relationship?
Building an emotional connection boosts the happiness and overall morale of you and your partner. You can work on maintaining your emotional connection by keeping communication open and never forgetting to put the other person first. If both parties follow this golden rule their relationship will have much to celebrate.
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Draven Porter is an esteemed relationship writer who delves deep into the complexities of human connection. With a background in psychology, Draven’s writing is known for its powerful insights and thoughtful analysis. When not Read more writing, Draven can be found exploring his passion for music and attending concerts. Draven’s unique perspective on relationships is rooted in his fascination with different cultures and he enjoys immersing himself in new experiences through travel and trying out exotic cuisines.
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15 Signs Of An Emotionally Connected Relationship
Emotional connection is a key factor that determines the foundation of healthy personal and intimate relationships. So, undoubtedly, it should be highly valued. However, even when we have everything else we need, a lack of emotional bonding and sentimentality can stand as a hurdle to joy and happiness in a relationship. If partners lose the emotional bond, a void is created that cannot be handled with expensive gifts or great gestures. Therefore, maintaining the connection emotionally is a major responsibility of both partners. The good news is you can always try building up the connection if you feel you are losing it. In this article, we have discussed some strategies to rebuild the lost emotional connection with your partner. Scroll down to know more about clear signs of an emotionally connected relationship.
In This Article
What Is An Emotional Connection?
Everyone has their own idea of what an emotional connection means to them. Typically, an emotional connection is characterized by the following:
- A feeling of intimacy that goes beyond physical attraction.
- The ability to connect with the other person on a deeper level.
- The ability to feel secure while connecting emotionally with the other person.
- A feeling of belonging and general well-being with the other person.
All in all, emotional connection is not about having superficial conversations or banking on surface-level similarities to keep the relationship going. It is about genuinely feeling a deep sense of attachment, respect, and care for the other person. As you can imagine, an intense emotional connection lays the foundation for long-term and real intimacy.
You must first establish an emotional bond with yourself before you can do the same with another person. This indicates that you have the ability to recognize and articulate your feelings, goals, and desires.
Related: Types Of Intimacy & Factors Within An Intimate Relationship
Now, let us understand the top tell-tale signs of two emotionally connected people.
Top 15 Signs That You Are Emotionally Connected To Your Partner
If you want to build a sustainable and happy relationship, being emotionally connected is key. Here are the signs of emotional connection:
1. You Both Genuinely Care For Each Other’s Needs, Wants, And Desires
One of the most defining characteristics of an emotional connection is when you want the best things in life for your partner. In other words, you genuinely feel happy when their life goals, dream goals, career goals, etc., get fulfilled.
2. You Support And Champion Each Other
When it comes to building a rock-solid emotional connection, genuine support is of utmost importance (1). This support can be physical, emotional, or mental, depending on the state of each individual.
3. You Engage In Honest And Open Conversations
Are you both regularly having honest conversations about the relationship and life in general, despite differing opinions? If so, you are in an emotionally sound relationship.
Related: 15 Signs Of An Emotionally Connected Relationship
4. You Re-Evaluate Your Relationship From Time To Time
Emotionally connected partners are often internalizing the relationship and figuring out where things can be better. There is little to no hesitation in truly speaking your mind.
5. You Actively Listen To Each Other
It is one thing to simply hear what the other person is saying and a whole different ball game altogether to engage in active listening. This includes:
- Creating a safe space for the partner to vent out and air their concerns without any fear of judgment or any kind of negativity.
- Genuinely being present and devoting your complete attention to what your partner is saying.
- Demonstrating active listening through eye contact and head nods.
6. You Know Each Other’s Ins And Outs
From knowing and accepting each other’s flaws to deeply understanding each other’s personality, emotionally connected people are aware of every little detail that makes up their partner. This includes knowing their fears, motivations, values, dreams, vulnerabilities, and insecurities.
7. You Voluntarily Participate In Each Other’s Hobbies
Partners with a strong emotional connection willingly go the extra mile to accommodate the other person’s interests and hobbies into their routine to spend more quality time together. The idea is to find ways to reconnect with the other person and build rapport, either through shared interests or differing hobbies.
8. You Liven Up The Relationship With Attention To Detail
If your relationship is more about celebrating the smaller joys of everyday life, it means that you are emotionally tuned into each other. You understand that it is the smaller things and gestures in life that bring about the maximum amount of joy. These small things could include:
- Cooking for each other
- Taking an interest in the mundane details of each other’s lives
- Taking care of each other when sick
- Surprising each other at work with date-night plans
All in all, if you both are invested in each other’s day-to-day life, it is a good sign.
9. You Are Not Focused On “Fixing” Each Other
Emotionally mature couples understand that they do not need to “fix” the other person or get into the problem-solving mode to eliminate issues. It is all about giving the other person healthy space to speak out and simply listen to their problems without judgment or being condescending.
10. You Are Sympathetic And Empathetic Towards Each Other
You may be on opposite poles of the spectrum mentally, but you both get where the other person is coming from. Understanding each other’s perspective is a healthy sign of emotionally connected couples and demonstrates true care and concern for the partner. Also, if both of you are putting in equal effort to make the relationship thrive, you have a strong emotional connection.
11. You Do Not Hide Your Quirks
If you can openly indulge in your most embarrassing and strange habits in front of your partner, congratulations – you are in an emotionally mature relationship as you can only do so if there is no fear of judgment or embarrassment.
12. You Are Each Other’s Priority
As mentioned earlier, a healthy emotional relationship is one where both people prioritize their partner’s needs without any sense of obligation or expectation. They are equally involved in making the relationship a success.
13. You Are Not In The Relationship Just For Sex
As hard as it may be to believe, in emotionally charged relationships, physical intimacy comes second to emotional connectedness. In other words, open and honest feelings contribute to the level of intimacy, not solely sexual attractiveness.
14. You Are Patient With Each Other
One of the ingredients of a strong emotional connection is patience. If you find that both of you routinely demonstrate patience, especially when the other partner is being difficult or irrational, it is a sign of emotional connection at its best.
15. You Share Plenty Of Non-Sexual Intimate Moments
Do you find yourself completing each other’s sentences? Do you notice how there is a sixth-sense at play when your partner orders in your favorite pastry just when you were silently craving one? Do you find yourselves laughing at jokes that seemingly no one else seems to get? These are just some examples of non-sexual intimacy that makes emotional relationships fun and rewarding.
Now that you understand what the signs of emotional connection are, let us see why an emotional connection is so significant in the first place.
Why Is An Emotional Connection Important In A Relationship?
An emotional connection helps couples feel secure in their relationship. Some of the major benefits that emotionally connected partners enjoy are:
- They have a greater sense of trust, transparency, and emotional closeness
- They feel truly heard, seen, and – more importantly – accepted by their significant other.
- They are able to effortlessly engage in honest and fulfilling communication.
- They are able to identify and accept each other’s emotions, flaws, needs, mistakes, and desires easily.
- They are more mindful of their actions and not quick to judge or over-react.
- They truly value and respect each other.
- They are less prone to drifting apart, even when the going gets extra tough.
- They are in tune with their partner’s needs and, at the same time, self-aware of their own needs and shortcomings.
Having an emotional connection acts as the steering wheel that can help you navigate your relationship. So, how can you connect with your partner emotionally? Read on to find out.
How To Connect With Your Partner Emotionally
It goes without saying that having an emotional connection brings more joy and peace into the couple’s lives. Here are some tried-and-tested tips that can help you connect with your partner emotionally:
- Greet your partner with a smile in the morning and before going to bed.
- Express your love through small gestures peppered throughout the day (2). Hug them randomly, thank them for being themselves while watching TV at night, kiss their hand as they serve you dinner, bring them flowers for no reason at all, and so on.
- Hug your partner when you return home at the end of the day.
- Send a long, heartfelt text for no reason.
- Acknowledge it when you are being reactive and put it into everyday practice.
- Express your remorse and apologize from the heart.
- If you are being unnecessarily defensive and have realized it during the fight, say it out loud and accept it in front of your partner.
- Do not let ego get in the way and allow the emotional cold war to last longer than necessary.
- Think of your relationship as ever-evolving and dynamic so that the fights and blows do not end up leaving a long-lasting dent.
- Continue to pay attention to your partner and try to imbibe good virtues from them.
- Focus on establishing trust via small gestures, open conversations, and gentle mindfulness towards the relationship.
- Instead of putting unpleasantries and issues on the back burner, take charge and initiate a solution to demonstrate emotional maturity.
- Resolve conflicts and grievances with a cool head and sound logic.
- Do not engage in any kind of blame games or judgment.
- Look for ways to demonstrate compassion and empathy.
- Be willing to show your vulnerabilities and let your guard down to facilitate a deeper sense of understanding and empathy.
- Study your partner and understand what their life goals are.
- Try to be as emotionally available to your partner as needed, even if it is often.
- Show affection and understanding by giving each other space.
- Fight fair and try not to cross a line during a heated argument.
- Try to truly understand the other person’s perspective by putting yourself in their shoes.
- Do not bring up past issues that have been resolved again and again. It is best to leave the past in the past.
- Understand that building an emotional connection does not happen overnight. Rather, it is a complex and subjective matter that requires a lot of effort and dedication from both parties involved.
Take a step back and understand the intricacies of your partner’s behavior. Try to be in their shoes as this gives an insight into how their mind works. This will help you get to know them at a deeper level and build stronger ties.
Note that there is no standard formula or template that you can follow, as an emotional connection should happen organically and intuitively. However, you can follow the ideas and tips suggested above to trust your gut and move ahead in the right direction. As long as the initiative and effort are not forced, you are golden.
Related: 121 Relationship Trust Quotes To Strengthen Your Bond
An emotional connection is the foundation stone of any relationship. If you do not feel connected to a person, any amount of gestures or gifts cannot fill that void. Therefore, you must be emotionally connected to your partner and care for them on a deeper level. Some signs of such a fulfilling relationship are that both partners support each other, listen, do things together, and are each other’s priority. Having such a relationship can help you feel accepted, have a sense of self-confidence, and enjoy a secure bond.
Frequently Asked Questions
How to make a man emotionally attached to you?
When it comes to building a strong and healthy relationship, it’s important to create a sense of emotional security for your partner. Start by accepting and supporting him for who he is, while also encouraging open communication and vulnerability. Show him love and care, and give him the space he needs to feel comfortable being himself. With time and effort, your partner may naturally become more emotionally attached to you as he feels more secure and supported in the relationship.
What creates an emotional connection?
An emotional connection with someone is founded upon trust and love. These critical elements serve to unite people and fortify relationships, creating a strong sense of emotional attachment that can last indefinitely.
What are some barriers to emotional connection in a relationship?
Lack of communication, emotional baggage, differences in attachment styles, lack of trust or intimacy, and work or financial pressures are some common barriers to an emotional connection.
Can a lack of emotional connection lead to relationship problems?
Yes, a lack of emotional connection can lead to partners feeling distant, unloved, or unsupported. This can lead to feelings of loneliness, resentment, or dissatisfaction.
What role does communication play in building emotional connection?
Effective communication is key to building an emotional connection as it helps partners understand each other’s thoughts, feelings, and needs. Communication creates a safe space for emotional expression and helps partners work through conflicts and misunderstandings, deepening their understanding, love, and appreciation of each other.
Can couples therapy help strengthen their emotional connection in a relationship?
Yes, a therapist may assist in identifying and removing obstacles to emotional connection, enhancing communication abilities, and offering strategies to increase intimacy and trust. Therapy can also give partners a secure and encouraging atmosphere to communicate their needs and wants, resolve problems, and forge closer emotional ties.
What are some common misconceptions about emotional connection in relationships?
One common misconception is that an emotional connection comes naturally and requires no work. Maintaining an emotional connection requires constant effort. Another misconception is that establishing an emotional bond simply depends on sex or physical attractiveness. In contrast, the emotional connection goes beyond physical attraction and entails a far deeper level of emotional intimacy.
Can emotional connection be re-established after it has been lost in a relationship?
Yes, it requires both partners to be willing to put in the effort to improve communication, address underlying issues, and rebuild trust. With patience, empathy, and a commitment to working through obstacles, partners can rekindle their emotional connection and deepen their relationship.
- Lack of emotional connection and support ruins the happiness in a relationship.
- Both partners should work towards building an emotional connection.
- If you are emotionally connected, you feel a deep sense of attachment, respect, and care for the other person.
- Such a connection helps you navigate your relationship.
Articles on StyleCraze are backed by verified information from peer-reviewed and academic research papers, reputed organizations, research institutions, and medical associations to ensure accuracy and relevance. Read our editorial policy to learn more.
- Attachment theory and emotions in close relationships: Exploring the attachment-related dynamics of emotional reactions to relational events
- Expression and Regulation of Emotions in Romantic Relationships
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Peculiarities of children’s emotional attitude to their works in fine arts
The author considers the development of the emotional sphere of a preschooler as the basis for the formation of an emotionally expressive image in the drawings of children of senior preschool age. As a type of visual activity, the drawing of a preschool child develops as the child himself develops and forms, as his general psychological development takes place. Affective processes are closely intertwined in visual activity. It is noted that drawing as a product of visual activity reflects the child’s idea of the environment and emotional attitude to the world. “The emotional factor is of great importance for the quality of a child’s drawing.”
Keywords : emotions, creativity, aesthetic thinking, emotional sphere, emotional experiences, personality development.
The author examines the development of the emotional sphere as a preschooler basis for the formation of emotional and expressive image in drawings of children of preschool age. As a kind of graphic activity, preschooler painting evolved as developed and formed the child, how is it common psychological development. The graphic activity is closely intertwined affective processes. It is noted that the drawing as a product of graphic activity reflects a representation of the child about the environment and emotional attitude to the world. “The emotional factor is of great importance to the quality of children’s drawings”.
Keywords: emotions, creativity, aesthetic thinking, emotional sphere, emotional distress, personal development.
As N. P. Sakulina notes, “from the elementary clarity of the image, the preschooler goes to the search for attractiveness. The peculiarity of children’s drawing is that, relatively slowly mastering the methods of drawing, the child tends to replace the expressiveness of the image.
In preschoolers with high emotionality, an emotional reaction can be elicited faster. The verbal attitude to images in these children is concrete and figurative. A child’s bad mood or well-being makes it difficult for the child to develop emotions, interest and maintain them throughout the lesson.
Revealing the peculiarities of the emotional attitude of children to their work was the task of our study. The reaction of children to the proposed topic depends on the individual characteristics of the psyche, on temperament, general mood and well-being, and the level of mastery of the drawing technique. To understand these features in more detail, we conducted a study (2010–2016) in one of the kindergartens in the city of Dolgoprudny near Moscow, namely: “.
The formative experiment included several stages.
We assume that children will be able to display the emotional state of a person: joy, delight, sadness, anger, fear, surprise, and create an emotionally expressive image on their basis in drawings under the following conditions: a variety of sketches; works of the availability of various visual materials games with emotional content.
At the first lesson , the tasks were solved to identify the features of the emotional and aesthetic perception of the image of a person, acquaintance with the portrait genre in fine art, familiarizing children with the language of emotions in drawing, in which they can draw a portrait of a person. Reproductions of portrait painters were used, when examining which attention was drawn to how the artist depicted a person: in profile or full face. Focusing on the “soul” of the portrait, can you see the mood of a person, his character, what means of expression the artist uses; analysis of color, facial expressions and pantomimics of the most traced details was made. The children were asked to remember pictures of the portrait genre and try to describe them. Emotional and aesthetic perception in verbal terms was recorded by us in the form of children’s statements. For example, Zhenya S. girl Alyonushka is sad, she will probably cry now. This is due to the fact that her brother turned into a goat. Kristina P. Alyonushka is also sad because she got into a terrible swamp, in the middle of the forest. Zhenya B. is a very cheerful girl, she smiles and has beautiful cheeks. And she is very well located, as if resting in a chair. For a more complete description of the heroine of the portrait, we asked her to recall the story of the fairy tale about sister Alyonushka and brother Ivanushka. In the classroom, we used a full display with an explanation of the features of the image. The lesson began with a heuristic conversation, in the course of the explanation we used the technique of “mental” entry into the portrait.
Based on the results of the first lesson, the following can be determined: the children adequately perceived the portraits of people on the reproductions of the artists, were able to tell about the peculiarities of their character and feelings. The children were able to see how the artists displayed spiritual qualities using such expressive means as color, facial expressions, static position and detail drawing.
At the second lesson we continued to form the emotional and aesthetic perception of portraits, to instill in children an interest in the profession of a portrait painter. The task of the second lesson was to give children knowledge about the variety of occupations in the profession of an artist, that he can depict paintings of different genres. As well as the perception of the character of Boyarina Morozova and other heroes of the painting by V. Surikov.
When considering the reproduction as a whole and individual features in these paintings, we used the story, an example of the teacher’s personal attitude to the picture they liked, where we drew the children’s attention to how the artist technically portrayed people using colors, who he depicted in the center of the group portrait, in what position showing people: static or dynamic. But mostly the emphasis was on the different emotional states of the depicted: Boyarina Morozova depicts a proud and courageous character, “burning eyes” and a “hard look”; the poor beggar laughs and gloats; the rest of the episodic personalities, men and women, cry, favor her, on their faces sorrow and hatred for the enemies of the noblewoman. Individual children were asked to describe the character of the people in the reproduction being described, to play their roles and then to depict the emotions of some characters themselves, imagining themselves as them, using their own facial expressions and pantomime, to evaluate them. The children liked this technique, and they completed this task very creatively. In the course of the lesson, we used the method of precise settings for a more logical explanation to children, the method of personal formation, personal attitude to painting, dissected questions, to which the children gave a clear and precise answer.
Based on the results of the lesson, we found that most children correctly perceive the emotions and character of the participants in a group portrait, although these characters are not only positive in the plot of the picture. The following statements of children were recorded: Alesya B.: “The boyar is very brave, because the old man, although he laughs, is still afraid of her.” Andrey R.: “I feel sorry for the Boyarynya, because people are crying a lot because she is leaving. But the old man is not sorry, although he is poor, he is evil. We saw that children adequately perceive the emotional state of joy, fear, sadness of the characters in the picture. Coming up with expressive images, older preschoolers experience minor difficulties in the theatrical transmission of pantomime and facial expressions of the characters in the plot of the picture.
At the third lesson we consolidated in children the abilities of emotional and aesthetic perception of the human image; display it in a drawing. The children were given the task to depict portraits of people, heroes of the plot of the picture, which the children considered earlier (V. Surikov “Boyar Morozova”). At the same time, the children repeated the emotional characteristics of these images. This contributes not only to the development of aesthetic perception, imagination, the formation of figurative representations, but also to children’s mastery of a variety of visual material, various generalized ways of depiction, which make it possible to convey a wide range of phenomena and objects in a drawing. We also recalled the means of expression that V. I. Surikov used when creating his picture. In order to help the children in this, they were offered sketches of the images of the artist’s people for the picture. This made it possible to perceive human images not in a group, but separately, each in order to better understand his emotional image. The children became more interested and activated the activity of the imagination.
We found in the third lesson that each child’s playing out the emotional state of each character in the plot of the picture in the previous lesson, and the use of a diverse and more accurate visual material, allowed the children to arouse a steady interest in the proposed topic. Preschoolers more or less well conveyed the character of people in the drawing, the color scheme, but the technique of depicting a person indicates its special formation.
Features of the emotional attitude to the images of people in drawing in older preschoolers are associated with the temperament of children:
More impulsive children sometimes completed the drawing 5 minutes after the start of work – they were in a hurry to translate the idea on paper, often not completing the drawing to the end when depicting individual images without creating a general composition. Very often, the nature of the drawings of these children was of an affective nature: the drawing technique was not observed (curved lines, non-compliance with proportions) and the expression on the faces of human images was lifeless.
Children with a balanced temperament performed the drawings more carefully, paying attention to all elements of the composition of the drawing. Their image technique is more correct than that of the above children: the lines are quite straight, facial features are more distinct, proportional parts of the body, but facial expressions are poorly drawn.
Children with a high level effortlessly portrayed a person as technically correct, but also had a good command of the language of emotions. They instilled emotions in the image, thereby enlivening them.
In the classroom, a psychological peculiarity appeared – there is a difference between the male and female image. We choose a man or a woman. Boys tend to draw a male person, and girls, on the contrary. This indicator indicates normal sexual development, since a preschool child has a sexual orientation at this age only to his own sex.
Children just as well conveyed their attitude towards people with the help of facial expressions, facial features and body proportions, color and background, embellished the image they liked. So the mother, the children depicted with big eyes, arched eyebrows, with a smiling mouth, long wavy hair, using colors of a warm spectrum. And the children depicted Baba Yaga with shaggy, dark green hair, drawing her with a huge wart on her nose.
When drawing a girl – a beautiful girl, the girls focused their attention on drawing a costume, although before starting work they were given an orientation to the image of a person, and not to drawing the details of clothing.
In the classroom, the children were more willing to perform tasks of a creative nature, where they were asked to choose the image of a person for the image.
In our work, we have identified: it is possible to form the emotional attitude of children to their work when creating effective pedagogical conditions through three stages: the stage of emotional and aesthetic perception of the portrait; the stage of the formation of a feeling of empathy, the identification of an emotional response to the image of a person depicted by them; the stage of formation of the use of technology. Mastering the language of emotions, the ability to live the emotions of the character, the child creates a harmonious expressive image, which is far from abstraction and close to reality, the creation of one’s own kind, “alive”, which means emotional. Children are able to open their emotional attitude. In the course of this experiment, we conducted a lesson, its tasks were: to identify individual levels of formation of an emotional attitude. At the lesson, it was proposed to recall the reproductions of artists, illustrations for stories and fairy tales (which we drew during several lessons). Also, the children were asked to remember those portraits of people that preschoolers had already depicted earlier in the classroom to enhance the activity of the imagination, refresh the memory of children. During the lesson, we saw that most of the children learned to understand the language of emotions, apply it in drawings and use the learned methods and techniques of drawing techniques. The knowledge and experience gained by children in the classroom led to an increase in their individual levels of formation, mastering the technique of depicting these images.
- Belikova M. Aesthetic perception of children in visual activities. Preschool education, 1981 No. 4, p. 27.
- Blashchuk L. A. Formation of interest in visual activity in children aged 5–7 years in the classroom in kindergarten. Dissertation M., 1985.
- Vygotsky L. S. Imagination and creativity in childhood. M. Education, 1991, p. 9–11, p. 13–14.
- Denisova ZV Children’s drawing in physiological interpretation. L., Nauka, 1974, p. 140.
- Ezikeeva V. A. The content and methods of teaching visual activity of children 4–7 years old. Aesthetic education in kindergarten, M., Education, 1985.
- Izard Carroll E., Human Emotions (translated from English) M., Ed. Moscow University, 1980, p. 21, p. 201–206.
- T. Komarova, Visual Activities in Kindergartens: Education and Creativity. Moscow: Pedagogy, 2000
- Komarova T. S. Children in the world of creativity M., education, 1992, p. 23.
- Komarova T. S. Visual activity teaching children technical skills and abilities.
- Kosminskaya V. B. Khalizova N. B., Fundamentals of fine arts and methods of directing the visual activity of children M., Enlightenment,
- Sakulina N. P. Drawing in preschool childhood M., Education, 1965. p. 107, 80-81, 120-121, 152-154, 192-194.
- Sakulina N. P., Komarova T. S. Visual activity in kindergarten M., Enlightenment, 1982.
- Flerina E. A. The development of children’s fine arts under the influence of educational guidance. Proceedings of the All-Russian scientific conference on preschool education. M., 1949.
Basic terms (automatically generated) : child, occupation, emotional attitude, visual activity, image, drawing, language of emotions, verbal plan, group portrait, color scheme.
Love or emotional dependence?
- Author: Butsovska Tetyana
- Category: International problems
Emotional dependence is dependence on a relationship with another person. it forces a person to give up their interests, important needs and life values. Emotional dependence can be very difficult to recognize, as its presence is often confused with strong love feelings. Many people live in unsatisfactory, destructive relationships, believing that this is how it should be “Suffering means love” – and not understanding what could be different.
Love is not suffering and torment, but the union of two mature people who feel good and comfortable together and who do not collapse in interaction with each other. They do not need to control their partner, or defend against him, or manipulate, or “fix” or save. And they can realize themselves, make independent decisions, while maintaining the self-respect of everyone. Love does not prevent a person from realizing his potential, from loving, in addition to a partner, the whole world and himself as a part of it. A loving person seeks to create, and not to sacrifice himself, to engage in dialogue, and not to obey.
Signs of emotional dependence:
1. Deep preoccupation with another person, constant need for his presence, attention, approval.
2. Lack of personal autonomy, love, friendship are impossible without complete dissolution in each other, without complete surrender of life at the disposal of another person;
3. Relationships become destructive, accompanied by intense jealousy, numerous difficult conflicts, constant threat of a break, but it does not reach a real, final break;
4. It’s hard in a relationship, it’s impossible without a relationship – “I can’t live with you, but I can’t live without you either”;
5. Absence of relationship, object of love/affection or the thought of absence causes severe pain, fear, depression, apathy, despair;
6. Relationships cannot be broken off on their own: “Until he leaves me himself, we will not be able to part.”
Relationships in which there is emotional dependence are always very tense, conflicting, difficult relationships.
The development of a tendency to emotional (and any other) dependence occurs during infancy, from one month to one and a half years. An important task that must be solved during this period is to satisfy the child’s need for security, nutrition, bodily comfort, communication, acceptance, love. If in a person’s childhood experience there were separations from parents, a lack of attention and care, for one reason or another these needs were not satisfied – the experience of attachment becomes especially terrible for him.
Thus, an addicted person is in constant search of an “ideal parent”, a person who would compensate him for what he once did not get: unconditional love, unconditional acceptance, reading his needs without saying them out loud, immediate satisfaction of his needs – and sated would his love. Regain the hope that someday someone will love us so much that they will understand everything we want and do it for us, will be with us all the time and will always be within reach for contact, will guess our thoughts and desires. But in reality this is not possible. … But we unconsciously try to recreate the situation of separation from the mother, but already in adult life this is often played out with a marriage partner, so as to feel our integrity and freedom, to survive separation (separation) sometimes through parting with a partner.
Steps to recovery
Emotional dependence is not good and unpleasant because our well-being, our spiritual comfort and feeling of happiness, it turns out, depend on another person. While the master of our lives – ideally – should be ourselves. What needs to be done to get out of this unhealthy state?
First, recognize the problem and see examples of emotional dependence in your own life. To understand what your parents could not give you in childhood, what is your deficit (after all, this is what you are now trying to get with the help of other people).
Secondly, learn to take responsibility for your life on yourself, and not blame other people for your misfortunes and experiences. Don’t wait for someone to read your mind, guess your desires, tell you how to be, or change something in your life. You can assume that they will help you, but you need to rely primarily on yourself. Do not do for other people what they can do for themselves. Don’t hesitate to solve other people’s problems. Whatever you want to do for another person, do it for yourself first. Understand that we are not omnipotent. Most of the world around us is beyond our control. We cannot control anyone but ourselves.
Thirdly, deepen your contact with yourself: be aware of your values, your own goals, needs, desires, dreams. Don’t beat yourself up for mistakes. Learn to love, praise, approve and accept yourself with all your weaknesses, imperfections, fears.
Learn to analyze your behavior, recognize your own needs and desires and find ways to satisfy them outside your partner. Getting love and support is possible not only from one person. The more sources of their receipt, the less burden falls on the partner. The more a person is independent in meeting his needs, the less he depends on another person.
Fourth, work on raising your self-esteem and building your self-confidence. Learn to stop intrusions into your personal space. Don’t give in if they try to instill guilt in you or treat you badly. Work with emotional dependence should be constantly aimed at distinguishing yourself from another person: “Here I am, and here he is. Here we are similar, but here we are different. I can have my feelings, my desires, and he can have his, and this is not a threat to our intimacy. We don’t have to give up relationship, contact, to satisfy our various desires.” Learn to face the fact that other people cannot be around you all the time, cannot recognize without words what you want or do not want, cannot express their love all the time.
Fifth, at a deeper level, you need to regain the ability to feel vulnerability and affection, to experience the need for intimacy and rejection. You can call this part the “inner child”, which is forced to hide in the depths of our unconscious. His release is a long process. It must involve the mature parts of our psyche. To achieve this, most likely, it will be necessary to work through the consequences of a psychological trauma or a series of traumas. Read more about this in my article Healing the Inner Child.
Finally, it is important to learn constructive ways of interacting with a partner. Technically, they are very simple, much simpler than various manipulations and provocations of the addict. But psychologically, they require all the abilities and skills described above: to accept yourself and the other, to endure reality, its discrepancy with our expectations and your own emotions, to accept and share responsibility. And at the same time, stay in touch with your vulnerable part. In addition, in order to build close relationships, it is very important to want it, work on yourself and be ready for difficulties.
What do you choose: love or addiction?
Of course, sometimes relationships turn out to be connected with nothing but dependence, and freeing themselves from it, partners notice with fear that they are strangers to each other.