How can specific sexual techniques enhance female pleasure. What are the four key methods identified by researchers for optimizing sexual arousal. Why is having a vocabulary for sexual techniques important for women’s empowerment.

The Science Behind Female Sexual Pleasure: Groundbreaking Research Insights

A recent international qualitative study conducted by researchers Devon J. Hensel, PhD, and Christiana von Hippel, ScD, has shed new light on the specific techniques that enhance female sexual pleasure. Their research, which involved a cross-sectional online survey of 3,017 American women aged 18-93, identified four distinct methods that women commonly use to maximize their arousal and satisfaction during sexual encounters.

These findings are significant because they provide a vocabulary for techniques that women have long used but struggled to articulate. By naming and describing these methods, the researchers have empowered women to better communicate their preferences and needs to their partners, potentially leading to more fulfilling sexual experiences.

The Fab Four: Key Techniques for Enhancing Female Sexual Arousal

The study identified four primary techniques that women employ to optimize their pleasure during sexual activities:

1. Angling (87% of respondents)
2. Pairing (69% of respondents)
3. Rocking (76% of respondents)
4. Shallowing (84% of respondents)

Each of these techniques offers a unique approach to stimulation and arousal. Let’s explore them in more detail:

Angling: Precision in Positioning

Angling involves the strategic movement of the pelvis and hips during penetration. By rotating, raising, or lowering their hips, women can adjust where inside the vagina a penis or sex toy makes contact. This technique allows for targeted stimulation of sensitive areas, potentially enhancing pleasure and increasing the likelihood of orgasm.

Pairing: The Power of Dual Stimulation

Pairing refers to the simultaneous stimulation of the clitoris during penetration. This can be achieved either by the woman herself or her partner, using fingers or a sex toy. The combination of internal and external stimulation can lead to more intense sensations and potentially more powerful orgasms.

Rocking: Sustained Clitoral Contact

The rocking technique involves maintaining constant contact between the base of the penis or sex toy and the clitoris during penetration. Instead of traditional in-and-out thrusting, the penis or toy remains fully inserted while the partners rock together. This method is often employed when the woman is on top, allowing her to control the angle and pressure of stimulation.

One study participant noted the effectiveness of this technique, stating, “We had to ‘unlearn’ the fast-pumping motions we had seen in porn. And we’re both much happier with our new ways.”

Shallowing: Focusing on the Vaginal Entrance

Shallowing involves penetrative touch concentrated just inside the entrance of the vagina. This technique recognizes the sensitivity of this often-overlooked area. As one respondent explained, “I think this area is really underrated. I can have really amazing sex with penetration just going in an inch and never further.”

The Importance of Sexual Vocabulary: Empowering Women Through Language

Dr. von Hippel emphasizes the significance of having specific terms for these techniques: “I think naming pleasure and pleasure techniques are specifically empowering and usable, so women can feel comfortable and confident using them with partners.”

This newfound vocabulary serves multiple purposes:

• Facilitates open communication between partners
• Enables women to discuss sexual preferences with friends
• Normalizes diverse sexual preferences
• Allows for flexibility in expressing changing desires

By providing a “menu” of terms and techniques, women can more easily articulate their needs and preferences, leading to more satisfying sexual experiences.

Breaking New Ground: Advancing Sexual Education for Women

The publication of this research represents a significant step forward in sexual education for women. Lou Paget, a certified sex educator, welcomed the study, exclaiming, “Finally! It’s about time!”

Paget notes that while women have long been aware of these techniques, there has been a lack of formal guidance on how to implement them. This gap in knowledge stems from the historical focus of research on male sexual response and penile-vaginal intercourse.

The introduction of this new vocabulary not only benefits heterosexual couples but also same-sex female partners who may have previously lacked the language to communicate their needs effectively.

Enhancing Mutual Pleasure: How Partners Can Benefit from This Knowledge

The impact of this research extends beyond female pleasure. Paget points out that many male partners are eager to learn how to enhance their partner’s sexual experience. “Men are so hungry for what they can do to make a partner feel good. They enjoy it more if she enjoys it more,” she explains.

By providing a clear vocabulary for these techniques, partners of all genders can more easily discuss and explore ways to maximize mutual pleasure. This shared understanding can lead to more satisfying and intimate sexual experiences for both parties.

The Clitoris: A Central Player in Female Sexual Pleasure

A common thread among all four techniques identified in the study is their connection to clitoral stimulation. This finding aligns with existing knowledge about female sexual anatomy and response.

How does clitoral stimulation contribute to female sexual pleasure? The clitoris is a highly innervated organ with thousands of nerve endings, making it extremely sensitive to touch and pressure. When stimulated, it can produce intense sensations of pleasure and is often crucial for achieving orgasm.

While vaginal penetration can be enjoyable for many women, providing a sense of fullness and connection with a partner, it’s often the concurrent stimulation of the clitoris that leads to the most satisfying experiences. The techniques identified in this study – angling, pairing, rocking, and shallowing – all incorporate some form of clitoral stimulation, either directly or indirectly.

Practical Applications: Incorporating These Techniques into Sexual Experiences

Armed with this new knowledge, how can individuals and couples integrate these techniques into their sexual repertoire? Here are some practical suggestions:

• Experiment with different angles during penetration to find the most pleasurable sensations
• Incorporate clitoral stimulation during intercourse, either manually or with a sex toy
• Try the rocking technique, focusing on sustained contact rather than thrusting
• Explore the sensitivity of the vaginal entrance through gentle, shallow penetration
• Communicate openly with partners about preferences and sensations
• Be willing to adjust and adapt techniques based on feedback and changing desires

Remember, sexual preferences can vary greatly between individuals and even change over time for the same person. The key is to maintain open communication and a willingness to explore and adapt.

Beyond Technique: The Role of Communication in Sexual Satisfaction

While specific sexual techniques are important, effective communication remains a cornerstone of satisfying sexual experiences. How can partners improve their sexual communication?

• Create a safe, non-judgmental space for discussing sexual preferences
• Use “I” statements to express desires and feedback
• Practice active listening when a partner shares their needs
• Be open to trying new things and providing honest feedback
• Regularly check in about sexual satisfaction and any desired changes

By combining effective communication with an understanding of these newly identified techniques, couples can work together to create more fulfilling and enjoyable sexual experiences.

The Future of Sexual Research: What’s Next?

This groundbreaking study opens up new avenues for future research in the field of human sexuality. What areas might researchers explore next?

• The physiological mechanisms behind the effectiveness of these techniques
• Cultural variations in preferred sexual techniques
• The impact of age, relationship status, and sexual orientation on technique preferences
• Development of educational programs incorporating these findings
• Long-term effects of improved sexual communication on relationship satisfaction

As our understanding of human sexuality continues to evolve, studies like this one play a crucial role in dispelling myths, promoting open communication, and enhancing sexual satisfaction for individuals of all genders and orientations.

By providing a vocabulary for these common yet previously unnamed techniques, researchers have taken a significant step toward empowering women to articulate their sexual needs and preferences. This knowledge, combined with open communication and a willingness to explore, can lead to more satisfying sexual experiences for all involved parties.

As we continue to advance our understanding of human sexuality, it’s clear that the key to optimal sexual pleasure lies not just in physical technique, but in the power of knowledge, communication, and mutual exploration. By embracing these principles, individuals and couples can work together to create sexual experiences that are both deeply satisfying and intimately connecting.

Sexual Technique Terms Help Optimize Sexual Pleasure

Four Ways to Achieve Heightened Sexual Arousal

After analyzing the results from an international qualitative study, the researchers, Devon J. Hensel, PhD, an associate research professor at Indiana University School of Medicine in Indianapolis, and Christiana von Hippel, ScD, an OMGYES research scientist, found a recurring pattern of four specific techniques that never really had words to describe them before. The team then looked closer into these four techniques using a cross-sectional, online, national probability survey of 3,017 American women ages 18–93.

“We took this deeper dive into the patterns to find out the percentage of women who used each technique during vaginal penetration and then looked at how those specific techniques impacted their pleasure,” says Dr. von Hippel. In other words, they looked at the specific sexual moves and methods that turned them on.

RELATED: Women and Orgasm: Facts About the Female Climax

The researchers gave terms for each of these sexual methods to help women identify and communicate what feels best to them.

• Angling Rotating, raising, or lowering pelvis and hips during penetration to adjust where inside the vagina the toy or penis rubs; 87 percent of respondents used this method.
• Pairing A woman or her partner stimulates her clitoris with a finger or sex toy simultaneously with penetration. (69 percent)
• Rocking The base of a penis or sex toy rubs against the clitoris constantly during penetration by staying all the way inside the vagina rather than thrusting in and out. Usually used when the woman is on top. One of the respondents explained its allure: “We had to ‘unlearn’ the fast-pumping motions we had seen in porn. And we’re both much happier with our new ways.” (76 percent)
• Shallowing Penetrative touch just inside the entrance of the vagina. Another respondent said, “I think this area is really underrated. I can have really amazing sex with penetration just going in an inch and never further. ” (84 percent)

Using Language for Sexual Techniques Is Powerful

“I think naming pleasure and pleasure techniques are specifically empowering and usable, so women can feel comfortable and confident using them with partners. They are also important for when women discuss their sex lives with friends, such as ‘I like this, why don’t you try that?’ To be able to specifically describe what they like and to be able to ask for it is incredibly empowering and helps women to feel like their voices are heard. There is also a normalizing effect as well when they realize that what they like is a pattern that’s shared by lots of women,” says von Hippel.

RELATED: Masturbation 101: A Guide to Solo Sex for Women 

Dr. von Hippel adds that having language also allows women to be flexible and describe what they want at the moment. “What you enjoy can change in the middle of a sexual experience, and it can change over your life. Having this large menu or repertoire of words and techniques that you can pull from is great, because then it’s also not a question of “I am a woman who likes x.’ It might be ‘I am a woman who loves pairing in this context and shallowing in this context and angling at this age.’ Women can feel confident to communicate and mix and match.”

A Step Forward in Sexual Pleasure Education for Women

When Lou Paget, an American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists certified sex educator, heard of this new study her first response was, “Finally! It’s about time!”

Paget went on to explain, “I have been hearing women describe this stuff in my seminars for years but there really hasn’t been any guidance on how you do it. The main reason for that is because so much of the research work has always focused on the penile, vaginal, and men’s response.”

RELATED: BDSM: Learn the Ropes Before Diving In

Even if both partners are female, the two of them may not have had the language to communicate needs to each other. These words open that door.

Partners Can Learn About Pleasuring Others, Too

Paget also points out that the top question most men ask her is: How can he make things more pleasurable for his partner? “Men are so hungry for what they can do to make a partner feel good. They enjoy it more if she enjoys it more. Having language that can quickly describe what she likes is empowering to them as well,” says Paget, who is also the author of five books on sexuality, including Orgasms.

Clitoral Stimulation Is Key

Paget notes that all four techniques are connected to stimulating the clitoris at the same time. “This should not be any shock to any woman. For most, it isn’t the vaginal penetration that’s the most satisfying. That may feel good for feeling filled and connected to a partner. But it’s the shallowing, the rocking; those are all things that women have been doing for forever, that really bring women extreme pleasure,” she points out.

Again, this is important for men to know as well. “They have been fed misinformation from society at large and from watching unrealistic porn, where the women are usually deriving all their pleasure from penetration. Men need to learn the importance of clitoral stimulation as well,” she adds.

Achieving Female Orgasm: Tips for Partners

Experiment With Sex Toys That Work With Specific Techniques

When you figure out what you like, sex toys can help you get there either alone or with a partner. Tatyana Dyachenko, a sex coach with the online sex shop Peaches and Screams, reveals what types of toys work best with each technique.

For angling Sex swings allow the woman to rotate, raise, or lower her pelvis on the penetration item to allow for maximum pleasure.

For pairing A silicone mini finger vibrator stimulates your clitoris during penetration; a strap-on face dildo allows your partner to penetrate you while also using their tongue to stimulate the clitoris.

For rocking A raised ribbed “cock” sleeve with a clitoral stimulator and vibrator works for both parties: It helps thicken and support the penis for more firm erections, and the female partner can rub herself against the clitoral stimulator while being penetrated. Or, a vibrating clitoral stimulator delivers direct stimulation.

For shallowing Vibrating balls or eggs are inserted just inside the vagina without the need for deep penetration.

RELATED: Check Out Our Reviews of the Best Sex Toys for Individuals and Couples

More Research on Sexual Pleasure Is Needed

This survey did not ask women’s partners for feedback, which the team hopes to look at in the future. Von Hippel says, “What’s often really interesting is how the communication happens, how the names of the techniques are used and how partners feel about that. OMGYES has been hearing from couples or just the men that this has really changed the way they are able to connect and communicate, and he feels like he understands her more. For the first time, even though they maybe have been together for 20 years, something has finally clicked by having these words and having looked at the techniques together. Now they know there are always new things to explore, and the specifics of what feels good to her and how he can support her.”

RELATED: Everything You Need to Know About Sex Toy Care and Cleanliness

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9 Signs You’re in a Healthy Relationship

There’s more to a great union than sexual attraction and common interests. Here’s how to know if your partnership is healthy.

By Jessica MigalaMedically Reviewed by Seth Gillihan, PhD

Reviewed: April 7, 2023

Medically Reviewed

One of the hallmarks of a healthy relationship is giving each other enough space to pursue separate goals.Kristina Balashova/Stocksy

You and your partner love trying new restaurants together, going on long bike rides, and traveling, but when it comes to being happy and healthy in a relationship, there are other things to consider besides having common interests.

What exactly makes a relationship healthy? “A great relationship is a safe place for both people to love, honor, and respect one another,” says Jennifer Howell, a leadership and relationship coach based in North Carolina. You can communicate your wants, needs, and boundaries, as well as listen to the other person.

A healthy relationship is important to cultivate because the opposite — a toxic relationship — takes a toll on your quality of life by heightening depression and anxiety, impacting sleep, causing you to take up unhealthy habits, and even impacting heart health, says Mary Jo Rapini, a licensed professional counselor in Houston who specializes in intimacy and sex therapy.

Being in a high-quality romantic relationship is associated with greater well-being, according to a study from 2019. But being single was far better for someone’s well-being than being in a less happy partnership, the study found.

What’s more, many couples in unhealthy relationships don’t know that they are, especially if they grew up in a household where it was the norm, says Rapini. So it’s all the more important to be able to identify where yours stands.

Here are nine signs you and your mate are a good match:

1. You’re Not Afraid to Speak Up

It’s easy to know when your partner does something you don’t like — maybe they don’t call you for two days or don’t help out around the house when you live together. But it’s not always easy to speak up and tell your significant other how you’re feeling. “This takes a lot of strength, self-confidence, and courage, because you have to come from a vulnerable place,” says Howell. In a healthy relationship, you’ll feel secure enough to be open with your partner.

2. Trust Is at the Core of the Relationship

Trust is foundational in all relationships, but with social media and always-on gadgets, it can become all too easy to snoop. But in a healthy relationship, you don’t need to do that. In part, that’s because your partner shows you they’re trustworthy. “They’re reliable and available. When they say they’ll be there, they’ll be there,” says Rapini. They also show you they trust you by giving you the freedom and space you need without checking up on you constantly — and that includes checking your phone, she says.

3. You Know Each Other’s Love Language

Many couples swear by the book The 5 Love Languages for a reason: In it, you discover your partner’s “love language” — the way they prefer to give and receive love (through words of affirmation, quality time, gifts, acts of service, or physical touch). In a healthy relationship, you’ve taken the time to learn each other’s “love language” so you can express your love in a way that works for you both, says Howell.

4. You Agree to Disagree on Certain Issues

Every couple fights. But contrary to what you might think, you don’t need to fix every issue. In fact, it’s okay to have a handful of topics that you two will never agree on. Sometimes, “it’s totally fine to agree to disagree. I think that’s healthy fighting,” explains Rapini. “In healthy relationships, there are at least five issues that are ‘no-talkers. ’ They’re the issues that you both differ in opinion and perspective on, and that’s okay.”

5. You Encourage Each Other to Go After Your Goals

“Many of us have a dream or vision for our life, and especially as we age, we want to maintain those visions,” says Howell. According to Howell, it’s okay if your dreams don’t align with one another as long as you “honor and encourage each other to achieve your goals.”

6. You and Your Partner Hold Separate Interests

“Couples who have the greatest love affairs are the ones who are able to maintain their interests, but don’t put guilt on their partner for not sharing it with them,” she says. Meaning, both of you encourage the other to explore what they love on their own. Howell agrees, adding that while it’s easy to adopt your partner’s habits and interests, over time becoming over-reliant on each other can breed resentment. “Developing and investing in yourself builds self-confidence, self-love, and joy,” she says.

7.

You’re Comfortable in Your Own Skin

When you’re in a relationship, it’s crucial to know your strengths and weaknesses, says Howell. Maybe you’re confident around your friends but self-conscious at work. Or you know that little things, like your partner forgetting to take out the trash, can set you off. Whatever your strengths and weaknesses are, being aware of them can help you reach a point of loving and accepting yourself, which in turn can help you love and accept your partner.

8. Boundaries Are Honored and Respected

A healthy relationship means you’re both on the same team. “In a healthy relationship, both parties discuss and agree upon important subjects that are meaningful to one another,” says Howell. She gives the example of budgeting for something big, like a vacation. An unsupportive partner in an unhealthy relationship doesn’t honor that goal, and they may sabotage it by trying to get you to splurge on something unnecessary. If you can talk it out with your partner and they acknowledge and understand your boundaries, that’s a good sign, notes Howell. “However, if your partner repeatedly ignores what you value, including your boundaries, that’s concerning,” she says.

9. You Feel Happy and Supported

Once the initial elation of a new relationship wears off, check in with yourself: Do you feel happy and supported by your partner? How are your mood and self-esteem? If you feel any strain or lack of support, talk to your significant other — it’s the healthy thing to do.

Feeling unhappy in a relationship can lead to health problems down the road. According to a study from 2015, which looked at nearly 5,000 adults over age 50 who were partnered up, having regular negative interactions in a relationship increases the likelihood of suffering from depression and anxiety, and is even linked to suicidal thoughts, likely because relationship dysfunction drives up day-to-day stress. On the other hand, strong partnerships protect people when they’re in the midst of a crisis — exactly the time they need someone on their side.

Editorial Sources and Fact-Checking

• Hudson NW, Lucas RE, Donnellan MB. The Highs and Lows of Love: Romantic Relationship Quality Moderates Whether Spending Time With One’s Partner Predicts Gains or Losses in Well-Being. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin. April 2020.
• Santini ZI, Koyanagi A. Tyrovolas S, Haro, JM. The Association of Relationship Quality and Social Networks With Depression, Anxiety, and Suicidal Ideation Among Older Married Adults: Findings From a Cross-Sectional Analysis of the Irish Longitudinal Study on Ageing (TILDA). Journal of Affective Disorders. July 1, 2015.

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How to bring a woman to orgasm

18+

In addition to the G-spot, women have four more zones of pleasure.

Tags:

Helpful Hints

Sex

IMDB.com

Point A

Occurs in 11 percent of women do not reach the cervix. Right in front of it, you will find point A. Move your finger left and right along this zone, imitating the movements of a janitor on the windshield. Do you feel some kind of seal with a spongy surface with your finger? This means that you have not yet reached your destination, and this is point G that you met along the way. Remember this place, and then move a couple of centimeters deeper, to point A.

How to Wake Up: “The vagina only responds to pressure or movement, just getting to the right place and freezing in it will not be enough,” says sexologist Dr. Jennifer Berman with conviction and insistence. Proceed as follows: use lubrication, do not forget about a long foreplay, and then apply the “hook and pull” technique: reach point A with the pad of your finger, slightly press the “button” and slide your finger up to the entrance.

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O-spot

Occurs in eight percent of women

How to find: did you find her G-spot? It is done? Now turn your finger over, touch the opposite wall and move a little deeper until you feel a spongy area on the back wall of the vagina. Hello, this is point O. It is good both in itself and as a hint for the further development of relations.

How to Wake Up: When a girl is turned on, try the “hook and pull” technique on the O and G points at the same time. Fold the brushes back to each other so that one palm looks up and the other down. Then stick both index fingers into the vagina, so you can stimulate both the anterior and posterior walls of the vagina. They say it will end with an orgasm pretty quickly. A simpler option: rhythmically press the point O, as if stroking it.

Cervix

Sensitive in 7.5 percent of women

How to Find: With deep penetration, you can reach her cervix with your penis. “It feels like you’re hitting the cartilaginous tip of your nose,” sexologist Lisa Masterson from Cedars-Sinai Medical Center (Los Angeles) is not very romantic, but extremely specific. In most women, the cervix is ​​at a depth of 8.9-11.4 centimeters, but this lady is not yet excited. Keep in mind: when blood rushes to the genitals, the cervix moves even deeper into the body. But you can still reach it.

How to wake up: follow your friend’s monthly cycle: around the ovulation area (usually 13-16 days after the start of the last menstruation), stimulation of the cervix can be especially pleasant. Move around this area with one or two fingers, and when you touch the neck itself, gently and gently apply pressure. If your fingers are not long enough, you can use a vibrator with a wide head.

Pelvic floor muscles

12 percent of women use them to orgasm

How to find: Of course, you won’t be able to touch them, but you have seen them at work more than once: the convulsions in which a woman who has received pleasure beats are provided precisely by the contraction of these muscles. Note: A 2014 Brazilian study found that young women with strong pelvic floor muscles were more likely to reach orgasm. Why? If these muscles are in good shape, they can contract during sex without getting tired, pushing her to discharge. Help your girl train invisible muscles.

How to wake up: your partner probably already knows the most effective way – Kegel exercises. Diversify them. Buy a set of vaginal balls, these will be your exercise machines. Lubricate one, place it inside the partner’s vagina and see if she can keep the ball inside with the force of her muscles. Then add a second one. The balls not only excite but also strengthen her muscles and stimulate the G-spot.0003

How to make sex more enjoyable: try these 5 ideas

How to bring a girl to orgasm

18+

Sex blogger Arina Vintovkina decided to figure out what is the cause of this problem and how to overcome it.

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Sex

Orgasm

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The female orgasm is shy, like a canary, and painfully rarely visits us when we are in male company.

Content of article

“According to statistics, only 29 percent of women have an orgasm every time they have sex with their regular partner,” sexologist Valeria Aginskaya shares secret information. As for me, this fact alone is enough not to be too lazy to at least read this article to the end.

And it’s better, of course, to delve into and make sure that your partner joins the happy, guaranteed orgasmic 29 percent.

You are too fast

I suspect that you men have already been buzzing about the need for foreplay, and also about the fact that women do not particularly like “quick shooters”. But knowing your masculine craving for precise wording, perhaps this all sounds somehow … too vague. Well, get specific. “It takes an average of four minutes for a man to reach an orgasm during intimacy, from the first kiss to ejaculation,” comments Valeria Aginskaya, “women need 10–25 minutes.”

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In short, men, you just make yourself a notch: it’s almost never 10 minutes for everything about everything (undress, feel each other, dock the organs that are usually worn in shorts, and exercise a little). Therefore, you should not reduce everything over and over again to a sprint hookup before bed. In this situation, how to give a drink, only one member of the crew remains satisfied – you.

Want some advice? To be sure that you are following the correct timing that your partner will suit, multiply your own timing by five. Is three minutes of foreplay enough for your own eyes? Provide the girl with a 15-minute session of kisses and tenderness. If necessary, look at the clock in the process. It’s better than jumping into the saddle after 120 seconds of polishing the clitoris, and after another 120 seconds doing a light “Ouuuu”. That is why it is so important and necessary to expand the range and geography of caresses – in order to be able to “stretch” the foreplay a little longer, working out, in addition to the obligatory program “lips, breasts, clitoris”, also “arbitrary”, i.e. surrounding with care and attention other parts of the female body.

Positions in which women most often achieve orgasm:

28% Cowgirl

20% Missionary with legs raised

18% Missionary regular

900 02 16% Man behind

13 % “Missionary officer” – her legs on his shoulders

6% “Reverse rider”

Source: The Archives of Sexual Behavior magazine

The general inhibition of women in the issue of getting orgasms experts explain by the fact that girls, in principle, in life receive less than what is called “stimulus material” in the jargon of sexologists.

Unlike you guys, we think less about sex, masturbate less at work, watch porn less, and carry fewer outrageous pornographic scripts inside our beautiful heads. They say that this is somehow connected with the fact that we, girls, almost do not see our genitals – unlike men, who, during each trip to the toilet, have the good fortune to see their penis, which includes the corresponding associative series.

In short, we go through life knowing of course that sex exists. But it does not permeate our entire existence, thoughts and aspirations. “A relatively healthy and not old man is able to experience a rush of blood to the cavernous tissues just by looking at the tight ass of the waitress. For you, this is the norm. Situations when a girl’s panties get wet when looking at a stranger are rather an exception, ”Valeria notes.

You are able to go from something mundane like washing dishes straight to having sex and you can definitely finish. We women usually don’t. Well, more precisely, we can go. But everything that happens in bed, in terms of the degree of excitement, will most likely resemble a tram ride at rush hour: crowded, hot, shaking. We have little mechanical stimulation. We need a mood for sex. Therefore, if you want your partner to finish, there should be at least some temporary backlash between the “dishes” station and the “sex” station, when the girl thinks about sex at least for a moment and the lights on her “remote control” come to life and start blinking slightly . And the simplest and most correct thing in this case is to say: “Baby, I’ll sort out the dishes myself somehow. And by the way, a bubble bath and a glass of lambrusco are waiting for you.” By the way, there were cases when a girl who was not spoiled by a good attitude experienced an orgasm from this one phrase.

What else can help the case? Well, for example, joint viewing of porn or some more light erotic movie masterpieces. Exchange playful messages or spicy pics throughout the day. Discussing erotic fantasies – although any conversations that are allowed in your couple on sexual and near-sexual topics will do. In other words, it is necessary and important that this part of your life together become more convex, voluminous and not be reduced to silent swarming under the covers. Then, mark my word, things will immediately go smoothly.

Foreplay that effectively brings her to climax:

31% Breast caress

27% Finger clitoris stimulation

24% Oral genital stimulation

22% Stimulation of the entire vagina area with fingers

20% She caresses her own clitoris

11% “Dirty” talk

Source: The Archives of Sexual Behavior

You stimulate the clitoris incorrectly

In principle, we modern women should not complain. I recently came across an interesting article that talked about how long we were basically denied the existence of … the clitoris. How he was given all sorts of offensive nicknames and attributed strange functions. How it was considered fiction, pathology and a reason to burn a woman at the stake. Think and shudder: 19In 69, a man landed on the moon, in 1982 the Internet was invented, and only in 1998 did scientists figure out how the clitoris works!

So, according to the latest intelligence, that tiny bump is just the tip of the iceberg. “The clitoris has an inner part that wraps around the entire groin area and is comparable in size to the size of an average penis,” reports our sexologist. And the “legs” of the clitoris require the same, or even more attention than the tubercle itself. But I won’t digress.

Here is the main thing you need to know about the clitoral legs (besides the fact that they exist): it is, in fact, the same cavernous body, which, like the penis, is responsive to stimulation and filled with blood (and the better the blood supply, the inevitable orgasm). The legs of the clitoris “hug” the entrance to the vagina. And you can stimulate them if you massage, knead, lick and bite your partner’s labia, perineum and all surrounding areas.

Can the old fashioned way be limited to stimulation of only the visible part of the clitoris? Can. But don’t. Because the effect of rubbing the “bump” is about the same as if you were being procrastinated at the very tip of the head of the penis, but the penis itself was not touched. Would you cum from such a micro-impact?

Sleeping vagina

You have probably heard that the female vagina is equipped with a mass of sensitive points. In addition to the legendary G-spot, there is the A-spot (on the cervix; responsible for uterine orgasms), the U-spot (the urethral zone; plays the first fiddle in jet orgasms), and so on. There are really many places of pleasure. Only sense from them is zero if they are, in the terminology of sexologists, “unawakened.” “Of course, there is a chance that they will wake up by themselves: with age, after childbirth, in the process of active copulation,” notes Valeria, “but this chance, frankly, is small.” Therefore, most women walk around with a “sleeping” (moreover, lethargic sleep) vagina, and blow off the clitoris for everyone (which, as mentioned in the paragraph earlier, is not always correctly exploited). Not surprisingly, the rate of orgasms per capita of the female population is negligible.

The joke is that for a “wake-up” it is not at all enough to “feel” that very point once a month and rub it a little (which is also not always possible, since in a sleepy state the same G-spot is often weakly palpated). It would not be an exaggeration to say that this is generally a separate serious project. On average, in order for the “sleeping” point to wake up, it will take 7-10 days (!) of daily (!!!) exercises. And you will need not only time, strength, patience, but also, possibly, a vibrator.

Some men in principle do not know that the vagina needs to be “awakened”. Others are lazy. Others think that somehow she will wake up. Women could scribble orgasms, figuratively speaking, on powerful computers, and end up grinding them out on typewriters

Take, for example, the G-spot. You “accelerate” your partner in the usual way (i.e., clitoral stimulation), while simultaneously connecting the stimulation of the G zone with a vibrator of a suitable configuration. On the approaches to orgasm, you treacherously remove your finger from the clitoris so that the girl does not “roll out into an orgasm” by inertia. Give the subject a little (five seconds) to catch his breath and start the same rigmarole again (clitoris + G). And so three times in a session. Then you can let her finish.

In the following days of training, you try to remove your finger from her clitoris earlier and earlier, paying constant attention to the G-spot. “Your task is to “switch” orgasm from a developed and familiar area (clitoris) to a new zone (G-spot). And this happens due to the fact that, without receiving the desired discharge several times in a row, the woman’s brain begins to pay attention to alternative sources of pleasure, gradually “switching” to them, Valeria explains the essence of the procedure. – Keep in mind that it is wiser to plan a wake-up call for the period of a girl’s ovulation as the most orgasmic (from the 10th to the 14th day of the cycle; we count from the first day of menstruation).

What she feels at the moment of orgasm:

81% Complete loss of herself

78% Like a river is taking you away, swaying on waves

70% Exultation in the whole body

62% Out of breath

55% Feeling that I really want to write

43% Feeling of ejaculation

Source: The Archives of Sexual Behavior magazine

Ignorance of my own anatomy

I will now tell you a terrible secret: in of female anatomy, not only men, but and the women themselves. Theoretically, a curious and not lazy girl could independently explore and awaken her own sensitive areas. But these are really few. The vast majority have a fairly superficial idea even of what their personal vagina looks like!

A woman can live to an advanced age of 35, give birth to three children and change four husbands, but never once try to satisfy herself in a well-lit room and in front of a mirror in order to see in detail herself “there” and the metamorphoses that occur with her body in moment of orgasm.