How to make woman climax. Unlocking the Secrets of Female Pleasure: A Comprehensive Guide to the Female Climax
How do women achieve orgasm. What are the different types of female orgasms. Can all women experience multiple orgasms. How can partners enhance sexual pleasure for women. What factors may inhibit female orgasm.
The Four Stages of Female Sexual Response
Understanding the female sexual response cycle is crucial for both women and their partners in achieving sexual satisfaction. Renowned sex researchers William Masters and Virginia Johnson outlined a four-step process that many women experience during sexual encounters:
- Excitement: The initial phase of arousal where physical and mental changes begin
- Plateau: A period of intensifying sexual tension and pleasure
- Orgasm: The climax of sexual pleasure, characterized by rhythmic muscular contractions
- Resolution: The body’s return to its pre-arousal state
Let’s explore each stage in more detail to gain a deeper understanding of the female sexual experience.
Excitement: The Beginning of Arousal
During the excitement phase, a woman’s body prepares for sexual activity. Physical changes include:
- Increased blood flow to the genitals, causing the clitoris to swell and the vagina to lubricate
- Nipple erection and breast enlargement
- Elevated heart rate and blood pressure
- A full-body “sexual blush” may appear
Hormones and neurotransmitters play a crucial role in this process. Dr. Ingber notes that testosterone, dopamine, and serotonin are involved in initiating and maintaining arousal.
Plateau: Building Sexual Tension
As sexual stimulation continues, the plateau phase intensifies the physical and mental responses:
- The outer third of the vagina becomes engorged with blood, forming the “orgasmic platform”
- Breathing, heart rate, and blood pressure continue to increase
- Mental focus narrows exclusively to sexual stimuli
This phase can last for varying lengths of time and may fluctuate in intensity before leading to orgasm.
Orgasm: The Peak of Pleasure
The orgasm phase is characterized by a series of involuntary, rhythmic contractions:
- Contractions occur in the uterus, vagina, and pelvic floor muscles
- A wave of warmth often spreads throughout the body
- Some women may experience ejaculation or “squirting”
- Muscle contractions may occur throughout the body
The duration and intensity of orgasms can vary greatly among women and even from one experience to another.
Resolution: Return to Baseline
Following orgasm, the body gradually returns to its pre-arousal state:
- Blood flow decreases in the genitals and other engorged areas
- Heart rate, blood pressure, and breathing normalize
- A sense of relaxation and well-being often follows
Some women may be capable of returning to the orgasm phase quickly, potentially experiencing multiple orgasms.
Exploring the Diversity of Female Orgasms
While the basic physiological response may be similar, women can experience orgasms through various types of stimulation. Some researchers suggest that there may be as many as 12 distinct types of female orgasms. Here are some of the most common:
Clitoral Orgasms: The Most Common Path to Pleasure
Clitoral stimulation is often considered the most reliable way for women to achieve orgasm. Dr. Steven R. Goldstein, director of gynecologic ultrasound at New York University’s Langone Medical Center, explains that clitoral orgasms are “probably the closest analogue to male orgasm.” The clitoris, with its high concentration of nerve endings, responds to direct or indirect stimulation, leading to intense pleasure and release.
Vaginal Orgasms and the G-Spot Debate
Some women report experiencing orgasms through vaginal stimulation alone. The existence and nature of the G-spot, named after Dr. Ernst Gräfenberg, has been a topic of scientific debate for decades. Dr. Beverly Whipple, a prominent sex researcher, describes the G-spot as an area of sensitive tissue located about 1-2 inches inside the vagina on the front wall.
Is the G-spot real? While some women report intense pleasure from stimulation of this area, others may not experience the same sensations. The variability in experiences has led to ongoing research and discussion in the scientific community.
Blended Orgasms: Combining Pleasure Points
A blended orgasm occurs when multiple erogenous zones are stimulated simultaneously, often resulting in a more intense climax. This can involve a combination of clitoral, vaginal, and other forms of stimulation.
Cervical Orgasms: Deep Stimulation
Some women report experiencing orgasms through stimulation of the cervix, typically during deep penetration. These orgasms are often described as full-body experiences that may differ in sensation from clitoral or vaginal orgasms.
Anal Orgasms: Exploring Taboo Territories
The anus and surrounding area contain many nerve endings that can contribute to sexual pleasure. Some women find that anal stimulation, either alone or in combination with other forms of stimulation, can lead to orgasm.
The Role of Non-Genital Stimulation in Female Pleasure
Sexual pleasure and orgasm in women are not limited to genital stimulation. Various parts of the body can contribute to sexual arousal and even orgasm:
Nipple and Breast Orgasms
The breasts and nipples are highly sensitive erogenous zones. Some women report achieving orgasm through breast and nipple stimulation alone. This phenomenon is supported by research showing that nipple stimulation activates the same areas of the brain as genital stimulation.
The Power of the Mind: Thinking Off
“Thinking off” refers to the ability to achieve orgasm through mental stimulation alone, without any physical touch. While rare, some women have reported experiencing orgasms through vivid sexual imagery, fantasies, or even in their sleep.
The Vagus Nerve: A Direct Path to Pleasure
Researchers have identified a nerve pathway outside the spinal cord, known as the vagus nerve, that can transmit sensations directly to the brain, potentially leading to orgasm. This discovery helps explain how some individuals with spinal cord injuries can still experience sexual pleasure and orgasm.
Factors Affecting Female Orgasm: Obstacles and Solutions
While the capacity for sexual pleasure is innate, various factors can impact a woman’s ability to achieve orgasm:
Physical Factors
- Hormonal imbalances
- Certain medications, particularly antidepressants
- Chronic health conditions
- Pelvic floor dysfunction
Psychological and Emotional Factors
- Anxiety and depression
- Stress
- Past trauma or sexual abuse
- Negative body image
- Relationship issues
Dr. Ingber notes that these emotional factors can interfere with the sexual response cycle, preventing women from fully engaging in and enjoying sexual experiences.
Addressing Orgasmic Difficulties
For women experiencing difficulty achieving orgasm, several approaches may be helpful:
- Sex therapy or counseling
- Pelvic floor physical therapy
- Mindfulness and relaxation techniques
- Exploration of sexual preferences and desires
- Communication with partners about needs and desires
It’s estimated that up to 25% of American women may have difficulty experiencing orgasm. If persistent issues arise, consulting with a healthcare provider or sex therapist can provide valuable guidance and solutions.
Enhancing Female Sexual Pleasure: Tips and Techniques
Improving sexual experiences and increasing the likelihood of orgasm involves a combination of physical techniques, communication, and emotional connection. Here are some strategies that can enhance female sexual pleasure:
Clitoral Stimulation Techniques
Given the importance of the clitoris in female sexual pleasure, exploring different methods of stimulation can be beneficial:
- Direct manual stimulation with fingers or hands
- Oral sex focusing on the clitoral area
- Use of vibrators or other sex toys designed for clitoral stimulation
- Indirect stimulation through movements during intercourse
Exploring the G-Spot
For women interested in G-spot stimulation, try the following:
- Use a “come hither” motion with fingers to stimulate the front vaginal wall
- Experiment with sex positions that allow for deeper penetration and friction against the front vaginal wall
- Try G-spot specific sex toys or vibrators
The Importance of Foreplay
Extending foreplay can significantly enhance arousal and increase the likelihood of orgasm:
- Engage in full-body sensual touch and massage
- Experiment with different forms of non-genital stimulation
- Build anticipation through teasing and gradual escalation
Mindfulness and Relaxation
Practicing mindfulness can help women stay present and focused during sexual experiences:
- Try deep breathing exercises before and during sexual activity
- Focus on physical sensations rather than performance or outcome
- Incorporate meditation or relaxation techniques into daily life to reduce overall stress
Communication and Intimacy: Keys to Sexual Satisfaction
Open communication between partners is crucial for satisfying sexual experiences:
Expressing Desires and Boundaries
- Discuss sexual preferences, fantasies, and boundaries with partners
- Provide feedback during intimate moments about what feels good
- Be open to trying new things while respecting each other’s comfort levels
Building Emotional Intimacy
Emotional connection can enhance physical pleasure:
- Engage in non-sexual physical affection regularly
- Share vulnerable thoughts and feelings with your partner
- Practice active listening and empathy in all aspects of the relationship
The Role of Sex Toys and Aids in Female Pleasure
Sex toys can be valuable tools for exploration and enhancement of sexual pleasure:
Types of Sex Toys for Women
- Vibrators (clitoral, G-spot, or combination)
- Dildos
- Anal toys
- Nipple stimulators
- Couples’ toys for shared pleasure
Incorporating Toys into Partnered Sex
Using sex toys with a partner can add novelty and increase pleasure:
- Discuss desires and boundaries regarding toy use
- Start with simpler toys and gradually explore more complex options
- Use toys as an addition to, not a replacement for, other forms of intimacy
By exploring these various aspects of female sexual pleasure, women and their partners can work together to create fulfilling and satisfying intimate experiences. Remember that every woman’s body and preferences are unique, so patience, communication, and a willingness to experiment are key to discovering what works best for each individual.
The Female Climax, Orgasm, and Pleasure
How Women Achieve Orgasm
One of the ways women can experience orgasm is through a goal-oriented four-step process first described by the sex researchers William Masters and Virginia Johnson decades ago.
1. Excitement In this state of desire or arousal, the woman initiates or agrees to sex, and as it commences she finds herself focusing mainly on sexual stimuli. Blood begins to engorge the clitoris, vagina, and nipples, and creates a full-body sexual blush. Heart rate and blood pressure increases. Testosterone and neurotransmitters such as dopamine and serotonin are involved in these processes, says Dr. Ingber.
2. Plateau Sexual tension builds as a precursor to orgasm. The outer one-third of the vagina becomes particularly engorged with blood, creating what researchers refer to as the “orgasmic platform.” Focus on sexual stimuli drowns out all other sensations. Heart rate, blood pressure, and respiration continue to increase.
3. Orgasm A series of rhythmic contractions occur in the uterus, vagina, and pelvic floor muscles. The sexual tension caused by lovemaking or self-stimulation releases, and muscles throughout the body may contract. A feeling of warmth usually emanates from the pelvis and spreads throughout the entire body.
4. Resolution The body relaxes, with blood flowing away from the engorged sexual organs. Heart rate, blood pressure, and respiration return to normal.
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Different Types of Stimulation, Different Types of Orgasm
Women are blessed with bodies that are capable of experiencing orgasm in more ways than one.
Some researchers believe that there are as many as 12 types of female orgasms. The most common type is a “clitoral” orgasm, says Ingber.
RELATED: Understanding the Male Climax
Clitoral stimulation has been proved the surest route to orgasm. “I think that clitoral stimulation [produces] probably the closest analogue to male orgasm, where you get erectile tissue, there is release, and after release it is uncomfortable to continue,” says Steven R. Goldstein, MD, the director of gynecologic ultrasound and codirector of bone densitometry at New York University’s Langone Medical Center and a professor of obstetrics and gynecology at the New York University School of Medicine.
RELATED: Deconstructing Sex Drive: What Your Libido Says About Your Health
Vaginal Stimulation, the G-Spot, and Intense Sexual Pleasure
But some women can also experience orgasm through vaginal stimulation. One group of researchers credit the G-spot, an area named and described by Beverly Whipple, PhD, RN, a professor emerita at Rutgers University in Newark, New Jersey, and a past president of the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT).
The G-spot is an area felt through the wall of the vagina, an inch or two behind the back of the pubic bone near the junction of the bladder and the urethra and made up of tissues of the clitoris, urethra, and the female prostate gland, says Dr. Whipple. Some researchers believe that when stimulated, the G-spot causes intense sexual pleasure in some women; others question whether women can feel such pleasure at this location at all.
RELATED: The Truth About 8 Masturbation Myths
Sensory Pathways, Stimulation, and Orgasm Generation
Women also have been able to have orgasms through stimulation of the breasts or other parts of the body, or through the use of sexual imagery without any touch at all. Researchers have even found a nerve pathway outside the spinal cord, through the sensory vagus nerve, that will lead a woman to experience orgasm through sensations transmitted directly to the brain. “There are many nerve pathways that are responsible for the experience of orgasm in women,” says Whipple.
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The Female Orgasm: Problems Getting There
While there are physical problems that can keep a woman from experiencing orgasm, emotions can play a role, too. Some sex researchers say that anxiety and depression can prevent a woman from progressing along the sexual response cycle, says Ingber. Feelings of fear, guilt, distraction, or a loss of control can also affect orgasm. Similarly to men with erectile dysfunction, women can sometimes have problems achieving or maintaining adequate blood flow, says Ingber.
RELATED: Sex Therapy: What Men and Women Should Know
Treatments and Therapies to Help Women Reach Orgasm
It is estimated that as many as a quarter of American women have problems experiencing orgasm.
Doctors and sex therapists use several types of therapies to help women overcome these blocks to orgasm. Directed masturbation, sex education, and behavioral therapy are some of the means a woman might want to investigate if she cannot reach climax. Women may also want to try using a vibrator to provide increased clitoral stimulation, or a dildo crafted to provide better stimulation of the G-spot.
RELATED: Acupuncture Helps Boost Your Sex Drive, Sex Life, and Pleasure
Interventions to Consider for Problems With Orgasm
If behavioral methods are not working and a woman is interested in other intervention, there are solutions better-researched for male erectile dysfunction that may help.
Ingber says that “for women having trouble with arousal, similar to men, Viagra (sildenafil) can be used,” he says. “Additionally, vacuum erection devices such as the Fiera can be used in order to improve libido and arousal. This applies gentle suction to the clitoris.”
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Medical Treatments for Women With Low Sexual Desire
For women, particularly postmenopausal women, who have little sexual desire, an off-label use of topical testosterone can be prescribed. And an FDA-approved therapy called Addyi (flibanserin) may be effective for low libido in women with hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD), says Ingber.
Additional reporting by Dennis Thompson Jr.
5 Ways to Spice Up Your Sex Life
“Quickies” certainly have their time and place, but couples who continuously skip foreplay are passing up a great way to get emotionally and physically warmed up for a romp. “Foreplay is crucial for good sex,” says Debra Herbenick, PhD, MPH, director of the Center for Sexual Health Promotion at Indiana University in Bloomington. “It’s not just an old wives’ tale that foreplay is something that people should spend more time doing.”
Read on to discover the physicial and emotional benefits of foreplay, plus how to incorporate more of it into your sexual routine.
The Benefits of Foreplay
Doing anything that’s sexually arousing can help a woman lubricate, which in turn may help a man get and maintain an erection. Dr. Herbenick says that when a man is having difficulty achieving climax, he may find it easier if he and his partner have engaged in foreplay before sex.
For women, foreplay can actually make sex more pleasurable. “When a woman’s body becomes aroused, the vaginal muscles pull the uterus up a bit, making more room in the vagina,” says Herbenick. This process, called vaginal tenting, creates more space, which makes sex more enjoyable. “If this doesn’t happen, sex may be uncomfortable for a woman,” notes Herbenick.
RELATED: 6 Surprising Sex Hazards
Foreplay can also help a couple feel closer and more intimate, which ultimately may lead both partners to feel more aroused, says Herbenick. Foreplay is really “about building an emotional connection and getting some excitement going,” she says.
How to Communicate About Foreplay
You can’t know what your partner likes and wants during foreplay if you don’t talk about it. “People don’t spend enough time just talking to each other when they’re not having sex,” says Herbenick. So ask your partner questions about how he or she wants to be touched, stroked, kissed, and caressed — but talk about it outside of the bedroom.
“While it’s helpful to get information about how your partner wants to be touched in the moment, it’s easier to have those conversations when you’re not about to have sex,” says Herbenick.
5 Ways to Include Foreplay in Your Sexual Routine
There is no good or bad method of foreplay, and you don’t have to spend hours cuddling, stroking, and kissing before you can move on to sex. A few minutes of foreplay may be all you need.
“Aim for at least 10 minutes to give your bodies enough time to warm up,” suggets Herbenick. What’s important is to “focus on kissing and stroking the stomach, inner thighs, and breasts before moving toward the genitals,” she notes.
To get your minds and bodies warmed up for sex, try these ways to incorporate foreplay into your routine:
1. Play a game. Consider purchasing sex games that offer tips and rules on what to do to each other.
2. Talk dirty. Say what you’re feeling, what you want your partner to do, and what you’re thinking.
3. Get close. Try different ways to touch and hold each other, such as dancing or showering together.
4. Use oils and flavored products. Give each other back, foot, or full body massages with an oil or lotion. Pour chocolate, whipped cream, or other tasty delights on your partner’s skin, and take your time licking it off.
5. Touch each other. Caress your partner’s face, run your fingers through the hair, and gently tickle the insides of the arms, the stomach, and the thighs. Rub against each other or lightly tickle — whatever feels good.
How to Make a Woman Orgasm
Here’s Everything You Need to Know About Making Her Climax
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More so than almost any other aspect of human sexual interactions, the female orgasm is a mystery.
Men want to know how to give them. Women want to know how to have them. Porn loves to fake them. Scientists aren’t clear on why they exist. Prudes and misogynists don’t want them to happen at all.
But just like guys, ladies are also capable of having incredibly powerful, awesome orgasms.
RELATED: Understanding the Female Orgasm
In fact, they’re often able to have multiple orgasms within a short span of time, meaning if you know what you’re doing, it’s absolutely possible to give her mind blowing amounts of sexual pleasure.
Intrigued? AskMen spoke with four different sex experts to give you the information you need about how to make a woman orgasm.
What Is a Female Orgasm?
First, it’s worth clarifying what an orgasm is, period.
“An orgasm is the involuntary release of tension at the height of the sexual response cycle,” says SKYN Condoms sex and intimacy expert and certifed sex coach Gigi Engle. “In most cases, it is a highly pleasurable feeling. It is marked by the release of built-up sexual feelings and the tension in the genitals and other areas of the body that are responding to sexual stimuli.”
RELATED: Understanding the Male Orgasm
As Engle notes, it’s typically a highly pleasurable feeling like an explosion of pleasure, regardless of what your gender is. The more buildup you have, the more pleasurable and intense the orgasm is.
How Are the Male and Female Orgasms Different?
The orgasm is typically different in a few noteworthy ways, all depending on your biological sex.
Ejaculation
For one, the male orgasm is typically tied to ejaculation, whereas the female orgasm really isn’t.
“Orgasm and ejaculation tend to occur simultaneously when you have a penis,” says Dr. Jess O’Reilly, sexologist and host of the “Drive Her Wild With Pleasure” video course. “This certainly isn’t always the case (you certainly have dry orgasms), but for most folks, they occur at the same time more often than not. For people with clitorises, this is less often the case.”
Female orgasm and female ejaculation are much less in sync than male orgasm and male ejaculation. Even women who can squirt don’t always do so when they climax, and they’re sometimes able to squirt without climaxing at all.
Amount
Men typically don’t ejaculate multiple times in a row. That’s because of their refractory periods — the period of time beginning when you orgasm and lasts until you’re able to orgasm again — is on average much longer than it is for women.
It’s also associated with more noticeable physical signs such as a man’s penis becoming flaccid after orgasm. It may even be too sensitive for any further sexual activity for a period of between several minutes and several hours, which typically lengthens as a man ages.
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Women, however, have quite short refractory periods, to the point where they might be hardly noticeable. Depending on the stimulation, a woman could orgasm dozens of times in a single sex or masturbation session.
Timing
As well, there’s the matter of timing. While many men are capable of reaching orgasm pretty quickly, not all women are blessed with the same ability.
“Some women need a lot of time to build up to an orgasm while others, with the right sensations, get off fairly quickly,” says Kayla Lords, a sexpert for JackAndJillAdult.com.
Generally speaking, the male orgasm takes much less time to occur than the female orgasm — at least, when it comes to intercourse, says O’Reilly.
“When women are on our own, we don’t tend to take long at all,” she notes. “This is because we know what we enjoy and we do it.”
Methods
So what do they enjoy, exactly? Lots of different things:
“How people achieve orgasm is often quite different between men and women,” says Lords. “Many women need very specific stimulation: clitoral, G-spot, a combination of the two. They may also prefer, want, and/or need to have other parts of their body touched and stimulated — breasts and nipples, legs, torso, neck, etc.”
As for the exact methods, well, those are also varied.
“We may use our fingers or a vibrator, lie on our stomachs and rub against the mattress, watch porn, fantasize, and/or play with running water,” says O’Reilly. “We can do all of these things with you as well if you’re willing to think outside of the box (and often beyond penile/vaginal intercourse).”
Orgasm Similarities
Despite the differences, climaxes are relatively similar regardless of your sex.
“Both men and women experience the involuntary release of tension,” notes Engle, “followed by the penis becoming flaccid, the vulva returning to its normal color and the swelling going down.”
Perhaps even more important? The sensation is thought to be essentially the same for both male and female participants.
“The female and male orgasms aren’t that much different from each other in terms of sensation,” says Lords. “In self-reported studies, when people of all genders described their orgasms, researchers were unable to tell which gender was describing their pleasure.”
How to Make a Woman Orgasm
Wanting to give your partner pleasure is a great approach when it comes to sex. There’s not much worse than a selfish lover who only cares about their own experience.
RELATED: What Is the Orgasm Gap? (And Why You Should Care)
But wanting to give your partner an orgasm and actually doing so are very different things. So how does one go about it, exactly?
Tips to Give Her an Orgasm
Learn About Her Anatomy
First, you should familiarize yourself with the different parts of a vagina and vulva. If her genitals are different from yours, it won’t hurt to know what the different parts are called, and what they’re like.
“Learn your anatomy so you actually can figure out what you’re doing, and how to touch in ways that are actually pleasurable for her,” says sex educator Kenneth Play. “It’s a combination of technical skill, anatomy awareness and checking in with her for feedback.”
Ask Her About What She Likes
“If she uses sex toys and masturbates regularly, she’ll definitely know her body better than you do,” notes Lords. “Give her the sensation she says she wants. If she tells you slow, gentle touches on her clit, do that. If she says she needs her breasts stroked during penetration, do that.”
According to O’Reilly, it wouldn’t hurt to “give her multiple choice options:
- ‘Here or there?’
- ‘Slower or faster?’
- ‘Up or down?’”
Work With Her to Discover What Feels Good
Just because she has a vagina doesn’t necessarily mean she knows what she’s into. Because girls and young women are often told that sex is wrong or that they shouldn’t engage in it, many have less experience with masturbation or sexual pleasure than boys their age.
RELATED: Why Slut Shaming Is So Harmful
“If she doesn’t know what she needs, experiment with touch and sensation,” says Lords. “Start slow and gentle, and ask a lot of questions:
- ‘Does this feel good?’
- ‘Do you like this?’
- ‘Should I keep going?’”
If she’s used to masturbating but doesn’t have experience with partners, Play suggests asking her to show you what she likes.
“If she’s struggling, ask if she can masturbate herself to orgasm and then calibrate using the techniques she uses,” he notes. “Mimic what she does, give her the same sensations.”
Don’t Give Up Too Quickly
Women often take longer to climax, making it important not to get frustrated in the early going.
“Don’t listen to your dick clock, listen to her clit clock!” explains Play. “What I mean by that is, don’t assume that she’s finished cumming when you think she’s done, keep going until she says she’s good or asks you to stop. The orgasm can actually last a bit of time, if done right, and doesn’t have the visual cue like ejaculation does. So keep going!”
Use Your Hands
“Use your hands or encourage her to do the same,” suggests O’Reilly. “Reach down and give her a hand, as external stimulation is more likely to lead to orgasm than vaginal penetration for many people.”
In addition to traditional fingering methods, you could also try something called the “pussy pocket.”
“Place your palm on her pubic mound and let your fingers press all along her lips to create a ‘pocket,’” she adds. “You can rub gently to begin with and then increase the pressure and speed as she gets more and more riled up.”
Try Clitoris-Friendly Sex Positions
“Pay attention to the clitoris like it is the center of your universe. The clitoris is the key to orgasm,” says Engle. And according to O’Reilly, that goes for penetration, too.
“If you’re having intercourse, adjust your body so that she can rub her pubic mound against your pubic bone,” she notes. “You may not be able to thrust in and out with the same vigor (which is probably better anyway), but you can still slide inside of her while she rubs her clitoris on the outside.”
Things Not to Do
If you’re doing things that hurt your partner or make it harder for them to orgasm, you might never succeed at bringing them to climax. Along with the good, what are the female orgasm no-nos you should stay away from?
Don’t Assume Intercourse Alone Will Be Enough
You should be cognizant that thrusting your penis in a vagina and thrusting, even if you use some great thrusting techniques, may not be enough to make your partner climax.
“Intercourse can and often does feel good,” says Engle. But for the majority of women, she notes, “the clitoris requires stimulation in order to orgasm”
Don’t Assume Every Woman Like the Same Things
“A lot of guys have this ‘woke bro’ script — you make out, you touchy-touchy, you go down on her, and then f*ck her,” says Play. “But not every woman enjoys all of those things or wants them always done like a script! It’s good to be giving, yes, but learn to calibrate, ask for feedback, find out what she likes.”
Don’t Speed Up When She Gets Close
“Guys have a tendency to think they need to speed up or change things around as their partner becomes aroused,” says Lords. “If your partner says, ‘More!’ or ‘Keep going!’ do not change what you’re doing. You’ve found the right spot, intensity and speed, and until she tells you differently, keep it up.”
Don’t Try to ‘Jackhammer’ Her
“‘Jackhammering’ is what you see in porn a lot,” says Play. “It’s not that cervical stimulation isn’t pleasurable, but that it’s usually more pleasurable after she’s already cum a few times. Her clit should already be engorged, she should be aroused and preferably you’ve given her a few orgasms before you go in like that.”
RELATED: Porn Moves You Shouldn’t Try in Real Sex
There are plenty of ways to move your hips aside from this aggressive, infamous porno move.
“Try sliding in as slowly as possible and pulling out quickly,” describes O’Reilly. “Alternate between slow and fast movements. Curl your hips as you slide inside. Undulate your body gently and purposefully. Slide inside, hold still and let her move around to control the speed, depth and angle.”
Don’t Rush to Overwhelm Her Clit
“Don’t go straight for the goods!” warns O’Reilly. “We know you’ve found the clitoris, but you don’t have to ring it like a doorbell. Instead, slide your hands all around the vulva. Paint figure eights over the lips. Cross your fingers and rotate as you slowly slide in at a shallow depth.”
If You’re Struggling to Make a Woman Orgasm
One of the most embarrassing moments a guy can experience in bed is feeling like you can’t properly please your partner. Worse than just the realization is the sense of pressure you can feel afterwards — the harder and harder you try to make it work, the more nervous you can get, and the situation becomes deeply unsexy for everyone involved.
But what exactly should you do if you’re struggling to get your partner to cum?
Be Consistent
“If she starts to have strong reactions (shaking, intense breathing, clenching her thighs around you) don’t decide to change your technique then,” says Play. “The biggest complaint I’ve had women share with me is that their partner changes his motions at the exact wrong moment. So if she seems to like it, keep doing it!”
Ask About What Feels Good…
“Talk to your partner,” says Lords. “Ask what they need you to do, [whether] better or differently. Put your ego aside for this one. This is about giving your partner pleasure, and sometimes it requires hearing that the thing you always do with your tongue or hand doesn’t work.”
RELATED: How to Ask Questions in Bed in a Sexy Way
…But Don’t Pester
“Don’t ask her over and over again, ‘Did you come yet?’” advises O’Reilly. “Pressure is the antithesis to pleasure. It’s great that you’re concerned about her experience, but there are more effective ways to ask for feedback.”
According to her, questions like,
- “‘Do you like that?’ or
- ‘Do you want more?’”
are a better strategy.
Make Sure to Enjoy Yourself, Too
“Tune into your own pleasure,” says O’Reilly. “Don’t get so hung up on ‘giving’ her an orgasm that you’re not enjoying yourself. The more you relax, breathe and really indulge in the experience, the more likely she is to do the same. Breathe deeply and let your sounds flow without inhibition.”
Try Different Positions
“Spend time exploring and experimenting with each other’s bodies,” suggests Lords. “It’s possible that a different sexual position or just a new way of approaching foreplay will lead to an orgasm, but you’ve got to be willing to try new things.”
Try Sex Toys
“Be open to the idea of sex toys,” says Lords. “It’s not a replacement for you — it’s just a tool to add stimulation. While it’s working on her clit or G-spot, you can be doing a lot of other sexy things together.”
Products to Make Her Orgasm
Lots of things in life can be solved with hard work and determination, but sometimes, a little technological boost doesn’t hurt, either.
RELATED: The Best Sex Toys for Women, Revealed
If you’re looking to spend some money on your partner’s orgasm, here are five great options to consider:
Womanizer Classic
Since clitoral pleasure is so central to many women’s orgasms, if you’re looking to buy her a toy that’ll get her there, it makes sense to use a clitoral toy. Probably the best of the bunch right now is the Womanizer, which uses a patented airflow technology to stimulate the clitoris without overwhelming it. Lots of other brands have come to market with their own version of this concept, but the Womanizer Classic powerful vacuum-style suction is tough to beat. In addition to giving her quick, easy and repeatable orgasms, she’s less much less likely to suffer from a sore clitoris afterwards, making this a great toy both for solo and couples play.
$129 at AdamEve.com
Adam & Eve Wand Massager
Before airflow tech, massage wand-style vibrators dominated the clitoral pleasure market, and for many they’re still the preferred choice. While they’re big and bulky compared to the slim and trim Womanizer-type toys, with that size comes serious power — and longer battery life. If your partner’s someone who needs a lot of stimulation to climax, a wand massager like this one from legendary sex toy retailer Adam & Eve might be the way to go. It’s got dual speeds, a long handle and a spring head that’s both comfortable and gentle so it doesn’t totally destroy her.
$54.95 at AdamEve.com
Tracy’s Dog Vibrator
If she’s looking for dual G-spot and clitoral pleasure, the uniquely named Tracy’s Dog vibrator could be just the thing for her. It’s a toy that mixes the Womanizer’s clit-sucking airflow concept with a powerful internal vibrator featuring 10 different vibration patterns, meaning the clit and G-spot are in for some seriously simultaneous pleasure. Blended orgasms, anyone? The toy’s flexible enough to accomodate lots of different shapes and sizes, but for couples, it’s better suited to masturbation, anal or oral play, since the clit and vagina are pretty much spoken for when it’s in use.
$46.99 at Amazon.com
Swiss Navy Lubricant
One aspect of female pleasure that doesn’t always get the discussion its due is lubrication. Because vaginas often secrete a lubricating agent during arousal, lots of people assume that that’s enough — but it isn’t for everyone, or in every case. If you’re trying to make do with just your partner’s natural lubrication (and/or some saliva), you might be subjecting her to painful sex, which is almost always going to make it much harder to orgasm. Fix that ASAP with some lube, like this one from Swiss Navy, which comes in both water-based and silicone-based varieties. The former dries up more quickly but is toy-safe; the latter will stay slippery for longer, but shouldn’t be used with silicone-based toys.
$27.99 at Amazon.com
OMGYES
If the issue with orgasms isn’t a lack of products so much as a lack of confidence in your skills, maybe the place to turn is OMGYES, which believes it can teach any man the secret to female sexual pleasure. The company has been around for several years now, and bases its sexual intel on in-depth interviews with literally thousands of women. The site features beautiful, high-quality video content and a smartphone app to let you test your cunnilingus skills in an innovative new way.
Check it out at OMGYES.com
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There’s Help for Women Who Can’t Achieve Orgasm – Health Essentials from Cleveland Clinic
We don’t often think about what needs to happen to go from arousal to a satisfying orgasm. Your mind needs to stay clear and focused, your nerves sensitive and blood needs to flow to all the right places. There’s a mental, emotional and physical aspect to sex, and unfortunately a variety of problems can interfere.
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Many
women find they cannot climax during penile-vaginal sex. If a woman has never
climaxed in her adult life, we call it primary orgasmic dysfunction. If she had
been able to climax in the past, but now finds it difficult or impossible, we
call it secondary orgasmic dysfunction.
Only 10% of women easily climax. Most women are in the remaining 80 to 90%. I see many women in my practice who feel relief just to know they are “normal” when they have trouble climaxing with just vaginal sex but can climax with direct clitoral stimulation. It’s unfortunate that many women think they are not normal if they cannot climax solely through vaginal intercourse. Most women can not! It is important to relax and know that you are normal.
Do you know where your erogenous zones are?
To
help with being able to climax, it is important for a woman to know where her
erogenous zones are. She should also communicate about them with her partner.
Various parts of a woman’s body respond to touch and stimulation, such as the
face, lips and neck.
A
woman’s most sensitive erogenous zones include:
- Clitoris
- “G-spot,” the anterior part of the lower vagina
- Breasts
- “ClitGVa,” the clitoris, G-spot and the vagina
Women
who have been able to climax without difficulty in the past but now are having
trouble need an evaluation. I take their history and then I do a physical and a
hormonal and medication evaluation.
Often, one or more of the following is a culprit:
• Medicines, including antidepressants/selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRI)
• Hormonal deficiency (This is very common, especially after menopause)
• Partner issues
• Medical problems, such as diabetes and hypertension
• Lack of exercise
• Smoking
• Drinking
• Sleep disorders
Treating orgasmic dysfunction
To
treat orgasmic dysfunction, off-label oral prescription bupropion can help.
Viagra may also work. In particular, it can work as an off-label treatment to
help women who are on SSRI antidepressants.
Some doctors will also prescribe off-label “Scream Cream” made by a compounding pharmacy. This cream includes a variety of topical medications. When a woman applies it to the clitoris, it increases blood flow and helps promote an orgasm.
Women can use this cream alone or they can use it along with a stimulating device, such as the Intensity™ device, which is an FDA-approved pelvic electrical stimulating device. It stimulates the pelvic muscles that contract with climax and also provides direct clitoral stimulation. There is another device that is FDA-approved to treat orgasmic dysfunction, called the Eros device, which is only available through a doctor’s prescription.
It’s
important to note that there are other problems, besides orgasmic dysfunction,
that can affect women sexually and cause female sexual dysfunction. They
include low libido, painful sex, difficulty being aroused and even sexual aversion.
All of these issues are real. They can cause women a lot of distress and affect their relationships. But the good news is that treatments are available, which many women don’t realize.
By: Holly L. Thacker, MD
Can’t Orgasm? Here’s Help for Women
About 10% of women have never had an orgasm — either with a partner or during masturbation. And quite a few of them have found their way into my therapy practice. That’s when I tell these women the good news: It is possible to learn to be orgasmic.
The first and most important lesson is to practice developing a balance of tension and relaxation during sexual activity. But, my women clients ask, how can they be both tense and relaxed at the same time? It’s a good question, and here is my two-part answer:
How to Have an Orgasm Step 1: Tense Up
The type of tension that helps women reach orgasm is muscle tension (myotonia). Many women have the mistaken impression that they should relax and “just lie there” because they’ve heard that relaxation during sex is important. But it turns out that muscle tension is often necessary for an orgasm. In my experience, the majority of women learn to have their first orgasm by incorporating a fair amount of leg, abdominal, and buttock tension.
Continued
Not surprisingly, women report that the most orgasm-inducing muscle contractions are in their lower pelvis. These are the same muscles you squeeze to stop the flow of urine midstream (a conscious contraction of this group is called a Kegel exercise).
What is the connection between tensing muscle groups and having an orgasm? Arousal. Contracting (or tensing) certain muscles increases blood flow throughout the body and often to the genital area. And arousal, of course, is the road map that helps lead most women to orgasm.
How to Have an Orgasm Step 2: Wind Down
So, where’s the relaxation part of this equation? In the brain. During sex, a woman should be focused simply on feeling the sensations of the stimulation.
Have a hard time relaxing? Think of a Times Square billboard in which words stream into view from the left-hand side to the right edge, and then disappear off the screen. During sex, many women find it helpful to program their own Times Square news crawl with a repetitive mantra such as “I can take as long as I want” or “This really feels great” on their mental silent radio. It keeps the brain occupied — but with a thought that will encourage sexual arousal rather than with a nervous, negative thought that might decrease arousal.
After this first lesson, I send my clients away with a homework assignment. During sex, they are to tense up their muscles and let their minds go silent. This technique takes practice, but it can work over time. And more often than not, my clients return to a future session with their own good news to report.
Can’t Orgasm? The Problem Could Be Medical
Therapy can help some women having difficulty with orgasm. For others, a medical condition or side effects from a medication may be causing the problem. Visit your doctor to rule out these causes. Options for treatment include the following:
- An FDA-approved device called Eros helps increase blood flow to the genitals.
- Over-the-counter creams may increase sensitivity and help a woman reach orgasm, although these are not FDA-approved. As always, talk to your doctor before starting any treatment.
Originally published in the March/April 2008 issue ofWebMD the Magazine.
14 Facts About Female Orgasms — Surprising Facts About Women’s Orgasms
Psst — you over there. Guess what? We’re going to talk about orgasms. Specifically, the female orgasm. Why? Well, there are probably a lot of things about the female orgasm that you probably don’t know. Some of these facts about orgasms revolve around their mental and physical benefits, like an improved immune system and reduced pain. Some are facts that debunk all-too-common myths, like condoms prevent you from climaxing. (P.S. – They don’t.) Regardless, knowing everything there is to know about the female orgasm can make the experience much more pleasurable.
So now’s the time to expand your knowledge. This is everything you ever wanted to know about an orgasm, and hopefully your next sexual experience will be your best one yet.
1. Orgasms can relieve pain.
When you have a headache, it’s pretty common to go to bed. But you shouldn’t be sleeping. “There is some evidence that orgasms can relieve all kinds of pain, including pain from arthritis, pain after surgery, and even pain during childbirth,” Lisa Stern, R.N., a nurse practitioner who works with Planned Parenthood in Los Angeles, tells Woman’s Day. This is largely due to the body’s release of oxytocin during orgasm, a chemical that facilitates bonding, relaxation, and other positive emotional states, she explains. Although the pain relief is often short-lived at about 8 to 10 minutes, Stern says that past research indicates even thinking about sex can help alleviate pain.
2. Using a condom doesn’t hamper your orgasm.
A lot of people think that because sex can often feel better without a condom that their orgasm will too. But that’s not the case. “Women are equally likely to experience orgasm with or without a condom,” Debby Herbenick, Ph.D., a research scientist at Indiana University and author of Because It Feels Good, tells Woman’s Day. “In fact, condoms may help a couple spend more time having sex, as a man doesn’t have to ‘pull out’ quickly if he’s worried about ejaculating too soon.” If he’s resistant to wearing a condom because of lack of sensation, consider manual or oral stimulation before intercourse.
3. It’s not easy for women to reach orgasm.
According to a 2018 study, 10 to 40% of women report having difficulty or an inability to reach orgasm. So your inability to hit your climax is actually more common than you think. The issue is that there are so many reasons why a person may not be able to orgasm, that it’s hard to pinpoint your exact cause. Reasons range from stress and anxiety to medical issues and past trauma, according to the study. Another bit of research also found that age, arousal difficulty, and lubrication were the top reasons why women couldn’t orgasm. Regardless of the reasons, it’s a good idea to talk to your doctor to rule out any other underlying roadblocks — be them physical or emotional.
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4. The G-spot may not actually exist.
“The G-spot is a controversial topic,” Dr. Jodie Horton, MD, an advisor for Love Wellness, tells Woman’s Day. In 2012, a study declared that the G-spot was, in fact, real, and that it was composed of an upper pole (or head) and a lower pole (tail). It also stated that it contained a sac with walls that resembled erectile tissue. But a 2017 dissection of 13 female cadavers found no such structure. Regardless, according to one study, more than half of women believe that the G-spot does exist.
So what are people talking about when they talk about the G-spot? Well, one study suggests that the squishy tissue you feel when you insert your fingers against the inner wall of your vagina is your urethra tissue, which is surrounded by the arms of your clitoris. So we may all just be stimulating our clitoris internally when we’re using our G-spot vibes. “It is believed that stimulation of the G-spot can indirectly stimulate the clitoris and vagina, leading to intense pleasure,” Dr. Horton says. “At the same time, other females are not able to find it.”
One thing that is certain, though? If it feels good for you, it can’t be bad. So if you feel that stimulation of the part of your body that may or may not be your G-spot is getting you off, keep on stimulating!
5. Orgasm gets better with age.
There are plenty of things to gripe about when it comes to age, but your sex life isn’t one of them. It turns out that as you get older, the quality and frequency of orgasms can improve, Dr. Herbenick says. “[A recent survey showed that] 61 percent of women ages 18 to 24 experienced orgasm the last time they had sex, 65 percent of women in their 30s did, and about 70 percent of women in their 40s and 50s did.”
With age comes more confidence and trust in the bedroom, which can allow a woman to relax more and truly enjoy their orgasm.
wundervisuals
Although the survey didn’t indicate why exactly orgasms become easier with age, Dr. Herbenick says that it’s likely because older women are more sexually experienced, have more confidence in the bedroom, and aren’t afraid to speak up for what they want. There may also be more trust and intimacy involved if you’re in a long-term relationship, which can allow a woman to relax more and embrace the ride on the way to orgasm.
6. Mixing things up can help.
If you have trouble reaching orgasm during intercourse, consider switching things up, Dr. Herbenick says. “It is significantly easier for women to experience orgasm when they engage in a variety of sex acts as opposed to just one act,” she says. “For example, vaginal sex plus oral sex would be linked to a higher likelihood of orgasm than either one of them alone.” And remember, intercourse isn’t the only way to reach an orgasm — many women get off by using sex toys, either with their partners or totally solo.
7. Your self-esteem matters.
Research shows that how a woman feels about herself — including her genitalia — is linked to the quality of her orgasms. “As a women’s health clinician, I can vouch for the fact that every vagina looks different and there is no ‘perfect’ way for a vagina to look,” Stern says. “As long as your vagina is pain-free and you don’t have any abnormal discharge, sores or other medical problems, you can consider yourself healthy and normal.”
To increase your confidence (and, therefore, your orgasm potential), Stern says it’s important to talk to yourself in a positive, healthy manner, especially when thinking about your body. One way to do that? Look in the mirror every day and say one thing you like about your body. (No repeats from the day before!) Another trick: Pull out a hand mirror and take a look at what’s going on downstairs. Getting to know every part of yourself is the first step toward feeling confident all over.
8. It may take more than 10 minutes to orgasm.
Many women take longer to climax than their male partners, and that’s perfectly normal, Stern says. In fact, most women require at least 13 minutes of sexual activity to climax. “If you find that your partner often reaches orgasm before you do, there are ways to help him slow down, like applying firm pressure around the base of the penis,” she says. If premature ejaculation is a concern, Stern recommends seeing a primary care doctor or urologist to find alternative techniques that can help.
9.
You may not need genital stimulation to orgasm.
If you’ve ever felt supremely turned on and close to the edge of orgasm without vaginal or clitoral stimulation, you’re not alone. There are literal support groups online for people who experience “spontaneous orgasm” — or orgasms that occur without genital stimulation. The reason for why this happens is unclear, but a recent study out of Rutgers University may have a clue.
Nipple stimulation, and other forms of forepaly, could help you reach orgasm.
Westend61
Using brain scans, researchers tracked which areas of the brain lit up during types of stimulation. And while the genital-sensing brain areas in women roughly corresponded to the same areas in men, something else happened when they got to the nipples. When they were stimulated, the sensation traveled to the same part of the brain as the vagina, clitoris, and cervix, lighting up the same way that it would if those areas were being stimulated. Researchers have a reason for why this may happen: Stimulating the nipples releases oxytocin, which is the same hormone that triggers uterus contractions during labor. So nipple stimulation might trigger uterine contractions, which then trigger the genital area of the brain.
10. More than 50% of women have faked an orgasm — and that’s OK.
Guess what? There are a lot of women who fake orgasms. In fact, one study found that 58.8% of women have faked an orgasm at one point in their life. And the reasons are all over the place: 57.1% wanted their partner to feel successful, 44.6% wanted sex to end, and 37.7% liked their partner and didn’t want them to feel bad. “Expressing our sexual needs has become taboo, especially for women,” Dr. Horton says. “Society has put a lot of pressure on women to have an orgasm, which can lead to performance anxiety and guilt.”
There is good news, though. That same study found that the most common reasons for no longer faking orgasms were all positives: 46.6% felt more comfortable with sex, whether or not an orgasm occurred; 35.3% felt more confident in themselves; and 34% felt like their partner accepted them and is happy with them even if they don’t have an orgasm. “Having an open conversation about how we want to be touched and what gives us pleasure can lead to increased satisfaction in the bedroom,” Dr. Horton says. “It’s important to empower women to have orgasms on their own terms, but also understand that you can be satisfied sexually without having one, too.”
11.
Cannabis may help you orgasm, whether you apply it topically or ingest it.
Although there isn’t a ton of research on how cannabis affects your sex life (it is, after all, still a schedule I drug in the US), there is a lot of compelling evidence to suggest that it might help increase libido and the ability to orgasm. For one, cannabis is a vasodilator, which means that it opens blood vessels, increasing blood flow — which also happens when you’re aroused. In women, that is useful, because that blood flow also leads to natural lubrication. One study found that women who used cannabis before sex reported “satisfaction in the sexual domanis of drive, orgasm, lubrication, dyspareunia [pain during penetration], and overall sexual experience.”
In fact, cannabis’ability to blunt painful sensations while also enhancing pleasurable ones may give hope to those who suffer from ailments like vulvodynia and vaginismis.There is also evidence that points to cannabis can be useful in helping sexual assault survivors reclaim their sex life, as evidenced by its possible treatment for anxiety disorders. And even though the research is lacking, anecdotal evidence isn’t. Surveys show that plenty of folks are already leaning on cannabis to help enhance their time in the bedroom.
12.
There are four stages of the female orgasm.
According to Dr. Horton, orgasm is broken down into four distinct stages: excitement, plateau, the actual orgasm, and the resolution. “The excitement phase is when arousal builds. The plateau phase happens when arousal increases and levels off,” says Dr. Horton. “This leads to the third phase: orgasm, which is the intense feeling of pleasure, followed by resolution, when arousal diminishes.” But some research shows that women may not go through those phases in that exact order. For example, you may cycle through excitement and plateau a few times before reaching orgasm.
The four stages are what allow women to have multiple orgasms.
filadendron
And according to Dr. Horton, it’s possible to have more orgasms after the resolution phase, which is the one spot where women edge out over men. They need a rest after their resolution phase.
13.
The most common type of orgasm comes from clitoral stimulation, not penetration.
If you’re not someone who can orgasm from vaginal penetration only, you’re not alone. In fact, one study showed that only 6% of women said they always had an orgasm during penetrative sex. Another study showed that 36.6% of women needed clitorial stimulation in order to achieve orgasm. There are a bunch of ways that you can incorporate clitoral stimulation into penetrative sex, though. Positions like doggy or woman-on-top allow easy access to your clit, so you can stroke it while you’re having sex. And remember — you don’t have to have an orgasm during sex, either. Try some extended foreplay to get you off before sex actually kicks off. That way you can just relax and enjoy yourself.
14.
One study suggest that lesbians are orgasming more than all other women.
You’ve probably heard of the orgasm gap between men and women — but there’s also, apparently, an orgasm gap between lesbians and bisexual and heterosexual women. One study showed that 86% of lesbians reported usually having an orgasm, while only 66% of bisexual women and 65% of heterosexual women reported the same. And that, apparently, has to do with the type of sex they’re having. That same study found that women who orgasmed more frequently had sexual encounters that included deep kissing, manual genital stimulation, and/or oral sex in addition to vaginal intercourse. In other words? More focus on foreplay!
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Why is it harder for people with vaginas to orgasm?
How come some girls don’t come at all? And guys always do. I don’t really understand. My sis said is becuz guys “are at their peak” .She says it takes a while for girls and they will start “coming” when they get a little older like 20 or 25. Please help i’m really confused!
People with vaginas may feel like they have an orgasm – aka cum or climax – less easily or less often than people with penises.
Many people with vaginas have trouble reaching orgasm through penis-in-vagina sex alone. Most of those people have an easier time with orgasm through having more variety in stimulation, like touching or rubbing of their clitoris, oral sex, vaginal sex, etc. So if you’re having trouble with orgasms, you may want to try different types of sexual stimulation to see what feels good for you.
If you’re not sure what would feel good for you, masturbation is a great way to get to know your body. Once you know, you can communicate that to your partner to help sex feel good.
Keep in mind, everyone’s body responds differently, and every person has different preferences for how they like to be sexual with someone. That’s why communicating with your partner is very important. Our partners can’t read our minds, so it’s important to be clear about what feels good and what doesn’t, and what we do and don’t want to do.
You may find as you get older that you have an easier time having orgasms because you have more knowledge of what you like sexually, and because you’re more comfortable communicating with your partners about what you like and don’t like.
And people with penises don’t always have orgasms — it’s not uncommon for them to have trouble with orgasms, or getting or keeping an erection. Sexual pleasure has a lot to do with emotion and relaxation. It’s harder to enjoy sex or orgasm if you’re uncomfortable, self-conscious, or don’t feel quite right about what’s going on.
Learn more about orgasm and masturbation.
Tags:
orgasms
90,000 How to bring a girl to orgasm
3 main myths about sex
The penis is the main tool for satisfying a woman
You probably used to think that the bigger the penis, the better, and the longer you hold out, the more pleasure she will get. This is all a lie. Here’s the truth.
Researchers asked hundreds of women a direct question about what matters most to them during intercourse, and none of the participants mentioned penis size. Instead, women said they were crazy about men who care about their pleasure.
Good sex ends with simultaneous orgasm
This is how they show in the movies: a man energetically enters a woman, and – yes, yes, more! – they both have a quick and fabulous orgasm. In fact, simultaneous orgasms are a myth.
To bring your partner to orgasm, you must focus on her sensations, and to experience it yourself – completely immerse yourself in yours. As you can imagine, it is difficult to combine it. Your partner can experience pleasure both before you and after.And this is much more convenient than achieving simultaneous discharge.
To achieve orgasm, women need intercourse
According to the most optimistic estimates, only 15% of women can have an orgasm as a result of intercourse. The other 85% need clitoral stimulation.
Data from anonymous surveys conducted by the author of the course on female sexuality Lori Mintz among women over the past few years
The clitoris is the key to female orgasm. This proves once again the fact that only 1.5% of women masturbate with an object in the vagina.Another 12% do the same while touching their clitoris. And the rest – a whopping 86.5% – enjoy purely through clitoral stimulation. So the main thing to remember is that frictions lead you to orgasm, but not your partner. Her point of pleasure is the clitoris.
How to do everything correctly
With the myths sorted out, let’s get to the point. You have a date, and you really want the girl to remember it for the rest of her life. You will have to go through three stages: how to prepare, lay out in bed, and then consolidate the impression.Let’s start with the first one.
Prepare
Find out where the clitoris is
A recent study showed that 25% of men cannot find this organ on the diagram. Check yourself and take a closer look at female physiology.
Illustration from the book “How a Woman Wants”
If the pictures do not inspire you, you can watch a video about female masturbation, only not from porn, but realistic. Female sexuality expert Lori Mintz recommends watching any (or all) of the 50+ educational videos on OMGYes.com. In them you will see 12 ways of clitoral masturbation.
Agree to have sex
It often happens that one partner wants to have sex and the other wants to prepare for an exam, work, watch TV, or just go to bed early. Agree on a sexual adventure in advance – then the girl will be ready for what awaits her, and it will be easier for you to achieve your goal.
Get rid of stress
For 80–90% of people (both women and men), stress reduces interest, and in almost all it reduces the ability to enjoy.Even among those 10–20% of us who, in a state of nervous tension, have an increased interest in sex.
If your partner works from morning till night, pulls a mortgage and three children, experiences constant stress, you can forget about orgasm. Therefore, before moving on to bed activities, take 20 minutes or even an hour to relax in a comfortable environment.
Ask the girl what helps her to recover. A bath, a walk, sports, cooking, heart-to-heart conversations, a glass of wine – whatever, as long as it works.
Create a context
Feminine pleasure is closely related to context – external circumstances and internal state. What exactly tunes a woman to sex depends on herself. But usually the ideal sex context = low stress + partner admiration + erotic setting. So candles, music and your irresistible appearance will not be superfluous.
Get down to business
Allocate 20 minutes to warm up
Modern sex scenarios focus mainly on what you and your partner do between your legs, but most women take about 20 minutes to warm up (kissing , caress).
Ladies need time to be aroused and develop enough lubrication so that touching the genitals becomes pleasant.
Here are some ways to warm up:
- Kiss each other on the lips – in every possible way (softly, persistently, with a tongue, without it).
- Kiss each other on the neck, ears and other parts of the face, while remaining dressed.
- Iron and fondle each other through clothing.
- Roll over the bed while wearing your clothes.
- Undress yourself or undress each other.
- Iron, kiss and caress your partner’s breasts.
- Play with her nipples by rolling them gently between your toes, sucking, pulling or pinching if it turns her on.
- Iron and kiss each other’s naked bodies without stopping anywhere for a long time. Many women say they like it when their partner teases them for a while, touching their genitals, and then starting to fondle them again in other places.
You can also take a shower or a bath together, laugh, joke and fool around.Show your imagination!
Treat her clitoris
When both of you are warm enough, move on to the main course – clitoral stimulation. Do this as much as necessary. In general, women need 15 to 45 minutes to orgasm. Interesting statistic: If you spend 20 minutes or more on clitoral stimulation, about 92% of your partners will have an orgasm.
Tip: Start by gently touching her clitoris and let her tell you when you can increase the pressure.The clitoris is a very delicate organ, so it is better when she says “More” rather than “Oops!”
Find out what she likes
Nerves are located differently in women. Therefore, there is no universal recipe for pleasure: everyone likes their own kind of touch.
To complicate matters even more, we add that the stimulation required for a woman to orgasm may vary at different times (for example, depending on the phase of the menstrual cycle). So only one thing will help bring a woman to discharge – the desire to listen to her and hear.
How do you know what a woman wants today? Here are three ways:
- Just ask. Conversations during sex can be very short, but they can make a big difference in the situation. For example, you say, “Tell me what you like,” or “I want you to tell me if this is right for you,” or “I want to please you. Show that you are pleased. ”
- Let her fingers speak. Place your hand over your partner’s hand, signaling her that you want her to show how she likes to be touched.When she does, follow her instructions (where, with what force, how exactly).
- Listen. Rapid breathing, increasing groans and requests to continue usually tell you that you are heading in the right direction. But if the girl does not show emotions, most likely something is wrong, but she is embarrassed to say about it. In this case, return to methods 1 and 2.
Experience an orgasm
You can first bring your partner to orgasm by stimulating the clitoris, and then go on to sexual intercourse and get your portion of pleasure, or vice versa.Do not strive to experience an orgasm at the same time – remember that this is a myth. Researchers even believe that it is undesirable for partners to achieve release in one moment, since this deprives the pleasure of watching and feeling the partner’s orgasm.
Enjoy the pleasant aftertaste
Talk after sex
Many couples find it helpful to “process the information” right after sex. This will help make it better next time. Ask the girl what she liked the most and what you can do better next time.Just do not make claims: if there are serious problems, it is better to discuss them outside the bedroom doors.
Stay close
After sex, many women want to prolong intimacy: cuddle, chat or just fall asleep together. What you should definitely not do is turn your back to your partner or immediately call a taxi.
Stay close and be attentive. Remember that showing caring excites women far more than penis size and sophistication in love affairs.
The article was prepared based on the materials of the books:
- “The Point of Pleasure”, Lori Mintz – a journey into the world of female orgasm, debunking the biggest lie about sex.
- “How a Woman Wants”, Emily Nagoski – Scientific answers to questions about the female body and sexuality.
How to bring a girl to orgasm?
This question was submitted by our reader. You can also ask your question to Lifehacker – if it is interesting, we will definitely answer.
How to bring a girl to orgasm?
Sergey Sartakov
Amina Nazaralieva
First, a little theory. Our sex drive and arousal are influenced by two pedals: the gas and the brake. Lazy fantasies that it would be nice to turn on porn or cuddle are 10 kilometers per hour, and 200 kilometers per hour is a sure movement to orgasm.
If you are driving 30 km per hour and even slightly applied the brake, this may be enough to make driving further uninteresting.And if you drive 200 km per hour and slow down to 190, not reaching orgasm, the girl may still think: “Damn, I rode great.”
In achieving orgasm there is an emotional part and a technical one, let us consider each in more detail.
Emotional part
The factors that affect the gas and brakes depend on the preferences and characteristics of the partner. For some, it is bad breath. For others, it can be the use of violence, thoughts of cheating, an important phone call, turning on the light, worrying about your own body, crying a child, fatigue, stress at work, illness.Or offensive words spoken by a partner: insults, devaluation, unflattering comments. It is extremely rare – an erection that is missing from a partner. An important point – the pain, if abruptly done wrong, scratched.
One of the factors that pulls on the brakes is safety concerns. It can be associated with domestic or sexual abuse in the past or in a current relationship. This makes the partner tense and fearful.
Contraception is the second common cause of concern for women: if not, it is unreliable or protects against pregnancy, but not against sexually transmitted infections.By increasing the level of safety, you can help your partner to relax and accelerate as much as possible.
Factors that increase arousal are also different for everyone. Someone is aroused by the thought of threesome sex, others are dispersed by a specific Cooney technique, and someone loves to have sex in front of witnesses.
And other girls will be excited by the maximum security, trust, care and everything that confirms that everything is fine in your relationship. That is, everything that happened before you were naked in bed.
The most difficult question is how to understand what a particular girl is hitting the gas best of all. We do not know in advance. We can find out statistically that a certain group of women prefers this and that. You will have to figure out the rest yourself – by talking with the girl. She may know, but she is shy and expects you to take the initiative and ask. And if the girl has little experience, then masturbation and exploration of her body alone or with you will help her.
You need to learn to speak directly about your desires and unwillingness.Most women will benefit from this. And most men will benefit from a little less blind confidence that everything is more or less the same for women.
We got to the cornerstone of any sexual encounter – the issue of consent. Sex is best approached with a beginner’s mind, especially with a new partner. But not only that: the habitual partner’s mood, body condition, emotional and mental state, and the level of fatigue can also change.
Approach a girl as if you are seeing her for the first time and do not know exactly what she will like right now.Be prepared to ask with curiosity, respect, and a willingness to hear no and back off if there is a hint.
You should doubt that you know in advance and read all the signals of women correctly. In your actions, rely only on “yes”, which is said with enthusiasm and really leaves no doubt that the person wants it.
Technical
A more banal and traditional side, which is reflected in most sex trainings, is the technical one, about how to directly interact with the genitals.
Remember – the clitoris is all over the head. If we are talking about orgasm, then most women do not need a member in the vagina to experience an orgasm. It’s enough that your hands, lips and maybe a vibrator will do to her clitoris.
At the same time, only a little more than a quarter of women are able to experience an orgasm only from the penetration of the penis. Most need additional stimulation and this is completely normal. This usually involves changing your position so that the clitoris is accessible to your or her fingers.Often this is a spoon pose or doggy style. The clitoris can also be stimulated not with fingers, but with a vibrator that is comfortable to hold during coitus – it will definitely bring you to orgasm.
It is also important to remember that there is no need to immediately rush to the visible part of the clitoris, it can even be painful. Most girls prefer a neat and slow approach to this area. The clitoris is also stimulated when you fondle the areas closest to its visible part: the anal area, vagina, vulva, labia majora or labia minora.
If the orgasm hasn’t happened, that’s okay too. You don’t have to cum at the same time. It is believed that it is good if the partner finished first, but if you finished earlier, you still have hands, lips, toys to bring her to orgasm if she wants to. Conversely, in the same way, a girl can help her partner come if he wants to. I emphasize this because not always and not all people want to cum. Many people feel that they are too tired, and then the race for orgasm can turn into torture.
People who have the belief that every sex should end with an orgasm often try to get it out at any cost. Because they love their partner very much or it is important for them that everyone must have an orgasm. This often leads to the fact that partners fake an orgasm, so that everything is over quickly or so as not to offend the lover. Don’t do that. Sex is pleasure in general, and orgasm is optional, but very enjoyable.
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How to properly bring a woman to orgasm
This is not an easy question.Unlike men, the mechanism for triggering orgasm in a woman’s body is very, very complex. It includes not only the mechanical part (rubbed – got the result), but also the emotional and even aesthetic. To properly bring to orgasm, you have to work hard. No wonder a significant number of the fair sex consider the orgasm itself to be something like an urban legend.
Are you ready to convince the crowds of dissatisfied women? And do you need it? Everyone will have to answer this question on their own.And there is nothing seditious in a negative answer. Our world is rapidly ceasing to be patriarchal, everyone talks about equality. And if in order to achieve a result, the parties need to make a different amount of effort, well, maybe one of them is not at all shameful to cheat.
Foreplay
So, the preparatory procedures. That in which a man does not feel the need at all, and if he suddenly receives foreplay, then only to the extent to achieve an erection.Not so in a complex and confusing female world.
The main erogenous points of your partner should not be ignored. And this is by no means just the chest and vaginal area. Actually, this is where you need to go in the second stage, immediately preceding penetration. And you can bring a woman to orgasm without vaginal contact.
Earlobes, hollow under the knee, tailbone, neck … There is simply no universal map.You will have to find each point on your own, having carried out difficult and, as a rule, rather lengthy surveys. It sometimes takes a year or two of constant practice to bring a wife to orgasm.
Special technicians
Do not look for universal answers to the question of how to bring a woman to orgasm. The most popular advice will be extremely vague: attentiveness, empathy, tenderness, creating a romantic atmosphere and closing the mortgage issue. As soon as you see a literally numbered list of activities somewhere, know that you are being deceived.The authors of these tips most likely know little about the female orgasm.
The main principle that you need to remember when establishing harmony in sexual life comes down to the knowledge of female physiology. For many mature and experienced men, it becomes a discovery that the energy of frictions, the size of the male genital organ and the duration of the act have nothing to do with the intensity of orgiastic experience.
The fact is that penetration itself stimulates a small part of the sensitive receptors of the female body.The main nerve endings are concentrated not in the depths of the vagina, but in the clitoris. This relatively small process is located at the top of the vagina. It is a detonator that triggers the most acute spasmodic contractions.
Direct stimulation of the clitoris is significantly more effective than penetration of an arbitrarily large penis. That is why the various bridge techniques that involve simultaneous penetration and finger stimulation are so popular.
An amazing discovery: from the point of view of physiologists, the most effective pose can be confidently called the classic one. Yes, yes, for a woman, it is she who is optimal. The missionary position may seem too boring to the satiated egoist, but it will allow you to optimally combine penetration with the massive stimulation of the clitoris, which is carried out by the partner’s pubis during frictions.
Common myths
The two most trashy and most common myths concern the size of the penis in men and the duration of the act.The bigger, the better! And even longer. Everything, as male chimpanzees love. Forget both! These are statements that are not based on anything at all. The best way to bring a girl to orgasm is through education and practice. Therefore: read our website and implement the best of our tips. We promise: everything will work out.
90,000 Scientists have named the most unusual ways to bring a woman to orgasm
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The list includes socks, the smell of cucumbers and the shape of the nose
The British edition of the Daily Mail presented a selection of recent scientific studies on the factors that affect a man’s sexual attractiveness in the eyes of a woman or the likelihood of a woman having an orgasm.Many items in the published list look at least strange, but in most cases the authors of the article refer to specialists who have seriously devoted scientific research to an unusual topic.
As stated in a recent scientific work, socks on a woman’s legs, paradoxically, increase the likelihood that she will have an orgasm during sex. Despite the reputation of socks as an attribute that rather discourages the desire for intimacy, Dutch researchers concluded that without them, women achieve orgasm only 50 percent of the time, and if they are wearing socks – 80 percent.
As stated in other scientific work, women often feel that men with long noses have a lot of testosterone in their bodies, which makes them more likely to succeed in relationships. Also, the fairer sex find an attractive golden skin tone, which, it is stated, can appear if you add a large amount of carrots to your diet.
Another study found that women find men more sexually attractive in T-shirts with a print or just a big T on their chest – according to experts from Nottingham Trent University, this makes a man’s shoulders look wider, and his waist – narrower, due to what the representative of the stronger sex is subconsciously perceived as more athletic.
Perhaps the strangest and in some ways even repulsive pattern was the observation that women are attracted to men like their brothers. However, according to Scottish scientists, there is nothing overly unusual in this, since people, most often, subconsciously strive to continue the race with those who are not too similar to them, but are not too different, so that people who are not relatives, but have there are some similarities with them, they involuntarily attract attention.
Last year, researchers at the University of Vienna concluded that girls are more likely to be sympathetic to a young man if they play music they like. Researchers explain this by the fact that the subconscious interprets the pleasure of hearing for the joy of communicating with a man and, as a result, sympathy for him. At the same time, it is argued that men themselves are less susceptible to this.
It is not only what she sees or hears, but also the smells that she smells that can increase the likelihood that a woman is interested in a man.At the same time, it is argued that during the experiments, the smell of cucumber turned out to be unexpectedly “exciting”.
Two points, to some extent, contradict each other. On the one hand, experts from the UK argue that women (especially those seeking long-term relationships) are more likely to find selfish men who admire themselves more attractive. On the other hand, their colleagues noticed that women find very attractive men who can feel guilty (as the authors of the second study suggested, a guilty expression on a face can give hope, albeit often false, that a man will not do this or that act again).
How to quickly bring a girl to orgasm: jet and vaginal
A woman’s body contains many erogenous zones, the stimulation of which will allow you to achieve a strong orgasm during sex. Any man wants to be an ideal sexual partner, therefore he is looking for new ways to satisfy a woman and give maximum pleasure.
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G-spot, stimulation of which leads to jet orgasm.
Having learned the basic oral techniques and all sensitive areas on the female body, you can easily become one.Learn the basic rules and secrets to help you bring a woman to a strong orgasm.
How to bring a girl to a jet orgasm
Female and male organisms are arranged in different ways. If it is practically not difficult to arouse a man, then the situation with a woman is much more complicated. Any little thing can affect her condition and prevent her from relaxing. There are several types of orgasm: vaginal, clitoral, jet. It is the features of the latter that we want to discuss now.
Jet orgasm is considered the most difficult to achieve 90 140. Outwardly, it looks almost like ejaculating a member in the form of a strong jet. When squirting, up to 60 milliliters of fluid are released. If it occurs unexpectedly, it can be embarrassing for both partners, as the clear liquid is easily confused with urine.
To bring a woman to a jet orgasm, you need:
- Intimate environment . The girl should relax as much as possible, so light candles, turn on slow music, prepare aromatic oils, etc.
- Napkins or towel. Prepare them so that in case of a positive result, keep the bed from getting wet and use them.
- Lubricant. Provides unhindered penetration into the vagina.
- Foreplay. Before you bring your partner to squirt, you need to warm her up with your fingers, say gentle words, kiss and do an erotic massage.
Ejaculation occurs due to stimulation of the G-spot, which is located in the vagina on the anterior wall.This point is an accumulation of nerve endings, and its stimulation gives a strong jet orgasm. The girl should lie on her back and spread her legs wide. You can also lean on your knees and elbows.
Gently insert two fingers (middle and index) into the vagina, with the palm facing up. Now bend your fingers a little towards the hand and press on the inner wall.
In this case, you can use your thumb to stimulate the outer wall, and the other hand to stimulate the clitoris.Listen to the feelings of a woman – some love sensual unhurried penetrations, others go crazy with sharp and quick movements. Remember not to stop or slow down – no matter how hard it is for you, keep the intensity and don’t slow down.
Doggy-style pose is one of the most effective for quick orgasm.
When the squirt occurs, a clear liquid will come out of the urethra in a strong stream, and the girl will feel strong waves throughout her body. The substance is secreted from the Skene’s glands, which are located next to the urethra.
How to quickly bring a girl to orgasm
According to statistics, about 25 percent of the fair sex have never experienced an orgasm during sex, while another 25 percent of women fake it. There are many ways to help you quickly give the girl the desired pleasure.
- It’s important to start with foreplay every time. Foreplay will help your lady forget about all worries or her own complexes, relax and enjoy.Caress and kiss her until you feel the vagina is wet.
- Try oral sex, which is considered one of the most effective ways to satisfy a girl quickly. For some, cunnilingus is the only possible way. Walk slowly along the entire body and move to the intimate area. First, lick her external genitals, then smoothly go deeper, penetrating inside with your tongue. Bite lightly on the labia, suck on the clitoris, and use your tongue in circular motions.
- You can combine oral sex with finger stimulation. Fold your middle and index fingers together, lick the clitoris and slowly insert them into the vagina. With your other hand, you can caress your body, such as your inner thighs or your chest. Listen to her moans – whether she likes your actions.
- If you want to give your girl a strong and vivid experience, take the risk of trying G-spot stimulation. Start with clitoral stimulation and move inside the vagina.Take a position with your fingers at 11 o’clock, and you will feel a small bump. It is this place that is called point G.
- Stimulate the point with quick and even slightly sharp movements, press it like a button. Continue at the same intensity until a burst of liquid occurs.
Some women find it difficult to get an orgasm during vaginal sex.
Experts identify 3 popular poses, try them and the result will be provided!
- Horsewoman. Lie on your back, the woman should sit on top and wrap her legs around you. Help her pick up the pace and correct her movements. In this position, you will be able to hold out much longer. You can also change the position slightly so that the woman sits on the penis with her back to you.
- Doggy Style. A woman is kneeling in front of you, you stand behind. The undisputed advantage of the position is the direct stimulation of the G-spot and good intensity. You can also caress her clitoris with your hand along the way.
- Bridge. Begin intercourse in a standard missionary position, then kneel down and lift the girl’s pelvis. This position also directly stimulates point G.
How to bring a girl to orgasm with your fingers
A penis is not the only tool for a woman to reach an orgasm. The use of hands by a guy during sex usually occurs during foreplay. The ability to excite and satisfy your partner with gentle hand movements is very important.
Finger stimulation of the clitoris and G-spot.
Before starting the act, make sure the girl is horny enough. If there is no natural lubrication, inserting fingers into the vagina is meaningless. It is also important to follow the rules of hygiene by washing your hands with soap and water before having sex. Trim your nails to avoid unpleasant sensations and scratches on the woman. Most often, orgasm is achieved by such movements: horizontal, vertical, circular. Do not forget to caress the girl, kiss and massage the clitoris.
- Caressing the clitoris and vagina. A full orgasm is possible when you place your palm on your pubis and use your thumb to gently massage the clitoris. Simultaneously with the second hand, make forward movements, gradually increasing the tempo. Thus, your home can achieve a double orgasm – vaginal and clitoral.
- Laski G. Not every man decides to experiment, because very few women have felt the power of orgasm from stimulating the G-spot in their lives.Put your girlfriend in a comfortable position, slightly spread her legs and give oral sex. After that, extend your index and middle fingers, insert into the vagina and bend. As soon as you find a small bump and make a forward motion.
- Vaginal and anal sex. If you are in the most trusting relationship with a woman, add variety to your sex life. You will need to use both hands: start stimulating the clitoris with one, the thumb of the other hand into the vagina, and the index finger into the anus.Move forward until your girlfriend feels a strong surge of orgasm.
How to bring a girl to orgasm with the tongue
An experienced lover is the man who thinks in bed not only about himself. Many do not resort to oral sex, as they consider them insignificant in terms of achieving orgasm.
This is all prejudice! It is after a blowjob or cunnilingus that you can truly trust your partner and get an unforgettable orgasm. Here are the general rules that any man who decides on oral sex should take into account:
- Caress the clitoris with the entire length of the tongue , not just the tip.Combine slow and heavy movements, lick in any direction.
- In addition to the clitoris, there are other erogenous zones that should not be forgotten 90 140 b. Many people like it when a man licks the labia and even sticks his tongue into the vagina.
- Use your lips as well as your tongue. Suck, nibble and lick. If you get tired, you can help yourself with your fingers.
- It is important to ask your partner if she wants oral sex. Some girls are very shy, so they can protest and just get scared.
- You can understand when you approach orgasm by the moans of the lady . Very often, after cunnilingus, a jet orgasm occurs – do not be surprised if this happens.
You can do cunnilingus not only in a standard position, but also in more sensitive positions:
- A woman sits on your face – you will feel inviting warmth and can quickly bring her to ecstasy.
- She lies on her side with one leg lifted up.
- In position 69 you can please each other with oral sex and merge into a single whole.
How to bring a girl to orgasm with a massage
Most of the stronger sex are fixated on their genitals and their size. However, you are very much mistaken if you believe that success in bed depends on a large penis.
You have already received answers to many questions, learned that the use of hands and tongue is a powerful tool.An equally interesting way is erotic massage.
Preparation for massage includes:
- Study of erogenous zones on the female body.
- Create the right atmosphere to help your partner relax.
- Aromatic oils and massage creams. Remember that they are not recommended for vaginal penetration.
Start the procedure from afar. Massage your arms or legs.Sexologists say that the most powerful erogenous zones are located between the toes. Move to the breast, stroking it gently until the nipples are firm. Smoothly guide your hands to the intimate area, stroke the pubis and “accidentally” touch the clitoris. After a few minutes, vaginal caresses can be performed.
Since there are a lot of nerve endings in the clitoris, treat it carefully and carefully. Exhausted from your caresses, a woman may want penis penetration.You can agree, but otherwise her orgasm will be no less vivid.
Ways to bring a girl to orgasm
Until recently, you thought that there are two indisputable points, the impact on which will make your sex partner experience ecstasy – the G-spot and the clitoris. However, researchers from Turkey have found that there are 4 more zones that are important to know.
Exercising your muscles will result in greater pleasure. They point out that not every woman has every erogenous zone active, but why not check, right?
Point A
Such an erogenous zone, according to statistics, is observed in 11 percent of girls.Insert two fingers into the vagina and slide along the front wall until you feel the cervix. There you will find point A. Once you find the point, apply pressure, move your fingers back and forth, in a circle. If you feel a small lump with a spongy surface, move further 2-3 centimeters, as you stimulate point G.
Point O
The sensitive area occurs in 8 percent of women. So, we told you how to find point G. Once you do this, touch the opposite wall and move inward.Here is the point O, which can replace the sensations of anal sex. If your girlfriend is not ready to let you into the ass, this point, due to its close location with the walls of the anus and a large accumulation of nerve endings, will give a lot of pleasure.
Cervix
The zone is erogenous in 7 percent of girls. The cervix is at a depth of 9-11.5 centimeters, but during arousal it “goes” even further. If nature has endowed you with large sizes, you can reach this area.On the 13-16th day of ovulation, stimulation of the cervix will be especially pleasant for your partner.
Pelvic muscles
More than 12 percent of women enjoy their action. Studies have shown that girls with strong muscles tend to orgasm faster (and much more often!). If the muscles are toned, they will contract non-stop and help relieve tension. Use vaginal balls – they not only strengthen the muscles, but they are very arousing.
Foreplay Technique – Sex Box
If you know how to bring a girl to orgasm, she will agree to anything for you. After all, most men in bed are selfish. The main thing is to do everything quickly and finish yourself. And women are more complicated. They are aroused more slowly, and they do not always get an orgasm.
Therefore, a man who has mastered the mastery of orgasm will be perceived as a SUPER lover!
No one ever forgets such a man.
So, the scenario of how to bring a girl to orgasm.
Remember the first and most important rule.To reach orgasm – a girl must be horny! The prelude cannot be less than 30 minutes long!
At this time we do not climb into panties, we do not enter a member.
We strictly follow the instructions when mastering this process. After understanding the essence and receiving feedback from the girl, it will be possible to proceed to fantasy actions.
Technique step by step
- The girl must be cleaned. And you too. So kissing her during foreplay is pleasant, and the girl does not have a complex, which may somehow not smell right from her.This is the only way she can completely relax.
- Start with erotic conversations. Don’t kiss or touch her. You can bend straight to your ear, breathe in hot breath. Slowly and for a long time tell what exactly you are going to do. Whisper to her that she will have an orgasm and she will be very pleased.
- Do not touch, do not hug or kiss, loosen her arms ,. Don’t let her kiss you – just talk. This unusual action will increase the girl’s arousal.
- Next, start kissing the ear and neck.DO NOT RUSH! Suck on your earlobe lightly, bite, sometimes hard, then suck again. You will quickly find the place on the lobe where it is most enjoyable.
- Then again whisper in your ear with hot breath, then move on to your lips, caress your neck, ears, lips again with your hands.
- You see her arousal – start sucking and biting lightly on her neck – find the most sensitive spot.
- Don’t forget to whisper and caress with the tip of your tongue.
- Sometimes a girl has a very sensitive area down the back of her head.The more it gets hot, the more intensely suck and nibble.
- Then press with your chest while pressing her breasts. By this time she should be aroused, her nipples will become very sensitive.
- You can press your erect member against her – this will also increase her arousal. Just do not try to stick it in quickly – let her feel how you want her, but you are not going to inject anything anywhere.
- She will start to cuddle harder – move your hands to your chest and buttocks.
- Chest with fingers, counterclockwise.Don’t grab it with your whole palm.
- You start from the edges of the chest with your fingers and, making a semicircle, move on to the nipples – you stroke the nipple with your fingertips, then, as it were, you pass the nipples inside the spread fingers, and grab the nipples in motion.
- At the same time, continue kissing your ears, neck and whispering words. Or just breathe hot breath into the neck and ear.
- Hy and cuddle himself with a member, as she is excited stronger and stronger, you can imitate the movements, as in the act.
- Further, you can already clasp the chest with your whole hand and caress it harder.Up to full squeezing. At this stage, you can fiddle with the nipples and squeeze them hard with your fingers. Many girls will experience tremendous pleasure.
- Next, move on to kissing the chest. Lick the nipple from bottom to top, then in a circle. When his arousal intensifies, take the nipple in your mouth, suck and nibble on it, sometimes you can do it hard enough to make her cry out in slight pain, and immediately start sucking and kissing lightly again.
- Smooth the second breast with your hand to the beat. Do not stay in one place for a long time – change the place of kisses.
- Go down – to the stomach and inner thighs. The technique is the same – kiss lightly – suck – bite.
- Hands smooth the buttocks or chest.
- If you do this for a long time, pay attention to her condition, do not let her be active and lead all the action behind her – the girl should reach an extreme degree of excitement. You will understand this by breathing and by the release of a large amount of lubricant. It should be leaking heavily by this time.
- Only then do you move on to the labia.First, touch lightly and again go to the thighs, abdomen, chest, then smooth the outer labia with a full palm, do not push or penetrate inside. Do it also intermittently and slowly, even if the girl asks you to meet or asks to take her.
- After some time it was the turn of the clitoris. With the base of your palm you stroke the clitoris, with your fingers you penetrate inside, stroking it around the circle, then again deeper, again with your finger at the entrance, around the circle, fingers up on the clitoris, stroked both down and deeply inside, again around the circle … actions she can already finish.
These are the principles of foreplay:
– take your time
– gradually increase the pressure
– return to different places many times
DO NOT stop. Don’t invent anything. Just keep the pace.
When it becomes obvious that the movements of your fingers, tongue or penis have finally resonated with her – CONTINUE them without changing the pace.
Having established a constant working regime between her legs, pay attention to other areas of her body.
Kiss, bite, stroke, scratch.
A woman can lose her temper at any moment, even when she feels the ending is approaching. Therefore, additional actions are absolutely necessary)
PS . The girl herself knows how to bring herself to orgasm. Buy her a vibrator and ask her to masturbate and cum in front of you, or on a webcam. Then you will also get an extraordinary sexual sensation.
Try to masturbate together in front of the mirror, always until orgasm.
Another foreplay technique is joint masturbation. It greatly increases arousal and helps the girl to experience an incredible orgasm.
Secrets of foreplay from guru-sex Alex May
If she has an orgasm with you, you can get from her and anal sex, and blowjob with the possibility of cum in mouth, and any other sexual experiments.
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90,000 How to bring a woman to orgasm
Everyone knows that women are much more sensitive than men.But to please a man is easier than a girl. This is because women need sophisticated caresses, exquisite gentle techniques.
According to scientific sources, many women have never reached orgasm. But a woman who does not suffer from frigidity, as a rule, is able to achieve orgasm. The challenge for men is to master the skills that will help deliver it.
Female clitoral orgasm
You can bring your partner to a clitoral orgasm by stimulating her clitoris.The clitoris is the most sensitive organ and any careless touch can cause pain. Pay attention to your partner’s erogenous zones. Prepare her for clitoral stimulation by caressing and kissing her lips and neck. Don’t forget about alluring breasts and captivating hips. All this will contribute to doubling the sensations of a woman from orgasm.
Stimulates the clitoris with gentle circular motions or lightly stroking gentle fingertips. Place your middle and index fingers together, and then start running them in circles around your clitoris.Stimulation should be done at an average pace. The head of the clitoris is very sensitive, direct contact with some women can be painful, while others can be exquisite. Therefore, during manual stimulation, it is necessary to be attentive to the feelings of the partner.
Oral stimulation of the clitoris is also encouraged. Only with cunnilingus should you pay attention to other parts of the genitals. Oral stimulation of the clitoris is carried out by licking and sucking it.Try to gently lick the woman’s external genitals. Accelerate little by little, and move to the inner labia, try to deeply penetrate your tongue into her vagina.
Make small circular movements with your tongue. You can even bite your partner’s labia, suck and kiss her clitoris. During sex, a clitoral orgasm is obtained in a position when the partner lies on a dais, legs apart, and the man, kneeling down, enters his penis into her vagina. At the same time, with his fingers, he stimulates the woman’s clitoris.
Female vaginal orgasm
To achieve this type of orgasm, it is necessary to acquire skills to stimulate point G. This point is a small tubercle, which is located on the front wall of the woman’s vagina, in the position “11.00.” Lay the excited partner on her back, gently insert your finger into her vagina, and feel at the very top on the front wall of the vagina for the G point. It will differ in bulge from the rest of the gentle and smooth surface of the woman’s vagina.
The G-spot is stimulated with the fingers. To do this, the excited partner should be laid on her back and penetrated into her vagina with her ring and middle fingers. Being inside her bosom, you need to bend your fingers in the form of the letter “P” and move them up and down at a fast pace. The G-spot will swell and the woman will reach orgasm, which may be accompanied by female ejaculation (squirt). Stimulation of the G-spot during sex can be carried out in poses when the partner is on all fours and the man enters her from behind, or the woman lies on her stomach, stretching her legs and closing them together, and the man enters her from above.