What Is Virginity & The Hymen?

In This Section

• Virginity

• What happens the first time you have sex?

What’s virginity?

A virgin is someone who’s never had sex. But people define “sex” and “losing virginity” in many different ways.

What does it mean to be a virgin?

A virgin is someone who’s never had sex — but it’s not quite as simple as it seems. That’s because sex means different things to different people, so virginity can mean different things, too.

A lot of people think that having penis-in-vagina sex for the first time is how you lose your virginity. But this leaves lots of people and other types of sex out of the picture.

Some people haven’t had penis-in-vagina sex, but they’ve had other kinds of sex (like oral sex or anal sex) — and they may or may not see themselves as virgins. And there are lesbian, gay, bisexual or pansexual people who may never have penis-in-vagina sex at all. But they probably don’t see themselves as lifelong virgins just because they haven’t had penis-in-vagina sex.

Many people believe rape and sexual assault aren’t sex — it’s only sex if both partners have consent. So if someone was forced or pressured the first time they had vaginal sex, oral sex, or anal sex, they may not see that as “losing their virginity.”

Bottom line: the definition of virginity is complicated, and it’s really up to you to decide what you believe. Some people don’t even care what “virginity” means or think it matters. Stressing about whether you’re a virgin is way less important than how you feel about your sexual experiences. Ask yourself: are you happy with the sexual experiences you’ve had or decided not to have?

What’s a hymen?

The hymen is a thin, fleshy tissue that’s located at the opening of your vagina.

There’s a lot of confusion about hymens out there. Many people think the hymen totally covers the opening of your vagina until it’s stretched open, but that’s not usually the case. Most of the time, hymens naturally have a hole big enough for period blood to come out and for you to use tampons comfortably. Some people are born with so little hymenal tissue that it seems like they don’t have a hymen at all. In rare cases, people have hymens that cover the entire vaginal opening, or the hole in their hymen is very small — they may need to see a doctor for a minor procedure to remove the extra tissue. Just like other parts of our body, hymens are a little different for everyone.

Your hymen can be stretched open the first time you have vaginal sex, which might cause some pain or bleeding. But this doesn’t happen to everyone. And there are other ways that a hymen can be stretched open: riding a bike, doing sports, or putting something in your vagina (like a tampon, finger, or sex toy). Once your hymen is stretched open, it can’t grow back.

Does having a hymen mean you’re a virgin?

Some people believe that you’re not a virgin if your hymen is stretched open. But having a hymen and being a virgin are not the same thing.

Some people are born with hymens that are naturally open. And many other activities besides sex can stretch your hymen. So you can’t tell if someone has had sex by the way their hymen looks or feels.

What’s the average age people lose their virginity?

The average age when people have sex for the first time is 17. Sometimes it may seem like everybody at your school is doin’ it, but that’s usually not true. Only about half of high school students have ever had vaginal sex. And most teens who have had sex don’t do it very often.

Choosing to have sex for the first time is a big decision that’s very personal. People think about lots of different things: religious, spiritual, and moral beliefs; family and personal values; desire; love; and/or relationships. Whatever your reason is, it’s important to wait until you’re sure you’re ready to have sex.

Lots of teens who’ve had sex say they wish they had waited. If you’ve already started having sex and want to stop, that’s totally okay — just because you’ve had sex before doesn’t mean you have to do it again. People can be abstinent (not have sex) at any time, for any reason. And some people choose to never have sex — that’s totally okay, too.

Try not to worry too much about what other people do. When you lose your virginity isn’t as big a deal as making sure you and your partner are ready for sex. If you have sex just to fit in, it probably won’t be a very good experience. It’s better to wait to have sex until you feel totally ready — and are prepared for some of the possible consequences of sex (like pregnancy or STDs).

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Hymen Variants: Overview, Types and Treatment

Nationwide Children’s Hospital

Overview

Types

Treatment

What Are Hymen Variants?

Hymen is a thin piece of tissue located at the opening of the vagina. The hymen needs to be open to allow menstrual blood and normal secretions to exit the vagina. Hymens come in different shapes.

What Are the Different Types of Hymen Variants?

Imperforate Hymen

A condition in which the hymen fails to open up and therefore completely covers the opening to the vagina, blocking menstrual blood and secretions from flowing out. An imperforate hymen may be noted at birth, but more commonly is diagnosed during puberty. An adolescent girl with an imperforate hymen typically presents with no menstrual period and abdominal or pelvic pain. This is due to the vagina being filled with menstrual blood that cannot exit. The patient may also have urinary symptoms – such as urinary frequency, urinary urgency, or feelings of incomplete voiding.

Microperforate Hymen

A condition in which the hymen has a very small opening. Menstrual blood and vaginal secretions can flow out of the vagina, but the patient may have difficulty or inability to use tampons or have vaginal intercourse. In some cases, a teen with a microperforate hymen may not realize that she has a very small opening. If she is able to place a tampon into her vagina, she may not be able to remove it when it becomes filled with blood.

Cribiform Hymen

A condition in which the hymen has several very small openings. Menstrual blood and vaginal secretions can flow out of the vagina, but the patient will be unable to use tampons or have vaginal intercourse.

Septate Hymen

A septate hymen occurs when the hymen has a band of extra tissue in the middle that causes two small vaginal openings instead of one. Menstrual blood and vaginal secretions can flow out of the vagina, but the patient may have difficulty or inability to use tampons or have vaginal intercourse. In some cases, a teen with a septate hymen may not realize that she has extra tissue. If she is able to place a tampon into her vagina, she may not be able to remove it when it becomes filled with blood.

What Is the Treatment for Hymen Variants?

Treatment of a hymen variant (imperforate, microperforate, septate or cribiform hymens) is a minor outpatient procedure, called a hymenectomy – during which the gynecologist removes the excess tissue, leaving a vaginal opening that is the appropriate size. Once the extra tissue is removed, it does not grow back.

The gynecologist may perform the procedure in the office or operating room depending upon the amount of hymen tissue that needs to be removed and patient comfort. Patients do very well with this procedure and have little or no pain after hymenectomy.

You Might Also Be Interested In

Condition

Vaginal Anomalies

Vaginal anomalies are disorders that involve abnormally formed or absent vaginas. These include: vaginal agenesis, imperforate hymen, septate hymen, transverse vaginal septum and transverse vaginal septum. These occur in about 5% of females with an anorectal malformation/imperforate anus.

Virginity and a cup – LadyCup

I remember how I myself suffered in the summer, at the age of 12 – the heat, my girlfriends ran to swim in the river, but I can’t – my period. I already bought the first tampax in my life, but I can’t figure out where to insert it. I remember this feeling of helplessness very well. I will add only one comment to the text that you will read below. If the girl, as she intended, used LadyCup size S, which is very petite in size, it would be easier for her.

You girls can benefit from the experience of a peer. Original (English).

“Some time ago I became interested in menstrual cups. A week ago I was quite clear that I would try it. However, there was one problem. I’m a virgin and until a week ago nothing happened in my vagina at all. I didn’t even know how to find the entrance in her! How touching, isn’t it? However, I have already decided and if I decide something, I will definitely do it. I did a little research and decided that the best cup would be the LadyCup, since it is very small. But today my cycle began, and I still hadn’t bothered to order it, so I got in my car and drove to the nearest Whole Foods to buy a bowl of Diva. 0003

In any case, I am sure that the best way to learn how to do something in the best way is to do everything yourself and gradually: in baby steps. I play the clarinet and I know it’s impossible to just look at a difficult piece of music and play it perfectly the first time. You need to develop a certain amount of muscle memory in your fingers, starting slowly and gradually accelerating until this area is so easy that you will wonder why I once thought it was difficult. Using a bowl is the same. Since you’ve never inserted anything into your vagina before, it’s normal for you to feel uncomfortable at first.

So I’ve come up with a set of baby steps for getting to know the bowl, and I want to share them with you. These steps may seem small or insignificant, but hey, that’s why they’re called “baby steps” 🙂 If you want to take more than one step at a time, do it if you’re ready. But if you feel any discomfort, set aside to return to this step later. You will be able to do all the steps that you were able to do before, as the muscles will remember how, and then you will be ready to move on to the next step.

Before your cycle starts:

1. Find the entrance to your vagina. It sounds silly, but I honestly thought that he was taller than he actually was.

2. Relax and try to insert your finger inside. Very little. Just long enough to get used to having something inside your vagina.

3. Try to insert one finger as far inward as possible. If it hurts, then stop and try again after a while.

4. Once you’ve got all of the above, study your anatomy. Feel where your hymen is and all that.

5. Stretch your hymen a little. Press it lightly with your finger, but not so much as to feel pain. You can also do this with a few fingers, but I never got around to that.

When you started your cycle:

1. Learn your anatomy even better. When I have my period, my muscle tone is weaker and my hymen is more flexible.

2. It’s time to get the bowl. Decide which folding option you want to use. I like “7” because it’s the smallest and easier to hold.

3. Now separate your labia and place the tip of the rolled cup up. Move it down towards the vagina until you feel the entrance. I’ve found it’s not that easy to find unless you touch it with your hand, but with practice it does get easier.

4. Try pushing the bowl inward. Make sure you aim for your tailbone from the inside. The first time I did not take it into account, and it was painful. Push the bowl a little at a time. If you feel uncomfortable, stop and try again later.

5. Eventually you will be able to fit most of the bowl inside, but don’t put it all the way in yet. Practice entering most of it several times.

6. At this step, you should be ready to insert the cup completely. It’s a little hard to say for sure that the cup has opened. To help determine whether it is open or not, your finger will help – run it along the edges of the bowl. The first time I inserted it, there was no pain at all. In fact, I barely felt it inside at all.

7. Great, now that you have completed all the steps, you can finish and remove the bowl. And this is the hardest part. Make sure you are very relaxed. The first thing you want to do is to insert your finger and break the tightness (suction of the bowl) by pressing on the edge of the bowl. Then drag it down and rotate it out. Yes, I won’t lie, it hurts since my hymen was there. I’m not sure if I ripped it or not as I still can’t feel it there, but now it’s the least of my bother.

Whatever you do, don’t be nervous or panicky when you take it out. If the hymen is in the way, just remember that it’s temporary and it won’t keep the cup inside forever 🙂

UPDATE: More removal tips.

Well, it turns out that my cervix is ​​quite high even during my period. And when I tried to remove the cup after the first day of full use, I was extremely shocked. I could barely reach it and it was slippery as it started to leak. And of course it was natural for me to panic. But I managed to take it out! The first thing I had to do was squat down and push, really hard! It starts to move down when you do it, even after that I could hardly control myself! In any case, in the end, I was able to get it with my finger, press it against one wall and break the tightness and suction. Then, quite frankly, I grabbed the bowl and pulled it out while pushing.

It didn’t hurt, but I highly recommend doing it in the shower as there was blood all over the place, but luckily I only had to turn on the faucet to wash everything off.

—

Here are a few tips if your cup is leaking. At first, my cup did not leak, but as soon as I learned how to insert it, it began to leak. Although it only lasted half an hour, and then stopped. It so happened that I did not insert it deep enough. She herself rose as much as necessary and stopped leaking, but it is much better, at least for me, to immediately insert it higher. It also presses me if it is not positioned correctly. So if you have a leak – experiment with how and where you insert the bowl. You may even want to try other ways of folding the bowl, as this may help the bowl fit more correctly.

—–

In any case, I think the most important idea in using the bowl is not to rush. Make sure you are ready. It’s not acceptable for a guy to force something, if you’re not ready, also don’t force yourself.

Also remember that over time you will still be able to use the bowl! She will fit! The vagina expands just wonderful! I hope I was useful and did not tire you to death :)”

suitable for whom, indications and contraindications for surgery

Just a few decades ago, hymenoplasty (hymen restoration) was completely unthinkable.

The reasons why women decide to have such an operation are completely different. However, in gynecology in Krasnodar, the popularity of the operation does not decrease.

The hymen is the part of the vaginal mucosa that completely or only partially covers the entrance to the vagina. The skin often tears after the first intercourse.

Hymenoplasty is suitable for women who suffer from psychological problems after unwanted sexual intercourse, rape, sports or accidents with subsequent damage to the hymen. Which often lead to low self-esteem or reduced self-confidence.

Main indications for hymenoplasty

There are many factors that can serve as indications for hymenoplasty. These include:

• Rape.

• Careless use of a tampon.

• Injury to the hymen during sports.

• Absence of the hymen from birth.

• Cultural and religious factor.

Regardless of the cause, sooner or later the hymen can be restored if the remnants of the hymen tissue can be found. But permanent hymenoplasty is not possible for women who have had many sexual intercourses or have given birth to many children.

Main contraindications for hymenoplasty

Hymenoplasty is performed under local anesthesia and consists in suturing the remnants of the natural hymen, which is located on the walls of the vagina.

• Purpura.

• Menstruation.

• Candidiasis.

• Blood clotting disorders.