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I have aspergers: Asperger’s Syndrome Signs and Symptoms

Asperger’s Syndrome Signs and Symptoms

Children and adults with Asperger’s syndrome experience a wide variety of symptoms, and no two cases are exactly the same.

Some individuals will face minor issues that don’t interfere with their everyday lives, while others will struggle to function in academic, social, and workplace environments.

For many years, Asperger’s syndrome was considered a distinct diagnosis, but in 2013 the American Psychiatric Association reclassified Asperger’s under the broader umbrella diagnosis of autism spectrum disorders (ASD). However, many clinicians continue to reference Asperger’s syndrome as part of discussions with patients and families when looking at a potential ASD diagnosis. (1)

Knowing the symptoms of Asperger’s can help parents, and patients themselves, get an accurate diagnosis.

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Boyle, 47, didn’t realize she had Asperger’s syndrome, though the clues — trouble with eye contact, anxiety, and sudden and emotional withdrawal in uncomfortable situations — were everywhere. It made sense when Boyle’s doctor told her she had the disorder.

Boyle was anything but thrown by the diagnosis. “Asperger’s doesn’t define me,” she told The Guardian. “It’s a condition that I have to live with and work through, but I feel more relaxed about myself. People will have a greater understanding of who I am and why I do the things I do.”

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All my life it was difficult to communicate with people, but it turned out that I have Asperger’s syndrome

Anna has been working as a librarian for many years, lives in her small apartment with two sick cats – she caught one of them in the river. Anna loves animals and people, someone always lives in her house: either hippies or unrecognized street musicians, or poor students who have come to the big city to study.

Give me words!

– With age, I got a clear feeling that all people know something that I don’t know, but they can’t explain it to me because it’s like walking or breathing – how can you explain it? For example, it would be difficult to explain to a rational creature that has no legs, but only fins, how it is to walk, or to explain to the inhabitant of the sea how to breathe air . .. This is intuitively clear to everyone, but it seems incomprehensible to me. For most people it’s like breathing, but for me it’s like playing the piano.

How was it as a child? For example, I read in a book that D’Artagnan called out to some musketeer, and I don’t understand exactly how he called out to him, with what words. Or: “She thanked him for his help.” How?! Give me words! That is, the absence of words does not interfere with my reading, but in a live conversation it does. Or I read a dialogue from which I understand that if they tell me this, I will answer like this. But will they say exactly what is written in the book to my remark in life? Is not a fact. And I had to juggle a huge number of blanks! And it happened that I stupidly repeated what people already said or did in front of me.

I could, not really understanding which facial expression corresponds to which situation, just in case, copy my grandmother’s facial expression, but it turned out to be inappropriate. What caused the angry reaction of the same grandmother – there is nothing, for example, to smirk when everything is serious.

Or, in early childhood, when I heard my grandmother complaining about feeling unwell, without any second thought, I said: “Nothing hurts you!” They tried to explain to me that they don’t answer like this in these cases, and I realized that I had blurted out something wrong, but I didn’t understand why. I thought that if they tell me when I get a bruise, “nothing, it will pass!”, And I can do it, because I wanted to say that everything is not so bad, I wanted to cheer up my grandmother.

In the second grade I met a girl, we somehow mutually decided that we would be friends. That is, she says: “Let’s be friends!” And I began to think about how she imagines friendship, because I already began to understand that there is some difference between what I read in books and what happens in real life. And I feel that I can’t formulate it normally, but I have to ask . .. and I ask: “What do you need from me?” She: “What-oh-oh?!” Then I realized that I had said the wrong thing … but for a very long time I did not understand what exactly was “wrong”.

And so it was with the class teacher and teachers.

I had friends: I always found someone who communicated with me individually more or less normally, and hid behind him. At the university I met a young man – we got married, and a few years later we divorced. I remember that in my student period, when we moved from the building of one faculty to the building of another, out of fear I clutched at him with a stranglehold, probably even hurt him. This is because from the space I mastered, where I feel entitled to be, I know people and things and count on support, I had to move to an alien, unknown to me personally space, where I don’t know what to expect from others, and therefore it’s scary.

In every new place, in every new team, at first I am afraid that something will happen that I will not be able to cope with. I didn’t know how to talk to people, I didn’t know how they would react to my words. Perhaps, because of my peculiarities, someone had conflicts with me that I did not notice.

I can miss the moment to say hello, but say “Hello!” after two or three phrases already spoken in the dialogue, it is somehow strange.

Quite often I use mnemonic techniques related to memorization. Still, I have a university behind me: there, like it or not, you learn all sorts of mnemonic techniques. Another feature is that I quickly get tired of actions consisting of more than one step.

In the area of ​​relationships, I always need specific, single examples, samples: I focus on them. And if I need to quickly sketch out a memo, for example, when working with a literary text, then I can draw it … For example, during testing, when I was asked to remember a number of abstract concepts, I designated situations from my favorite books that illustrate those or other relationships. For example, for “friendship”, I had Maedhros and Fingon drawn in the episode where one takes the other off a cliff (talking about the characters of J. R. R. Tolkien’s book “The Silmarillion” – I. L.)

After my grandmother died, I moved into her apartment. Someone always lived with me: girlfriends, acquaintances of girlfriends, and it was good, a certain community was taking shape, and I felt that this suited me more than a family. And when I lived alone, I found that I was not able to go around the house.

Relatives do not know about my syndrome

One day I was sitting and chatting about my difficulties with a friend who has a degree in psychology. A friend, listening to me, suddenly said: “Maybe you have Asperger’s? Not only what you say, but also how you communicate, is similar to the manifestations of this syndrome. At that time I didn’t know what it was. But after the words of her friend, she thought about it, decided that she needed to go to the doctor.

Now I call my oddities – features, although I was brought up without considering these features. And both peers and adults communicated with me without taking into account these features.

I still have to force myself to communicate with people.

I had a friend (unfortunately, she died) with whom I could communicate without fear that she would misunderstand me. Because if she did not understand, or if she thought that I said something unpleasant, she simply asked again. What happiness! And if I didn’t understand her, I could also ask her again as many times as I wanted. This was the only person with whom I communicated without all internal restrictions, so without her I was very, very orphaned.

My relatives don’t know about my diagnosis. Mom knows about my trips to a psychotherapist, does not approve, but somehow puts up – like “whatever the child amuses herself with.” Somehow, she believes that there is no sense in this, but you just need not to dissolve, to control yourself.

Did I get better after seeing a doctor? I don’t see any changes in myself. But the atmosphere in society has a positive effect, and it has changed. Already less than this “I will not surrender to a psychiatrist for nothing” and the idea that all psychiatry is by definition punitive … What I am a little afraid of is still what they learn at work. And I’m always good with myself.

I am not Gagarin

It happens that, for example, I can cook borscht, pea soup, salad, and bake meat in one evening. And I can’t cook anything. Deadlines help with difficult situations. For example, before the guests arrive, you clean up so that the guests have an elementary place to sit.

Sometimes they try to help me: do something around the house, with repairs, etc., but it turns out that a person does it for himself, and not for me. Look, do you see the bottle? You don’t have to throw it away. This is a special bottle, which, being light – plastic, square, half a liter, can also withstand boiling water. I saved this cat thanks to this bottle: I took boiling water in the veterinary clinic, wrapped it in a diaper, and the cat warmed up on the road. After all, I picked up a cat in the river, she had hypothermia.

Because there are people with similar problems, it’s easier for me – I’m not Gagarin, I can’t be the first and without looking back make some discoveries, even personal ones.

“He did the impossible because he didn’t know it was impossible” – that’s not about me. You look to the right, to the left and you understand that people somehow solve similar problems. And you have hope that you can too. You sit in a swamp, you don’t know what to do, but you see: “Here is a man who has found a way, this way does not suit me, but maybe I will find my own.”

The psychologist who is doing CBT with me now, when I ask what we are doing, answers: “We are doing adaptation. You have become maladjusted. For example, you do not notice how you help people. So you said that you do not interfere in the studies of a student who was allowed to live with you. And you yourself tell how they helped him with the essay. Although I don’t really think it’s that much of a learning aid.

In childhood, people with Asperger’s Syndrome are often child prodigies

A psychiatrist, psychotherapist, candidate of medical sciences talks about the features of Asperger’s syndrome Ivan Martynikhin :

– Some time ago, the scientific community was of the opinion that Asperger’s syndrome is a separate disorder, different from autism. Later, nevertheless, the terms “childhood autism”, “Asperger’s syndrome” and “high-functioning autism” (which is practically a synonym for Asperger’s syndrome) were combined into one concept – “autism spectrum”. And now we’re talking about more severe and milder autism. Asperger’s Syndrome is a milder variant of autism.

“Light” is, of course, a comparative characteristic. The two main criteria for diagnosing autism are complex social communication and a tendency to repetitive behavior. This unites all variants of autism. But in a severe form, a person may not notice other people at all, so often such people do not even develop speech – they do not understand social signals.

In children with mild forms of autism such as Asperger’s syndrome, the lack of complex social communication is not yet evident. Therefore, Asperger’s syndrome is often diagnosed already in adults – after all, in childhood, many of them rather pleased their parents.

These children start talking early, show a good memory in their areas of interest – for example, some like languages ​​and learn several languages, some do well in mathematics, that is, they seem to be geeks.

And in middle and high school they have communication problems with the team, with teachers, in adult life – with the work team, in family life. A person with Asperger’s Syndrome can suffer greatly because they fail to build subtle partnerships. His subjective discomfort can be much greater than that of a non-verbal person with a severe form of autism, who, in principle, does not compare himself with other people.

It happens that people with Asperger’s syndrome adapt to the work community. Most often they are programmers, mathematicians, linguists. This may be a very high-profile specialist who enjoys authority, but in a situation where complex communication is needed, he has problems.

In IT companies, specialists are evaluated according to the criteria of hard skills and soft skills: the first is professional skills, the second is the ability to communicate in a team, work in a team, quickly understand requirements, and the like.

And it turns out that a person with Asperger’s syndrome has good hard skills and poor soft skills. Some adapt to special conditions, and some cannot adapt in any way, despite a good education.

Based on world statistics, in Russia, as in other countries, a sufficiently large number of people with Asperger’s syndrome should be diagnosed – according to the latest data, in the USA there are already more than 1 in 50 people. Rates in Europe and the US are now changing frequently as the threshold is lowered – more and more mild cases are being diagnosed.

And in Russia, according to 2019 data, only a few hundred people were diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome – out of a population of 140 million. I am collaborating with the Anton Is Here Foundation: we have already held four training courses for young psychiatrists. I hope that in connection with this, the diagnosis of Asperger’s syndrome will improve. But so far, even in St. Petersburg, there may be only a few dozen doctors who can expertly make this diagnosis.

The ability to understand other people is a fairly complex skill, its development requires a lot of time and effort. And doctors are more likely to work not with Asperger’s syndrome itself, but with complications arising from it – for example, with anxiety disorders, which occur in many people with autism due to some kind of social failure.

It is not easy to do something with Asperger’s syndrome itself, but it is possible, and first of all, the patient himself should deal with this, and his relatives should help him – place him in a social environment, explain something. Of course, it must be training. There are no such trainings in St. Petersburg, but there are several online self-help groups for people with Asperger’s syndrome, where they share with each other ways to adapt. But these are isolated cases, and very few people are involved in this.

As a rule, people have to learn on their own. I have several examples of how people with different behaviors have become much more competent in socialization. They went to schools of acting or public speaking, reading courses, and so gradually learned to express their emotions in a socially acceptable way, to understand other people, by the age of 30 or 40 learning what other people intuitively grasp at 14 years old – they immediately read the mood of the interlocutor, his emotions .

And people with Asperger’s syndrome can come to this, but much later and through rational understanding, through intellectual effort. I know young men who begin to build relationships with the opposite sex by reading books, including those on psychotherapy, trying to figure out how the mental world of other people works.

Drawings by Varvara Grankova

Asperger’s syndrome in adults: 12 signs0003

In some countries, this syndrome is no longer considered a separate diagnosis and is considered as a type of autism spectrum disorder. However, not all experts agree with this, and many people with this disorder see little in common with autism in their condition, since they do not have speech and cognitive impairments.

Be that as it may, this disorder seriously complicates a person’s daily existence and can create problems in his professional and personal life. Here are some signs that often distinguish people with Asperger’s Syndrome:

1. Unusual way of speaking. It may seem like you are talking to a computer: the interlocutor brings down a stream of facts at you without pausing and (almost) not listening to you. Sometimes people with this syndrome have an unusual timbre of voice.

2. Difficulties with non-verbal communication. You may notice that your interlocutor almost does not use gestures, and his facial expressions are not rich.

3. Lack of eye contact. It’s not that your interlocutor can’t make eye contact with you, it’s just that they don’t feel the need for eye contact. If you draw his attention to this, he may try not to look away and even go too far, looking at you too intently.

4. Problems with etiquette. Such a person may seem rude or ill-mannered, but in fact he simply lacks intuition telling how to behave correctly. For example, he may turn away and go about his business without listening to what you say to him, or invite you to dinner and not come, or open the door when you arrive, look at you and, without greeting, go into the house. The rules of good manners, which are accepted in society, are alien to him.

5. Obsessive focus on one topic (often unusual). He may collect things that others would not think of collecting, he may have an unusual hobby, he may show an obsessive interest in some person. And talk non-stop about the subject of your passion, not noticing how it tires your interlocutors. Sometimes he suddenly switches to another hobby. If he has lost interest in the person he adored, he will suddenly become cold with him.

6. Inability to understand the feelings of another person. They are often seen as cold, unfeeling, lacking in empathy. But it’s not that they’re incapable of empathy or unwilling to show kindness. They just have less emotional experiences than others. Often they cannot understand why other people are so upset or excited, and then they prefer to go away and think about it alone.

7. Poor communication skills. Sometimes they talk non-stop about their own, not noticing that others are offended or they are no longer interested in listening. And when they don’t like someone, they abruptly end the conversation. Such behavior from the outside seems absurd.

8. Inability to share feelings. Are you surprised when a well-known person at a meeting does not even ask how you are doing, and does not tell about his success himself? But it is unusual for people with Asperger’s syndrome to share feelings and impressions.

9. Black and white thinking. Having once come to an opinion or decision, they will stick to it, in spite of any arguments. It is difficult for them to accept that other people have a different point of view.

10. Lack of flexibility. Plans changed at the last minute? For a person with Asperger’s, this is a test fraught with psychological overload, he is not ready for impromptu. He can be upset by real trifles, seemingly not worthy of attention, or by something that is unusual for him.

11. Following routine. Structure and established rules are extremely important to him. In the event of a violation of the usual routine, they feel unsettled and begin to panic.

12. Hypersensitivity. They can be very sensitive to touch and try their best to avoid it, except for a partner. They will recoil if they are patted on the back and will not allow themselves to be hugged. They may also have other autistic traits, such as heightened sensitivity to sounds, lights, and even hard tags on the inside of clothing.