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I hiccup when i cough. Hiccups When Coughing: Unraveling the Connection Between Throat Clearing, Allergies, and Hiccups

Why do hiccups occur after clearing your throat. How are allergies related to increased hiccup susceptibility. What causes the relationship between coughing and hiccups. How can you prevent hiccups triggered by throat clearing.

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The Physiology of Hiccups: Understanding the Mechanism

Hiccups are involuntary contractions of the diaphragm, the muscle that separates the chest cavity from the abdomen. These contractions are followed by a sudden closure of the vocal cords, producing the characteristic “hic” sound. But what causes this peculiar bodily function?

The hiccup reflex arc involves several nerves, including the phrenic nerve, vagus nerve, and sympathetic chain. When stimulated, these nerves can trigger the diaphragm to contract, leading to hiccups. Various factors can activate this reflex arc, including eating too quickly, swallowing air, or even certain medical conditions.

The Role of the Phrenic Nerve in Hiccups

The phrenic nerve plays a crucial role in the hiccup mechanism. It originates in the neck and runs down to the diaphragm, controlling its movements. Irritation or stimulation of this nerve can lead to hiccups. This connection explains why activities involving the throat and chest area, such as coughing or clearing the throat, can sometimes trigger hiccups.

The Link Between Coughing and Hiccups: Exploring the Connection

Many people experience hiccups after coughing or clearing their throat. This phenomenon can be attributed to the close proximity of the structures involved in both actions. When you cough or clear your throat, you’re essentially creating a sudden change in pressure in your chest and throat area. This rapid pressure change can irritate the nerves involved in the hiccup reflex, potentially triggering a bout of hiccups.

Pressure Changes and Nerve Stimulation

The act of coughing or clearing your throat involves a rapid increase in intrathoracic pressure. This sudden pressure change can stimulate the phrenic nerve or the vagus nerve, both of which are involved in the hiccup reflex. As a result, you may experience hiccups shortly after coughing or throat clearing.

Allergies and Hiccups: Uncovering the Relationship

If you’ve noticed that you’re more prone to hiccups when your allergies are acting up, you’re not alone. There’s a potential connection between allergies and an increased susceptibility to hiccups. But how are these two seemingly unrelated conditions linked?

Postnasal Drip and Throat Irritation

Allergies often lead to postnasal drip, a condition where excess mucus runs down the back of the throat. This constant irritation can cause you to clear your throat more frequently, increasing the likelihood of triggering hiccups. Additionally, the inflammation and irritation in the throat caused by allergies may make the nerves in this area more sensitive, potentially lowering the threshold for hiccup initiation.

Medical Conditions Associated with Persistent Hiccups

While occasional hiccups are normal and usually harmless, persistent or recurrent hiccups can sometimes be a sign of an underlying medical condition. Understanding these potential causes can help in identifying when to seek medical attention.

  • Gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD)
  • Tumors or infections affecting the central nervous system
  • Certain medications
  • Metabolic disorders
  • Psychological factors, such as stress or excitement

In rare cases, persistent hiccups can be a symptom of more serious conditions, such as pulmonary embolism. A study published in the New England Journal of Medicine highlighted a case where persistent hiccups were the presenting symptom of a pulmonary embolism. While this is uncommon, it underscores the importance of paying attention to prolonged or unusual hiccup patterns.

Prevention and Management of Cough-Induced Hiccups

While it’s not always possible to prevent hiccups triggered by coughing or throat clearing, there are some strategies you can try to minimize their occurrence:

  1. Stay hydrated to reduce throat irritation
  2. Practice slow, controlled breathing techniques
  3. Avoid rapid eating or drinking, which can lead to swallowing air
  4. Manage allergies effectively to reduce postnasal drip and throat clearing
  5. Consider using a humidifier to keep the air moist and reduce throat irritation

Traditional Remedies for Hiccups

If you do experience hiccups, there are several traditional remedies you can try:

  • Holding your breath for a short period
  • Drinking water from the opposite side of the glass
  • Swallowing a teaspoon of granulated sugar
  • Gently pulling on your tongue
  • Breathing into a paper bag

While these remedies are not scientifically proven, many people find them helpful in stopping hiccups. It’s important to note that if hiccups persist for an extended period or occur frequently, it’s advisable to consult a healthcare professional.

The Impact of Hiccups on Daily Life and Well-being

For most people, hiccups are a minor inconvenience that resolves quickly. However, for some individuals, frequent or persistent hiccups can have a significant impact on their quality of life. Chronic hiccups can interfere with eating, sleeping, and social interactions, potentially leading to stress and anxiety.

Psychological Effects of Chronic Hiccups

Chronic hiccups can take a toll on mental health. The constant interruption and inability to control the hiccups can lead to frustration, embarrassment, and even depression in severe cases. Understanding the potential psychological impact is crucial in managing the overall well-being of individuals suffering from chronic hiccups.

Advancements in Hiccup Research and Treatment

While hiccups have been a part of human experience for millennia, scientific understanding of this phenomenon continues to evolve. Recent research has shed light on the complex neurological pathways involved in the hiccup reflex, opening up new possibilities for treatment and management.

Innovative Treatments for Chronic Hiccups

For cases of persistent hiccups that don’t respond to traditional remedies, researchers are exploring innovative treatments. These include:

  • Vagus nerve stimulation
  • Acupuncture
  • Specialized medications targeting specific neurotransmitters
  • Cognitive-behavioral therapy for psychogenic hiccups

While many of these treatments are still in the experimental stage, they offer hope for individuals suffering from chronic hiccups.

When to Seek Medical Attention for Hiccups

While most cases of hiccups are benign and self-limiting, there are instances where medical attention may be necessary. But when should you consider consulting a healthcare professional about your hiccups?

Red Flags for Hiccups

Consider seeking medical advice if you experience:

  • Hiccups lasting more than 48 hours
  • Hiccups interfering with eating, sleeping, or breathing
  • Hiccups accompanied by severe abdominal pain, fever, or shortness of breath
  • Frequent recurrence of hiccup episodes

These symptoms could indicate an underlying condition that requires medical evaluation and treatment.

The Role of Diet and Lifestyle in Hiccup Prevention

Your diet and lifestyle choices can play a significant role in the frequency and severity of hiccups. Understanding these factors can help you make informed decisions to reduce your risk of experiencing hiccups, especially if you’re prone to them after coughing or during allergy flare-ups.

Dietary Considerations for Hiccup Prevention

Certain foods and eating habits may increase your likelihood of experiencing hiccups. Consider the following dietary adjustments:

  • Avoid carbonated beverages, which can introduce excess air into your stomach
  • Eat slowly and chew food thoroughly to reduce air swallowing
  • Limit spicy or acidic foods that may irritate the diaphragm
  • Stay hydrated to keep your throat moisturized and reduce irritation
  • Be mindful of portion sizes, as overeating can lead to stomach distension and hiccups

Lifestyle Factors Affecting Hiccup Frequency

Beyond diet, several lifestyle factors can influence your susceptibility to hiccups:

  • Stress management: High stress levels can increase muscle tension, potentially affecting the diaphragm
  • Posture: Poor posture can put pressure on the diaphragm, potentially triggering hiccups
  • Exercise: Regular exercise can improve overall muscle tone and coordination, potentially reducing hiccup frequency
  • Sleep habits: Adequate sleep helps regulate bodily functions, potentially reducing hiccup occurrences

By making conscious choices in your diet and lifestyle, you may be able to reduce the frequency of hiccups, especially those triggered by coughing or allergies.

The Evolutionary Perspective on Hiccups

Have you ever wondered why humans experience hiccups at all? From an evolutionary standpoint, hiccups may seem like a useless and sometimes inconvenient bodily function. However, some researchers propose that hiccups may have served a purpose in our evolutionary past.

Theories on the Evolutionary Origin of Hiccups

One intriguing theory suggests that hiccups are a evolutionary remnant from our amphibian ancestors. The hiccup reflex bears a striking resemblance to the breathing pattern of tadpoles, which use both gills and lungs to breathe. This theory posits that the hiccup reflex may have helped our distant ancestors transition from breathing underwater to breathing air.

Another hypothesis proposes that hiccups in infants serve to remove air from the stomach, allowing for more efficient feeding. While these theories are speculative, they offer fascinating insights into the possible origins of this peculiar bodily function.

Cultural Perspectives and Folklore Surrounding Hiccups

Hiccups have been a part of human experience across cultures and throughout history. As a result, various cultural beliefs, superstitions, and folk remedies have developed around this common occurrence.

Global Hiccup Remedies and Beliefs

Different cultures have unique approaches to dealing with hiccups:

  • In Japan, some believe that hiccups occur when someone is talking about you
  • In Mexico, a common remedy involves biting on a red string
  • In Hungary, surprise is thought to cure hiccups, leading to the practice of unexpectedly scaring someone with hiccups
  • Ancient Egyptians believed hiccups were caused by evil spirits and used incantations to banish them

While many of these cultural remedies lack scientific backing, they highlight the universal nature of hiccups and the human desire to find solutions to this common ailment.

Future Directions in Hiccup Research and Treatment

As our understanding of the complex mechanisms behind hiccups continues to grow, so does the potential for new treatments and management strategies. What does the future hold for hiccup research and treatment?

Emerging Technologies in Hiccup Management

Several promising areas of research are emerging:

  • Neurostimulation devices: These could potentially modulate the nerves involved in the hiccup reflex
  • Targeted drug therapies: Medications that specifically address the neurochemical imbalances associated with chronic hiccups
  • AI-assisted diagnosis: Machine learning algorithms could help identify patterns and potential underlying causes of persistent hiccups
  • Personalized treatment plans: Tailored approaches based on individual factors such as genetics, lifestyle, and medical history

While many of these technologies are still in development, they offer hope for more effective management of hiccups in the future, especially for those who experience frequent or persistent episodes.

The Role of Interdisciplinary Research

Future advancements in hiccup research and treatment will likely require collaboration across multiple disciplines. Neuroscientists, gastroenterologists, pulmonologists, and even psychologists may all play a role in developing a more comprehensive understanding of hiccups and their various triggers and treatments.

By approaching hiccups from multiple angles, researchers hope to develop more effective strategies for prevention and management, potentially improving quality of life for those who frequently experience hiccups after coughing or during allergy flare-ups.

Conclusion: Understanding and Managing Hiccups in Daily Life

Hiccups, while often considered a minor nuisance, can significantly impact daily life when they occur frequently or persistently. Understanding the connection between hiccups, coughing, and allergies can help individuals better manage and potentially prevent these episodes.

While the exact mechanisms linking coughing, allergies, and hiccups are not fully understood, it’s clear that the complex interplay of nerves and muscles in the chest and throat area plays a crucial role. By being mindful of potential triggers, making appropriate lifestyle adjustments, and seeking medical advice when necessary, individuals can take proactive steps to manage their hiccups effectively.

As research in this field continues to advance, we can look forward to new insights and innovative treatments that may provide relief for those who frequently experience hiccups. Until then, a combination of traditional remedies, lifestyle modifications, and medical interventions when necessary can help most people effectively manage their hiccups and minimize their impact on daily life.

Remember, while occasional hiccups are usually harmless, persistent or severe hiccups may warrant medical attention. By staying informed and attentive to your body’s signals, you can ensure that hiccups remain nothing more than a minor, albeit sometimes amusing, bodily function rather than a significant health concern.

Persistent Hiccups as a Rare Presenting Symptom of Pulmonary Embolism

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Hiccups | NCH Healthcare System

Overview

Hiccups: What causes them

Spasms of your diaphragm that you can’t control cause hiccups. The diaphragm is the muscle that separates your chest from your stomach area and plays an important role in breathing. This spasm causes your vocal cords to close briefly, producing a “hic” sound.

Hiccups are repeated spasms or sudden movements of the diaphragm that you can’t control. The diaphragm is the muscle that separates your chest from your stomach area and plays an important role in breathing. A spasm in your diaphragm causes your vocal cords to suddenly close, producing a “hic” sound.

Eating a large meal, drinking alcoholic or carbonated beverages, or getting excited suddenly may cause hiccups. In some cases, hiccups may be a sign of an underlying medical issue. For most people, hiccups usually last only a few minutes. Rarely, hiccups may continue for months. When they last that long, they can result in weight loss and extreme tiredness.

Symptoms

Symptoms include uncontrolled spasms in your diaphragm and a “hic” sound. Sometimes you may feel a slight tightening sensation in your chest, stomach area or throat.

When to see a doctor

Make an appointment to see your health care provider if your hiccups last more than 48 hours or if they’re so severe that they cause issues with eating, sleeping or breathing.

Causes

The most common triggers for hiccups that last less than 48 hours include:

  • Drinking carbonated beverages.
  • Drinking too much alcohol.
  • Eating too much.
  • Being excited or under emotional stress.
  • Experiencing sudden temperature changes.
  • Swallowing air, such as when chewing gum or smoking.

Issues that may cause hiccups to last more than 48 hours include nerve damage or irritation, central nervous system disorders, metabolic issues, and certain drug and alcohol problems.

Nerve damage or irritation

A cause of long-term hiccups is damage to, or irritation of, the vagus nerves or phrenic nerves. These nerves supply the diaphragm muscle.

Factors that may damage or irritate these nerves include:

  • A hair or something else in your ear touching your eardrum.
  • A tumor, cyst or growth on the thyroid gland in your neck.
  • Stomach acid that backs up into your esophagus, the muscular tube that delivers food from your mouth to your stomach.
  • Sore throat or laryngitis.

Central nervous system disorders

A tumor or infection in your central nervous system or damage to your central nervous system due to an injury can disrupt your body’s normal control of the hiccup reflex.

Examples include:

  • Inflammation of the brain, which also is known as encephalitis.
  • Inflammation of the membranes that surround the brain and spinal cord, which also is known as meningitis.
  • Multiple sclerosis, which is the hardening of tissue in the brain or spinal cord that can result in paralysis or tremors.
  • Stroke.
  • Serious brain injury.
  • Tumors.

Metabolic issues

Long-term hiccups may result when your body’s metabolism doesn’t work properly.

Examples of metabolic issues include:

  • Diabetes.
  • Electrolyte imbalance, which is when your levels of potassium, sodium and other electrolytes are too high or too low.
  • Kidney disease.

Certain drugs and alcohol issues

Use of certain drugs or problems with alcohol may cause long-term hiccups.

Examples include:

  • Medicines that cause you to feel relaxed and sleepy, such as sedatives or other drugs used for anesthesia.
  • A steroid called dexamethasone, which is used to relieve inflammation in conditions such as arthritis, asthma and kidney problems.
  • Other steroids.
  • Alcohol use disorder.

Risk factors

Males are much more likely to develop long-term hiccups than females. Other factors that may increase your risk of hiccups include:

  • Mental or emotional issues. Anxiety, stress and excitement have been linked with some cases of hiccups.
  • Surgery. Some people develop hiccups after general anesthesia or procedures that involve organs in the stomach area.

Complications

Ongoing hiccups may interfere with eating, drinking, sleeping and speaking. Hiccups also can worsen pain.

Diagnosis

During the physical exam, your health care provider may perform a neurological exam to check your:

  • Balance and coordination.
  • Muscle strength and tone.
  • Reflexes.
  • Sight and sense of touch.

If your health care provider thinks that an underlying medical condition may be causing your hiccups, the provider may recommend one or more of the following tests.

Lab tests

Samples of your blood may be checked for signs of diabetes, infection or kidney disease.

Imaging tests

Imaging tests may be able to detect issues inside your body that may be affecting your diaphragm or the nerve that controls your diaphragm, called the phrenic nerve. Or these tests may show issues with a main nerve in your nervous system, called the vagus nerve. Imaging tests may include a chest X-ray, a CT or an MRI.

Endoscopic tests

These procedures use a thin, flexible tube called an endoscope that contains a tiny camera that is passed down your throat and into your esophagus, sometimes called your food pipe. The purpose is to check for issues in your esophagus or your windpipe.

Treatment

Most cases of hiccups go away on their own without medical treatment. If an underlying medical condition is causing your hiccups, treating that condition may stop the hiccups.

If your hiccups last longer than two days, medicines or certain procedures may be needed.

Medicines

Drugs used to treat long-term hiccups include baclofen, chlorpromazine and metoclopramide.

Procedures

If less invasive treatments aren’t effective, your health care provider may recommend an injection of an anesthetic to block your phrenic nerve to stop hiccups.

Another option is to surgically implant a battery-operated device to deliver mild electrical stimulation to your vagus nerve. This procedure is most commonly used to treat epilepsy, but it also has helped control long-term hiccups.

Lifestyle and home remedies

There’s no certain way to stop hiccups. But if your hiccups last longer than a few minutes, these home remedies may provide relief, although they are not proven:

  • Breathe into a paper bag.
  • Gargle with ice water.
  • Hold your breath.
  • Sip cold water.

If you have ongoing hiccups, lifestyle changes may help, such as:

  • Avoiding carbonated beverages and foods that give you gas.
  • Eating smaller meals.

Alternative medicine

When long-term hiccups don’t respond to other remedies, alternative treatments, such as hypnosis and acupuncture, may help.

Preparing for an appointment

You may initially talk with your family health care provider about your ongoing hiccups. Your health care provider may refer you to a specialist if you have long-term or severe hiccups.

What you can do

Consider writing a list that includes:

  • Detailed descriptions of your symptoms.
  • Information about health problems you’ve had.
  • Information about your parents’ or siblings’ health problems.
  • The medications and dietary supplements you take.
  • Questions you want to ask your health care provider.

What to expect from your health care provider

Your health care provider may ask:

  • When did your hiccups start?
  • How often do they happen?
  • What worsens or relieves them?
  • What medicines are you taking?
  • Have you had a sore throat or earache?
  • Do you have indigestion symptoms or bloating?
  • Have you had a sore throat or changes in your voice?
  • Have you had chest pain, a cough or difficulty breathing?
  • Do you have headaches or other symptoms that might be linked to your brain or nervous system?

Preparing for questions will help you make the most of your time with your health care provider.

Update Date: 03-02-2023

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Scenario of an ecological fairy tale Three from a pipe

Scenario of an ecological fairy tale “Three from a pipe

Heroes: Factory owner, multimillionaire: Harmful compounds: Sulfur dioxide, Nitrogen dioxide, Lead, Money, Healthy Christmas tree, Christmas tree without needles .

Requisites: a play house with a tunnel with a large inscription “Factory”, a pack of “dollars”, a multimedia presentation with pictures of nature0005

– I am Mr. Stepan Fedotov

Owner of factories and plants.

The chimneys smoke there all day long.

I’m not too lazy to count money!

Counts money, sniffs: “Oh, how good!” and raises his eyes. (dreams)

Money enters the hall to the music of “Lambada” and dances around the owner and takes him away.

Harmful substances come out of the “pipe” (tunnel from the playhouse) to the music from the cartoon “The Bremen Town Musicians”.

Sulfur dioxide:

I want to introduce myself, friends!

The ruler of the world is me!

I will flutter in the air –

You will always be ill!

Shortness of breath, runny nose, cough, weakness –

Just a joy to watch! (laughs)

Nitrogen dioxide:

And with my mighty breath

I can drive away the clouds in the sky!

I will hang instead of clouds!

I am formidable, angry, I am omnipotent!

Lead:

Plants are afraid of me!

How can they compete with me.

I blow – and suddenly it becomes

Forest without leaves,

Meadow without grass.

Dance “The Rulers of the World”

Sulfur dioxide: It’s time to take a walk in the forest.

Stealthily, sit down at the edges of the hall.

A fir-tree comes to the center of , flaunts in the mirror and sings:

A fir-tree was born in the forest, it grew in the forest.

In winter and summer she was slender and green.

A fir tree without needles comes out to meet her and greets her.

Healthy Christmas tree : Who are you?

Beast or bird:

Christmas tree without needles : Yes, it’s me! Your sister!

A club of smoke attacked me

And cut off all the needles!

They are dancing a slow waltz. And when they go forward to bow, harmful compounds get up and sneak after them. After the bow, the compounds laugh and blow loudly on the Christmas trees. The fir trees run away in horror. Connections go to the center.

Sulfur dioxide :

Are you sure? We are strong!

We are the future of the whole country!

Nitrogen dioxide:

While the government and authorities are silent –

We live to our heart’s content!

They laugh and disperse to the edge of the hall. It turns out the owner of factories :

I will never buy a filter!

After all, there is no harm to me from the smoke!

Let the evil monster almost kill the forest,

But I saved the money!!!

(counting money). Connections begin to blow on it with a howl.

Owner of factories , hunched over:

Oh! What’s happened? I am sneezing!

I cough and I hiccup.

How my back itches!

Greed paid in full!!

Coughing, leaves. It turns out Money:

Although the big filter costs money –

It will save all life!

Science is moving forward –

All gases are harmful prohibition!

Takes the “filter” and lifts it up. Connections run back into the pipe.

Denezhka, the owner of the plant, Christmas trees come out and read in turn:

Love nature!

Take care of the earth!

Lock up poisonous gases in the chimney!

Don’t save money for science!

All: And then you will boast of great health!

Publication address: https://www.prodlenka.org/metodicheskie-razrabotki/120547-scenarij-jekologicheskoj-skazki-troe-iz-truby

Read online The Legend of Ulenspiegel and Lamm Gudzak, Charles de Coster-Litres, page 10

LVIII

The leaves turned yellow on the trees, and sometimes an autumn wind blew. Sometimes Kathleen was quite sane for an hour or two. And Klaas said then that it was the spirit of God, in gracious mercy, visiting her. At such a time, by the magic of words and movements, she made Nele see hundreds of miles away what was happening in the squares, on the streets, and even in houses.

And on this day Kathleen was in a clear mind and together with Klass, Soetkin and Nele ate pancakes, abundantly poured with beer.

– Today His Majesty the Emperor Charles V abdicates [91] , said Claes. – Nele, dear, could you see what is happening now in Brussels?

“I’ll see if Kathleen wants to,” answered Nele.

Kathleen ordered her to sit on the bench and, with words and movements that acted like magic, forced Nele to quietly fall into a deep sleep.

“Come in,” Kathleen ordered her, “into the little house in the park where Emperor Charles the Fifth likes to stay.

“Here I am in a small green hall,” Nele said quietly and as if out of breath; – a man is sitting here, he is about fifty-four years old, gray-haired, bald, with a blond beard and a very protruding chin. The look of his gray eyes is full of cunning, cruelty and feigned good nature. This person is called “His Most Holy Majesty”. He has a cold and is coughing. Next to him stands another man, young, big-headed, ugly as a monkey, I saw him in Antwerp – this is King Philip. His Majesty scolds him for spending his last night away from home. “And all then,” he says, “in order to find a dirty slut in some miserable den.” He tells his son that his hair smells like a tavern, that his pleasures are unworthy of a king, that at his service are tender bodies, whose satin skin is washed in a fragrant bath, and the hands of noble ladies in love. And he likes some sow, which, probably, has not yet been washed off from the arms of drunken mercenaries who have just been abandoned by her. There is no girl, no husband’s wife, no widow who would refuse him: not one – not even the most beautiful and noble of those who illuminate their love joys with fragrant lamps, and not with smelly tallow candles.

The king answers his majesty that he will obey him in everything.

His Majesty coughs and takes a few sips of hot wine.

“Now,” he says to Philip, “you will see the estates general [92] – bishops, nobles and citizens: always silent William of Orange, conceited Egmont, gloomy Horn, brave as a lion, Brederode [93] and all knights of the Golden Fleece [94] , at the head of which I will put you. You will see hundreds of vain people who will allow themselves to cut off their nose to wear it on a golden chain on their chest – as a sign of the highest nobility.

Then he changes his tone and says plaintively to King Philip:

“You know, my son, I abdicate in your favor, I will give the world a stately spectacle and speak before the crowd, although I cough and hiccup, this is because I I have eaten too much all my life, my son. You must have an iron heart if you don’t shed a few tears after my speech.”

“I will cry, father,” replies King Philip.

Now his majesty speaks to his servant, named Dubois:

“Give me Madeira for a sugar cube, Dubois: I have hiccups. If only she hadn’t attacked me when I had to speak in front of people. This yesterday’s goose [95] must not pass. Shall I have a glass of Orleans? Or better not – it’s so tart. Or eat a sardine? No, it’s fat. Dubois, give me Bourgogne.”

Dubois serves wine to the king, then dresses him in purple velvet, throws a brocade robe around his shoulders, girds him with a sword, puts a scepter and an orb in his hands and puts a crown on his head.

His Majesty comes out of the pavilion, sits on a small mule, followed by King Philip and several courtiers. So they go to a large building – a palace; here in one of the rooms they meet a tall, slender man in rich clothes; This is Orange.

“How do you find me, cousin Wilhelm?” his majesty asks.

But he doesn’t answer.

His Majesty speaks half angrily, half jokingly:

“What are you, dumb forever, cousin? Even when it is necessary to tell the truth to the old relics? Should I reign or abdicate? Say Silent One.

“Your Most Holy Majesty,” says the tall one, “when winter comes, the mightiest oak shakes off its leaves.”

It strikes three o’clock.

“Come, Silent One, lean on your shoulder.”

And with him and with his retinue, his majesty enters the great hall and sits on a platform under a canopy, where everything around is covered with silk and purple carpets. Three thrones are arranged here: the middle one for his majesty; it is more luxuriously removed, and the imperial crown is hoisted over it. King Philip sits on another throne; the third is for a woman – for the queen [96] . To the left and to the right, on carpeted benches, gentlemen in red sit; all have a golden lamb hanging around their necks. Behind them are many gentlemen, all, apparently, princes and high persons. Opposite the throne, on uncovered benches, sit people in cloth robes. I hear in this crowd they say that they are so modestly dressed because all the expenses fall on them. When His Majesty appears, everyone rises. The emperor sits down and by a sign orders everyone to do the same.

An old man speaks slowly and for a long time [97] , then a lady, judging by her appearance – a queen, gives His Majesty a parchment scroll on which a lot of something is written, and the emperor, coughing, reads it in a dull, quiet voice and then says:

“I traveled a lot in Spain, in Italy, in the Netherlands, England and Africa, and all these wanderings were for the glory of the Lord God, for the power of our weapons, for the good of my peoples.

Then he speaks for a long time and announces that he is weak and tired and intends to give his son the crown of Spain, as well as all the duchies, counties and baronies belonging to it.

And he cries, and everyone cries with him.

King Philip rises from his seat, falls on his knees and says:

“Your Majesty, how can I dare to take this crown from your hands when you are still able to wear it!”

Then the emperor whispers in his son’s ear to make a favorable speech to the gentlemen sitting on the carpeted benches.

Philip, without getting up, addresses them and says in a sour tone:

“I know enough French to understand it, but not enough to speak it. So listen to what the Bishop of Arras, Cardinal Granvella, has to say instead of me.0181 [98] “.

“Bad speech, my son,” says his majesty.

Indeed, a murmur arises among the assembled, they see how arrogant and arrogant the young king is.

Then the queen speaks, offering praise to the sovereign, then the word passes to an elderly doctor, and when he has finished, his majesty thanks him with a wave of his hand. After all the formalities and rantings are over, his majesty declares his subjects free from the oath to him, signs the documents confirming this, then rises from the throne and gives way to his son. And everyone in the room is crying. And the emperor with his entourage retires to a house in the park.

Here, left alone, they lock themselves in the green hall, and the emperor, choking with laughter, turns to King Philip, who does not laugh:

“You see,” says His Majesty, laughing and hiccuping, “how little crush these people. What a flood of tears. And this fat Maas, who, at the end of his long speech, roared like a calf. Yes, and you seem touched, but not enough. Here is a real spectacle, which should be treated to the people. My son, we love our mistresses the more the more they cost us. It’s the same with nations. The more we fight them, the more they love us. In Germany I tolerated the Reformation, in the Netherlands I severely persecuted it. If the German sovereigns had remained Catholics, I myself would have converted to Lutheranism in order to confiscate their possessions, and they believe in my devotion to the Roman Catholic faith and regret that I leave them. Thanks to me, fifty thousand people died in the Netherlands, the most worthy men and the most beautiful women, all for heresy. Now I’m leaving the throne and they’re whimpering. Apart from the confiscations, I got more money out of there than India or Peru could give – and they are upset that they are losing me. I violated the Kazan Peace Treaty [99] , I strangled Ghent, I destroyed everything that could interfere with me; liberties, rights, privileges – all I have subjugated to the authority of my officials, and these dupes consider themselves free, because they are allowed to shoot arrows and wear their guild banners in processions. They feel the hand of the ruler: they cheer in the cage, sing and mourn me. My son, be with them as I am: merciful in words, severe in deeds. Lick until it’s time to bite. Swear unceasingly to observe all their liberties, rights and privileges. But when you see that they are dangerous, trample them. Do not touch them with a timid hand: then they are iron; but they are made of glass when you crush them with a heavy fist. Do not destroy the heretics because they have rejected the Catholic faith, but because they can undermine our position in the Netherlands. Those who attack the pope with his triple crown will easily deal with sovereigns who wear only one crown. Make, as I do, an insult to majesty out of freedom of conscience, entailing the confiscation of property, and you will receive inheritances all your life, like me. And when the day comes when you renounce or die, they will say: “Oh, the sovereign was good!” – and they will pay.

“I can’t hear anything further,” said Nele, “for his sacred majesty lies on the bed and sleeps, and King Philip, haughty and proud, looks at him without love.

After these words Kathleen woke her up.

And Claes thoughtfully looked into the fire that burned in the depths of the furnace.

LIX

Leaving the Landgrave of Hesse, Ulenspiegel passed through the square in front of the castle; he saw the angry faces of the gentlemen and ladies of the court, but this touched him little.

In the domain of the Duke of Lüneburg he met a company of Smaedelyke broeders, merry Flemings from Sluis, who every Saturday saved a little money to go to Germany once a year.

Singing, they made their way, sitting in an open cart, which a hefty Ambach horse jokingly dragged along the lanes and swamps of the Duchy of Lüneburg [100] . Some of them played violins, pipes, lutes, bagpipes, making a terrible noise. A fat man sometimes walked beside the cart, playing the rommel-pot, apparently in the hope of losing some fat.

They were running out of their last florin when they saw Ulenspiegel with a hard coin in his pocket. Dragging him into the tavern, they treated him there, which Ulenspiegel did not resist. But when he noticed that these guys were winking and chuckling, pouring into his mug, he guessed that they were plotting something against him, went out the door and began to eavesdrop on what they were saying there. And then he hears:

“This is the landgrave’s painter,” said the fat man, “he got over a thousand florins there for a painting. Let’s treat him well: we get doubly.

“Amen,” the others answered.

Ulenspiegel led his saddled donkey to the nearest house – a thousand paces; there he gave the girl two pataras to look after him, returned to the tavern to his company and silently sat down at the table. They poured everything in and paid for it. Ulenspiegel, jingling the earl’s gold in his pocket, said that he had just sold his donkey to the peasant for seventeen silver thalers.

So, having a hearty meal, they moved on to the sounds of pipes, rommel-pot bagpipes and taking along the way all the women who seemed suitable to them. They thus begat not a few children; Ulenspiegel’s random friend later also gave birth to a son, whom she named “Eilenspiegelchik” [101] , which in German means a mirror and an owl, because, as a German, she did not understand the nickname of her random roommate, or maybe the boy was named in the memory of the hour when he was created. He is the Eilenspiegel of whom it is falsely claimed that he was born in Knittingen, in Saxony.

A hefty horse raced their cart along the road towards villages and taverns. At one of them with a sign “In den Ketele” – “Korchma Kotel” – they stopped: it smelled very tasty from there.

Approaching the owner, the fat man pointed his finger at Ulenspiegel and said:

– This is the count’s painter: he pays for everything.

The innkeeper looked at Ulenspiegel and was satisfied with this inspection. Hearing the tinkling of florins and thalers, he filled the table with food and drink. Ulenspiegel missed nothing. And all the coins rang in his pocket. In addition, he patted his hat, saying that the greatest treasure was stored there. So the feast lasted two days and a night, until at last the company turned to Ulenspiegel:

– It’s time to pay and move on.

– Does the rat, sitting in the cheese, think to leave? replied Ulenspiegel.

– No.

– And when a person eats and drinks well, does he draw him to street dust and water from a puddle full of leeches?

– No.

– Well, we will sit here while my florins and thalers serve as a funnel through which a joyful drink pours into our throats.

And he ordered the innkeeper to serve more wine and sausages.

“I am crying, for now I am a Landgrave,” said Ulenspiegel as they ate, “but when my pockets are empty, what will you do, friends? Take my hat, in which everywhere, both in the crown and in the fields, gold coins are sewn up.

“Let me touch it,” they shouted.

And, choking with pleasure, they groped for coins the size of a chervonets with their fingers. But one felt so insistently that Ulenspiegel took away his hat with the words:

– Wait, fiery milker, it’s not time for milking yet.

“Give me half of your hat,” he asked.

– No, otherwise you will have a stupid head: there is light in one half, darkness in the other.

And, handing the innkeeper a hat, he said:

– Keep it with you while it’s hot. I will go out into the yard.

The innkeeper took his hat, and Ulenspiegel, finding himself in the street, ran over to where the donkey was, jumped on him and rushed off at a good trot to Embden.

Seeing that he was not returning, his drinking companions raised a cry:

– He ran away! Who will pay?

The innkeeper was frightened and cut the hat left to him with a knife. But between the felt and the lining, copper coins were sewn up instead of chervonets.

Then all his fury turned on Ulenspiegel’s comrades, and he shouted to them:

– Fraudsters, rogues, take off your dress, otherwise I won’t let you out – everything except your shirt!

So they paid with their clothes and rode in the same shirts through the mountains and valleys: they still did not want to part with the horse and cart.

And the travelers, meeting them in such a miserable state, gave them bread, beer, and sometimes meat, for they said that robbers had robbed them.

They had only one pair of pants left for the whole company.

So they returned to Sluys in their shirts, but in spite of this they danced in their cart and played the rommel-pot.

LX

And Ulenspiegel at this time was dangling on the back of Jef through the lowlands and marshes of the Duke of Lüneburg. The Flemings call this duke Water Signorke (Water Master) – it is very damp in his country.

Jeph obeyed Ulenspiegel like a dog. He drank beer, danced to the music better than the Hungarian buffoon, pretended to be dead and stretched out on his back at the slightest sign of the owner.

Ulenspiegel knew that the Duke of Lüneburg was angry and furious against him for having so cruelly ridiculed him in Darmstadt in the presence of the Landgrave of Hesse; the gallows threatened Ulenspiegel for staying in his possessions.

And suddenly he sees that the duke of his own person is approaching him. He knew that the duke was a cruel rapist, and he was pretty scared.

In fear, he spoke to the donkey:

– You see, Jeph, the noble Duke of Lüneburg is approaching there. I feel the rope rubbing hard on my neck. I hope not the executioner will scratch my neck: scratching is one thing, but hanging is another. Think, Jef, you and I are like brothers: we both endure hunger and wear long ears. Think what a good friend you would lose if you lost me.

And Ulenspiegel wiped his eyes, and Ief roared.

– We live together, sharing grief and joy as we have to – remember, Jef, – continued Ulenspiegel. The donkey continued to roar because he was hungry. “And you will never forget your master, is it not true, for nothing strengthens friendship so much as common sorrows and common joys. Yef, lie down on your back.

The obedient donkey obeyed, and the duke saw four donkey hooves sticking up. Ulenspiegel was already sitting on his stomach.

– What are you doing here? shouted the duke, approaching. “Don’t you know that in my last order, under pain of the gallows, I forbade your dirty feet to set foot on my land.

“Have mercy, sir,” answered Ulenspiegel, “have pity on me!

And pointing to the donkey, he said:

– You know that, by right and law, whoever lives between his four pillars is free [102] .

“Get out of my domain,” the Duke replied, “or you will be hanged.”

– O noble lord, how swiftly I would fly out of this land if I were inspired by one or two golden ones.

“You scoundrel,” replied the duke, “not only did you disobey me: do you dare to ask me for money as well?

– What should I do, your grace, – since I cannot take it away, I have to ask.

The duke threw him a florin, and Ulenspiegel addressed the donkey:

– Arise, Jeph, and greet the lord duke.

The donkey jumped up and roared. Then both disappeared.

LXI

Soetkin and Nele sat at the window of the hut and looked out into the street.

“Well, my dear,” asked Soetkin, “is my son Ulenspiegel coming?”

“No,” Nele answered, “we won’t see that wretched tramp again.

“Don’t be angry with him, Nele,” said Soetkin, “but have pity on him: he’s wandering somewhere without shelter, poor boy.

– Probably sheltered somewhere in a richer house than his own, with some pretty lady.

“I would be happy for him,” said Soetkin, “perhaps he is sitting and eating fried thrushes.

– Feed him a glutton with stones, then he would return home! Nele screamed.

Soetkin burst out laughing:

– Why such rage, my child?

Klaas, thoughtfully tying firewood, called out from the corner:

– Don’t you see that she is head over heels in love with him?

– Oh, nasty sly girl! Soetkin screamed. – Didn’t make a sound! Tell me girl, is it true that you like him?

“It’s nothing,” answered Nele.

– You will get a good husband, – Claes remarked, – with a wide mouth, an empty belly and a long tongue; a master of florin to make pennies; I have not earned a penny in my life by honest work. Always roaming the roads like a tramp.

But Nele suddenly flushed and angrily objected:

– Why didn’t you make something better out of him?

“You see, he brought the girl to tears,” Soetkin said, shut up, hubby.

LXII

Having reached Nuremberg [103] , Ulenspiegel presented himself here as a great physician, a healer of all infirmities, an illustrious stomach cleanser, a famous tamer of fever, a well-known liberator from the plague and an unsurpassed conqueror of scabies.

There were so many sick people in the hospital that they didn’t know what to do with them. Hearing about the arrival of Ulenspiegel, the caretaker of the hospital ran to him to find out if it was true what they say about him, that he cures all diseases.

“All but the very last,” answered Ulenspiegel. “But promise me two hundred florins for the cure of all other diseases, and I will not charge you a penny until all your patients declare that they are perfectly healthy and leave the hospital.

The next day, with an important, learned look and a confident look, he came to the hospital. Entering the wards and going around the sick, he leaned over to each and spoke in his ear:

– Swear you won’t tell anyone what you hear from me. Why are you sick?

The patient answered him and swore not to betray him.

“The point is this,” said Ulenspiegel, “I must burn one of you, make a miraculous medicine from his ashes and give to everyone else. Those who cannot leave the hospital on their own will be burned. Tomorrow I will come with the caretaker, I will stand on the street in front of the hospital and shout to all of you: “Who is not sick, take your belongings and go outside!”

The next morning Ulenspiegel did so.

All the sick – lame, rheumatic, consumptive, feverish – rushed out into the street at once, even those who had not left their beds for ten years.

The caretaker asked them if it was true that they were healthy and could run.

– Yes, yes! they shouted, in the certainty that someone had remained and that they were already burning him in the yard.

“Pay,” said Ulenspiegel, “here they are all in the street and declare themselves healthy.

And having received two hundred florins, he hurried out.

But the next day, the sick, even worse, began to return to the hospital, except for one who recovered from the clean air. This one got drunk and ran drunk through the streets shouting: “Long live the great doctor Ulenspiegel!”

91. “Today, His Majesty the Emperor Charles the Fifth abdicates” – October 25, 1555. On this day, in the face of the States General, 28-year-old Philip assumed power over the Netherlands, and somewhat later over Spain and its possessions.

92. The Estates General – a Diet of Estates common to all seventeen Dutch provinces, consisting of representatives of the provincial diets (states).

93. William of Orange (1533–1584) – son of the Count of Nassau. From his father he inherited vast lands in the Netherlands, from his uncle – the Principality of Orange, in the south of France. He became the richest Dutch nobleman, with an annual income of 150-200 thousand florins, while the richest after him, Egmont, had an income of no more than one third of this amount. Officially, he was governor (stadtholder) of three provinces (Holland, Zeeland and Utrecht) and a member of the State Council of the Netherlands. Before the invasion of Alba, he retired to the city of Dillenburg, from where he soon conquered Friesland. Having not achieved success on land, he organized a fleet together with the “sea geese”, which became a formidable force (1572). Later, he rallied into the so-called. Union of Utrecht, seven provinces that broke away from Spain, and this act laid the foundation for the republic of the united provinces (1579).
Count Lamoral, Egmont (1522-1568) – belonged to the ancient aristocracy of the Netherlands, where he had the richest possessions. In 1557, he played a prominent role in the victory of the Spanish-Flemish troops at Saint-Quentin, and the following year he defeated the French at Gravelingen, determining with these two victories the outcome of this war favorable for Philip II (1556-1558). This did not prevent Philip II from executing Egmont in 1568, although Egmont emphasized his loyalty to the king in every possible way, both with his cruel reprisals against the Reformers and with a special oath – about “unlimited obedience” to Philip II (1567), which William of Orange and Brederode refused to give .
Horn (Philippe Montmarency-Nivell Count Horn, 1518-1568) – a major Dutch feudal lord, governor of two provinces and admiral of Flanders. He was a friend of Egmont and his colleague in the battles of Saint-Quentin and Gravelingen. Horn shared the fate of Egmont.
Brederode, Heinrich (1531-1568) – a prominent Dutch aristocrat who took part in the events that preceded the Dutch revolution. Before Alba’s arrival in the Netherlands, he fortified his castle of Vivien, unsuccessfully defended it, and, fleeing, died shortly thereafter in Germany.

94. The Golden Fleece is a knightly order of the highest Dutch nobility, to which no more than 52 people could belong since the time of Emperor Charles V. Established in 1430 by Philip the Good, Duke of Burgundy. The badge of the order consisted of a golden chain with a figure of a lamb, reminiscent of the humility befitting the knights of the order, and that wool is the national wealth of the Netherlands.

95. “…this yesterday’s goose…” According to historians, Charles V was notable for morbid voracity and intemperance to drinks that destroyed his mighty health. Philip II had a fondness for sweets, emphasized by Coster.

96. “…the third… for the queen.” We are talking about Mary of Austria, sister of Charles V, widow of the King of Hungary and Bohemia, Louis II. She was the ruler of the Netherlands under Charles V, from 1531 to 1555, that is, until his abdication.

97. “An old man speaks slowly and for a long time” – Philippe de Brussels, member of the Privy Council of the Netherlands.

98. Granvella (1517-1586) – the son of the minister of Charles V, the Burgundian bourgeois Perrenault, and himself a minister and the closest adviser to the emperor, who managed to maintain his influence under Philip II. He became Bishop of Arras in 1540. Philip II, leaving the Netherlands in 1559, left him under the ruler Margarita of Parma and made (1561) the head of the Dutch church (as the archbishop of Mecheln). In 1561, the pope elevated him to the cardinals. He was a confidant of Philip II (who controlled his sister ruler through him), the conductor of the Spanish autocratic policy aimed at suppressing the national liberation movement of the Netherlands, and the leader of the religious and political terror of the Inquisition. He spoke contemptuously of the people, saying: “The evil animal called the people,” and the people called him “Red Dog” – for the color of the cardinal’s cap and for the streams of blood that Granvella shed. In the spring of 1564, Philip II succumbed to popular indignation and removed Granvella from the Netherlands.