Projecting onto someone. 7 Signs of Psychological Projection: Understanding and Dealing with Undesirable Emotions
What are the key indicators of psychological projection. How does projection manifest in relationships. Why do people engage in psychological projection. Can projection be both positive and negative. How can you identify if someone is projecting onto you. What causes individuals to project their emotions onto others. How can you effectively deal with someone who is projecting.
Understanding Psychological Projection: A Defense Mechanism
Psychological projection is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when individuals attribute their own thoughts, feelings, or traits to others. This defense mechanism allows people to cope with undesirable emotions by displacing them onto someone else. But what exactly drives this behavior, and how can we recognize it in ourselves and others?
Projection can be likened to a movie projector casting images onto a blank screen. In this analogy, the projector represents the individual’s mind, while the screen symbolizes other people. Just as the screen remains blank without the projected image, the target of projection may not possess the attributed qualities.
Types of Psychological Projection
Projection can manifest in two distinct forms:
- Positive projection: Attributing one’s positive traits to others
- Negative projection: Assigning one’s negative qualities to others
While positive projection may seem harmless or even flattering, it’s the negative projection that often leads to more significant interpersonal issues and emotional distress.
The Psychology Behind Projection: Why Do People Project?
What drives individuals to engage in psychological projection? At its core, projection serves as a protective mechanism for the ego. Humans, as social beings, have an innate desire to maintain a positive self-image both internally and in the eyes of others. By projecting undesirable traits onto others, individuals can temporarily alleviate the discomfort associated with acknowledging their own flaws.
Projection can occur both consciously and unconsciously. When done consciously, it may border on manipulation, akin to gaslighting. Unconscious projection, however, often stems from deeper psychological issues, such as past traumas or unresolved conflicts.
The Role of Trauma in Projection
How does past trauma contribute to projection? Consider a scenario where an individual experienced childhood abuse. This traumatic experience may lead to trust issues in adulthood. Instead of acknowledging their own struggle with trust, they might project this difficulty onto others, perceiving everyone as untrustworthy. This projection serves as a shield, protecting the individual from confronting their own vulnerability and shame.
7 Tell-Tale Signs Someone is Projecting Onto You
Recognizing when someone is projecting their emotions or traits onto you can be challenging. However, there are several key indicators to watch for:
- Disproportionate reactions
- Unjust blame
- Distorted perception of reality
- Self-victimization
- Inability to accept criticism
- Frequent accusations
- Lack of empathy
1. Disproportionate Reactions
When someone’s emotional response seems excessively intense for the situation at hand, it may indicate projection. Their outburst is often more about their internal struggle than your actions. For instance, if a colleague explodes with anger over a minor mistake, they might be projecting their own insecurities about job performance.
2. Unjust Blame
Does the person consistently blame you for issues that aren’t your fault? This behavior often stems from their inability to accept responsibility for their own actions or shortcomings. By shifting blame onto you, they avoid confronting their own role in the situation.
3. Distorted Perception of Reality
Individuals engaging in projection may create a narrative that doesn’t align with objective reality. They might insist on a version of events that paints you as the villain, regardless of evidence to the contrary. This distortion serves to reinforce their projection and protect their ego.
4. Self-Victimization
Projection often goes hand-in-hand with playing the victim. The person may exaggerate how your (projected) behavior affects them, seeking sympathy and validation from others. This tactic not only reinforces their projection but also attempts to manipulate your emotions.
5. Inability to Accept Criticism
When faced with constructive feedback, do they immediately become defensive or turn the criticism back on you? This reaction may indicate that they’re projecting their own insecurities or fears of inadequacy onto you.
6. Frequent Accusations
If someone constantly accuses you of behaviors or traits that don’t align with your character, they might be projecting. These accusations often reflect their own hidden fears or unacknowledged behaviors.
7. Lack of Empathy
Individuals caught in the cycle of projection may struggle to empathize with others’ perspectives. They’re so focused on maintaining their projected reality that they fail to consider how their actions impact those around them.
The Impact of Projection on Relationships
How does psychological projection affect interpersonal dynamics? The consequences of unchecked projection can be far-reaching, potentially damaging both personal and professional relationships. When one person consistently projects onto another, it creates an environment of mistrust, misunderstanding, and emotional turmoil.
In romantic relationships, projection can lead to:
- Communication breakdowns
- Emotional distance
- Unfair expectations
- Erosion of trust
In professional settings, projection may result in:
- Team conflicts
- Decreased productivity
- Poor leadership
- Toxic work culture
The Cycle of Projection in Relationships
Projection often creates a self-fulfilling prophecy. For example, if a partner projects their own insecurities about fidelity onto their significant other, they may become overly suspicious and controlling. This behavior can strain the relationship, potentially pushing their partner away and inadvertently creating the very situation they feared.
Dealing with Projection: Strategies for Coping and Communication
How can you effectively handle situations where someone is projecting onto you? While you can’t control another person’s behavior, you can develop strategies to protect your emotional well-being and maintain healthy boundaries.
1. Practice Self-Awareness
Before addressing someone else’s projection, it’s crucial to examine your own behaviors and emotions. Are you certain that you’re not the one projecting? Self-reflection can help you approach the situation with clarity and empathy.
2. Set Clear Boundaries
Establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries is essential when dealing with projection. Clearly communicate what behavior is acceptable and what isn’t. Be firm but respectful in enforcing these boundaries.
3. Use “I” Statements
When discussing the issue with the person projecting, frame your responses using “I” statements. For example, “I feel hurt when you accuse me of being untrustworthy” instead of “You always blame me for everything.” This approach reduces defensiveness and opens the door for more productive dialogue.
4. Seek Professional Help
If projection is severely impacting your relationship or mental health, consider seeking the guidance of a therapist or counselor. They can provide strategies for dealing with projection and help you navigate complex emotional situations.
The Role of Empathy in Addressing Projection
While it’s important to protect yourself from the negative effects of projection, approaching the situation with empathy can lead to more positive outcomes. Understanding that projection often stems from deep-seated insecurities or past traumas can help you respond with compassion.
How can you show empathy without enabling harmful behavior?
- Acknowledge the person’s feelings without agreeing with their projected reality
- Encourage open communication about underlying issues
- Offer support while maintaining your boundaries
- Suggest professional help if the projection seems rooted in deeper psychological issues
The Power of Validation
Validation doesn’t mean agreeing with someone’s projected reality. Instead, it involves acknowledging their emotions without judgment. For example, you might say, “I can see that you’re feeling really upset right now. Can we talk about what’s really bothering you?”
Overcoming Projection: A Path to Personal Growth
While dealing with someone else’s projection can be challenging, it’s equally important to recognize and address our own tendencies to project. How can we work towards overcoming projection in ourselves?
1. Cultivate Self-Awareness
Regular self-reflection and mindfulness practices can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. This awareness is the first step in recognizing when you might be projecting onto others.
2. Challenge Your Assumptions
When you find yourself making quick judgments about others, pause and question these assumptions. Are you basing your perceptions on objective reality or projecting your own fears and insecurities?
3. Practice Radical Acceptance
Learning to accept your flaws and imperfections can reduce the need for projection. Embrace the idea that everyone, including yourself, has both positive and negative traits.
4. Seek Feedback
Ask trusted friends or family members for honest feedback about your behavior. Sometimes, others can see our blind spots more clearly than we can.
5. Consider Therapy
If you find yourself consistently struggling with projection, working with a therapist can provide valuable insights and strategies for personal growth.
The Intersection of Projection and Mental Health
How does psychological projection relate to broader mental health concerns? While projection is a common defense mechanism, excessive or chronic projection may be indicative of underlying mental health issues.
Projection can be associated with:
- Anxiety disorders
- Depression
- Personality disorders, particularly narcissistic personality disorder
- Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
- Substance abuse disorders
Understanding the connection between projection and mental health can provide valuable context for both individuals experiencing projection and those on the receiving end. It underscores the importance of approaching projection with empathy and, when necessary, seeking professional help.
The Role of Therapy in Addressing Projection
Therapeutic interventions can be highly effective in helping individuals recognize and overcome projection. Some approaches that may be beneficial include:
- Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT)
- Psychodynamic therapy
- Mindfulness-based therapies
- Group therapy
These therapeutic modalities can help individuals develop greater self-awareness, process unresolved traumas, and learn healthier coping mechanisms.
Projection in Different Contexts: Beyond Personal Relationships
While we often discuss projection in the context of personal relationships, it’s important to recognize that this psychological phenomenon can manifest in various settings. How does projection play out in different areas of life?
Projection in the Workplace
In professional environments, projection can lead to:
- Micromanagement stemming from a manager’s insecurities
- Unfair performance evaluations based on projected traits
- Team conflicts arising from projected fears or anxieties
- Resistance to change driven by projected fears of inadequacy
Projection in Politics and Society
On a broader scale, projection can influence:
- Political discourse and polarization
- Stereotyping and discrimination
- Media narratives and public opinion
- Social movements and ideological conflicts
Understanding how projection operates in these diverse contexts can help individuals and organizations develop more effective strategies for communication, conflict resolution, and social progress.
The Role of Education in Mitigating Projection
How can we, as a society, work towards reducing the negative impacts of projection? Education plays a crucial role in this endeavor. By incorporating psychological literacy into educational curricula, we can:
- Increase awareness of projection and other defense mechanisms
- Promote emotional intelligence and self-reflection
- Teach effective communication and conflict resolution skills
- Foster empathy and understanding across diverse groups
By equipping individuals with the tools to recognize and address projection, we can create more harmonious relationships, workplaces, and communities.
7 Signs someone is projecting onto you
Projection in psychology means projecting your own mental states and traits onto others- traits that they don’t possess. Just as a movie projector projects moving images from a reel onto a screen, people project what’s going in their minds (reel) onto others (screen).
The screen itself is blank.
Projection is of two types:
A) Positive projection
When we attribute our positive traits to others, it’s a positive projection. When we positively project onto others, we attribute our good qualities to them that they actually lack.
An example of positive projection would be idealizing your romantic partner and believing they possess the good traits that you have, but they don’t.
B) Negative projection
When we talk about projection, we’re usually referring to negative projection. This type of projection is more common and can have drastic consequences.
Negative projection is when you attribute your negative qualities to others. For instance, denying a lack of responsibility in yourself while calling others irresponsible.
More examples of projection
To further clarify the concept of projection, let’s take a look at some more examples:
The cheating husband
If a husband cheats on his wife, he may accuse her of cheating. In this case, he’s projecting his behavior (being a cheater) onto his wife (who’s not a cheater).
The jealous friend
If your best friend is jealous of your new relationship, she may accuse your boyfriend of being jealous of your friendship with her.
The insecure mother
If you’re about to get married and are spending more time with your fiancée, your mother might feel insecure and exert greater control over you. Meanwhile, she may accuse your fiancée of being insecure and controlling.
What causes someone to project?
Being social species, humans need to look good to themselves and others. They highlight their positive traits and hide negative ones.
Projection is a means to hide your negative traits. When you project your negative traits onto others, the spotlight (and blame) shifts from you to them. They’re the villain while you’re a hero.
Projection is a denial of one’s dark side. It’s a defense mechanism of the ego. Admitting your flaws and negative traits hurts the ego.
Projection can be conscious or unconscious. Conscious projection is manipulation and is not very different from gaslighting.
Unconscious projection usually stems from past trauma.
For instance, if your father abused you as a child, you may experience problems with your social life when you grow up. You may find it hard to trust people.
Abuse creates shame in you, and you come to believe that something is wrong with you. As you grow up and your ego develops, you may find it harder and harder to admit your ‘flaw’. So, you project that ‘flaw’ onto others:
“I hate people. I don’t trust them. They’re flawed.”
Of course, there’s some truth to it. Nobody’s perfect. That’s a fact. But you use this fact not just to state a fact but also to stroke your ego and put a lid on your shame.
Signs someone is projecting
If you suspect someone you know is projecting, look for the following signs:
1. Over-reaction
If their anger and reaction are disproportionate to the situation, they’re likely projecting onto you. It may seem like they’re attacking you, but they’re really only fighting with themselves.
They’re embroiled in their inner conflicts, desperately trying to hide their dark side.
When they yell at you and say:
“WHY ARE YOU BEING SO MEAN?”
What they’re really saying is:
“I don’t want to accept that I’m mean.”
If their overreaction is recurring and follows the same pattern, you can almost be sure they’re projecting.
2. Blaming you unjustly
If you dare remove the lid and peek into the dark pit of their hidden negative qualities, you’re sure to face a backlash. They’ll grab you by the collar, pull you away, and slam the lid close.
When someone is projecting onto you, this is precisely what happens when they’re quick to blame you. They’re more interested in covering their lid than gathering facts.
They don’t stop to think that blaming you for the things that you didn’t do or the traits that you don’t have only makes things worse.
3. Living in a distorted reality
When someone is projecting onto you, their perception of reality gets distorted. They create their own fantasy world where you’re the guilty party. They throw their unjust accusations at you, and nothing seems to change their mind.
It’s hard convincing them to change their minds because they’re emotion-driven. They cannot be objective.
4. Playing the victim
Self-victimization is common in those who’re projecting. Often, it’s not enough to unjustly accuse you. They also want you to feel guilty for a trait you don’t have. So, they go on and on about what you’re (not) doing and how it affects them.
5. Ruining your mental health
If your mental health is never good when you’re with this person, chances are they’re projecting onto you. When someone projects onto you, your mental health can suffer for days.
If someone accuses you of doing something you did do, you can fight back and justify your actions or admit your mistake and apologize. You know what happened happened. The issue gets resolved quickly. You suffer mentally for some time and then bounce back.
But when they’re projecting onto you, the issue (non-issue) lingers. It lingers because you’ve been accused of something you didn’t do. You need time to process what’s going on. Your reality has been distorted.
You can’t focus on other life areas. Because to focus on something, you need a ‘self’, and your ‘self’ just got turned inside out.
Of course, it’s going to take longer to recover from that.
6. Changing you
When your ‘self’ gets turned inside out, it’s up to you to turn it outside in. It’s up to you to stick to the truth about who you are and what you have or haven’t done. It’s up to you to reclaim your identity.
If you don’t, there’s a possibility that your distorted self becomes your new self. You come to believe the false accusations.
“If they’re calling me stupid repeatedly, maybe I am stupid.”
This projective identification is harder to reverse and recover from.
7. Weaponizing projection to further project
This is as deadly as it gets. Advanced manipulation.
Since their projections are realities to them, they use them as a weapon to project again.
They’ll say something like:
“I told you your wife is an evil person. I’ve told you that three times already.”
They think that just because they repeated their projections, that makes their projections real. Yes, they said it three times, but they were wrong all three times. Saying the wrong thing over and over doesn’t make it true.
How to respond to someone who is projecting
First, make sure they’re really projecting by looking for the above signs. You don’t want to project your own projection onto them. It’s possible that you’re the one who’s projecting but are unjustly accusing them of it.
With that out of the way, you have to consider what type of person they are. If you think they’re smart and you can help them see reality, great. If they’re not as objective as you’d like, you need a different approach.
Try opening their lid gently. Tell them it’s okay for them to have their flaws. You have them too. Most of us have been hurt and are healing. We’re all works in progress.
Avoid anger as much as possible. You can’t fight with a person who’s not even in the same reality as you.
Hanan Parvez( Author )
Hi, I’m Hanan Parvez (MBA, MA Psychology), founder and author of PsychMechanics. PsychMechanics has been featured in Forbes, Business Insider, Reader’s Digest, and Entrepreneur.
How to Spot Projection: Are Those Their Feelings, or Yours?
Dr. Sigmund Freud, a neurologist, is the father of psychoanalysis and first identified the concept of “projection. “
Source: Photo by Max Halberstadt via Christies (Wikipedia/Public Domain)
by Sue Kolod, Ph.D.
This post is in honor of Dr. Sigmund Freud on the occasion of the 165th anniversary of his birth.
In my psychotherapy practice, patients often complain that their spouse, close friend, or family member “projects” all the time. It usually sounds something like this:
“He was projecting on me!”
“I told her to stop projecting!”
Projection occurs when a person attributes a quality to another person that really comes from themselves.
Did you know that the concept of projection comes directly from Freud? Freud, who was trained as a neurologist, borrowed the term from neurology, where it referred to the capacity of neurons to transmit stimuli from one level of the nervous system to another.
People project all the time and it’s neither good nor bad, depending on which qualities are projected and whether or not they are denied in the self.
Projection can be the basis of wonderful qualities such as empathy, generosity, and romantic feelings—or negative qualities such as rage, greed, and contempt.
Projection both helps people to fall in love and also to hate and revile others.
But in common parlance, projection refers to negative qualities that are denied in the self and are seen as coming from the other person.
It’s easy to see when someone else is projecting. It’s a lot more difficult to notice when you’re the one projecting. Why? Because projection is unconscious.
Why Do People Project?
We often identify unpleasant, negative qualities in others that we hate in ourselves. This process occurs unconsciously.
Let’s take Freud’s classic example: a man who has been unfaithful to his wife but who accuses his wife of cheating on him. This man, who I’ll call Herr M, has high moral standards for himself. He thinks of himself as a good person, a good husband, a solid citizen. He is extremely critical of himself for engaging in infidelity but can’t seem to stop. Herr M unconsciously disowns and denies the fact of his own infidelity which he would find unacceptable in another person, and projects it onto his wife, thus making her into the “bad one.”
In Herr M’s mind, the fact of his own infidelity has nothing to do with his suspicions of his wife. This is sometimes called “compartmentalization,” as he keeps his infidelity in a separate, sealed-off compartment. This allows him to feel like a good person when he is engaging in behavior that is unacceptable to him.
Another Type of Projection
Here is another example from my practice: Sarah has always been a “good girl,” which to her means that she never expresses anger or aggression. If she ever starts to feel angry toward someone, she quickly pushes away that feeling and tries hard to be nice. If her husband, Jim, makes a request of her, like asking her to put away her mail, she often responds by insisting that he is angry at her. Jim is baffled by this since he did not feel angry when he made the request. However, Sarah, who is unaware of her own anger, agrees to put away the mail but then “forgets” which does make Jim angry, becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Homophobia
Homophobia, defined as a dislike or hatred of gay people, is an excellent example of projection.
Consider Sam. He comes from a very religious background. Although he considers himself to be heterosexual, he sometimes finds himself having romantic fantasies about two very attractive gay men at his workplace. He dismisses the thought he could be sexually attracted to another man and avoids the men. Eventually, he convinces himself that they’re promiscuous and want to seduce him. He sees the sexual attraction as coming from them, not from himself. As a result, Sam views the gay co-workers as “bad people.”
Paranoia
In its most extreme form, projection is the basis of paranoia. Fears of persecution, irrational hatred of an individual or group, jealousy in the absence of evidence of betrayal, and the belief that a desired person who is taboo for whatever reason desires you, all result from the projection of unconscious negative states of mind onto another person. Paranoia, then, involves the denial of a personal tendency and the belief that this tendency is coming from the other person.
Are You Projecting?
It’s easy to notice when other people are projecting. It’s a lot more difficult to notice this tendency in ourselves.
Here are some signs that you might be projecting:
- Feeling overly hurt, defensive, or sensitive about something someone has said or done.
- Feeling highly reactive and quick to blame.
- Difficulty being objective, getting perspective, and standing in the other person’s shoes.
- Noticing that this situation or your reactivity is a recurring pattern.
If you notice any of these, ask yourself:
- Is the behavior I dislike in this person something I find intolerable in myself?
- In what ways do I act like this person?
- What types of stories am I telling myself about this person or situation?
- Who or what does this person or situation remind me of?
If you can accept all of your thoughts and feelings and not try to get rid of them, you won’t need to project them onto others. In addition, you will become a more tolerant and flexible person.
Susan Kolod, Ph.D., is co-Chair of the Committee on Public Information and co-editor of the blog “Psychoanalysis Unplugged” at the American Psychoanalytic Association. She is a supervising and training analyst, faculty, and co-founder of the blog “Contemporary Psychoanalysis in Action” at the William Alanson White Institute. Dr. Kolod has a private practice in Manhattan and Brooklyn.
Facebook/LinkedIn image: Dmytro Zinkevych/Shutterstock
“You yourself wanted it!”: how projections poison our relationships
Relationship crisis
- Photo
- Getty Images
“how difficult it is with you”… If you have said something like this at least once in your life, it means that you are familiar with the projection. To project is to attribute to another person (or even an inanimate object) feelings, thoughts, or intentions that actually belong to you. This is a protective mechanism of our psyche, which we inherited from childhood: this is how we make the complex external world simpler and more understandable. Psychoanalyst Saverio Tomasella states: “Projections are an inevitable companion of communication.” But if we use them too often, it becomes a problem.
Why are we doing this?
We all use projection from time to time. “It helps us overcome the barrier between ourselves and others: we imagine, we interpret, we guess,” explains Saverio Tomasella. At the very beginning of a relationship, our projections play a positive role. “We attribute to our chosen one traits that reinforce our first impression. Thanks to them, until recently, a stranger seems familiar to us and even relatives. This is the phase of idealization, when the partner seems to us to consist of nothing but virtues. The problem is that this state does not last forever. Sooner or later, we begin to look more soberly at the one who is next to us. And when the image created by our projections conflicts with reality, we often experience disappointment.
When are projections harmful?
If positive projections bind us to each other and make it easier and more comfortable, then negative projections, on the contrary, complicate relationships. Negative projections arise because of the discrepancy between the image of a partner that we have created in our head and his real behavior, as well as because of our habit of predicting other people’s reactions and thinking for others. Situations in which the projection mechanism is triggered happen all the time. He came home from work late and did not warn, without enthusiasm he praised the new dress, and now suspicions arise in his head with lightning speed: he was offended, cheating, fell out of love. These thoughts begin to control our behavior – for example, make us act cold or start to find fault with a partner for any reason. And he may never understand what the matter is, and begin to build his conclusions on the basis of his own projections.
What is the danger?
If there are too many projections in our communication, they create an atmosphere of mutual distrust and doubt. And the consequences will not keep you waiting. Over time, you may get the feeling that the partner does not understand, does not know and does not love you. “This problem can be exacerbated if one of the two is internally vulnerable, has attachment problems, is depressed,” Saverio Tomasella warns. In the worst-case scenario, projections can lead to a break – if one of the partners does not want to analyze their reactions and believes that his reproaches and suspicions have serious grounds. “It all depends on whether each of the partners can look at the situation from the outside and accept their responsibility for the relationship,” says Tomasella.
How to deal with it?
Know yourself. Each of us has our own sensitive buttons that trigger the projection mechanism. Of course, it is difficult to predict when they will work. But try to watch yourself. Learn to track your reactions as they arise. For example, you know that you tend to lose your temper when someone criticizes your family. You have noticed that your partner does not wear the tie your father gave you. You immediately react: “Oh, so you think my father has no taste?”
Don’t be afraid to admit you’re wrong . There is no need to be ashamed of projections – this is the natural way in which our psyche tries to keep us safe. It is much more important to admit that we could be wrong. If you realized that you were angry with your partner for no reason, tell him about it and explain what caused your reaction. With the help of sincerity, the negative effect of projection can be corrected.
Ask questions . We live at a fast pace and we talk a lot. Sometimes even too much. Such communication is a breeding ground for projections: we do not always have time to realize what our interlocutor is saying, but we quickly respond. If the conversation touches on a topic that is sensitive to you or your interlocutor, it is especially important to ask questions. For example, your partner came home late from work. Maybe an urgent task fell on him, his boss did not let him go. Ask about it. So you not only clarify the situation, but also demonstrate your participation.
To develop wisdom in oneself. As we get to know each other, it becomes easier for us to understand where the boundaries are, what sharp corners should be avoided so as not to provoke a conflict. Such caution does not humiliate us, but, on the contrary, demonstrates our maturity in relationships. Ultimately, the main thing is our desire to know the other person for who he is and to love him.
For details, see the Doctissimo Portal website.
Text: Anton Soldatov
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what it is, examples and types, causes of projections
What is a projection?
In psychology, projection is the transfer of one’s undesirable qualities onto other people. In fact, this is a protective mechanism of the psyche, allowing the individual not to feel guilty and responsible for his own negative traits, thoughts, desires and actions. He, as it were, moves away from them, appointing them as the source not of himself, but of those around him. This allows him to protect himself from feelings and postpone the solution of the problem indefinitely.
The term “projection” is derived from the Latin word projectio, which can be translated as “I throw forward” or “I throw myself away. ” This concept was introduced into psychology by Sigmund Freud.
The mechanism of action of the projection looks something like this:
- A person is faced with the fact that the realization of certain desires or forms of behavior is impossible because of their immorality, unacceptability or for other reasons.
- Experiences cause great discomfort. An internal conflict arises due to the fact that it is impossible to either satisfy the forbidden desire or get rid of it.
- In an effort to alleviate this condition, person projects his desires and urges onto other people or extends them to a large group (generalizes to consider this “the norm”).
For example, a tyrannical boss who constantly reproaches his subordinates for slowness is most likely projecting onto them the discontent that his own laziness causes in him. And a husband who constantly suspects his wife of infidelity is most likely not very faithful himself.
How do projections work?
Projections are a protective mechanism of the psyche that allows people to truth their own negative qualities, get rid of guilt and responsibility for their own shortcomings or ugly actions. For example, a greedy person believes that greed is a natural trait common to all people in general. A quick-tempered and prone to conflict considers others aggressive, and one who cannot be faithful is constantly trying to convict his “half” or the entire opposite sex of infidelity.
Projections have another important function – they help to cope with psychic trauma caused by other people. For example, if a person was cheated in the market, he may henceforth assume that every seller strives to deceive the buyer. And the one who happened to survive betrayal by a loved one may come to the conclusion that there are simply no truly faithful people in the world. Thus, he alleviates his suffering, convincing himself that it was not he who was unlucky in love, but in general the whole world works like that.
Projections are often based on inductive thinking. Conclusions drawn about one person apply to a large group or even to all people.
Most often, projections are associated with various manifestations of dishonesty. People who project their own shortcomings onto others are usually said to “not see the beam in their own eye, but see the tiniest speck in someone else’s.” And this metaphor describes the situation really well. Such a person projects his own negative traits onto others, which he is not able to suppress, but cannot accept either.
Types and examples of projections
As we noted above, projections are most often associated either with the spread of one’s own traits to other people, or with an inductive generalization of someone else’s behavior, which caused a mental trauma. But there are other options. Psychologists distinguish the following types of projection:
- Attributive. The basic principle of attributive projection is described by the phrase: “Others feel the same as I do. ” It serves to justify one’s own negative traits, thoughts, desires and actions. For example, an unfaithful husband understands that he is acting ugly, but he does not want to consider himself a bad person. So he convinces himself that all married men behave the same way.
- Autistic. The principle of this form of projection can be stated as: “Other people’s desires meet my needs.” That is, a person evaluates the behavior of others, taking into account their current desires and expectations. For example, a lonely girl in need of love perceives all the actions of the surrounding men as a manifestation of romantic interest in her (or, conversely, indifference).
- Rational. This is the shifting of one’s irresponsibility, laziness and one’s own mistakes onto other people. For example, if a couple is faced with an unplanned pregnancy, the guy may blame the girl, and the girl blame him. Although both of them needed to think about contraception, not silently shifting this responsibility onto each other.
- Complementary. This type of projection is described by the phrase: “I must control everything, because without my control everything will be done wrong.” That is, a person considers others helpless and incompetent, unable to do the job right without him.
Reasons for creating projections
As social beings, we constantly feel the need to communicate with other people. However, communication is not always pleasant. Sometimes it irritates, angers, upsets or discourages. This happens even when communicating with loved ones and loved ones. And it is in this case that the negative from unpleasant communication poisons our psyche most of all. And to throw off the burden of heavy thoughts allows you to transfer your own and other people’s traits to others.
Projection allows us to adjust the balance between good and evil in our favor. With its help we relieve ourselves of responsibility for immoral desires and committed mistakes , make our shortcomings not so terrible, spreading them to others. Also, the projection allows us to cope with painful memories of how we were offended, deceived or insulted by projecting the traits of the offender onto a large number of people.
No matter what form of projection a person uses, what traits they project and on whom, the goal is always to “reshape” the surrounding reality a little in their favor.
Projection is a kind of cognitive “speculation” in that we tend to judge all people by ourselves. We attribute to them our own thoughts, needs, experiences, desires, goals, principles, values, and so on. Most people have this kind of inductive perception of others. In some basic things, this really works, but you should not rely on this approach, trying to understand other people’s motives.
Thus, assuming that everything is arranged in the same way in everyone’s head, a person comes to the conclusion that all people have the same destructive thoughts and desires as he does. Of course, he wants this assumption to be correct – so he can be like everyone else, stay on the side of good (or, at least, not be evil).
In other words, projection allows a person to maintain inner integrity by transferring his own shortcomings onto other people. Otherwise, it may look different. By projecting his own “secret desires” onto those who are nearby, he convinces himself that he lives in harmony with his loved ones, protects them from something, pursues their interests, and not his own. He may also project dark traits of his personality onto outsiders or a large social group, convincing himself that this is natural for most people.
Negative influence of projections
As we found out above, projections are a mechanism for protecting the psyche from discomfort arising from the awareness of one’s shortcomings, destructive qualities, mistakes, mental trauma and other factors that disturb mental balance. Thus, there is a certain benefit from them, and yet psychologists believe that there is more harm. They call such negative consequences as:
- Distortion of reality. Projections can be seen as a kind of escapism. A person simply hides from the problem, puts it off for later. And the more problems he puts aside, the more he moves away from a correct understanding of reality. As a result, his actions and decisions may not lead to the consequences that he expected
- Unreasonable conflicts. Since the individual who resorts to projections does not perceive reality correctly, the reaction of the people around him to his actions often does not correspond to his expectations. Because of this, interpersonal conflicts and other undesirable situations associated with misunderstanding often arise. At the same time, such a person always blames his opponents, accusing them of excessive conflict, and never notices his own guilt.
- Lack of prospects. Success can only be achieved by a person who knows the value of his mistakes and knows how to predict the consequences of his actions. But people who are prone to projection tend not to admit their own mistakes, make incorrect predictions, and are generally less successful in interpersonal and social interaction.
- Loss of opportunities for self-development. A person who clearly sees his shortcomings can understand in which direction he should develop. People who project their own shortcomings onto others do not see the need for self-development. They misunderstand their responsibility for their own lives and even their own role in their lives.
How to get rid of projections?
This is the case when understanding the problem is a significant part of the solution. Therefore, should start by identifying its projections. To do this, try to pay attention to those qualities that annoy you in other people: in relatives, friends, bosses, colleagues, subordinates, politicians and celebrities. And be sure to try on the noticed shortcomings on yourself – it is quite likely that you have had them all this time.
If someone seems like a slacker to you, you may be dissatisfied with your own progress at work. If you think that everyone is jealous of you, you should consider whether you are jealous of someone. If it seems to you that you are being used, perhaps you yourself perceive people from the consumer side and are simply upset that “the balance of mutual benefit has been upset.” Always think about why some aspects of someone else’s behavior excite you so much – it is likely that you will be able to detect another projection.
Gradually it will get easier. You will learn to quickly recognize projections, and then it will be easy to deal with them. Just don’t jump to conclusions. And when it seems to you that another person has some kind of negative trait, carefully analyze this impression – perhaps this is your problem, not his. And as a useful bonus, you will learn to notice how other people use projections, and take action in time when these projections are directed against you.