Tips about men: Relationship Advice from Men – Best Relationship Tips for Women
101 Style Tips for Men
It can seem like there’s a lot to know about good style, and there is, at least if you want to be enrolled in its master class. But looking sharper than 99% of other guys is actually fairly simple and merely requires knowing and doing little stuff right. The kind of stuff that can be encapsulated into short, easy-to-remember principles and adages.
Below you’ll find the best of the best of such tips: a hundred things (plus one extra) that you can be doing, right now, to make yourself look sharper. You can thank us later.
1. Throw out or give away anything you haven’t worn in over a year.
You get two “beloved old favorite” exemptions here, as well as formalwear. Ruthlessly pitch or donate the rest.
2. Get everything adjusted.
Well, okay, not everything. But most things: nice pants, shirts, and jackets should all go to the tailor for adjustments, unless they came custom-tailored already.
Here’s what can and can’t be adjusted on your clothes.
3. Spend more money on less pieces of clothing.
Quality lasts longer than quantity, and you look better in it.
4. Shop for a suit in person.
Even if you don’t need one. Just get the experience of comparing jacket styles, fabrics, and cuts.
Make sure fit is your number one consideration.
5. There are more shoe colors than brown and black.
Colored leather and suede are fantastic shoe options. Get a little crazy with reds, blues, and grays. Don’t worry about matching a belt to each one — a black belt with gray shoes or a brown one with oxblood red is fine.
6. Trouser cuffs should “break” on the tops of your shoes.
That means they rest very lightly on the leather itself. You shouldn’t have a gap between your pants and your shoes.
7. Wear a pocket square.
Any time you’re wearing a jacket. No exceptions.
Check out our tips for rocking a pocket square, and how to make your own no-sew version.
8. Buy something in a pattern that occurs nowhere else in your wardrobe.
9. Next time you go to put on jeans, grab a pair of slacks or chinos instead.
Then make the rest of the outfit work with them.
Check out our guide to khakis, as well as our gallery on how Steve McQueen rocked his.
10. Belts or suspenders — pick one.
Never both at the same time.
11. Wear a necktie when you don’t have to.
Just for fun.
Check out our infographic on necktie tips.
12. Watch any movie starring Cary Grant.
Now ask yourself: “What can I do to dress a little more like that?”
13. Gym shoes are for the gym.
Ditto athletic socks.
14. Wear a lightweight sweater under a sports jacket with some jeans.
Doesn’t that look good?
Check out more tips on layering your clothes and rocking a sports jacket and jeans.
15. Get a pair of colored trousers.
Something funky. Red, green, yellow, orange, whatever.
16. Go read a book on style.
Or a magazine. Or an article. Something about fashion. Old and out-of-date is okay, and even fun sometimes. Just get exposed to something new.
Check out our entire collection of style archives.
17. Match the color of your socks to the color of your trousers.
Most of the time. When you want to be daring, wear a bright, contrasting color instead.
18. Have a removable top layer.
In the dog days of summer, you can go with one shirt. The rest of the time, have at least two presentable layers on top. You never know when you’ll want to loan a lady your jacket/shirt/whatever.
19. Invest in a really nice suitcase and day bag.
Your luggage is part of your style.
Learn about choosing the right bag for your trip.
20. Shop with a friend.
Sales people are paid to sell you things whether they look good or not. Take a friend who’ll tell you to your face when you look like an idiot.
21. Own a watch you can wear with a good business suit.
Handsome. Functional. Classic. It’s amazing how such a small accessory can greatly enhance how you look and feel.
Read up on our wristwatch primer.
22. Understand contrast.
It will help you get the right amount in your outfits. If you don’t know what that is, read an article like this one.
23. Own more shoes.
How many pairs do you own? Get some more. Vary the styles. Shoes are the most underrated tools in a guy’s style arsenal.
Read up on the 3 types of shoes every man needs, as well as the dress shoe hierarchy.
24. Traditional light blue denim is a great color for jeans…
…if you’re building houses or ranching cattle. Otherwise, get a dark indigo instead of light blue, or go with a different color entirely.
25. Take your measurements.
Write them down and tuck them in your underwear drawer or something. They always come in handy when you’re shopping.
Here’s how to accurately take your own measurements.
26. Check the size of your favorite pieces of clothing.
Those numbers are worth writing down too. If a shirt fits perfectly, you probably want your other shirts in about that size as well.
27. Always dress like you might decide to drop by a restaurant or nightclub with a dress code.
Because you might. And even if you don’t, you might as well look like a guy who’s got plans.
28. Practice rolling up your shirtsleeves a bunch of different ways.
Do you like a fat roll? A thin one? Tall, short, rumpled, crisp? Play around with it.
Check out the complete guide to rolling your shirt sleeves.
29. Flip through a slideshow of images from a men’s fashion show.
Nine-tenths of the things you see will be way over the top and useless to you. Use the other 10% for inspiration.
30. Head to a thrift store and buy every sports jacket that fits you…
…and costs less than $20. Okay, maybe not every single one, but at least four or five. Even the weird ones. You’ll use them.
Learn more about outfitting your wardrobe from the thrift store.
31. Button-down collars aren’t business dress.
Yeah, you’ll see guys wearing them with suits. Don’t be those guys. A business suit deserves a business collar, and that means no buttons at the tips.
32. Shine your shoes more often than you think you need to.
About once a month is good.
Get the lowdown on shining your shoes.
33. Wear a boutonnière in your lapel.
Not for a wedding, and not with a tux. Just for fun some day. Any old suit or sports jacket will do.
Nervous about pulling it off? Read this guide to wearing a flower with manly style.
34. Put some product in your hair.
If you already use product, try a different kind of product.
35. Iron your own shirts.
It’s a useful skill for traveling, and it’ll save you money at home.
Check out our illustrated guide on how to iron your dress shirts.
36. Get some dress slacks without belt loops. Then wear ’em with suspenders.
37. Don’t wear T-shirts with graphics on them…
…for anything that isn’t housework, a workout, or a rock concert. Upgrade to a solid-color tee, or another lightweight option like a henley or polo.
Be sure to read the best damn guide to t-shirts on the internet.
38. Try a decorative lining.
Suit and sports jackets sometimes come with them; as do some dress shirt cuffs.
39. Wear jewelry.
Not every day, and not always the same piece. But a ring here or a necklace there is great.
Check out our guide to wearing jewelry, as well as our ring-wearing primer.
40. Have two nice white dress shirts.
Be sure they’re free of stains and wrinkles, ready to go at all times. They go with everything.
41. Try wearing cologne.
You can get small testers from most department stores. Try a few and see what goes well with your natural scent.
Check out our guide to wearing fragrances.
42. Clean your wallet out regularly.
The slimmer it is, the less wear and tear on both the wallet and the pocket it’s shoved into. It’ll also look nicer when you pull it out to pay for things.
43. Wear a scarf.
Not just because it’s cold outside, but also as a fashion accessory.
Make sure you know a few different ways to tie your scarf, too.
44. Expand your belt collection.
The easiest way is to own belts that can snap open for interchangeable buckles, and then to hit the internet looking for vintage buckles — that way you’re only buying two or three pieces of leather for dozens of looks.
45. Own at least one dark business suit.
Then, if you can afford it, own one lighter social suit as well.
Check out what we like to call “the suit ladder.”
46. Use patterns to flatter your body type.
Grab broad checks to add a little weight and breadth, or use light vertical stripes to add height and slim down your appearance.
47. Live it up a little.
Wear that Hawaiian shirt or those bright red pants once in a while. Nobody needs to be the textbook timeless gentlemen every day of his life.
Maybe try wearing pink every now and then too.
48. Get your jackets pressed.
Light, unstructured ones are particularly prone to wrinkling, so press ’em early and often. Rumpled backs ruin the whole look.
49. Gold or silver metals — pick one.
Your wedding band is an exception. But other than that, keep it to one kind of metal.
50. Clean your clothes regularly.
Launder the things that can be; take what can’t to the dry cleaners. Brush wools off to keep them from pilling and gathering fuzz.
New to, or not very good at laundry? We even have a guide for that.
51. Your necktie and pocket square can share a color family, but they shouldn’t be a perfect match.
They don’t even have to share colors — the square could complement a color from the shirt or jacket instead.
52. Sometimes less is more.
A couple plain, dark solid pieces with one bright accent can do more than a flashy, patterned suit or shirt.
53. Then again, sometimes more is more.
Go over the top with color and pattern once in a while — maybe when you have something to celebrate, or just when you’re in a really bouncy mood. But don’t make a habit of it.
54. Keep the top and bottom balanced.
If you’ve got a sleek, streamlined jacket and a simple shirt, don’t wear big, fuzzy pants with lots of texture. Similarly, don’t pair a cable-knit sweater with ultra-fine wool slacks. Stay consistent all the way up and down.
55. Wear seasonal colors.
Dark earth tones and shades in autumn, grays and blues in winter, colorful pastels in spring — you get the point.
56. Find an outdoors jacket that you really love.
Leather, wool, denim — doesn’t matter. Something battered and beloved that you can wear from the first cool days of fall on up to winter parka season, and again in the spring.
Consider the harrington — it’s been a men’s style staple for decades.
57. Brown or black leather — pick one.
They don’t all have to be identical shades, but you shouldn’t be rocking a black watchband with a brown belt or anything like that.
58. If you wear suits in the winter, wear a long wool overcoat.
Anything short enough that you can see the bottom of the suit jacket poking out beneath the hem of the coat doesn’t make the, ahem, cut.
Do your homework and get yourself a Swiss army overcoat.
59. Don’t believe in absolute rules.
White trousers after Labor Day. Plaids with stripes. You’re told not to do ’em, but there’s always a reason to break a rule once in a while. Don’t be afraid to. But remember that the “rules” are usually there for a reason, too, and use some common sense.
There’s nothing wrong with being the best-dressed guy in the room. Be aware of social norms — don’t wear a three-piece suit to serve meals at a soup kitchen or something — but in general, plan on looking nicer than other guys in your social group at any given gathering.
61. Learn a new necktie knot.
Heck, learn a dozen. Some are convenient, some are fancy, and a few are both. Know your favorites.
Here are 4 common necktie knots to get you started.
62. Laugh at trends.
They’re a way to separate style illiterates from their money. Keep your look timeless. Trends can be a fun inspiration if they appeal to your existing sense of style, but don’t pursue them just because they’re “in.”
63. If the designer’s logo is visible, it’s not as stylish as you think.
See previous point about trends, and add some emphasis. You’re nobody’s billboard. No visible brand names.
64. Pamper your skin.
Get some good skin cream and use it. Find the product that solves your particular problems, whether that’s oily skin, dry skin, or something else entirely.
65. Pair a nice suit with some colored canvas sneakers.
66. Own accent pieces.
Scarves, hats, jewelry, funky shoes, weird belts. Get some unique items and use them whenever an outfit looks okay, but boring. Thrift stores, eBay, and Etsy are all great sources for these.
67. Backpacks are for school kids.
If you’re not going to class right this minute, trade up to a messenger bag or a briefcase. For that matter, trade up even if you are in school.
68. Sunglasses are part of your look as soon as you put them on.
Own a couple pairs in a couple different styles — you’ll end up needing them as you vary your look.
69. Keep your jacket buttoned except when you sit.
The taper toward the waist is half the point of a jacket. Don’t lose the effect by going unbuttoned.
70. On that note, the bottom jacket button always stays undone.
Close the top button on a two-button coat, and either the middle button only or the top two buttons on a three-button coat. There are other looks, and someone’s always trying them out, but these will always be right.
Know the “Sometimes, Always, Never” rule.
71. Your outfit is only as good as the clothes in it.
At the end of the day, you can’t look like a runway model in clothes from Walmart. Be prepared to spend at least a little money if you want to look really good.
72. Fix damages sooner, rather than later.
Missing buttons, fraying edges, torn seams — get ’em into a tailor and get ’em fixed. No excuses. Wear and tear looks terrible in public.
On the road or in a pinch? Check out these 11 clothing hacks for fixing problems on the go.
73. Casual leather shoes make any everyday outfit look more stylish.
Have some good brogues, saddle shoes, or loafers for your day-to-day get-ups.
74. Don’t overthink it.
If everything fits and the colors aren’t an obvious clash, your outfit is probably presentable at the very least. The rest is just details.
75. Keep yourself well-groomed.
Trim your nails, shave regularly and with care, brush your teeth. A raggedy body under nice clothes jars the eye (and looks gross).
Keep a regular grooming routine with a checklist to stay on top of things.
76. Shirt cuffs should be visible past the ends of your jacket sleeves.
“A half inch of linen” is the old-fashioned rule of thumb. Don’t obsess about it too much, but show at least a little shirt cuff.
77. Ties can be fun.
Paisleys, variegated stripes, figure patterns, knits — mix it up. Look for textures beyond basic glossy silk (or synthetic) and for varied colors.
78. Pinstriped suits always look best with plain white pinstripes.
There are other options out there, but none are as timeless and sublime as the plain white pinstripe on a dark charcoal or navy suit.
79. Your cell phone is part of your style these days.
Get a case, and make that case something that works with your basic tastes. Funky is good; so is slim. The less of a bulge in your pockets, the better.
80. Yes, you can wear a double-breasted jacket.
It can even be a blazer, rather than a suit jacket, so long as you keep the trousers and shirt conservative. But don’t you dare wear that double-breasted jacket unbuttoned.
81. Wear the lightest fabrics in the summer.
If you don’t own at least a few pieces in lightweight linen or seersucker, you’re torturing yourself needlessly.
Check out more easy ways to boost your summer style.
82. Visit a menswear store you’ve never been to before.
See what you like. You never know.
83. The man purse is never going to catch on.
If you’ve been waiting for everyone to wake up and realize how stylish yours is, stop.
84. Jeans can sit on your hips. Everything else gets worn at the natural waist.
85. The shinier your shoe is, the dressier it is.
Assuming we’re talking about leather dress shoes, a higher gloss is dressier, while a softer texture is more casual.
86. Bow ties don’t just come in black.
Wear a patterned one in place of a regular necktie some time.
While you’re at it, bone up on how to tie a bow tie.
87. Tie your necktie so that the tip touches the top of your belt.
A little longer is okay; shorter is not.
88. Your off-duty clothes still get looked at.
Swimwear, pajamas, workout clothes — someone’s going to see you in them eventually. Buy ones you look good in, and replace them before they wear out.
89. Facial hair needs to look deliberate.
You can have a full beard if you really want one, but shape the edges with a razor so that it doesn’t look like you’ve just let it grow. You want people to think you’re making a statement, not being lazy.
Check out the science behind what your facial hair signals to others.
90. You want people to notice your face.
Wear clothes that guide the eye upward toward your chin and mouth. There’s a reason classic menswear tends to open upward (think about collared shirts and suit jackets).
91. If you mix patterns, vary the scale of the patterns.
Small checks with wide-spaced stripes — no problem. Big checks with big stripes — problem.
92. Dress the body you have, not the body you want.
It’s great to be working towards a fitter physique, but don’t look like a total schlump until you get there.
Here are some style tips for larger men, as well as advice for skinny guys.
93. Have one or two big, soft flannels or cardigans for cool nights.
Half the time you’ll end up giving these to a girl to wear when she gets cold — and that’s just fine.
94. Organize your wardrobe.
Make it easy to reach in, grab any couple of items, and have an outfit that works. That means finding a home for the less-stylish utility pieces that’s far away from your good clothes.
95. Never let a woman plan your outfits.
Even fashionable women are working with a different stylistic language from you. Unless one or both of you are cross-dressers, don’t make a habit of taking regular style advice from a woman.
96. Pants beat shorts, even in hot weather.
Shorts cut the leg in two; a pair of lightweight linen, seersucker, or cotton pants will create a sleeker, more put-together silhouette, and always look better than shorts, while only being slightly warmer to wear.
If you do wear shorts, at least follow this guide.
97. If you like a store, subscribe to their e-mail list.
Yeah, you’ll get advertisements that you don’t want. But you’ll also get sales and coupons that you will want, and that they don’t offer anywhere else. If you limit yourself to two or three of your top favorite brands, it’s well worth the inbox clutter.
98. Really good dress shoes make a bit of noise when you walk.
Don’t be shy about it. Embrace the authoritative tap-tap-tap of stacked leather heels.
99. Resist the urge to correct other people’s style.
Even when you know they’re doing something wrong. They’re not going to take it as a kindness no matter how sweetly you say it.
100. There are worse fates in life than dressing like someone’s dad.
Or even someone’s grandfather. The generations before us knew a thing or two about looking sharp.
And most important of all…
101. Never wear a bad fit!
Ever. If it isn’t a close, flattering fit with no pinching or sagging, don’t wear it. This is the ultimate rule for looking good. Seriously. If you’re going to take one thing away today, take this one. NEVER WEAR A BAD FIT.
Written By Antonio Centeno
Founder, Real Men Real Style
Click here to grab my free ebooks on men’s style
18 Essential Pieces Of Dating Advice For Men
Sunglasses are the quintessential accessory, something worn all over the world by men and women alike. They’re pretty clever little inventions, too: they go with literally everything, can be worn any time of year, they’re readily available, and they’re offered at every possible price point.
Many people don’t give much thought to their sunglasses. After all, it’s simple to walk into a shop, try a few pairs on, and walk out with them, right? Sure, but there’s actually more to them than very literally protecting your eyes.
Sunglasses can flatter and enhance your face shape (or, just the opposite!) and completely elevate or even change the vibe of your entire outfit. For example, picture yourself in a suit and tie. Now picture yourself in a pair of classic aviator sunglasses in a neutral color. Next, swap those sunglasses out for a pair of round glasses with a colored frame. Totally different look, right?
To help you make the best choices for your face – literally – we’ve put together this guide on men’s sunglasses. Here, you’ll find detailed information on all the best styles available, how to choose the best pair, plus our picks for the best men’s sunglasses in each category.
Whether you prefer bold colors or a more minimalist look, there’s something for everyone among the best new sunglasses for men.
1. The Wayfarer
Keep Smiling Photography/Shutterstock
A slightly retro style that’s somehow always perfectly on-trend, you can’t go wrong with a classic pair of wayfarers. Ray-Ban created the style in the post-WWII 1950s when people began to realize that sunglasses didn’t have to be solely about eye protection.
“Bad boy” celebrities including James Dean and Bob Dylan propelled wayfarers to mega popularity, but their moment in the spotlight has never faded. That’s largely because the style looks great on everyone and complements every style, from preppy to edgy rocker.
Because of their timelessness and versatility, there’s no trick to pulling off wayfarers – simply choose a pair you like and wear ‘em! Black or tortoiseshell finishes will always be the easiest to wear, but feel free to make them more of a statement piece and opt for a bright color.
Best for: all face shapes
Best Overall Wayfarers: Ray-Ban Original Wayfarer (style RB2140)
Best Premium Wayfarers: Persol PO3269S
Best Budget Wayfarers: Goodr The OGs A Ginger Soul
2. The Aviator
Aviators are one of – if not the – most iconic and recognizable sunglass style for men. So-named because they were very literally designed for pilots in the 1930s (in fact, they were originally called “pilot’s sunglasses”), aviators quickly crossed over into mainstream fashion. The style is widely considered to be the original sunglasses and is just as relevant today as it was nearly a century ago.
While classic aviators are about as timeless as sunglasses come, there’s some variation within the style. For example, Tom Cruise wore teardrop-style aviators in Top Gun, but there are also square aviators and more sporty styles with wider lenses, not to mention both metal and plastic-framed options.
Best for: all face shapes, but if you have a round face, be careful of choosing a pair that’s too wide. Choose a more narrow or angular pair to flatter your face.
Best Overall Aviators: Ray-Ban Standard Original 58 mm Aviator Sunglasses
Best Premium Aviators: MATSUDA Aviator Titanium Sunglasses
Best Budget Aviators: Prive Revaux The Commando
3. The Clubmaster (Horn-Rimmed)
At this point, it shouldn’t surprise you that Ray-Ban is responsible for bringing the “clubmaster” or horn-rimmed, sunglasses style into the mainstream. Heavily inspired by the “browline” style that was wildly popular in the 1950s, these men’s sunglasses feature a signature upper rim with larger, squared-off lenses, often rimmed in thin metal wire. The style is similar to wayfarers, but the distinct rim sets them apart.
Much like wayfarers, clubmaster sunglasses have a bit of a retro vibe but are timeless – wear them in any season, with anything, year after year. They’re especially popular in pop and hipster circles, as evidenced by the fact that celebrities including Bruno Mars and Robert Pattinson favor them.
Best for: Similarly to aviators and wayfarers, clubmasters are a universally flattering sunglass style. They look especially good on oval, rectangle, and round faces.
Best Overall Horn-rimmed Glasses: Warby Parker Ames
Best Premium Horn-rimmed Glasses: Persol 3218V Horn-Rimmed Glasses
Best Budget Horn-rimmed Glasses: Treehut Wooden Bamboo Sunglasses
4. Colored Frames
Live for color – or maybe just a pop of it? Consider a pair of sunglasses with colorful frames. This is one accessory that makes a statement, but it doesn’t have to be over the top.
You can choose your favorite color or opt for something soft that adds just the slightest splash. Or, go bold and pick a pair of sunglasses in a color you actually never wear but would love to!
Colorful-framed sunglasses come in all shapes and styles but are especially common in styles like wayfarers. Aviators and round-framed glasses also sometimes have colorful wireframes. While this sunglass style may initially seem very playful, that’s not necessarily true. For example, a pair of glasses with an olive green or navy blue frame adds a pop of color but is actually quite refined and neutral.
Best for: all face shapes
Best Overall Colored Frames: Warby Parker Barkley
Best Premium Colored Frames: Oakley Jawbreaker Retina Burn Prizm Road
Best Budget Colored Frames: Knockaround Paso Robles
5. Round Frames
True to their name, round sunglasses are characterized by perfectly (or near-perfect) circular lenses and frames. Many people associate round-framed sunglasses with both John Lennon and the Steampunk fashion movement, two extremely different styles. That speaks to their versatility: while they do have a cool vintage vibe, round glasses are also ultra-hip.
While not quite as iconic as wayfarers or aviators, round-framed glasses are some of the original types of eyewear. Dating back as early as the 13th century, portraits depict men wearing temple-less, round glasses. They’ve come a long way (i.e., they have temples now) and they’re very much a fashion statement on their own, so we recommend keeping the rest of your accessories to a minimum if you’re rocking round frames.
Best for: Square, heart-shaped, and oval faces. Avoid round frames if you have a round face.
Best Overall Round Sunglasses: Huckberry Cruisers
Best Premium Round Sunglasses: Oliver Peoples Cary Grant Sunglasses
Best Budget Round Sunglasses: SUNGAIT Vintage Round Sunglasses
6. Wooden Frames
Sunglasses with wooden frames have become significantly more popular in recent years, and we love the look. These glasses make a subtle statement and stand out, but in a completely different way than those with colored frames. Wooden sunglasses are refined and very unique and have a sporty, outdoorsy vibe. Plus, if they’re made of real wood (and most are), they’re also sustainable.
The most popular wooden frame sunglass styles are wayfarers and horn-rimmed, though you can find just about any pair. There are also plenty of options in terms of the wood style, with everything from light-colored bamboo and maple to darker walnut and oak.
Best for: all face shapes
Best Overall Wooden Frames: Shady Rays Classic Timber
Best Premium Wooden Frames: Ray-Ban RB4246M Clubhouse
Best Budget Wooden Frames: Cloudfield Polarized Bamboo Sunglasses
7. Notched Bridge
Actor and real-life race car enthusiast Steve McQueen favored notched bridge sunglasses in the 50s and 60s, making them extremely popular. This style can technically be almost any sunglass style, as the defining feature is the distinct – but very subtle – notch in the bridge piece just above the nose. The notch itself can be a more defined angular shape or more smooth and rounded, but these sunglasses will always have that signature.
Another unique feature of notched bridge sunglasses is that many of them can actually fold in half. This may seem a bit gimmicky at first, but the notch helps them to fold neatly, which is extremely helpful for storing and protecting them from damage. Notched bridge sunglasses have a bit of a retro 60s vibe, but have also stood the test of time and always look perfectly “now.”
Best for: all face shapes; look for a style that already flatters your face but has the signature notched bridge
Best Overall Notched Bridge Sunglasses: CAMP Topo Sunglasses
Best Premium Notched Bridge Sunglasses: Persol 33184S
Best Budget Notched Bridge Sunglasses: Blenders Amber Coast
8. Clear Frames
Clear frame sunglasses are fashion accessories in a category of their own. Much like colorful framed glasses, they make a statement, but it’s extremely subtle and distinctly elevated. Even more whimsical styles, like those with chunkier frames, somehow seem a bit more serious – but in a very good way.
One of the best things about sunglasses with clear frames is that they’re extremely easy to wear. They complement any look and they’re truly timeless, so wear them all year and with anything. We do recommend keeping the rest of your outfit a bit more scaled back and sticking with light-colored clothing to keep the look approachable and balance the clear, almost delicate look of the glasses.
Best for: all face shapes
Best Overall Clear Frames: Warby Parker Haskell
Best Premium Clear Frames: Ssense DITA Sequoia
Best Budget Clear Frames: Sunski Yuba
9. Mirrored Lenses
Although mirrored lenses can appear in literally any type of sunglasses, they’re so unique and distinct that they’ve created a category of eyewear all their own. They’ve been especially popular since the 1980s and you find them most commonly in aviators, wayfarers, round sunglasses, and oversized styles meant for sports.
If you opt for a pair of colored mirrored lenses, they act almost like a kaleidoscope, changing colors depending on the angle and lighting. This injects a dose of fun into any look, and they’re certainly eye-catching.
For a more subtle and ultra-cool-guy look, opt for mirrored lenses in black or silver. These still have that extra bit of wow factor but are much less bold and slightly easier to pair with an outfit. Mirrored lenses also have a slightly mysterious element, as people can’t see your eyes behind the lenses.
Best for: all face shapes
Best Overall Mirrored Lenses: Nike Passage Mirrored Sunglasses
Best Premium Mirrored Lenses: Costa Ferg XL
Best Budget Mirrored Lenses: Merry’s Polarized Aluminum Sunglasses
Simple Things ANY Guy Can Do To Look Better
You want to make a change in your life and transform yourself.
You want to be the most stylish man you can be.
Yet it can seem overwhelming – the clothing, the lifestyle, the attitude…
It doesn’t need to be that way. Being a man of class and style isn’t as difficult as you’d think.
Gentlemen, that’s why we’re going over 10 simple tips for men that will instantly make you seem like the man to know.
This article is brought to you by MAHI. MAHI’s high-quality, full grain leather bags are made to order meaning you can customize size, style and even have your initials embroidered. MAHI ships directly to their customers – this means no middlemen or expensive storage and the savings are passed on to you with no overspending.
MAHI bags will serve you for 50+ years if looked after properly. The full-grain leather duffel in my video is just $159.50 and that includes free shipping! And to show how much MAHI are confident in their quality, they give you 70 days of usage to report any fault or quality issues. Don’t overspend for quality, click here to check out MAHI’s classic satchel and use promo code RMRS to get 10% off your first purchase at MAHI.
Click Here To Watch The Video – 10 Simple Things ANY Guy Can Do To Look Better (Summer Edition!)
Alright gents, let’s get into it…
- Be the best-dressed man in the room
- Work out regularly
- Have great posture
- Get a leather bag
- Put on a suit
- Be a storyteller
- Be funny
- Slow down and use precise gestures
- Introduce yourself!
- Talk about your passions
1. Have The Courage To Be The Best-Dressed Man
Seeing as how we’re in the midst of summer, it’s a good time to bring in some hot (see what I did there?) tips for men.
Hot weather is no excuse to look like a slob, and layers aren’t necessary to look amazing. It’s the perfect time to practice doing more with less.
Penny loafers are a worthy addition to any man’s dress shoe collection.
The main weapon in your arsenal with which to counteract the searing heat should be linen. This material – extracted from flax – has been used for millennia as a luxury fabric for cultures used to the heat. It’s perhaps the most breathable fabric out there.
You can find any garment in linen – shirts, trousers, sport coats, you name it. Heck, you could make an entire suit of it. This is especially useful for you gentlemen who live in perpetually hot climates.
What about shoewear? Loafers are comfortable and stylish alternatives for the summer. These are simple slip-on shoes that serve to upgrade a casual outfit. These include penny loafers, boat shoes, and monkstraps.
Wearing a long-sleeved shirt? Make sure to roll up those sleeves!
2. Exercise Consistently
No, doing one set of push-ups won’t make you stylish. What I mean by this is to consistently exercise.
Why is this a simple but solid style tip for men? It may take a commitment to give you the physical results you need, but exercise yields immediate benefits. Physical activity releases endorphins, which put you in a good mood and also act as natural painkillers. These effects last for 12 hours!
A quick workout may be all that you need to feel great.
You don’t have to go nuts. Something brief like a jog or a set of push-ups every morning should do the trick.
Don’t underestimate the power of exercise.
3. Have Great Posture
This simple style tip for men is one you can practice every second.
Ok, this might sound a bit cliché at this point. We’ve all heard our parents scold us about it, but the fact is good posture is essential for a man’s long-term physical health and his confidence.
Click here to find out more about how posture can impact your style.
Let’s start with some health talk. What can good posture do for you? It keeps the bones and ligaments under the right alignment, which ensures that your muscles work right. It prevents backaches and also stops the spinal column from being fixed in an abnormal position.
The list goes on…
On a psychological level, good posture contributes directly to a solid appearance. It does a lot to project a man’s power and conviction to those around him.
4. Level Up Your Accessory Game – Get A Leather Bag
This simple style tip for men is invaluable. Accessories are among the most crucial aspects of a wardrobe to master.
Just think about how much we use bags. We use them for school and for work. Many of us use them for the gym, even to take a laptop over to a friend’s house. They’re among the most practical of tools at a man’s disposal – so why not invest in something as impeccable as the rest of your outfit?
Click here to check out MAHI’s classic duffle bag.
What are the advantages of a quality leather bag?
- Durability: Bags made of genuine leather can take a load of punishment, regardless of the bag time. They’ll likewise keep your belongings safe from the elements.
- Timelessness: Leather bags have been in style for centuries. They’re great for working at the office or in the outdoors. You can even pass them down!
- Saving money: It may seem like a hefty investment at first, but you’ll save yourself a heck of a lot of money after you stop buying low-quality bags over and over.
5. Wear A Suit (You Saw This Coming)
Gentlemen, it’s something we talk about a lot here in RMRS. One full-proof way to look absolutely stylish is to wear a well-fitted, quality suit.
A suit sends a message of professionalism, power, and attention to detail to those you meet.
It’s impossible to do such a topic justice with one section of an article so check out my article on how to shop for the perfect suit to get you started.
6. Be A Storyteller
The ability to tell a great story has been a treasured skillset for thousands of years. The Illiad – the oldest story ever told – was originally spoken to audiences. The power of a good story in influencing the masses can never be overstated.
With this comes mastering the art of conversation – something that isn’t easy, but the right guidance can see any man engaging with others in a meaningful way.
If you have stories to tell, then tell them. You’ll be surprised as to what sparks interest in people.
Need some good story starters? Here are some tips:
- Talk about what inspired you to launch your company, or follow your career track.
- Explain the challenges of that journey.
- Mention the lessons you learned.
- Talk a little about the goals that remain.
7. Be Funny
When it comes to simple style tips for men, this may seem like another obvious one. However, it’s important enough that it deserves a spot on our list.
Several studies have found links between humor cognition and verbal ability.
What does this mean in English? That there’s a connection between being funny and smart. Whenever you see a man constantly making others laugh, there’s a good chance he has the intellect to match.
Making people laugh is a sure-fire way of appearing more stylish.
The reason for this is that laughing releases dopamine. This not only makes us feel great but opens up the learning regions of the brain and makes it easier to retain information.
Do you need to be a comedian? No. The classiest sort of humor is high, dry humor as opposed to slapstick comedy.
8. Slow Down – No Wild Movements
Something we’ve talked about here in RMRS is how, when approaching a woman, she’ll most likely adopt a Prevention Stance. This was defined by a 2011 study from the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology as a typical response to a stranger’s presence.
It means that she’s suspicious and wary of you.
Gentlemen, I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t only apply to women. Using open body language is a good rule of thumb to coax people out of that Prevention Stance. To do this, you need to use slow and deliberate gestures.
Make sure to always speak calmly and face the other person.
You need to keep your hands unclenched and in sight. Most importantly, you need to speak in a cool, relaxed manner.
9. Introduce Yourself
While I’m on the topic of socializing, I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention introducing yourself.
This is a simple but important style tip for men because it’s the very first step in building a relationship of any kind. It has the ability to leave a powerful impression and – when done right – can forge a meaningful relationship.
A strong introduction can be what changes your life for the better.
How do you make the right introduction? Check out these tips:
- Less is more. Keep it brief. That way conversations can reveal more about you in a naturally-flowing manner.
- Keep your introduction in context. Unless you’re in a business setting, your job title is irrelevant.
- Focus on the other person. Allow them to make a longer introduction in turn, if they like.
10. Be Passionate And Talk About Those Passions
Are you into Star Wars? Game of Thrones? What about the supernatural? No matter what you love, you need to talk about it.
We’ve all been there; the restaurant where people are droning on and on about something you couldn’t care less about. You can’t wait to get out, and it’s obvious. Seeing that expression only serves to bring the mood of the entire room down.
Always share your passions – you’ll be surprised at how it captivates everyone.
Instead, once you catch a lull in the conversation, bring up the topic of your choice. Make sure it’s something you love deeply, and go to town. Even if other people aren’t into it, that positivity you’ll exude will spread over to them.
Summary – 10 Simple Things ANY Guy Can Do To Look Better
Let’s go over the simple things that any guy can do to up his game and look AMAZING;
- Be the best-dressed man in the room
- Work out regularly
- Have great posture
- Get a leather bag
- Put on a suit
- Be a storyteller
- Be funny
- Slow down and use precise gestures
- Introduce yourself!
- Talk about your passions
With these easy tips, you’ll be well on your way to being the most stylish man in the room – whether it be through appearance or speech.
Click here to check out MAHI and get the best bang for your buck.
This article is brought to you by MAHI. MAHI’s high-quality, full grain leather bags are made to order meaning you can customize size, style and even have your initials embroidered. MAHI ships directly to their customers – this means no middlemen or expensive storage and the savings are passed on to you with no overspending.
MAHI bags will serve you for 50+ years if looked after properly. The full-grain leather duffel in my video is just $159.50 and that includes free shipping! And to show how much MAHI are confident in their quality, they give you 70 days of usage to report any fault or quality issues. Don’t overspend for quality, click here to check out MAHI’s classic satchel and use promo code RMRS to get 10% off your first purchase at MAHI.
16 Essential Style Tips For Guys Who Want to Dress Better –
“I’m just not naturally stylish.”
Does that sound familiar?
Here’s the truth. Dressing well is a skill. And like any other skill, you can learn it and improve. Don’t believe me?
Yes, that’s me in high school rocking a terrible ponytail, along with glasses that were way too small for my head.
And to flesh out the image, my daily outfit in high school consisted of:
It wasn’t until college did I start paying attention to my style in a serious way. And if that kid above could learn, so can you.
In fact, you have a huge advantage as an Essential Man reader. I didn’t have a real resource, and had to go through years of trial and error before I’ve truly learned what great style was.
Today I’m sharing with you essential style tips for guys who want to dress better.
Whether you’re a complete beginner, or have been working on your style for a while and need a refresher, I’ve refined these concepts and tips over the last 11 years to help you look your best in no time.
Heads up! I put together a special beginner’s bonus for this post to help you kickstart your new style in less than 10 mins!
Download my “How Clothes Should Fit You” Cheatsheets. You’ll learn “clothing fit” hacks that’ll help you find clothes that fit, cut your shopping time in half, and make you look really fucking good – even if you have a “weird” body type.
You can learn these simple tricks in 10 minutes. And best of all, it’s free! Just enter your info below and I’ll send it to you!
Success! Check your email for your bonus!
1. REALIZE THAT DRESSING WELL IS A SKILL
Just like cooking or shooting free throws, dressing well is a skill that can actually be learned.
My job as a personal stylist isn’t to buy clothes for guys and send them on their way. I teach men how to choose clothes that enhance them so they can do it on their own. If dressing well wasn’t a skill that could be taught, I’d be out of a job!
With all skills, you get better the more you practice. And unless you live in some weirdo nudist colony (I would apologize here, but if you’re a nudist reading this blog, you’re in the wrong place), you need to get dressed everyday. That means you have an opportunity to practice and nurture the skill of dressing well every single day.
WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY: Nobody is born in a perfectly tailored 3-piece suit, or with some magical intuition on how to dress well. (If you need a reminder, scroll back up and look at my high school picture again.) Realize that dressing well is a skill that can be developed through practice.
2. DEVELOP YOUR “EYE” BY IDENTIFYING STYLE YOU LIKE
Right after guys tell me that they’re just not “naturally stylish”, it’s often followed up with:
“I just don’t have an eye for putting together outfits or knowing what looks good”
Here’s what I tell them:
“Ok. Is there anyone who’s style you think looks good? Something you think ‘I’d like to dress like that’, even if you don’t think you could pull it off. Maybe it’s a celebrity, a musician, an athlete? Even a fictional character. Some of my clients have mentioned James Bond or Tony Stark before.”
The guy will then list off a ton of men he thinks dresses cool. And then I like to point out that he just debunked his own assumption that he doesn’t have an “eye”. He just showed me he can see and recognize great style!
Now, he might not know the why yet, and that’s often the reason why guys tell me they don’t have an eye. Understanding why is learnable.
But whenever you’re working on a goal, it’s important to identify and challenge stories you tell yourself. Whether it’s that you don’t have an eye for style, you’re too busy to work out, or you’re just a shy person. The stories we tell ourselves are often invisible barriers to keep us in our comfort zone.
WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY: Take 5 minutes. List out 3 or more guys who style you think looks great and that is in the direction you’d like to go. Even if you don’t think you can pull it off, list it. It could be someone you know, a celebrity, or even a fictional character from a movie.
3. SOLVE 90% OF YOUR STYLE PROBLEMS BY GETTING THE RIGHT FIT
“F*@K Ryan Gosling!”
This is something an actual client said to me once after seeing the picture of Ryan Gosling above.
“How the hell does he look so cool wearing just a t-shirt and jeans?”
The answer, my friend, is fit.
Fit is the most important thing when it comes to great style. It’s so important, in fact, that I tell every one of my clients “wearing clothes that fit properly will solve 90% of your style problems.”
When clothes don’t fit properly, they throw off your body proportions. Because of the excess fabric, clothes that are too big make you not only look sloppy, but fatter and shorter than you are.
Men have the tendency to wear clothes that are too big for them because it either “feels more comfortable”, or they just don’t know how clothes are supposed to fit in the first place.
The right fit is how someone like Ryan Gosling (or me, or you) can look effortlessly stylish rocking a plain white t-shirt and jeans, and how someone can look terrible in a “nice suit” that probably cost 20x more.
This also means if you think you need a suit in order to look stylish, you don’t!
If you’re more leather jacket and jeans like me, you can be leather jacket and jeans and look great, as long as you’re wearing clothes that fit right.
WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY: “How Clothes Should Fit You” Cheatsheets which shows you my trick to mastering the perfect fit for your shirts and pants in 10 minutes.
4. SURROUND YOURSELF WITH STYLISH PEOPLE (EVEN IF IT’S ONLINE)
When making any change in your life, especially something that’s physical like your style, the biggest roadblock is going to be the most surprising.
When it comes to the people around you now, your friends and family, your girlfriend, your coworkers, there is a high likelihood that they won’t all have a positive reaction to your change.
If you want to work with me one on one as a client, you have to agree to work with me solo. That means your girlfriend or wife is not allowed to sit in to any of our sessions or shopping trips.
I created this rule after working with a client whose wife insisted she sit in in our styling sessions. She would give me feedback on every single piece of advice I’d give. Her notes and comments amounted to “He doesn’t like that, he prefers to wear this.” Essentially negating any advice I would give.
She was enabling his bad style.
After a couple of weeks, I promptly refunded his money and created this rule.
Change is uncomfortable for people. It makes them face the reality that someone is working hard to improve, and it challenges what they’re doing for themselves.
One of my favorite quotes of all time is “You are the average of 5 people around you.” Who we surround ourselves with has an extremely important impact on our actions, behaviors, and mindsets.
This is why wealthy successful businessmen tend to be friends with each other. It’s why fit attractive Crossfitters are surrounded by fit attractive Crossfitters in Instagram pics. And it’s why obese parents are more likely to have obese kids.
When it comes to your style, that’s exactly what you need if you want to improve. You need to surround yourself with people with the same goals as you.
WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY: The simplest change you can make is to start following stylish people on places like Instagram. It’ll give you a double whammy: It’ll expose you to great style and give you some inspiration, but it’ll also create an environment where dressing well is “normal”. Need some stylish Instagram recommendations? Check out this post I wrote about my favorite stylish Instagrams here.
5. FOCUS ON A CLASSIC STYLE FIRST BEFORE TRYING TO DEVELOP A PERSONAL STYLE
Steve McQueen, Classic style, timeless cool
A mistake people make when trying to improve their style is thinking they need to create an original, 100% unique personal style.
This is a classic example of what’s called “Extreme thinking”.
Want to lose 20lbs?
“Ugh. I have to give up bread, rice, beer, alcohol, candy, meat AND have to do some crazy crossfit workout, and spend 2 hours at the gym. Forget it”
Want to save money for a vacation?
“That means I have to cancel my Netflix account, stop going out on weekends, defer my student loans. I probably had to miss some credit card payments if I ever want to have fun. That’s going to ruin my credit. I’m never gonna be able to relax on vacation now.”
When you’re starting to improve your style, think of it like how chefs learn to cook:
They don’t go into the kitchen thinking they need to create some amazing and original dish never seen before.
They learn the classic recipes and techniques first. Then they start adding bits and pieces of their personality and interests in to put a spin on them.
You’re going to do the exact same thing with your style.
Focus on classic styles first, then slowly add your own personal spin later.
WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY: I write about classic styles in my “Essentials” series, you can see all the Essentials I’ve written about so far by clicking here.
6. THIS ALSO MEANS BUY CLASSIC STYLES FIRST BEFORE DABBLING INTO TRENDS
Tell me if this sounds familiar:
You open your closet. It’s filled with clothes.
You sift through all the hangers squeezed into your cramped closet and think to yourself “I have nothing to wear.”
So you go to the mall and buy even more clothes.
Then a month later, the same thing happens. You have “nothing” to wear.
You’re not going crazy.
This is what I call “Panic mode shopping”. You open your closet and freak out because things are outdated, they’re hard to mix, and there are so many choices. So you go out and buy more clothes and add to the problem.
It’s a vicious cycle. And one of the biggest reasons for this problem is trendy clothes.
Trendy translates to what’s cool now. It’s what all the blogs and magazines are talking about. It’s what’s in the stores. And because it’s new and fresh, it’s a little exciting.
But the big problem with any trend is that it eventually dies down.
Remember how leather sweatpants were really popular a couple years ago? And what about double monk shoes before that? Or if you’re old like me, trucker hats?
Trendy clothes are like that big Summer blockbuster that you can’t escape.
The actors are on every talk show. Commercials are playing non-stop. Posters are everywhere. But, come Fall, we’ve moved on.
Classics styles are like classic movies. The Godfather. Back to the Future. Taxi Driver. They’re not going anywhere.
That’s the advantage of classic styles of clothes. They’re time tested to look good. A leather jacket, dark blue jeans, boots? Looked great in the 1950s, still looks good today.
WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY: Start shifting your shopping habits to look for and buy classic styles. What’s the difference between something that’s classic and trendy? How do you balance classics and trends in your wardrobe? Check out this post I wrote that answers that question.
7. STAY CLEAR OF GRAPHICS, LOGOS, AND WILD PRINTS (FOR NOW)
Many Essential Man readers are older professionals (30+), and I often get asked “How can I look older/more mature/get taken more seriously?”
One of the ways is to stay clear of graphics, logos, and wild prints on any kind of clothing, whether it’s a t-shirt, sweater, or god forbid, pants.
Whenever you wear a logo or graphic t-shirt, you either look like you’re in college, or are you’re on your way to a UFC fight. (Don’t get me wrong, I’m a HUGE MMA fan. But there is a certain style that goes with it.)
I’m not opposed to logos and graphic t-shirts as part of a solid wardrobe, but when you’re starting out, going solid colors is going to make you look 10x more mature and serious.
WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY: Solid colors and graphic/logo-less clothes make you look more refined and mature. The great thing is that this change is a simple swap. Replace your graphic t-shirts and clothes with solid versions, like with the examples above.
8. STICK TO SOLID NEUTRAL COLORS
Great examples of outfits using neutral colors
Every man’s wardrobe should be based around neutral colors.
What are neutral colors?
They’re colors that aren’t overpowering. Because they’re not overpowering they easily mix with each other. Powerful colors like a neon green and orange? Pretty hard to work with.
If your wardrobe is all neutral colors, you don’t need to know “how to mix and match colors”. A neutral color wardrobe is essentially self-working!
Here’s the other thing: You’ve probably already been dressing in mostly neutral colors without even knowing it.
Neutral colors are white, black, navy, olive, grey, khaki, brown
Standard neutral color palette
What I love about neutral colors, aside from it being self working, is that it’s a very masculine color palette. It makes you look refined, serious, and put together. It also provides the perfect backdrop when you want to start introducing more color to your wardrobe.
WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY: I recommend a ratio of 3:1 when it comes to solid neutrals and non-neutral colors. Take 10 minutes check your closet. Do you have more non-neutrals, graphics and pattern clothes than solid neutrals? Make a note to start balancing it out to hit a 3:1 ratio.
9. TO QUICKLY UNDERSTAND QUALITY, GET HANDS ON
Why are some cashmere sweaters $100, and other $1,500? Is the $1,500 one really 15x better?
Are higher quality clothes “worth it”?
No doubt these questions have crossed your mind. And my answer is…
It’s hard to make anything good for a low price. Whether that’s a pair of jeans, a laptop, or a steak dinner at home. When you have a limited budget to work with, there has to be some compromises.
There’s an assumption that because higher quality or designer clothes are expensive, “you’re getting ripped off” as a customer. You’ll sometimes read guys on blogs and forums proclaim you’re just “paying for the marketing costs”
I can tell you having worked 11 years as a menswear designer, it’s just not really true.
Better materials, better construction, and better design cost more to make, so it costs more for you to buy.
A perfect example: Cheap jacket zippers can be low as $0.50 a zipper. They’re light, can be frustrating to use and, of course, break easily.
A leather jacket I designed using a high quality RiRi Zipper
When I was making leather jackets, I was using high end RiRi zippers. They’re heftier and nearly impossible to break. When you zip up your jacket, it was buttery smooth.
The downside? They can sometimes cost as much as $20 per zipper for me as a designer. That means by the time the jacket hits you in the stores, that single $20 zipper adds $60 to the price of the jacket thanks to a standard 3x markup.
That’s not marketing, that’s math.
But it’s hard for you to grasp how much better that zipper or $1,500 cashmere sweater is without trying it. The same way I can tell you one of the best meals I’ve ever had cost $220, per person, no matter how well I describe it, you can’t truly understand until you take a bite.
WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY: Go to a store that you would consider out of your budget. A place that might even be uncomfortably expensive for you. You don’t have to buy anything. Just walk around, touch the clothes. Maybe even try something on. Make mental note of how things fit, feel, and how you feel wearing it. Then go to a fast fashion shop like Zara or H&M and try similar items on. Make note of what’s different and what’s similar. Anything surprising?
10. BUY THE BEST QUALITY YOU CAN FOR YOUR BUDGET
This leads us to the question, how much should you spend on clothes?
Simple: My recommendation to all my clients is to buy the best quality that fits in their budget.
If you’re making mid 6-figures a year, then a $200 pair of jeans might not be a big deal. But if $200 is barely what you make a day, there are plenty of great options at lower prices.
WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY: To start, I always recommend J.Crew. They’re in almost every major city, are classic with a touch of trend, and they have solid prices. For more store recommendations, check out my post “Where I personally shop (and what I get there)”
11. SAVE TIME IN THE DRESSING ROOM USING THE “PULL 3” TRICK
Whenever I’m out shopping, I always see people pulling one size, then going back and forth from the showroom to the dressing room.
It drives me crazy! It’s such a waste of time.
Imagine cooking a meal at home where you took out one ingredient at a time from the fridge.
I’m going to show you how to cut your shopping time in half with one trick.
When you’re pulling clothes to try on in the dressing room, “Pull 3” of the same item:
- One in the size you think you are
- One size up
- One size down
So if you’re shopping for jeans and you think you’re a 33, pull a 32 and a 34 and take all three to the dressing room. It saves you a couple trips, and is a bit of insurance in case it’s a new cut or the brand changed their sizing.
WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY: Use the “Pull 3” trick when you’re out shopping
12. USE “THE SWAP TRICK” TO GRADUALLY STEP OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE
White pants can be intimidating, but looks great when done right. LEFT TO RIGHT: PICS VIA TOMMY TON, GQ, SARTORIALIST
There’s no change without stepping outside of your comfort zone.
But it doesn’t have to be terrifying.
I teach my clients what I call “The Swap Trick”. It’s a way of introducing something into your wardrobe – a new trendy piece, a new color they thought they could never wear, or an item of clothing they never considered before – gradually.
Here’s how it works.
Think of it like trying out hot sauces. You wouldn’t go from a mild hotsauce straight to a super hot ghost pepper sauce. You would try something slightly hotter than the last and work your way up.
It’s the same thing when you’re trying something new with your style. You probably don’t want to jump from a black leather jacket to a neon green one. The next step up would probably be a brown leather jacket.
Here’s another example:
You want to start wearing more colors and patterns for summer.
I’ll start with an easy outfit: linen oxford shirt, navy lounge pants, sunglasses, white sneakers. The color palette,while perfectly fine, feels a little boring and safe. So let’s swap out the shirt for something a little more colorful. We can go two ways, a brighter color, or a pattern/print.
Even though the choice of a light blue shirt isn’t so crazy, you can already see it feels a lot more colorful than the outfit we started with. With the print, it’s even better and more in the spirit of summer.
But notice how one simple swap can change the entire mood of the outfit! This is really the key to starting to wear more color. You don’t have to wear a lot to brighten up your look.
As a starting recommendation, I always advise to start with just one swap per phase. When you get more comfortable with wearing some color and patterns, take it a step further.
Each time, swap out one more item in your look for something a bit brighter and colorful. The great thing is, if you feel like you went overboard, you can always pull it back a level or two and still have a great outfit.
WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY: Think about something you wanted to add to your style that you’re nervous about. How could you break it down and gradually introduce it into your wardrobe using “The Swap Trick”? If you need a specific example on how to use The Swap Trick for something like trends, check out this post I wrote on Effortless Gent.
13. YOU DON’T START WITH CONFIDENCE, YOU BUILD IT
Think about when you first started learning how to drive a car.
You were probably terrified.
You were pretty sure within the first 10 seconds of hitting the road, you were going to crash.
You weren’t confident. Yet, as you kept driving, your confidence grew. Driving got easier. Now you illegally Snapchat on your phone while sipping your coffee and playing with the radio as you steer with your knee, and still get work in one piece.
It’s the same with your style.
You don’t need to start with confidence to improve your style. Your confidence grows as you work to improve your style.
Just like with driving, the more you do it, the easier it gets.
WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY: Start with one outfit. Just one. Use the advice in the previous tips – stick with neutral colored, classic styles that fit well. You’re going to look and feel great. That quick win is important. Now use that feeling to keep going. Then, read the next tip to learn my favorite trick to help you build confidence even faster.
14. USE MY FAVORITE TECHNIQUE TO FEEL MORE CONFIDENT IN A NEW OUTFIT
This is a great technique to use in conjunction with The Swap Trick, and is a KILLER hack for a first date. In fact, it’s something I used when I first started dating my current girlfriend.
Whenever you have a date (or a conference, interview, or speaking event): Wear the outfit you’re going to wear to date for an entire day before the date.
Even if it’s a dressy outfit. Go about your day like it’s any other day. Get coffee. Go grocery shopping. Go to work.
What you’re essentially doing is “breaking in” the outfit. Getting yourself used to wearing it.
I started doing this because I noticed that when I would dress up for a date, even if it’s clothes I’ve had for years, I would always feel uncomfortable during the date. I’d feel self-conscious. I’d fidget a lot.
Then one day I had schedule a date right after work, since I had no time to go home and change, I wore my date outfit to work. By the time the date rolled around, I had spent an entire day in my date outfit and felt relaxed.
WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY: Whether it’s a new jacket you got or an entire outfit for a date, break it in by wearing it around to do errands. Got a last minute date or event and can’t spare an entire day? I’ve found even wearing the outfit for a few hours before helps.
Need some date outfit ideas? Check out this post: “A beautiful woman lets you know how to dress (and what to do) on a first date”
15. SEEK THE HELP AND ADVICE OF EXPERTS
According to Mint, I spent $7,360 last year on books, courses, and consultants to help me improve my business, my skills like writing, and general knowledge in topics I’m interested in like philosophy.
It sounds like a lot, but ask yourself this question: What’s the cost of bad advice?
Imagine you’re a CEO of a company and you have a marketing budget of $25k. You read some advice from marketing forums filled with anonymous writers. You decide to take some of the advice and it turns out to be bad. Now you’re out $25k. Suddenly, a $7k investment in an top expert seems like a steal.
How many months, even years, will you waste following bad advice when it comes to your fitness routine? Your finances? Your style?
This tweet from Amy Hoy sums it up perfectly:
When it comes to learning how to dress, there are TONS of options. From style blogs, Instagrams, Reddit, and Youtube channels.
Some dish out great advice. Most are filled with guys who like to shop and like to talk about it online.
When it comes to style advice, it can be tricky to filter out the good from the bad.
As someone that’s been doing this for over 11 years, I know how style advice can be challenging to teach. Telling someone what to buy isn’t the same as teaching them how to have great style. The same way a cook telling you to buy ingredients doesn’t help you learn the technique.
WHAT YOU CAN DO TODAY: Whenever you read advice online, always consider the source. Do they dress well? More important, is it a style you want to adopt? If they are a stylist or have products, how do their clients and readers look? Good, or terrible? Do they have a background in fashion or style, or are they “a regular guy just like you!”
Once you find an expert you’ve vetted. You have two options:
- Pay for their advice
This is the fastest way to learn. Whether that’s a book they’ve written, a course they’ve created, or hiring them for one-on-one time. And while this is the fastest, this is also the more costly option. This is my personal preferred way to learn because my time is limited. I can always make money back, but one thing I can’t make back is my time.
- Reach out to them via e-mail for advice
On the flip side, this option is “free”, but is going to take more time on your end. Before you reach out to an expert for advice, make sure you do your homework. Experts are often busy people. Make sure you search if they answered the questions you want to ask before. Skim through their blogs, Twitter, check if they’ve been interviewed on a podcast or magazine. If you can’t find the answer you’re looking for, only then should you consider reaching out to them. For that, I highly recommend reading this post: “How to get the attention of your favorite expert”
16. LEARN TO TAKE IT SERIOUSLY ENOUGH NOT TO TAKE IT TOO SERIOUSLY (AKA HAVE FUN, IT’S JUST CLOTHES)
I have a confession to make: I don’t read fashion blogs.
Sure, I skim sites like Hypebeast and Gear Patrol to see what’s new, but when it comes to blogs, forums, news about the industry, I stay clear. Why?
Well, for one thing, a lot of it’s really boring. It also doesn’t help me with my job.
I do a lot of research when it comes to learning the pains men have when it comes to their style. I often come across forums where guys are endlessly debating selvedge denim vs non-selvedge, having long discussions about the “death of original style”, and share their theories on what “DESIGNER X” was trying to say with his latest collection.
One thing I realized after I went from designing menswear to becoming a private personal stylist: I’ve learned to take it seriously enough not to take it too seriously.
Yes, great style can truly impact your life. I’ve seen it first hand.
Awesome email from a client
Better style can make you get taken more seriously in your job. It can make you an unforgettable brand. And yes! It will make you more attractive! (What woman doesn’t want a well dressed, successful man?)
But the last thing I want you to do is spend hours on forums debating about clothes. I’d rather you put on an amazing new outfit (you learned thanks to me, of course), go out and live your life. Crush it at your job. Go on an amazing date.
Because if you aren’t having fun dressing better, it’s not going to last very long.
HAVING AMAZING STYLE IS EASIER THAN YOU THINK
To sum it up, make sure you:
- Buy clothes that fit – It will solve 90% of your style problems
- Focus on the classics first – classics are classics for a reason. They’re time tested essentials that look good on every guy.
- Stick to a neutral color palette – Neutrals automatically mix with each other, so you don’t have to worry about mixing colors. They make you look professional and masculine, and when you’re ready to introduce more color into your wardrobe, they serve as the perfect backdrop
- Have fun
Want to kickstart your new style in the next 10 mins?
Download my “How Clothes Should Fit You” Cheatsheets. You’ll learn “clothing fit” hacks that’ll help you find clothes that fit, cut your shopping time in half, and make you look really fucking good – even if you have a “weird” body type
You can learn these simple tricks in 10 minutes. And best of all, it’s free! Just enter your info below and I’ll send it to you.
Success! Check your email for your bonus!
45 Ultimate Tips For Men. Number 40 Will Help You Go Far In Life.
1. Go for women you perceive to be “out of your league.” You’ll surprise yourself.
2. Never have sex with anyone that doesn’t want it as much as you.
3. Never hit anyone unless they are an immediate threat.
4. Every hat should serve a purpose.
5. Never take her to the movies on the first date.
6. Learn to wet shave.
7. Nothing looks more badass than a well-tailored suit.
8. Shave with the grain on the first go-around.
9. Always look a person in the eye when you talk to them.
10. Buy a plunger before you need a plunger.
11. Exercise makes you happy. Run, lift, and play sports.
12. Brush your teeth before you put on your tie.
13. A small amount of your paycheck should go directly to your savings account every month.
14. Call your parents every week.
15. Never wear a clip-on tie.
16. Give a firm handshake.
17. Compliment her shoes.
18. Never leave a pint unfinished.
19. If you aren’t confident, fake it. It will come.
20. You can tell the size of a man by the size of things that bother him.
21. Be conscious of your body language.
22. The only reason to ever point a gun at someone is if you intend to shoot them.
23. Always stand to shake someone’s hand.
24. Never lend anything you can’t afford to lose.
25. Ask more than you answer. Everybody likes to talk about themselves.
26. Keep a change of clothes at the office.
27. Buy high quality tools, so you only have to buy them once.
28. Manliness is not only being able to take care of yourself, but others as well.
29. Go with the decision that will make for a good story.
30. When you walk, look straight ahead, not at your feet.
31. Nice guys don’t finish last. Boring guys do.
32. Find your passion and figure out how to get paid for it.
33. Don’t let the little head do the thinking for the big head.
34. No matter their job or status in life, everyone deserves your respect.
35. The most important thing you can learn is personal responsibility. Bad things happen, it’s your job to overcome them.
36. The first one to get angry loses.
37. Do what needs to be done without complaining. It won’t help speed things up.
38. Never stop learning.
39. Always go out into public dressed like you’re about to meet the love of your life.
40. Don’t change yourself just to make someone happy, unless that someone is you.
41. If you’re the smartest person in the room, you’re in the wrong room.
42. Luck favors the prepared.
43. Women find confidence sexy as hell.
44. Do whatever you want to do in the life, but be the best at it.
45. No one is on their deathbed wishing they spent more time at work. Enjoy your life.
Dating tips for men
Dating can be a scary prospect, especially for men. If you’re a single guy seeking someone special, don’t be put off: with these simple tips you could find love in no time
Modern dating is far less rule-based than it used to be. Fifty years ago, it was expected that the man would make the first move, pick up the bill, and generally be in the driving seat. Today, dating rules for men are far more relaxed – but that doesn’t mean men don’t still feel the pressure.
It’s common for guys to struggle with flirting, dating and relationships – in part because they can find it hard to ask for advice and speak openly about these things with friends.
If you’re yet to find your special someone, read on for this list of favourite fool-proof dating tips for men.
1. Put yourself out there
Meeting someone special becomes virtually impossible if you don’t put yourself out there.
Perhaps you’ve had your heart broken in the past or you struggle with shyness – whatever the reason for your hesitation, it’s important to get past your nerves and make a commitment to meeting new people.
By its very nature, dating is a little bit nerve-racking and risky. It requires you to be vulnerable and open to new experiences. But rather than running a mile from it all, try to embrace it. Remember that any dates you do meet up with will be in exactly the same boat.
2. Meet people online
and in real life
If you’re from an older generation, you’re probably more inclined to meet people in person rather than wade into the unknown world of dating apps. But if you’re younger, the thought of striking up conversation with a stranger in person might be downright terrifying.
In truth, the best way to meet someone is to try a combination of the two. Sign up to some online dating services, and at the same time make an effort to be sociable and meet people in real life. If talking to strangers at a bar isn’t your thing, try taking up a new activity such as an exercise class or a book club.
Imagine you’re chatting with a friend or family member – this takes the pressure off
Online apps can become a crutch for people who struggle with social interactions so try not to rely on them too heavily – you need to practise feeling comfortable around people in real life. It does get easier the more you do it.
3. Don’t overthink your flirting technique
Flirting is not always easy, but in most cases it fails when you overthink it, or try “pick-up artist” cheats or tricks to impress someone, rather than relying on your natural charms.
A good tip when talking to someone new (whether online or in person) is to imagine you’re chatting with a friend or family member – this takes the pressure off, letting you relax and be yourself.
When meeting people in real life, make the effort to make good eye contact and smile. Listen carefully when they speak, and engage with their stories by offering similar anecdotes. It’s OK to be tactile when flirting, but don’t overdo it – a light touch on the shoulder or hand now and again is fine, but more than that might make them uncomfortable.
Finally, remember the golden rule: if they tell you they’re not interested, or politely take themselves out of the conversation, don’t keep pursuing them.
4. Plan date venues where you’ll be in your element
The typical first-date venue is a chic bar or an expensive restaurant but, while there’s nothing wrong with either of these, they’re not always conducive to having a good time.
If you meet your date in a noisy, busy bar, you might struggle to find seats or even hear the other person speaking. Expensive restaurants, meanwhile, can make you feel pressured and uncomfortable.
Instead of going for something “impressive”, opt for a place you know well – whether it’s that Victorian pub near your home or your favourite independent pizzeria. Also, remember that you can try something a bit different. Don’t be afraid to suggest a day date such as a picnic in the park or a stroll around an art gallery.
If it’s in a venue where you’ll be in your element, the date will automatically go more smoothly.
5. Make a good impression on your first date
It may seem obvious, but on an initial date first impressions are crucial. The first and easiest step in making a good impression is to look your best; so before you head out, take some time perfecting your appearance.
Have a shower, spend a bit of time on your hair and make sure you wear something clean (and preferably freshly ironed). There’s no specific rule when it comes to first-date outfits, but it’s hard to go wrong with a fresh white shirt, dark jumper, and smart jeans or trousers. Trainers are A-OK as long as they’re fairly box-fresh.
Other than your appearance, making a good first impression is about being relaxed, confident and friendly. Confidence isn’t always easy to muster – so if you’re struggling, fake it ’til you make it!
6. Ask lots of questions
A favourite first-date tip for men is to ask lots of questions. This is particularly good advice if you struggle with shyness.
Just remember not to delve too deep too soon – keep the conversation light and easy by focusing on work, hobbies and travel plans. If they bring up deeper topics, then great – but early on in your relationship, oversharing or being too nosy about someone’s private life can be a turn-off and seem too intrusive.
Even more important, make sure you listen to your date’s answers, and ask lots of follow-up questions. Make a mental note of significant details (for example, the name of their dog or their favourite food), and mention these things later on to show them you’re interested.
Lastly, make sure you talk and open up about yourself as well. You don’t want them to leave the date not knowing a single thing about you.
7. Avoid checking your phone
It’s common in this day and age to be overly reliant on your phone, but on a date, constantly scrolling and reading messages is a huge no-no. Not only can a phone become a crutch that leaves you less well equipped to deal with social situations, using one on a date also indicates to the other person that they don’t have your full attention.
When you’re with your date, turn your phone onto silent and put it away
When you’re with your date, turn your phone onto silent and put it away. Leaving it on the table – even if it’s flipped over – means it’s still within easy reach.
8. Don’t come on too strong
It can be tricky to strike the perfect balance on a first date. You want to come across as confident but not arrogant, interested but not nosy, and polite but not old-fashioned. The same balance needs to be struck when it comes to showing romantic interest in your date.
Even if you’re already hearing wedding bells, you shouldn’t be too forward or assume that your date feels the same. Don’t be afraid to give a few compliments and tell them you’ve had a great time – but don’t expect too much. If you want to see them again, ask for a second date, but don’t be pushy if they seem hesitant or simply say no.
The old advice regarding playing hard to get isn’t a relationship rule to live by, but there’s certainly a benefit to holding some of your feelings back until you’ve got to know a person better.
9. Debrief with friends
One of the best things to do post-date is to talk it over with one or two trusted friends – whether or not it went well, and so on. Generally a pal who’s in a committed and happy long-term relationship is more likely to be helpful than one who’s into serial one-night stands.
If the date went well, you can talk to your friends about how to proceed – and get their advice on how to craft that perfect follow-up text. And if the date went badly? They’ll be guaranteed to cheer you up.
10. Find love with Telegraph Dating
If we’ve inspired you to get out there and meet someone special, don’t forget you can kick-start your search with Telegraph Dating. Our sophisticated two-way matching system will pair you with people who fit your personality and interests to a T.
If you’re single and interested in meeting like-minded people, join Telegraph Dating. With more than 220,000 like-minded single people, Telegraph Dating is the best place to find romance.
45 Life Tips Every Man Needs To Know
Of course you don’t need to be told how to be a man. But just in case, here’s a list of the most manly words of wisdom you will ever need:
#1. Buy high quality tools, so you only have to buy them once.
#2. Keep a change of clothes at the office.
#3. Never hit anyone unless they are an immediate threat.
#4. Every hat should serve a purpose.
#5. Never take her to the movies on the first date.
#6. Learn to wet shave.
#7. Nothing looks more badass than a well-tailored suit.
#8. Shave with the grain on the first go-around.
#9. Always look a person in the eye when you talk to them.
#10. Buy a plunger before you need a plunger.
#11. Exercise makes you happy. Run, lift, and play sports.
#12. Brush your teeth before you put on your tie.
#13. A small amount of your paycheck should go directly to your savings account every month.
#14. Call Mom and Dad every week.
#15. Never wear a clip-on tie.
#16. Give a firm handshake.
#17. Compliment her shoes.
#18. Never leave a pint unfinished.
#19. The first one to get angry loses.
#20. If you aren’t confident, fake it. It will come around.
#21. You can tell the size of a man by the size of things that bother him.
#22. Be conscious of your body language.
#23. The only reason to ever point a gun at someone is if you intend to shoot them. Period.
#24. Always stand to shake someone’s hand.
#25. Never lend anything you can’t afford to lose.
#26. Ask more than you answer. Everybody likes to talk about themselves.
#27. Never have sex with anyone that doesn’t want it as much as you.
#28. Go for women out of your league. You may end up surprised.
#29. Manliness is not only being able to take care of yourself, but others as well.
#30. Go with the decision that will make for a good story.
#31. When you walk, look straight ahead, not at your feet.
#32. Nice guys don’t finish last, boring guys do.
#33. Find your passion and figure out how to get paid for it.
#34. Don’t let the little head do the thinking for the big head.
#35. No matter their job or status, everyone deserves your respect.
#36. The most important thing you can learn is personal responsibility. Bad things happen; it’s your job to overcome them.
#37. A man does what needs to be done without complaining.
#38. Never stop learning.
#39. Always go out into public dressed like you’re about to meet the love of your life.
#40. Don’t change yourself just to make someone happy.
#41. If you’re the smartest person in the room, you’re in the wrong room.
#42. Luck favors the prepared.
#43. Women find confidence sexy as hell.
#44. Do whatever you want to do, but be the best at it.
#45. No one is on their deathbed wishing they spent more time at work.
source (all tips via johnnywebber)
90,000 38 tips for men about women
Family relationships can help a businessman or make his work wildly ineffective. What a job when there are problems at home. I am writing these tips for a male guru workshop. Women need not read, it will not be interesting. Or read and show to husbands.
The main advice to men about their woman – you must love very much and not try to understand !
A woman needs many and different manifestations of love in large quantities.What a man thinks – he gave me a car and I’m done. For a woman, both a car and a bunch of her favorite flowers are +1 point in a man’s piggy bank. Therefore, more different signs of love!
Love signs man for woman:
1. Hug from work!
2. When she tells and complains about a problem, do not immediately respond with a solution – “Yes, you do it.” Listen to your task. In this case, you can ask: “Can I help you with something?”
3. 20 minutes once a day, concentrate on your wife and she will understand – listens, it means she loves!
4.Give flowers for no reason! ❤
5. Plan your weekend without waiting until Friday. And even more so on Sundays!
6. Girlfriends are needed to drain the chatter and their experiences. Otherwise, the woman will do it in you.
7. Sometimes you can help your wife with her household chores. But you can’t do it all the time!
8. A man cannot be at home more than 4 hours a day.
9. It is necessary to make compliments: “you are beautiful, clever!” and what there are enough ideas for.
At the same time, your woman is categorically forbidden to communicate with people who do not like her and do not say compliments.
10. Respect her feelings when angry or upset. Since this has happened, then it is important!
11. Plan to always be late for a woman – an hour or an hour and a half. Getting together is a problem for them.
12. If you are late from work or meeting with friends – call and warn. For her, this is a manifestation of love. ❤
13. If the wife asks for help, you can agree or refuse. But do not blame for asking for this help! Even if this is some kind of stupidity, in your opinion.
14. If your wife’s feelings are hurt, you need to show sympathy. Don’t: give advice or say “don’t pay attention”. This is important for her, although for you it may be some kind of nonsense.
15. If you need to be alone, you must tell your wife about it, warn!
And apologize when you return. But without describing the problems and incidents. She does not need to tell the man’s problems – she has enough of her experiences.
16. If you have solved the problem – tell me, the problem has been solved! But no details.Because – a woman has enough of her experiences, she will find out, she will also begin to worry about a solved problem.
17. Fireplace – burn!
18. It is necessary to listen to a woman without being distracted by the phone or TV.
19. Always thank for food! You can offer to wash the dishes. Don’t just wash it like that.
20. Notice when the wife is upset or tired. In this case, you can and should help.
21. Leaving home – ask what to buy.
22. Warn me if you go somewhere or even go to sleep.She is happy to be reckoned with.
23. Call from work, talk to your wife, find out how she is there.
She is ecstatic from the attention! You can even set to remind you to call your wife .
24. All the time you say that you love what you did for your wife and what I will do for her in the future!
25. You can offer to make / unroll the bed once. But don’t do women’s business!
26. If you left – leave your phone number, address. And warn you that you have arrived.
27. Wash her car and do everything about his wife’s car. She will be happy!
28. Carry your wife in a washed car!
29. You can ask her recommendations on how to dress.
30. Take the side of your wife if she is out of balance. And the side of the child, even if they are to blame.
31. The prelude to sex is more important than the process itself!
32. Pay attention to your wife in public. And not all attention to friends, and the wife sits on the sidelines and is sad.And you can’t criticize her in public.
33. Your hand, which you hold it, should be toned, strong, courageous. Not a sluggish rag!
34. Buy what she loves. Not what you think for her, but exactly what your woman loves.
35. Choose the restaurant yourself, it’s hard for her to make a choice. Maximum – you can offer her a couple to choose from.
36. In a family, give priority to the attention of the wife over the children.
37. Give small gifts to your wife.But the ones she loves, not what you like.
38. Protect her from imaginary dangers that she has invented for herself. Invented dragons hurt the same way.
This concludes the advice to men about relationships with women. But you can add yours in the comments and be sure to repost if you liked it.
Founder of the Club of Directors and the Smopro Agency.SMM evangelist, 16 years of experience. Technology developer Suitable SMM. Clients: Putin’s Headquarters, Pepsi, SAP, SKOLKOVO Business School, BORK, MTT, Bitrix 24, Aviasales, Diva, STENDERS, Real Trans Hair, CINEMA PARK, INCANTO, Petrovich.
How a man can please a woman – Rossiyskaya Gazeta
The scandal with Harvey Weinstein, in addition to sympathy for his victims, posed a question for the men and women who remained outside of him: what broke in the eternal “living mechanics” of ordinary and unusual courtship, that everything becomes criminally exaggerated? Advice on how to please a woman without imitating Harvey Weinstein and without resorting to violent harassment is given to readers (men in the first place) by a well-known psychologist, Ph.D. Olga Makhovskaya.
1 The first piece of advice is that a man should comfort and calm a woman. And all the time. This is the classic of the courtship genre. This “trick” is extremely important because a woman is weak and anxious, she needs comfort. Meanwhile, the phrase from the category of consolations “Everything will be fine, baby, do not worry” today can be heard very rarely.
2 The second thing to do with a woman constantly is to praise her. And this, too, is not unfounded, if only because all the achievements of a woman are much more expensive for her than for a man.She, unlike a man, in order to achieve something, all the time needs to pull up on tiptoe.
The first and second “tricks” from the arsenal of “father” behavior. Psychologists usually give such advice to dads, explaining how to behave with their daughters. But this also applies to adult women, because in one way or another, a woman transfers the “fatherly” role to a man. And a man should turn it on from time to time. She, of course, should not be the only one, so that everything does not turn into total tutelage, but nevertheless. When a woman is comforted and praised, she perceives this as warmth, kindness, and care…
3 The third technique for a man who wants to please is the ultimate admiration for a woman. At the same time, you will be very commonplace if you just tell her that she is beautiful. It’s like saying nothing. At best, you will be enlisted in the army of fans. At the same time, one must master the “high art” of admiration and be sure to show a woman that she is special. One must be able to notice details, particulars. See the same curl of hair on Anna Karenina’s neck. You can praise the intonation of the voice, smile, profile, with admiration to meet some gesture.And moreover, so that she thought: “Yes? I never paid attention to this …” Some feature must be noted without fail. It doesn’t cost a man a lot of verbal effort, he just needs to be observant. Besides, I think that men just react to details, although they don’t really admit it. We women never really know how men perceive us. Of course, a woman feels whether she likes her or not. And this always interests her. But men hide why they are really “dragging along”.For simplicity, we sometimes think that they react to a cleavage or bare navel, but we never know for sure.
4 A man will become special for a woman himself if he promises to fulfill her desire. From “Anything you want” to “What do you want?” There is such a maxim, in any case, American psychologists are convincing in it that a woman will go to the ends of the world for a man who promises – not even fulfills, but promises – to fulfill at least some cherished, important desire of a woman.
I think that in the story of Harvey Weinstein, which we see from an exaggeratedly rude side, this also worked. He promised the actresses to film them in some very important role for them.
But the trick is that when you have already been removed, although you are not God only knows what actress, in some “Shakespeare in Love” and began to shoot further, the desire when it is performed loses its charm and is depreciated. And not everyone is ready to go through life with gratitude for a fulfilled desire. A hungry person eats with appetite, but when he is full, he can say: well, this is not so delicious…
I don’t think Weinstein is a terrible exception, for producers with actresses this is more of a typical case. As with the directors.
Will this all disappear after the Weinstein scandal? Unlikely. So for now, it is important that the directors at least not tell in their memoirs that they slept with the actress, without thinking about how they go down.
5 And the last piece of advice – a man should feed a woman. Asking if she is hungry, suggesting, insisting on eating together.And it is no coincidence that this is included in the ritual of the gallant gentleman, who must take the lady to the restaurant. This is also a manifestation of concern. A man can give a woman as many signals that he likes her, but if he never takes care of her … And if a man does not feed you, then for a woman this is a sure signal that he is not ready for you take care and take you under my wing.
By the way
Visible role model
I recently watched “Come to See Me” with the adorable and incredibly dignified Irina Kupchenko, and I thought: “Damn it, how does Yankovsky look at her!” This, in fact, is how a man should look at a woman.
Who is Harvey Weinstein?
Harvey Weinstein, a seemingly unremarkable, moderately well-fed, middle-aged man, was involved in a series of sex scandals. Before that, they talked about him only with respect. And the truth – it was for what. Weinstein created an entire empire – the Miramax film company, which put the production of high-quality films practically on stream, and the actresses who appeared in his films woke up famous overnight.300 nominations for “Oscar” and tapes that the whole world watched with pleasure – “Pulp Fiction”, “Chicago”, “The Talented Mr. Ripley”, “Shakespeare in Love”.
But on October 5, Harvey’s fortune turned away: The New York Times published a large investigation – the most influential producer in Hollywood harassed almost all the actresses he starred in his films. It all started with Ashley Judd, who was invited by the producer to the hotel, as she first thought, for a business breakfast. But it was not so: Harvey called her upstairs, went out to her in one robe and asked to give him a massage.
Harvey’s relationship with Mira Sorvino earned her the lead role in The Great Aphrodite alongside Woody Allen himself, as well as Golden Globes and Oscars. But as soon as the connection with Weinstein faded away, the career of the actress also began to slowly but surely slide off the top.
The list of Harvey Weinstein’s “victims” is growing every day: today there are already fifty of them. Harvey himself partially admitted his sin. Photo: AP
Jessica Alba, unlike several of Harvey’s hobbies, after breaking up with him was able to take place as an actress.Although it was Weinstein’s film “Sin City” that gave it a start. Following The New York Times, Harvey dug in his dirty laundry for the Los Angeles Times.
Angelina Jolie, who did not go into the details of the incident, and Gwyneth Paltrow, whom Brad Pitt, whom she met, allegedly stood up for, was accused of harassment. Almost all of Hollywood took up arms against Harvey, he was kicked out of his own company, the lawyer refused to defend him, he was expelled from the ranks of the Film Academy, his wife left him, he was stripped of almost all honorary titles.At one time, Harvey claimed that his brother Bob invented all this, with whom they formed a film company in order to become the sole owner of everything.
While a case against Harvey is being brought up in court, he partially admits his guilt, is treated by a psychotherapist and promises to shoot a new film masterpiece.
Prepared by Natalya Sokolova
7 pieces of advice for men who have lost faith in themselves
Alpina Publisher has published the book “A man in isolation. Games, Porn and Identity Loss ”by Philip Zimbardo and Nikita Colombe.It sets out a rather non-standard point of view on modern men.
Against the background of the craze for feminism, the stronger sex, according to the authors, is increasingly becoming a victim of sexism.
The image of a modern man
How do you see a man? According to the traditional expectations of society, this is a strong man, a breadwinner, an invader, a male. But in the courtyard of the XXI century, the conditions of life have changed, and a real man cannot correspond to such an idealized image.
Therefore, he tries to escape from everyday life: he fills his time with pornography, computer games and food.Loses self-confidence, is afraid of women and becomes isolated in his problems.
Zimbardo and Colombe create another image of a man, which is the complete opposite of the traditional ideal. Of course, the portrait comes out unsightly.
Not every man has all of these problems. But the book serves as a reminder of the negative trends that we can increasingly observe in modern life.
How to stop running away from real life
The book “A man in isolation.Games, Porn and Loss of Identity ”is divided into three large parts: analysis of negative trends in society, search for their causes and specific solutions. The last part is the most interesting, because there you can find atypical recommendations on how to achieve balance in relations between men and women.
The authors see the way out in changing the education system (for example, they propose to increase the number of male teachers), the diet, and the upbringing of boys in childhood.
But all this is possible only in the long term.Therefore, we have chosen tips with the help of which any man can independently change his life. After all, when it comes to change, everything depends only on ourselves.
1. Turn off porn
Visual stimulators are now available, categorized and catering to men’s fantasies. But porn does not saturate, but it takes away the ability to feel pleasure.
After giving up pornography, gradually your dopamine receptors will return to normal, the sensitive circuit will recover, and you can get rid of the addiction to instant pleasure.
Remember that there is no quick fix or magic pill to get rid of addiction. Redirect sexual energy somewhere above the waist – to the heart and a sober head.
2. Do something more useful
To be a gamer today, you need not only to improve your skills, but also to be a physically tough person. To get closer to the top of the rating in the game, you need to play all day long without sleep and rest breaks.
Girls are also addicted to games, but they do not play as intensely as boys: the ratio is 5 hours versus 13 hours a week.Try to use at least some of the time you spend on games to achieve your goals in real life.
People in socially disadvantaged conditions are most susceptible to gambling addiction. If you are playing alone, try to find a friend in the real world – most likely, the problem is not your addiction to games, but a lack of communication. So you replace real friendship with conversations with unfamiliar players on the web.
Maybe the games were originally created to inspire people to build a better reality, but today they just replace it with themselves.
3. Go in for sports
Another global problem of the 21st century is obesity. This is partly due to the fact that young people are less interested in physical activity and more in their computer screens. The habit of a sedentary lifestyle passes with them into adulthood.
In addition to the health benefits of physical activity, there are several other reasons to go in for sports:
- A man who has achieved good physical shape gains recognition from other people and no longer needs to prove his masculinity;
- individual sports develop psychological stability and responsibility;
- team sports teach flexibility and teamwork;
- Sport develops the ability to achieve other goals in life.
Choose loads that are of particular interest to you. No need to pull iron in the machine. You can dance if you want.
An important part of sports is social interaction. Therefore, if you are satisfied with your body, and your soul does not lie for physical education, build social connections in other areas: take up singing, drawing, playing a musical instrument.
Perhaps physical exercise will not make you a professional athlete, but it will be easier for you to be given any task that you consider important.
4. Make a bed: small victories lead to big ones
Making a bed seems like such a small thing, but any small thing can have significant consequences. Starting your day with a small victory over your laziness will give you the strength to do more.
The many small things you do on a regular basis form good habits that keep your life on track. Therefore, collect your thoughts and make a plan for yourself how you will achieve your goals in life.
If you have not succeeded in small things, you will fail in big things.
5. Discover the source of inner strength
In her book The Artist’s Way, American writer and filmmaker Julia Cameron advises everyone to do the morning pages exercise: write three pages about whatever comes to your mind. Exercise will help you understand yourself better and break the habit of judging yourself for every action.
Keeping a diary is useful for various reasons: you give vent to negative experiences, understand your feelings, learn to build short-term and long-term plans.But above all, this is a training for honesty with oneself.
6. Get a woman friend
An important point for shy and shy men who do not know how to communicate with women.
Make friends with at least one woman. Establish friendships and immediately make it clear that you are not counting on anything more. A friend will help you build relationships with the opposite sex, see women not as creatures from Venus, but as interlocutors with interesting views of the world.
7. Find yourself a mentor
You will get the best advice from an older man who has dealt with similar problems. He will help you deal with all your worries so that you can live in peace and choose an occupation to your liking.
e-book paper book
TOP-30 useful tips for men
Ideal and identical people do not exist, both among men and women. Each of us has bad and good habits, positive and negative character traits.All are endowed with unique looks and behaviors. But despite the apparent differences, there are many uniting points that are inherent in almost every person. For example, striving for a happy and long life. Next, let’s highlight the most important and useful life tips for men.
Dream, plan and set goals, and most importantly, act.
Lead a healthy and active lifestyle, that is, get rid of bad habits, eat right and play sports.
Watch less TV and read more books, and not only on self-development or doing business, but also classic literature.
Surround yourself with people who make you happy. Maintain and value relationships with your family. This is the most important thing in life.
Set aside time for daily meditation.
Give your best in a profession or business 110% and learn to invest.
Make important decisions before 11 o’clock in the morning and only in a calm state.
Never stop developing and learning something new.
Try not only to listen carefully, but also to hear. Put the recommendations of successful people into practice.
Actions and deeds performed today determine how your body and mind will be in ten, twenty and thirty years.
Observe the elementary norms of etiquette and style, but do not get hung up on fashion and remain yourself.
Be responsible and solve problems yourself.
Don’t do what you want to hide.
Never think that a woman is too good for you.
Develop confidence and a sense of humor.
Do not forget to compliment, give flowers and take care of your beloved woman.
Always carry cash with you (not necessarily large amounts).
There is nothing wrong with going to the cinema or cafe alone.
Invest in expensive, high quality and beautiful items, including clothing and accessories.
Start your day with exercise and a contrast shower.
Do not offer a girl a “hand and heart” until there is 100% certainty that the answer will be yes.
Learn to cook.
Avoid conflict, but defend your principles wisely and protect loved ones.
Eat broccoli, spinach, avocados, bananas and other vegetables / fruits, even if you don’t like them very much. It is very useful.
Life is an ocean and love is a boat. Love yourself and others.
Focus and do what is important to you and do not be distracted by empty things.
Manage your time wisely. Don’t waste it on things you can’t change. Time is the true luxury of this world.
Appreciate real friends. Help them and ask for help yourself.
Get out of your comfort zone. Without this, personal growth is impossible.
Be kind to people and do not judge anyone.
Life is not a dress rehearsal. There will be no second attempt. Appreciate every moment and enjoy your trip to the fullest.
90,000 5 tips for men who want to understand women • Growth Phase
Although men cannot be from Mars, and women cannot be from Venus, there are fundamental biological differences between the female and male sex.One of them is the way we communicate.
Wrong understanding or interpretation of another person’s words can lead to communication problems, thoughts that “female psychology” is something incomprehensible, so you don’t have to try.
While you can go back to a 2013 study that claims women speak 13,000 more words per day on average, this article is not about science or chemistry.
It’s about how to build trust and strengthen relationships between men and women!
Important tips for a man to understand a woman
Pay attention to her body language
Any communication is 80% non-verbal.It’s easy to embarrass a woman or make her feel uplifted, aroused, or endearing without saying a word.
While she plays with her hair, shrugs, bites her lower lip, you read her gestures and facial expressions.
Does she look like she’s trying to escape by leaning slightly, glancing at her watch and moving her legs? Or leans closer so that you can see the neckline of the blouse and hear languid breathing? These are signs, little secrets, how a man can understand a woman, her desires and mood.
When it comes to communicating on social networks or messengers, you need to behave correctly. Emojis help add accents to your messages, even completely change the tone. The harsh dots at the end of each sentence scare everyone!
Don’t forget about correct grammar and spelling.
A wide, sincere smile can open more doors than meets the eye. When ordering coffee, communicating with a woman at events, on a date or at a chance meeting on the subway, remember that a smile will increase comfort, make communication pleasant, and will be a good investment in future relationships!
Understand, she is the same person as you are
Many men live with the idea of women, whose image has been removed from advertisements, fairy tales and legends.At the same time, not all men try to learn how to interact with the opposite sex and understand girls. It’s like she’s a blonde who doesn’t understand physics, dyes her eyelashes for three hours every day and is scared of spiders to screeching. Or what else is imposed in advertising?
Do not treat girls as slaves or haughty. The types of women are different, each girl is unique and cannot fit the advertising image. Learn to perceive a woman by removing the veil of stereotypes and social attitudes from your eyes.
For quality communication and mutual understanding, try to build a bridge between you and the interlocutor. No division into political parties, race, religion, nationality, hair color, zodiac signs and gender.
We are all human and we are united by something much more important.
You may be interested in:
“We are just friends”: is there a friendship between a man and a woman?
Don’t guess on a camomile! 10 signs that a man is not suitable for a relationship
Why should a woman be happy and not comfortable? Women’s happiness theory
Based on materials: https: // jamesmsama.com / 2017/12/08/5-ways-men-can-communicate-better-with-women /
90,000 5 ways to give advice to a man without hurting his self-esteem
It is a misconception that only women love with their ears. A conversation with a loved one is a delicate matter
Any woman who has been in a relationship for a long time has faced negative reactions from her partner in response to her desire to help him with advice in a given situation.She appeals to him with good intentions, and he rudely breaks off the conversation or takes offense, calling her advice remarks. Do not despair: you can build a trusting dialogue, during which a man will listen to you. You just need to apply the art of diplomacy.
Build phrases referring to yourself
The same thing can be broadcast in completely different ways. The tone of the entire conversation and its result depend on the correct wording.Men themselves admit that they take hostility from what women say only when they convey their message incorrectly. Reproaches that he comes late, chooses the wrong gifts, dresses tasteless or overweight, will not please anyone. Come from the other side. “Darling, I love that shirt of yours so much, you look insanely sexy in it. Maybe you can wear it tomorrow? ” Or: “I want to lose some weight. If you support me, it will be easier to diet ”- the difference is obvious.
Remember that male pride is sacred
A wise woman will never fight for leadership in a family.What for? The man is the head and the woman is the neck. Where the neck turns, the head looks there. The secret to success is to do it unobtrusively, making him feel like he has made the decision. Then he heeds your advice and parting words, because you do not impose your will on him. In a man’s head there should be an awareness of his superiority, he was created this way by nature. And there is no need to try to break these laws and pull the blanket over yourself, nothing good will come of it. Be more subtle in such matters, give him a vector, and he will find the way himself and will also be very pleased with himself.
Do not try to compare it with others
Comparing a man to others is like a red rag to a bull – very dangerous territory. Even if the one with whom you are comparing is his brother or matchmaker. We are all different and in reality, comparing someone with someone is simply ridiculous, incorrect. In a man, advice of this kind completely kills all enthusiasm and desire to change, but only gives rise to aggression against you and the one you set as an example for him. Repeat the rule over and over to yourself: choose your expressions carefully.For example, before giving advice, focus on the merits of a man, cajole him with words, and then carefully add a bit of tar to this barrel of honey. For example: “You have such a texture, such a beautiful growth! If you go to the gym for a month, you will be simply irresistible. ” At the same time, do not forget about non-verbal signals, which are sometimes more convincing than any phrases.
Do not skimp on praise
No matter how much men are mincing, they just love to be praised and complimented.This, by the way, again to their sense of their own exclusivity and superiority – it needs nourishment. “Yes, you are my jack of all trades. You should develop this talent in yourself ”- this is how unobtrusively you can advise him to engage in self-development or some kind of business. Or maybe this way you advise him to stay at home more often, hanging shelves and fixing your laptop, instead of sitting in a bar with friends.
Do not try to prove that you know something better than him
Men love smart women, but such a woman will never demonstrate her intellectual superiority.Representatives of the strong half of society value beauty and kindness in us from the very beginning. If a girl is also an interesting interlocutor, this is a nice bonus, but a man is unlikely to fall in love with her because of her intellect. Do not rush with phrases: “I told you so”, “I know better how to do it,” and so on. Your partner will not appreciate your abilities; rather, they will outrage him. Act delicately, lead him to the necessary conclusions with leading questions.
See also: The main disadvantages of the zodiac signs
Wise advice for men
What advice should a man hear and remember? It is difficult to give good advice to a man, but we have a whole list that will change your life for the better.Tips for men that will come in handy now.
We asked men to share their thoughts, and they gave us great life advice. What do you need to know in order to realize yourself in life and become happy? Learn from other people’s stories and mistakes, because they tend to repeat themselves. It will save you a lot of time and effort.
Wise advice for men
1. School is not equated with wisdom, but knowledge with experience. That is why poor students often beat excellent students.
2.Ask yourself the questions: “Why am I at this point now?”, “Who am I?”, “What do I want?” Sometimes it clears the brain a lot.
3. When people criticize or point out mistakes, there is no need to get angry. This is an opportunity to get better.
4. Know your worth and don’t let women take advantage of your kindness.
5. Sport is the best option for a long-term investment in your appearance and health.
6. Do not base your decisions on someone else’s approval or opinion.
7.Don’t look for your path, but create your path.
8. Life is full of surprises, so it will be a good habit to think a few steps ahead.
9. Do not allow yourself to be made guilty for not doing what others want.
10. Do what is right and necessary for you, not what is pleasant or desirable.
11. Be honest with yourself. This is usually difficult.
12. Try to become a person you yourself would be proud of.
13. Think with your head, not other parts of your body.
14. Your words are a bullet. When they come out, you can no longer stop them. Always think and speak later. And silence has always been gold.
15. More positive, optimistic and smiling. Smile to the world so that it smiles back at you.
16. Have your own standards and don’t settle for less. This applies to work, career and relationships.
17. Don’t be too good a guy. This robs you of many competitive advantages in your career and personal life.
18.Confidence and self-reliance makes life easier.
19. Many things that you do or do not do are of great importance over a long distance.
20. Always show respect for people until they give a reason not to.
21. Even making mistakes, you become wiser and stronger. Do not give up.
22. Don’t let your emotions rule you. This does not lead to good.
23. Do not mess with crazy, negative, selfish and negative women.It will ruin your life.
24. Learn to cook and housekeeping. This will make you immune to loneliness.
25. Always look attractive and dress well. This provides many benefits in business, friendship and love.
26. If you do not like the place where you will be in 10 years, then it’s time to change the vector of motion.
27. It is sometimes helpful to take a step back to reflect. It’s better than acting recklessly.
28. Always improve in everything.The ideal can never be achieved.
29. Never accept dating advice from women. Usually no good.
30. Take care of hygiene, teeth, nails and hair all over the body. Take a shower daily. This is more important than you think.
31. Be nice and kind to people. The world is round.
32. Be curious and always ready to learn. There is never a lot of knowledge and experience. Learn. Learn. Learn again.
33. Alcohol, cigarettes, drugs are not cool.
34. It is better not to be accepted for who you really are. Than to be accepted for who you are not.
35. Visit your parents, loved ones and those who are dear more often. Say how you love and appreciate them. One day you won’t be able to do it.
36. Always have a backup plan, or several, in case the main one crashes.
37. Break up with the girl, and do not deceive her behind her back. It’s not worth it.
38. If you don’t know what you are talking about, then you better shut up.
39. Some goals are not always worth reaching. Sometimes it is better to give up an impossible dream and do something more adequate, which will succeed.
40. Treat the girl like an angel, and deal with intimacy like the last courtesan.
41. Find good friends with whom you have common interests and goals.
42. Avoid fights, but be prepared for a fight.
43. If you are surrounded by people with low standards, it does not mean that you should be one of them.Always strive for the best, not go with the flow.
44. Don’t lose sight of the little things.