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How women have an orgasm: The request could not be satisfied


The Female Climax, Orgasm, and Pleasure

How Women Achieve Orgasm

One of the ways women can experience orgasm is through a goal-oriented four-step process first described by the sex researchers William Masters and Virginia Johnson decades ago.

1. Excitement In this state of desire or arousal, the woman initiates or agrees to sex, and as it commences she finds herself focusing mainly on sexual stimuli. Blood begins to engorge the clitoris, vagina, and nipples, and creates a full-body sexual blush. Heart rate and blood pressure increases. Testosterone and neurotransmitters such as dopamine and serotonin are involved in these processes, says Dr. Ingber.

2. Plateau Sexual tension builds as a precursor to orgasm. The outer one-third of the vagina becomes particularly engorged with blood, creating what researchers refer to as the “orgasmic platform.” Focus on sexual stimuli drowns out all other sensations. Heart rate, blood pressure, and respiration continue to increase.

3. Orgasm A series of rhythmic contractions occur in the uterus, vagina, and pelvic floor muscles. The sexual tension caused by lovemaking or self-stimulation releases, and muscles throughout the body may contract. A feeling of warmth usually emanates from the pelvis and spreads throughout the entire body.

4. Resolution The body relaxes, with blood flowing away from the engorged sexual organs. Heart rate, blood pressure, and respiration return to normal.

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Different Types of Stimulation, Different Types of Orgasm

Women are blessed with bodies that are capable of experiencing orgasm in more ways than one.

Some researchers believe that there are as many as 12 types of female orgasms. The most common type is a “clitoral” orgasm, says Ingber.

RELATED:  Understanding the Male Climax 

Clitoral stimulation has been proved the surest route to orgasm. “I think that clitoral stimulation [produces] probably the closest analogue to male orgasm, where you get erectile tissue, there is release, and after release it is uncomfortable to continue,” says Steven R. Goldstein, MD, the director of gynecologic ultrasound and codirector of bone densitometry at New York University’s Langone Medical Center and a professor of obstetrics and gynecology at the New York University School of Medicine.

RELATED: Deconstructing Sex Drive: What Your Libido Says About Your Health

Vaginal Stimulation, the G-Spot, and Intense Sexual Pleasure

But some women can also experience orgasm through vaginal stimulation. One group of researchers credit the G-spot, an area named and described by Beverly Whipple, PhD, RN, a professor emerita at Rutgers University in Newark, New Jersey, and a past president of the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT).

The G-spot is an area felt through the wall of the vagina, an inch or two behind the back of the pubic bone near the junction of the bladder and the urethra and made up of tissues of the clitoris, urethra, and the female prostate gland, says Dr. Whipple. Some researchers believe that when stimulated, the G-spot causes intense sexual pleasure in some women; others question whether women can feel such pleasure at this location at all.

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Sensory Pathways, Stimulation, and Orgasm Generation

Women also have been able to have orgasms through stimulation of the breasts or other parts of the body, or through the use of sexual imagery without any touch at all. Researchers have even found a nerve pathway outside the spinal cord, through the sensory vagus nerve, that will lead a woman to experience orgasm through sensations transmitted directly to the brain. “There are many nerve pathways that are responsible for the experience of orgasm in women,” says Whipple.

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The Female Orgasm: Problems Getting There

While there are physical problems that can keep a woman from experiencing orgasm, emotions can play a role, too. Some sex researchers say that anxiety and depression can prevent a woman from progressing along the sexual response cycle, says Ingber. Feelings of fear, guilt, distraction, or a loss of control can also affect orgasm. Similarly to men with erectile dysfunction, women can sometimes have problems achieving or maintaining adequate blood flow, says Ingber.

RELATED:  Sex Therapy: What Men and Women Should Know

Treatments and Therapies to Help Women Reach Orgasm

It is estimated that as many as a quarter of American women have problems experiencing orgasm.

Doctors and sex therapists use several types of therapies to help women overcome these blocks to orgasm. Directed masturbation, sex education, and behavioral therapy are some of the means a woman might want to investigate if she cannot reach climax. Women may also want to try using a vibrator to provide increased clitoral stimulation, or a dildo crafted to provide better stimulation of the G-spot.

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Interventions to Consider for Problems With Orgasm

If behavioral methods are not working and a woman is interested in other intervention, there are solutions better-researched for male erectile dysfunction that may help.

Ingber says that “for women having trouble with arousal, similar to men, Viagra (sildenafil) can be used,” he says. “Additionally, vacuum erection devices such as the Fiera can be used in order to improve libido and arousal. This applies gentle suction to the clitoris.”

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Medical Treatments for Women With Low Sexual Desire

For women, particularly postmenopausal women, who have little sexual desire, an off-label use of topical testosterone can be prescribed. And an FDA-approved therapy called Addyi (flibanserin) may be effective for low libido in women with hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD), says Ingber.

Additional reporting by Dennis Thompson Jr.

How many types of orgasm are there?

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Orgasms are difficult to study.

Similar to studying mood or pain, female* orgasms need to be interpreted through not just biological mechanisms but also psychological, sociological and historical trends.

Historically, in Western countries, female orgasms have been highly scrutinized. Orgasms were sometimes seen as unhealthy or wrong. And orgasms that are achieved through stimulation that is not heterosexual vaginal intercourse have been considered unacceptable by researchers and doctors (1,2).

The viewpoint that some orgasms were superior to others has been supported by healthcare professionals.

Sigmund Freud popularized the idea that mature women experience vaginal orgasm while immature women enjoyed clitoral stimulation (1-3).

The importance of vaginal orgasm became so rooted in 20th-century health that an inability to reach orgasm through heterosexual penetrative sex became part of a diagnosable condition in the DSM III (i. e. psychology and psychiatry’s diagnostic book) (4).

Although most healthcare professionals no longer consider inability for penetrative sex to induce orgasm to be a problem (unless their patients are distressed by it), many people feel that orgasm is a requirement for happy, meaningful and/or fulfilling sex (2). Some people also feel that orgasms should be reserved for sex, as opposed to experiencing orgasm during masturbation (1). Orgasm is great, but feeling pressure to have an orgasm, or a certain type of orgasm at a certain time, can make sex stressful and unpleasant.

The historical and social aspects of orgasm can obscure research

Researchers may bias respondents’ answers by asking questions that imply that an orgasm type exists.

Relatedly, there is a disagreement among some sex researchers about how to classify orgasms (3,5). For example, if stimulation of a non-genital body part causes the genitals to become aroused and the person experiences an orgasm, did the stimulation of the non-genitals cause the orgasm, or was it the arousal of the genitals that caused the orgasm?

Even if a researcher were to do a study using tools that measure arousal, this doesn’t avoid all problems.

People with female genitals have been shown to experience arousal in their genitals but not report arousal to researchers, suggesting that bodily arousal is insufficient indicator of sexual interest or pleasure (5).

Compounding researcher problems are problems of gathering participants for sex and orgasm studies. Enrolling participants in a study is always tricky, but when someone studies a topic that is potentially considered taboo or private, it can be difficult to ensure that your sample is representative of all people in all cultures (this is also called external validity). It also may be difficult for participants to accurately remember or know where and how they were stimulated to cause orgasm (5).

So given all these issues, why talk about orgasms at all?

Given the large amount of social and media commentary on orgasm, it’s important to understand how our bodies and the bodies of our partners actually work so that we can help reduce stigma and stress during sex. In the process, we may learn a thing or two on how to make sex more enjoyable.

The different types of female orgasms

Different types or different stimuli?

There are many pop-science articles (i.e. articles not published in a research journal) that claim there are anywhere from four to 15 different types of orgasms. As mentioned before, there’s a lot of debate as to how to classify female orgasms. However, there’s little evidence to support the idea that different stimuli reliably (i.e. repeatedly, under experimental conditions) cause different types of female orgasms or different intensity of orgasms. Most people report that “some orgasms are better than others” (6), but this doesn’t necessarily seem to be related to the stimuli that cause that orgasm.

Clitoral stimulation

The clitoris contains a bundle of nerve endings and is located in the front of the female vulva and under the clitoral hood (i.e. the triangle part of female genitals that connects to the labia) (3). The clitoris, similar to a penis, will swell, enlarge and become more sensitive as a person becomes more sexually aroused (3,5).

Stimulation of the clitoris is probably the easiest way for most people to experience an orgasm.

In a 2017 study of over 1,000 women from the US, about 7 out of 10 people who had heterosexual sex said that they required clitoral stimulation to orgasm during that sex or that clitoral stimulation improved orgasms even if they didn’t require it to orgasm (6,7).

The type of clitoral stimulation preferred varied among the women in the study, though many women reported enjoying direct clitoral stimulation and stimulation that involved making circles or “up-and-down” movement (6).

That being said, there was a wide diversity in answers regarding how and in which ways a person liked having their clitoris stimulated, with even a few people saying they didn’t like direct contact at all (6).

Vaginal stimulation

A vaginally-stimulated orgasm is an orgasm that occurs through intentional stimulation of only the vagina. Although the clitoris or other body parts may be accidentally touched in the process, to have a “vaginal orgasm” there would be no intentional stimulation of other body parts.

In the same study described above, less than 1 in 5 women reported being able to orgasm through vaginal stimulation without clitoral stimulation (6).

The ability to orgasm from only vaginal sex may be related to the G-spot, though that is up for debate. The G-spot is not well understood (5,8,9). The G-spot may be its own structure, but it has also been argued that the G-spot is actually a retracted or enlarged clitoris or is a set of nerve endings attached to the clitoris (5,8,9). It’s also argued that the G-spot doesn’t exist at all (3,5). Regardless, there isn’t evidence to suggest that an orgasm from penetration-only is somehow superior to other forms of orgasm; in fact, intentional clitoral stimulation may make orgasm better than penetration-only orgasm (6).

Stimulation of other body parts

There is less research into orgasms caused by stimulation of body parts that aren’t the genitals. Because many of these studies are small and aren’t all recent (10), the proportions of people reporting these types of orgasms may not be representative of the rate we would find in a large, representative survey. That being said, these studies do suggest that people don’t necessarily need to directly stimulate their clitoris or vagina to experience an orgasm.

Some studies have found that people can experience orgasm through stimulation of the mouth, nipples, breasts, anus, and skin surrounding an injury (6,10).

Research with participants who have severe injuries to the spinal cord and with participants who have epileptic seizures suggest that there are orgasmic experiences that may be induced without direct incorporation of the genitals (10).

Orgasms outside of sex

Arousal of the genitals and even orgasm itself aren’t necessarily just experiences that happen during sex.

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Exercise-induced orgasm

Exercise, especially weight training, cardio, and abdominal-focused exercise, can induce orgasms (sometimes called coregasms in pop-science) and other positive genital stimulation (11). This makes sense biologically, as both exercise and sex can stimulate the muscles around the genitals and can lead to increased blood flow to the area of the body. Exercise may also influence our mood via endorphins and other neurotransmitters (12), similar to sex and orgasm (13).

Orgasms during sleep

Many people experience sexual arousal or orgasm during sleep (10). It’s difficult to say what or how exactly this happens. Because reporting from dreams can be unreliable, it’s difficult to say if all arousal and orgasms during sleep are caused by sexual dreams (10,11). Similarly, no research has currently looked at whether people were unconsciously stimulating their bodies during sleep or were being stimulated by bedding or other objects, so we’re not currently able to say if orgasms during sleep happen entirely unaided from stimulation (10).

Better orgasms

The goal of many orgasm-themed articles is to help people enjoy their orgasm or gain new experiences. Although there’s little evidence to suggest that orgasm from any particular type of stimulation is better than another, there are some suggestions in the literature on factors that increase or change our orgasmic experience. In the published literature, people reported that orgasms and sexual arousal were enhanced by:

  • touching or stimulating nipples, breasts, or the anus (6,10,14),

  • engaging in new positions, types of sex, or new behaviors (6,15)

A happy sex life

Although portrayals of orgasm in media, partners’ expectations for our orgasms, and our own interest in experiencing orgasm can make us feel like we need to have an orgasm every time we have sex (2), a happy sex life doesn’t necessarily mean having a mind-blowing orgasm during every sexual experience. Many people report that not all orgasms are the same (6), which makes sense—our minds and bodies change from day to day (due to mood, health, stress levels, etc. ), and so it’s unrealistic to expect any type of stimulation to elicit the same experience every time. Orgasm is just one of many important elements to sexual satisfaction.  

*Note: This article uses the term female and male to refer to cis-gendered sexual anatomy. A person with entirely or partially female genitals may or may not be female as their gender, and a person with entirely or partially male genitals may or may not be male as their gender. There are also people with a mix of both male and female genitals, but unfortunately not a lot of research has been done with this population. I’m using the terms male and female to describe sexual organs because there is little agreement on other terms to use.

Article was originally published May 20, 2018.

Can’t Orgasm? Here’s Help for Women

About 10% of women have never had an orgasm — either with a partner or during masturbation. And quite a few of them have found their way into my therapy practice. That’s when I tell these women the good news: It is possible to learn to be orgasmic.

The first and most important lesson is to practice developing a balance of tension and relaxation during sexual activity. But, my women clients ask, how can they be both tense and relaxed at the same time? It’s a good question, and here is my two-part answer:

How to Have an Orgasm Step 1: Tense Up

The type of tension that helps women reach orgasm is muscle tension (myotonia). Many women have the mistaken impression that they should relax and “just lie there” because they’ve heard that relaxation during sex is important. But it turns out that muscle tension is often necessary for an orgasm. In my experience, the majority of women learn to have their first orgasm by incorporating a fair amount of leg, abdominal, and buttock tension.

Not surprisingly, women report that the most orgasm-inducing muscle contractions are in their lower pelvis. These are the same muscles you squeeze to stop the flow of urine midstream (a conscious contraction of this group is called a Kegel exercise).

What is the connection between tensing muscle groups and having an orgasm? Arousal. Contracting (or tensing) certain muscles increases blood flow throughout the body and often to the genital area. And arousal, of course, is the road map that helps lead most women to orgasm.

How to Have an Orgasm Step 2: Wind Down

So, where’s the relaxation part of this equation? In the brain. During sex, a woman should be focused simply on feeling the sensations of the stimulation.

Have a hard time relaxing? Think of a Times Square billboard in which words stream into view from the left-hand side to the right edge, and then disappear off the screen. During sex, many women find it helpful to program their own Times Square news crawl with a repetitive mantra such as “I can take as long as I want” or “This really feels great” on their mental silent radio. It keeps the brain occupied — but with a thought that will encourage sexual arousal rather than with a nervous, negative thought that might decrease arousal.

After this first lesson, I send my clients away with a homework assignment. During sex, they are to tense up their muscles and let their minds go silent. This technique takes practice, but it can work over time. And more often than not, my clients return to a future session with their own good news to report.

Can’t Orgasm? The Problem Could Be Medical

Therapy can help some women having difficulty with orgasm. For others, a medical condition or side effects from a medication may be causing the problem. Visit your doctor to rule out these causes. Options for treatment include the following:

  • An FDA-approved device called Eros helps increase blood flow to the genitals.
  • Over-the-counter creams may increase sensitivity and help a woman reach orgasm, although these are not FDA-approved. As always, talk to your doctor before starting any treatment.

Originally published in the March/April 2008 issue ofWebMD the Magazine.

Female Orgasm – What Does an Orgasm Feel Like

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Despite more than 75% of women needing more than penetration to orgasm, the trope of women climaxing immediately upon penetration in movies, tv, and porn, does not help A.) take the pressure off ourselves to orgasm within mere seconds, B.) redirect focus on what does help a majority of women orgasm, which is clitoral stimulation. With this “take-it-with-a-huge-grain-of-salt” orgasm narrative peddled by pop culture, it’s easy to wonder “Wait, was that really an orgasm?” even if you’re 99.999999% certain it was.

Some good news: the great thing about orgasms is that there are a ton of different kinds. You can have a really big, earth-shattering, makes you fall asleep right after, orgasm, or you can have a day where your climax results in the feeling of a mini-orgasm. The orgasm you might have in any particular situation can vary based on lots of things: intensity, sensation, situation, excitement, and possible fears or inhibitions. Maybe you experience a seriously fast heart beat when you’re going to town on yourself, but not when you’re with a partner… that’s totally normal!

With any orgasm, you may experience shaky legs, erect nipples, a tightness in or around your vagina, etc.—but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’ll happen every single time you orgasm. It’s also worth noting that just because your girlfriends talk about their orgasms doesn’t mean you’ll experience them the same way they do. (So don’t put too much pressure on yourself if you’ve got one vocal friend who brings up how they can orgasm vaginally and squirt when those two things haven’t ever really happened for you. Everyone’s body is different!)

Whether you’ve orgasmed more times than you even care to estimate or never at all, we can all use a reminder now and again to focus on our pleasure and just how important it is to know our own bodies to find out what makes us tick. Since female sex research notoriously sucks and there’s really no definitive way to tell if you did have an orgasm or what it’s supposed to feel like, we rounded up quotes from 39 women who describe what their orgasms feel like to better help you understand yours.

11 Types of Orgasms Every Person With A Vagina Should Have

Orgasms don’t always come easy, but thanks to the wildly subjective nature of human pleasure, there are so, so many ways to reach that peak. And I think we can agree that it is *worth it*, no matter what “type” of orgasm you experience. Although the orgasm rate for penis-havers is higher (boo), the erectile tissue for people with vaginas is spread out over a larger area, meaning more erogenous zones to enjoy and more ways to reach climax. So there is no reason that with a lil’ effort, lots of communication with partners, and a clear understanding of your body, that orgasm gap can’t be closed.

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Now, to clear things up, “different orgasms” doesn’t really mean different types so much as different ways to evoke the sensation. “Most researchers tend to believe that there’s really only one kind of orgasm that can be triggered by different parts of the body,” says Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist and the creator of Finishing School, an online orgasm course for women.

Sheila Loanzon, MD, a board-certified obstetrician and gynecologist and a fellow of the American Congress of Obstetrics and Gynecology, agrees that there aren’t always clear categories to orgasms. “Instead of thinking about kinds of orgasm, there are different ways that an orgasm can be reached,” she tells Women’s Health. Sometimes you can just aim to stimulate different areas to achieve an orgasm, and other times, it can be a combination of factors. “There can be clitoral, vaginal, breast, inner thigh, toe sucking, oral, sensual massage, and mental orgasms and so many more,” says Dr. Loanzon.

And this means even more exciting ways to spice up your sex life. Now let’s get started so you can get to trying out all 11 ways to have an orgasm.

1. Clitoral Orgasm

The clitoris is a small, nerve-dense structure seated at the top of the vaginal opening, and serves no function other than to provide sexual pleasure. “If you’ve never had an orgasm before, you want to start with the clitoris,” Marin says.

How to have a clitoral orgasm: First things first, you need to figure out if you prefer direct or indirect stimulation, which is to say, touching the clitoris itself, or through the labia and clitoral hood. Marin suggests rubbing it with your fingers (rather than a sex toy) at first, “going in a spiral type of shape around your clitoris.”

“Start pretty far from it and then spiral in closer to it until you’re finally spiraling over it, and then spiraling back out,” she says. Note when and how your body responds: With that knowledge base, experiment with different types of touch until you find the one that works for you.

2. G-spot orgasm

“The G spot is a hypothesized highly erogenous area on the anterior (or front) vaginal wall of the urethral sponge that can be stimulated during sexual activity,” Loanzon says. “It is the female equivalent to the prostate.”

How to have a G-spot orgasm: “Pee first so you don’t hold yourself back from climax, as G-spot stimulation can lead to a need-to-pee sensation and female ejaculation,” says Amy Levine, sex coach and founder of Ignite Your Pleasure. “Insert your middle finger in the vagina, on the belly-button side of the body. You’ll feel an area that’s likely corrugated in texture. Stop there and use a come-hither motion to stimulate or a toy rubbing or vibrating in that area.”

Or, if you’re having penetrative sex, try a position that hits your G-spot—rear entry positions work well for this—and keep stimulating the area until you climax.

3. Blended orgasm

Blended orgasms are combining clitoral stimulation with some kind of other stimulation, and that can actually be a great way—once you’ve mastered the clitoral orgasm—to figure out what other parts of your body feel like,” Marin says. So, theoretically, you could achieve blended orgasm from stimulating your nipples and your G-spot simultaneously, but the most common combination is clitoris and G-spot.

How to have a blended orgasm: If you’ve got both the G-spot and the clitoral orgasm down, you’re in great shape—basically, just stimulate the G-spot at the same time you stimulate your clit.

Or, if nipple tweaking, earlobe biting, or the anus are what get you going, focus your attention there. But for most people who have clitorises, involving that area will up your odds of achieving a blended orgasm.

4. Anal orgasm

“There are shared nerves from the anterior wall of the rectum to the vagina,” Dr. Loanzon previously told Women’s Health. “So for vagina owners, it may be possible for sexual arousal to occur from rectal stimulation,” she says. Plus, the legs of the clitoris stretch all the way back to the anus, so back door stimulation can fire up the clit, too.


How to have an anal orgasm: Alicia Sinclair, a certified sex educator and the CEO of b-vibe recommends incorporating your tried-and-true orgasm maneuvers into any anal adventure. She also suggests easing into anal play by inserting a finger first, “so that you can be the giver and receiver.” Use lots of lube, too, and work your way in slowly.

“When you put something inside the anal canal, push up in the same way toward the belly button, as you would in the vagina,” Sinclair explains. That way, “you have that same possibility of stimulating that central nerve area,” she says.

5. C-spot orgasm

The C-spot is your cervix, and involves nerve endings located in the cervix and around the uterus. Anatomical differences and surgical history—i.e., a hysterectomy that involves the cervix’s removal—can affect a person’s ability to achieve cervical orgasm, as can a partner’s penis size (if your partner happens to have a penis). Heavy thrusting with a particularly well-endowed partner may hurt, so communicate about how cervical stimulation feels for you.

How to have a cervical orgasm: The key to a cervical orgasm is the build-up, Jessica O’Reilly, Ph. D., author of The New Sex Bible resident sexologist for ASTROGLIDE, told Women’s Health. You have a better chance of achieving one—and of enjoying pleasurable, rather than painful, C-spot sensations—if you’re very turned on. So, save deep penetration until you’re close to climax, and then have your partner thrust (or use a sex toy or finger) so that they hit your cervix.

6. Nipples

You probably already know where and what the nipples are, but what you might not know is that some people can orgasm solely from their stimulation. As Men’s Health reported, in one study of 213 women, 29 percent reported having had a breast-based orgasm at some point in their lives.

“When the nipples are stimulated, oxytocin is released, which causes the same uterine and vaginal contractions associated with orgasm,” says ob-gyn Christiane Northrup, MD, author of Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom. “This brings more blood flow to the genitals and can trigger an orgasm.

How to have a nipple orgasm: “When it comes to nipple/breast pleasure, I wouldn’t get too hung up on the goal of orgasm,” O’Reilly says. “Focus on the pleasure and see where it leads.”

O’Reilly recommends experimenting with the area right above the areola, which many people find to be the most touch-sensitive. “Start on the outer edges, using the backs of your fingers ,and circle your way slowly into the center,” O’Reilly says. You can also roll the nipple between thumb and forefinger.

Some people may find it feels great to have a partner breath on, lick, suck, or pinch the nipples. This is all subjective, so it’s a matter of playing around to determine what feels best for you. A light touch, at least at first, may be best for breast action. Try gentle boob cupping while stimulating the nipples with a tongue or vibrator, rather than full-on grabbing.

7. Coregasm

A coregasm is “when you work out and you have orgasms” just from the physical activity, Marin says.

How to have a coregasm: Unfortunately, this may not be something you can train your body to do. “It seems to be people are kind of born doing that and it kind of tends to be an annoyance, more often than not,” Marin continues. Because yeah, exercising in a crowded gym and not being able to stop yourself from climaxing can get…awkward.

Typically, Marin explains, coregasms happen in two ways: “One is from running, where your thighs might be rubbing together and you’re getting a little bit of indirect clitoral stimulation.” But the more common one is from core workouts. “Some people with vaginas will have them from just doing sit-ups. Others experience them from yoga-type practices, or being in a bridge position where you really have your core engaged,” adds Marin. So maybe it’s more of an at-home workout type of experimentation…

8. Skin orgasm

A skin orgasm is also called “frisson,” like the tingle that runs through your limbs when you hear a particularly affecting song. Maybe you get goosebumps, maybe your hair stands up, or maybe you get a little shiver.

How to have a skin orgasm: Research shows that skin orgasms are most commonly triggered by music—but emotionally-evocative scenes in movies, moving artworks, or even other people with whom you feel a very special connection can spark frisson. It’s an unpredictable one, though.

9. Breath orgasm


“Sex is often pigeon-holed into a physical act involving the genitals, but the reality is that the hottest sex happens between our ears—and is often enhanced by how we use our breath and lungs,” O’Reilly says. “Your breath impacts your interpretation of sensations and helps to put your mind into a state conducive to experiencing pleasure.” Which is to say, you can in fact breathe your way to climax—while also dismissing the intrusive thoughts that can distract from pleasure, O’Reilly adds.

How to have a breath orgasm: First things first: O’Reilly suggests finding a quiet, comfortable place to lie down on your back. Placing your hand on your belly, breathe in deeply through your nose, such that you can feel your hand rise and fall, and exhale through an open mouth. Slowly, begin a mental scan of your body from head to toe, actively relaxing each body part as you go.

“The way you breathe has a significant impact on your sexual and orgasmic response,” O’Reilly explains. “And though each of our bodies is unique, many people report that deep, slow breathing intensifies their orgasms and can even result in multiple climaxes.”

But because everyone orgasms differently—whether from breathing exercises or physical touch—there’s no right way to do this: “You have to experiment with different types of breathing to see what works for you,” she continues, whether that’s rapid, shallow breaths, slow, deep breaths, inhalation through the nostrils, or any other type of breathing that feels especially good to you as you imagine yourself in an arousing scenario.

10. Fantasy orgasm

“So powerful is the mind’s hold over our sexuality that some people can actually ‘think’ themselves off,” says O’Reilly. This one is pretty self-explanatory: We’re talking about fantasizing your way to climax—not touching your body, just flexing your mind muscles until you peak. Often, breath work and fantasy will go hand-in-hand—you may well find that visualizing scenarios and your body’s response works best in conjunction with breathing exercises.


How to have a fantasy orgasm: “Though only a small percentage of people report being able to reach orgasm through fantasy alone, you may want to experiment with the power of your mind,” Dr. O’Reilly says. “Allowing your mind to wander into unchartered territory can help you to recognize and benefit from your most genuine fantasies and untapped desires.”

Don’t place any fantasy off limits, just let your mind go where it wants to go. Focus on your sexiest possible scenario—while also engaging whatever breath work feels best to you—and immerse yourself in it, imagining the touch and the atmosphere. Really get yourself into the scene, and just keep using your imagination until you and your fantasy self-climax.

11. Sleep Orgasm

“People of all genders can have orgasms in their sleep. Orgasm happens in the brain, and the brain is quite active at night,” Marin tells Women’s Health.

How to have a sleep orgasm: “Unfortunately, there’s no way to make yourself have a sleep orgasm. They’re fun when they happen, but you can’t do anything to create them,” said Marin. Darn.

Female Ejaculation

Did you know that female ejaculation, or squirting, is technically a completely separate process from orgasm? “You can squirt without orgasming, and orgasm without squirting,” Marin says. She also explains that a lot of fascination with this is unhealthy because it comes from seeing it in porn (which is faked most of the time).

If you personally want to see if it can happen some day, then great, go for it on your own or with someone else. But if your partner is insistent on making it happen because it’s a fantasy for them, make sure they know the science behind squirting (cough, cough, this is why we need sex ed).

How to squirt: “Remember that for most women, sex starts in the brain,” Taylor Sparks, erotic educator and founder of OrganicLoven.com, told Women’s Health in a previous interview. “Start the mental seduction earlier in the day.”

When the time has come for things to get steamy, focus on the clit, then the G-spot. “As the sensation/pressure starts to build, it will feel like you have to pee—that’s the time to use your pelvic floor muscles,” Sparks explains. “Don’t tighten them, but push out…as if you are pushing out the pee. It takes practice, but it’s doable.” (And remember: You won’t actually be peeing.) And, finally, if it doesn’t happen, it doesn’t happen and that is totally okay.

Can I have multiple types of orgasms in a row?

Those with vaginas can orgasm multiple times in a row, like a mountain range instead of a single peak 😉. Lucky ducks.

“People with penises have a refractory period, meaning that the body needs time to cool down before being able to get turned on and orgasm again. People with vaginas don’t have this, so they can orgasm again right away.” Marin says.

So go ahead…give a few of these a whirl. And remember to have fun along the way, even if you don’t end up orgasming from all of your attempts.

Claire Lampen
Claire is a freelance writer covering sex and gender.

Josey Murray
Josey Murray is the editorial fellow at Women’s Health.

This content is created and maintained by a third party, and imported onto this page to help users provide their email addresses. You may be able to find more information about this and similar content at piano.io

Why it exists and what women can do about it

In heterosexual relationships, women on average are having fewer orgasms than men — a problem that University of Florida professor Laurie Mintz, author of the book “Becoming Cliterate: Why Orgasm Equality Matters — And How to Get It,” calls “the orgasm gap.

According to a 2016 study from the Archives of Sexual Behavior that looked at over 52,500 adults in the U.S. — including those who are lesbian, gay, and bisexual — 95 percent of heterosexual men reported they usually or always orgasmed during sex, compared to 65 percent of heterosexual women, who were the least likely.

“The number-one reason for the orgasm gap — and it’s not the only one — is our cultural ignorance of the clitoris,” Mintz tells NBC News BETTER.

Anatomy of the clitoris

Picture a flower with closed petals. Within the flower is a nub that branches down into two bulbous legs.

This is the image feminist and artist Sophia Wallace conjures when she talks about the part of a woman’s body that experiences the most sexual pleasure. Not the vagina, she explains, but the vulva, and especially the external clitoris — the “nub” within the vulva which contains about 8,000 nerve endings.

“The bulbs of the clitoris surround the vagina, and that’s why — when the clitoris is engaged and aroused — penetration can feel amazing, but when it’s not aroused, it can feel really uncomfortable, or like nothing, because the sensation and pleasure comes from the clitoris, not the vagina,” Wallace says.

The clitoris is the only organ in the human body solely responsible for sexual pleasure. In Greek, it means “key.” According to Wallace, it’s usually seen as a small button-like organ within the vulva, but this, she says, is a misconception.

Sophia Wallace with her artwork, Άδάμας (unconquerable).Courtesy of Sophia Wallace

“The clitoris is not this little nub on the outside of the vulva,” she says, “but is actually this large internal organ comprised of erectile tissue that’s similar in scale to the penis.”

Wallace has spent the last seven years illuminating the importance of the clitoris through her project “Cliteracy,” currently on display at Project for Empty Space in Newark, NJ, and her mixed-media project “Cliteracy, 100 Natural Laws.”

The artist says most people are shocked when they see what the clitoris actually looks like.

“They never know the true anatomy,” says Wallace, whose 2015 TEDx Talk on the topic received nearly 120,000 views to date. “They never know anything about it. That tells me there’s so much more work that needs to be done.”


“Inequality in the bedroom”

Mintz, who teaches the psychology of human sexuality to hundreds of college students every year, blames what she calls “inequality in the bedroom” on depictions of “media images of sex,” especially in pornography, and a “cultural over-privileging of male sexuality and a devaluing of female sexuality.”

She says most women need direct clitoral stimulation — such as oral sex and touching — to orgasm, but this is rarely depicted.

“Instead,” she says, “what we see is women having these fast and fabulous orgasms from intercourse alone.”

According to a 2015 internet-based survey published in the Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, which received responses from over 1,000 U.S. women, 36 percent reported that clitoral stimulation helped them orgasm during intercourse, whereas slightly more than 18 percent reported they orgasmed from intercourse alone.

Women are also more likely to orgasm if they receive oral sex (in addition to other activities like deep kissing and intercourse), according to the Archives of Sexual Behavior study, but some studies show they are less likely to receive oral sex than they are to give it.


Dispelling the “g-spot”

At the center of the myth that women should orgasm from intercourse alone is what’s popularly known as the “g spot” — often depicted as a mysterious spot on the inside of the vagina, according to Mintz.

She says the “g spot” is real, but misunderstood.

“It’s an area in the upper right side of the vagina, and it’s an area which includes a lot of structures, including the legs of the clitoris, including the female prostate glands, including the wall of the vagina,” says Mintz.

Mintz says the external clitoris is the real center of female sexual pleasure, but she doesn’t dismiss the “g spot” — she says some women indeed find it pleasurable.

“What I’m trying to fight against is the pervasive myth that orgasms from vaginal penetration — including the ‘g spot’ — are better, more ideal, the right way …” says Mintz, “when in fact the vast majority of women need clitoral stimulation to orgasm.”

Women need to be aroused for sex

Like the penis, the clitoris becomes erect during arousal. “Women need to be aroused prior to penetration, according to Mintz — otherwise, the vagina doesn’t lubricate, and the cervix doesn’t pull back out of the way of the penis.”

“The overwhelming majority of women find that incredibly painful,” she says.

Every woman’s body is different when it comes to arousal, Mintz says, but the more time couples spend kissing, caressing, and engaging in oral sex, the more aroused she’s likely to be.

The most important thing is that women communicate to their partners what they like and don’t like, says Mintz, and that their partners are receptive to this.

“We need to be communicating what we need and feeling entitled to communicate that,” says Mintz.

Intercourse usually doesn’t last that long, and that’s ok

For the average heterosexual couple, penetration lasts 3-5 minutes, according to Mintz. But she says media depictions of sex, particularly in pornography, have led many to think it should last a lot longer.

“We have all these men calling into sex therapists worried that they’re not lasting long enough,” she says.

In some ways the male body, like the female body, is also misunderstood, according to Sarah Byrden, a sex educator and speaker.

The penis, she explains, moves in “rhythms and tides.”

“It is not designed to be consistently erect as it is depicted in all kinds of media — able to be erect inordinate amounts of time — and that is where huge performance pressure comes,” Byrden says.


For greater pleasure, mix things up

Both women and men enjoy greater pleasure when they receive a mix of acts, whether through oral sex or touching, before, during, and after penetration, according to Mintz.

“Forget this myth of orgasming from the same act at the same time,” says Mintz. “Adopt a different way of doing sex.”


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How do women really know if they are having an orgasm? | Sex

In the nascent field of orgasm research, much of the data relies on subjects self-reporting, and in men, there’s some pretty clear physiological feedback in the form of ejaculation.

But how do women know for sure if they are climaxing? What if the sensation they have associated with climax is actually one of the the early foothills of arousal? And how does a woman know if she has had an orgasm?

Neuroscientist Dr Nicole Prause set out to answer these questions by studying orgasms in her private laboratory. Through better understanding of what happens in the body and the brain during arousal and orgasm, she hopes to develop devices that can increase sex drive without the need for drugs.

Understanding orgasm begins with a butt plug. Prause uses the pressure-sensitive anal gauge to detect the contractions typically associated with orgasm in both men and women. Combined with EEG, which measures brain activity, this allows for a more accurate picture of a woman’s arousal and orgasm.

Dr Nicole Prause has founded Liberos to study brain stimulation and desire. Photograph: Olivia Solon

When Prause began studying women in this way she noticed something surprising. “Many of the women who reported having an orgasm were not having any of the physical signs – the contractions – of an orgasm.”

It’s not clear why that is, but it is clear that we don’t know an awful lot about orgasms and sexuality. “We don’t think they are faking,” she said. “My sense is that some women don’t know what an orgasm is. There are lots of pleasure peaks that happen during intercourse. If you haven’t had contractions you may not know there’s something different.”

Research could lead ​to a device put on before intercourse to increase responsiveness to sexual stimuli

Prause, an ultramarathon runner and keen motorcyclist in her free time, started her career at the Kinsey Institute in Indiana, where she was awarded a doctorate in 2007. Studying the sexual effects of a menopause drug, she first became aware of the prejudice against the scientific study of sexuality in the US.

When her high-profile research examining porn “addiction” found the condition didn’t fit the same neurological patterns as nicotine, cocaine or gambling, it was an unpopular conclusion among people who believe they do have a porn addiction.

The evolution of design of the anal pressure gauge used in Nicole Prause’s lab to detect orgasmic contractions. Photograph: Olivia Solon

“People started posting stories online that I had falsified my data and I received all kinds of sexist attacks,” she said. Soon anonymous emails of complaint were turning up at the office of the president of UCLA, where she worked from 2012 to 2014, demanding that Prause be fired.

Does orgasm benefit mental health?

Prause pushed on with her research, but repeatedly came up against challenges when seeking approval for studies involving orgasms. “I tried to do a study of orgasms while at UCLA to pilot a depression intervention. UCLA rejected it after a seven-month review,” she said. The ethics board told her that to proceed, she would need to remove the orgasm component – rendering the study pointless.

Undeterred, Prause left to set up her sexual biotech company Liberos, in Hollywood, Los Angeles, in 2015. The company has been working on a number of studies, including one exploring the benefits and effectiveness of “orgasmic meditation”, working with specialist company OneTaste.

Part of the “slow sex” movement, the practice involves a woman having her clitoris stimulated by a partner – often a stranger – for 15 minutes. “This orgasm state is different,” claims OneTaste’s website. “It is goalless, intuitive, and dynamic. It flows all over the place with no set direction. It may include climax, or it may not. In Orgasm 2.0, we learn to listen to what our body wants instead of what we think we ‘should’ want.”

Prause wants to determine whether arousal has any wider benefits for mental health. “The folks that practice this claim it helps with stress and improves your ability to deal with emotional situations even though as a scientist it seems pretty explicitly sexual to me,” she said.

Prause is examining orgasmic meditators in the laboratory, measuring finger movements of the partner, as well as brainwave activity, galvanic skin response and vaginal contractions of the recipient. Before and after measuring bodily changes, researchers run through questions to determine physical and mental states. Prause wants to determine whether achieving a level of arousal requires effort or a release in control. She then wants to observe how Orgasmic Meditation affects performance in cognitive tasks, how it changes reactivity to emotional images and how it compares with regular meditation.

Brain stimulation is ‘theoretically possible’

Another research project is focused on brain stimulation, which Prause believes could provide an alternative to drugs such as Addyi, the “female Viagra”. The drug had to be taken every day, couldn’t be mixed with alcohol and its side-effects can include sudden drops in blood pressure, fainting and sleepiness. “Many women would rather have a glass of wine than take a drug that’s not very effective every day,” said Prause.

The field of brain stimulation is in its infancy, though preliminary studies have shown that transcranial direct current stimulation (tDCS), which uses direct electrical currents to stimulate specific parts of the brain, can help with depression, anxiety and chronic pain but can also cause burns on the skin. Transcranial magnetic stimulation, which uses a magnet to activate the brain, has been used to treat depression, psychosis and anxiety, but can also cause seizures, mania and hearing loss.

Prause is studying whether these technologies can treat sexual desire problems. In one study, men and women receive two types of magnetic stimulation to the reward center of their brains. After each session, participants are asked to complete tasks to see how their responsiveness to monetary and sexual rewards (porn) has changed.

With DCS, Prause wants to stimulate people’s brains using direct currents and then fire up tiny cellphone vibrators that have been glued to the participants’ genitals. This provides sexual stimulation in a way that eliminates the subjectivity of preferences people have for pornography.

“We already have a basic functioning model,” said Prause. “The barrier is getting a device that a human can reliably apply themselves without harming their own skin.”

Liberos’s proposed direct current stimulation (DCS) device, configured to stimulate the brain areas associated with reward.

There is plenty of skepticism around the science of brain stimulation, a technology which has already spawned several devices including the headset Thync, which promises users an energy boost, and Foc.us, which claims to help with endurance.

Neurologist Steven Novella from the Yale School of Medicine uses brain stimulation devices in clinical trials to treat migraines, but he says there’s not enough clinical evidence to support these emerging consumer devices. “There’s potential for physical harm if you don’t know what you’re doing,” he said. “From a theoretical point of view these things are possible, but in terms of clinical claims they are way ahead of the curve here. It’s simultaneously really exciting science but also premature pseudoscience.”

Biomedical engineer Marom Bikson, who uses tDCS to treat depression at the City College of New York, agrees. “There’s a lot of snake oil.”

Sexual problems can be emotional and societal

Prause, also a licensed psychologist, is keen to avoid overselling brain stimulation. “The risk is that it will seem like an easy, quick fix,” she said. For some, it will be, but for others it will be a way to test whether brain stimulation can work – which Prause sees as a more balanced approach than using medication. “To me, it is much better to help provide it for people likely to benefit from it than to try to create fake problems to sell it to everyone.”

Sexual problems can be triggered by societal pressures that no device can fix. “There’s discomfort and anxiety and awkwardness and shame and lack of knowledge,” said psychologist Leonore Tiefer, who specializes in sexuality. Brain stimulation is just one of many physical interventions companies are trying to develop to make money, she says. “There’s a million drugs under development. Not just oral drugs but patches and creams and nasal sprays, but it’s not a medical problem,” she said.

Thinking about low sex drive as a medical condition requires defining what’s normal and what’s unhealthy. “Sex does not lend itself to that kind of line drawing. There is just too much variability both culturally and in terms of age, personality and individual differences. What’s normal for me is not normal for you, your mother or your grandmother.”

And Prause says that no device is going to solve a “Bob problem” – when a woman in a heterosexual couple isn’t getting aroused because her partner’s technique isn’t any good. “No pills or brain stimulation are going to fix that,” she said.

90,000 Heterosexual women experience orgasm less often than all others

Photo author, Thinkstock

Heterosexual women experience orgasm much less often than lesbian, gay or heterosexual men.

This is evidenced by the results of a large-scale study undertaken by a group of American scientists from Indiana, Chapman and Claremont Universities.

52600 US residents took part in the study.Scientists tried to find out how often representatives of each of the presented groups experience orgasm, depending on gender and sexual orientation.

It turned out that orgasm is regularly experienced by:

  • 65% of heterosexual women 90,020 90,019 66% of bisexual women 90,020 90,019 86% of lesbians
  • 90,019 88% of bisexual men

  • 89% of homosexual men
  • 95% of heterosexual men

” Many heterosexual women could orgasm much more often, “the scientists note.

Among the techniques they recommend to diversify the sex life of heterosexual women are oral sex and manual stimulation of the genitals.

The most important thing in orgasm

Researchers point to an obvious direct relationship between the frequency of oral sex, the number of orgasms experienced and the degree of satisfaction of heterosexual women, lesbians, bisexual women, as well as homosexual and bisexual men.

The only group that does not have such a correlation are heterosexual men.

Scientists believe that the significant differences in the frequency of orgasms experienced by heterosexual men and women may have an explanation from both a social and evolutionary point of view.

For example, in some cultures it is still considered a shame for women to publicly express their sexual desires, while some men are convinced that their partner can only experience an orgasm as a result of traditional penetration sex.

From an evolutionary perspective, scientists suggest that initially male and female orgasms have different goals.

The most important thing in a male orgasm is ejaculation and procreation, while a woman’s orgasm “helps to establish a long-term relationship with a romantic partner.”

The results of the research by American scientists were published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior.

Female orgasm: truth and myths, types of orgasm in women

Female orgasm occurs as a result of mechanical stimulation of erogenous zones, usually genitals, during vaginal intercourse, oral or anal sex, masturbation, stimulation of erogenous zones by the hand of a partner, tongue.

Types of orgasm in women

1. Clitoral – the simplest and most affordable. Stimulation of the clitoris can be done by a partner – a member, hands, lips. You can stimulate yourself during masturbation, sex toys will also help. It is important to stimulate the clitoris gently, it is very gentle. The sensations are localized and short-term.

2. Vaginal – can be experienced when the penis is inserted into the vagina. The peak of pleasure can be reached easily and effortlessly. We relax more during such an orgasm.It lasts longer than clitoral. The slower the sex, the brighter the sensation.

3. Uterine – the strongest and longest. It can be felt with the whole body. Reaches thanks to intense deep movements of the penis and a long dildo. The member rubs against the walls of the uterus, it contracts, an orgasm occurs. It is important that there is trust between partners, to relax as much as possible, not to rush.

Why is it more difficult for a woman to get an orgasm than for a man? – What sexologists say

Let’s take an evolutionary perspective on orgasm. It was invented by nature so that we can continue our look. It is harder for a woman to discharge than a man for one simple reason: if it was achieved easily, she would receive sexual pleasure earlier than the male, and would say: “Everything, boy, bye, good mood.” You cannot continue the view.

Why do women need an orgasm? Today there are two hypotheses. The first of them: at the moment of the highest sexual pleasure, an additional contraction of the reproductive apparatus occurs – only the most active and successful sperm cells can reach the ovum.Second: the female orgasm is just an atavism, a relic of evolutionary development. The same as, for example, the nipples in men, in which there is no physiological need.

If intercourse with many males was characteristic of human evolution, then the apparent discrepancy between the relatively quick orgasmic response of the male and the so-called delayed response in the female receives a completely reasonable explanation (note: the female is “late” only if we assume that the male occurs “on time” . ..Rapid completion of intercourse by the male reduces the chances of being thwarted by predators or other males (the fittest survives), and the female and her baby will benefit from the unconscious control under which the sperm fertilize the egg.

About 80% of women experience clitoral orgasms. The fact is that the location of the clitoris is different for all women. In some, it is located close to the entrance to the vagina, in some, a little further. The further away the clitoris is, the less likely it is to experience vaginal, as the clitoral legs do not reach the vaginal walls, where stimulation occurs.In this case, the size of the penis does not play a role. Two factors are leading here: certain postures and the development of vaginal muscles.

When we were looking for information about female pleasure, we came across a number of interesting facts. For example: a woman is 30% more likely to reach orgasm if her feet are warm, and the first electric vibrators appeared 9 years before the advent of vacuum cleaners and 10 years before the electric iron. And the question of the secret of female sexual pleasure, alas, still remains open.But in any case, while scientists are hotly debating among themselves, the achievement of pleasure remains one of the most popular ways of spending time for millions of men and women on all continents.

Truth and myths about female orgasm

Poses do not matter

Sex positions are important for a woman. Each of them stimulates a different part of the female body. The quality of pleasure depends on the posture. A real female orgasm is often in the head.

Sex always ends with orgasm

If a woman doesn’t get it every time she has sex, she’s fine. Fertilization is influenced by men, so it is important for them to ejaculate every sex.

Clit Play – Girls

Sigmund Freud once came to this idea. He said that a sexually mature woman is experiencing vaginal. Now it is believed that the clitoral orgasm is a full-fledged one. Your right, how best to have fun.

The orgasm we get during masturbation is less pleasant

What could be better than studying your body and giving yourself pleasure. The way in which pleasure is achieved is not at all important, the main thing is the result. And if you still have great fantasy and imagination, masturbatory orgasm will not keep you waiting long.

Interrupted intercourse is a reliable method of contraception

You can protect yourself from unwanted pregnancy by using a spiral or condoms.And, of course, there is always the chance of getting pregnant. It is the highest for interrupted intercourse. Especially if it is repeated overnight. Sperm are often excreted before the final ejaculation.

Women love only gentle sex

It all depends on temperament and character. Many women enjoy rough and passionate sex. With the use of various sets for sex games from the sex shop.

Masturbation is harmful to health

Masturbation is one of the options to have fun.It does not affect sexuality, desire, or the ability to have orgasms in any way.

Women can imitate the highest pleasure

So much so that men believe.

Relaxation is an important part of sex

Like the prelude. For women, tenderness, kisses and touch are important. In a relaxed state, there is a high probability of getting a release.

Female orgasm is always visible

Completion of sexual intercourse for a girl is not always loud.Not all women like to scream and wriggle. Therefore, identifying orgasm may not always be easy.

Does a woman need an orgasm?

Orgasm for a woman needs , as it provides full emotional discharge , which has a beneficial effect on the psychological state of a woman. In addition, during sexual arousal, blood rushes to the external and internal genital organs.After orgasm, organ plethora quickly disappears. If orgasm does not occur, the blood stagnates, which can lead to various disorders or be a background for their development.

Why is there no orgasm?

The ability to have an orgasm is given to all women as the ability to pronounce the letter “P”. Whether everyone in childhood was taken to a speech therapist – no. Some of the children learned to pronounce all the letters themselves, others were taught by speech therapists, and the rest lisp their whole lives. So it is with an orgasm.

Some women already from adolescence begin to experience an orgasm either from various activities (climbing a tightrope, running after a bus, riding a bicycle, etc.) or discovering a way of masturbation (accidentally getting pleasant sensations from a shower, etc.) ). Orgasm comes into their life even before the onset of sexual activity. By the beginning of sexual activity, their brain already knows what the impulses coming from the genitals should lead to, and forms an orgasm.

Another part of women during adolescence, if they experience pleasant sensations in the genital area, is either ashamed of these sensations and suppresses them (at the time of education or fear), or all attempts to enhance these sensations (through various options for masturbation) do not end in success.

The onset of sexual activity triggers several scenarios.

Option one. Sex life quickly begins to bring pleasure, there are no problems with orgasm.

Option two. A girl who knows how to get an orgasm on her own cannot achieve it during intercourse with a man. This is probably the most common scenario. There are many reasons for this, but the most common are the following:

  1. A man prepares a woman very poorly for sexual intercourse , she does not have time to be fully aroused, sexual intercourse proceeds very quickly – the woman actually does not have enough time.
  2. The woman gets used to the clitoral orgasm , the sensations from the vagina are pleasant, but they are not enough for an orgasm to occur. Often a woman gets out of the situation by additional stimulation of the clitoris during intercourse, but even with the onset of orgasm, a feeling of dissatisfaction remains, since the orgasm turned out to be half independent.
  3. A woman experiences emotional rejection towards a man and / or pain. Of course, in this situation, it is almost impossible to get an orgasm
  4. The formation of orgasm is fixed for some specific action , which is absent during normal intercourse.The simplest example is a shower. A woman gets used to enjoying the shower, and the nature of the stimulation during intercourse cannot give her the same sensations. Or the need to squeeze the hips during orgasm – at certain positions this is impossible and a woman cannot achieve what she wants without it. There are also some psychologically fixed rituals.
  5. The peculiarity of the location of the vagina in the perineum (there are three options – anterior, middle, posterior). Each of the options corresponds to a position in which a woman gets the most pleasure and a position in which she may simply be unpleasant.For example, with the posterior position of the vaginal opening, the knee-elbow position will be the most acceptable position, and the “rider” position will be extremely difficult and not comfortable.
  6. Emotional suppression effect – a woman considers sexual intercourse something dirty and not decent or an experienced case of sexual abuse – all this does not allow a woman to enjoy.
  7. The presence of gynecological diseases – pain, discomfort associated with this – do not allow you to experience an orgasm.

Option three.
A woman did not experience an orgasm before the onset of sexual activity, and nothing has changed with the onset of sexual activity.

Option four. A woman has an orgasm with one man, and the other does not. See the second option for the reasons.

How to learn to have an orgasm?

Immediately I will weigh those who, after reading the question, said – “Find a good and skillful man.” Of course, a good, competent and skillful man can handle it.Returning to the example with the letter “R” – such a man will become a speech therapist for a woman. The problem is that there are few such men, and there are much more women who want to experience an orgasm.

What to do?

There is one very simple principle – first learning and training, then playing.

Let me give an example again: at a resort you pass by a tennis court and you are offered to play, even though you have never played this game or even held a racket in your hands.Someone, taking the racket in hand, begins to play and quickly during the game feels how to hit the ball so that the ball hits the field. Others do not succeed and the ball flies all over the court, but not where it should be. In this case, they propose to practice at the wall – to feel the racket, the impact of the ball, the force of the rebound, etc. Having acquired this skill, a person goes to the court prepared, he already knows how to hit the ball in order for the ball to fly further or closer, higher or tangentially.

Education and training, if we talk about orgasm, are necessary for your body to know what the sensations are from various types of stimulation of the genitals and erogenous zones.So that the mechanisms of concentration of impulses coming from the nerve endings of the genital organs to the parts of the brain responsible for the formation of orgasm are firmly entrenched. To bring this, in fact, a reflex to automatism.

With some preparation, and most importantly desire, almost every woman who has not experienced an orgasm during sexual activity can begin to receive it.
In order to learn how to experience an orgasm, you need to understand how it is formed.

How an orgasm is formed

The genitals and erogenous zones contain special nerve endings that differ from others (pain, temperature, etc.)etc.) of nerve endings by the structure of the sensitive part. These nerve endings, in response to various types of stimulation (friction, vibration), begin to send nerve impulses to the brain, which in response to this triggers various processes in the body (rush of blood to the genitals, increased release of lubricant, increased heart rate, increased sensitivity of certain areas body, etc.)

In addition, all nerve impulses coming from nerve endings during stimulation of the genitals are summed up in one focus of the brain, exciting it more and more.There is a kind of spring twisting effect. When the excitation of this focus of the brain reaches a certain limit, a cascade of reactions is triggered (muscle contractions, convulsions, the release of special substances in the brain), which dumps this accumulated energy and returns to a calm state. In simple terms, this is simple physics for the 6th grade – you rotate the flywheel until the electrical energy received is not enough to light the light bulb.


  • Multiple orgasm – in some women, the excitation focus formed in the brain well summarizes nerve impulses, can quickly accumulate critical energy and, after its release, retains increased excitability to any stimulus coming from the genitals.
  • Orgasm worn out, weak – accordingly, nerve impulses are poorly summed up, there is little energy to start a cascade of autonomic reactions
  • Orgasm is not formed (despite the fact that there are pleasant sensations) – the focus of excitation cannot accumulate enough nerve impulses to start a cascade of reactions, or the impulses are not strong enough, or they do not add up, but simply dissipate. This focus can easily suppress the cerebral cortex (your consciousness)
  • Orgasm in a dream or other unusual situation – it is known that our consciousness can create hallucinations (that is, it is easy to reproduce visual, auditory and tactile images), therefore it is not difficult for the cerebral cortex to collect impulses (from bright visual , auditory or tactile experiences) and create a focus of arousal, forming an orgasm.In addition, such orgasms, as a rule, occur when a woman has a long period of abstinence and the nervous system as a whole is overstrained. Orgasm in this case should be perceived as self-regulation of the nervous system, a kind of fuse effect.

If you have difficulty reaching orgasm , you have never had an orgasm – I can help you solve this problem . During the consultation, we will analyze your situation and identify the reasons that led to it.Next, I will draw up an individual training program for you. The offer is valid only for residents of Moscow and the nearest Moscow region. Where to begin ? – write me a letter with a detailed statement of the problem to the address [email protected] and after a preliminary acquaintance with the situations, I will invite you to an appointment.


The main goal: to teach the sensitive receptors of the genital organs to respond quickly and intensely to stimulation and to accustom the mind to accept these sensations and enhance, rather than suppress them.

It is known that in most cases problems with orgasm can be treated with only one method – masturbation (cognition of one’s body and reactions to various stimuli). However, masturbation is different.

Common mistake: It is believed that masturbation is a great way to know your body and learn how to have an orgasm, but masturbation “in a hurry” (sorry for the pun) is only harmful, since orgasm, even if it happens, is often superficial and not bright , and the unpleasant aftertaste only aggravates the problem.

Therapeutic masturbation is primarily about developing your sensuality, suppressing shame and eliminating disgust for your genitals.

Masturbation that benefits is a long process (even if it will be less frequent, but full of value).

In the next part I will tell you how to start enjoying sex and start having an orgasm. I’ll tell you what the G-point is from an anatomical and physiological point of view and other nuances.

My lecture “Anatomy and physiology of sexual intercourse and female orgasm”

90,000 A Brief History of the Female Orgasm Business – Company Secret

In 2016, scientists Michaela Pavlichev of Cincinnati College of Medicine and Gunther Wagner of Yale published the hypothesis that the female orgasm is an evolutionary relic. If in ancient times he contributed to fertilization – women of the genus homo needed stimulation of the genitals for ovulation – now the female body copes with this task without orgasm.Modern scientists at least do not deny that women can (and should) enjoy sex, and until the 20th century it was believed that only men are capable of orgasm.

The female orgasm was underestimated, they did not believe in it, it was considered shameful. And yet, businessmen have managed to build a multi-billion dollar sex toy industry, which is primarily intended for women, and open a huge number of female sex shops.

The Secret tells how vibrators from medical devices turned into mass-market items, masturbation ceased to be a taboo topic, and the whole world believed in the existence of a female orgasm

How it all began

Until 1869, unexplained nervous disorders in women were treated with massage genitals.It was believed that during this massage the woman has a “seizure”, after which she feels better. In 1653, the famous Dutch physician Peter van Forest, in his medical reference book, devoted a separate chapter to diseases that only women suffer. There he described the symptoms of hysteria, or “rabies of the uterus”: insomnia, anxiety, mood swings. “If symptoms are evident, then you need to ask the midwife to massage the woman’s genitals with a finger, softening it with lily oil or musk root.This will lead to a fit of hysteria. This treatment is most often needed by widows and religious women. Young women, prostitutes, or married ladies generally do not need it, ”Forest wrote. Doctors took on jobs that men did not. Until the middle of the 20th century, no one thought that a woman could enjoy sex, so husbands did not try to please their wives in bed. About half of women in Europe suffered from sexual dissatisfaction, and about 75% in Victorian England.The doctors found it difficult to cope with the flow of visitors, and they increasingly said that it was necessary to invent some kind of mechanism for massaging the genitals.

In 1869, the American physician George Taylor patented the first device that could be conventionally called a vibrator. It was a table with a hole in the middle. In the hole was a circular vibrating device on a steam engine, on which the patients sat from above. Taylor offered to treat nervous disorders and gynecological diseases with his “manipulator”.At the same time, he believed that women should use this device only under the supervision of doctors in order to avoid “pampering”.

The clitoris is the head of the whole? What is a female orgasm, and why does someone never experience it

In the new issue of Psychology, sexologist Amina Nazaralieva tells everything you wanted to know about the female orgasm. Why does each one have it – special, what phases does it consist of, and how does it really depend on a partner? And also – why have some women never experienced it and do they have a chance that someday it will happen?

Hello.My name is Amina Nazaralieva, I am a sexologist, psychotherapist and co-founder of the Mental Health Center. Today we will talk about female orgasms. Before we start, I would like to talk about what an orgasm is, where it is, how it generally relates to everything else.

When we first, and this is about the middle of the last century, when we first began to try to answer all these questions, the first model of human sexual reactions was proposed, this is the model of Masters and Johnson.What they claimed, they argued that this is the first phase of our sexual response, this is arousal, if you look at the graph, this is still so low, our body is still not very responsive, gradually our arousal is growing. Then we reach a plateau for some time, usually it is associated with frictions, we have a very strong excitement, for example, eight points out of ten. And finally, this surge happens to us, this is an orgasm, and then there is such a phase of resolution, resolution, release, when you don’t want anything, you just want to turn away or lie down like a bag and just sleep.And no new orgasms, no new ejaculations are available anytime soon. This is the most banal, the most basic cycle of reactions, or rather, not even quite a cycle, it is a linear model.

And further, as we understood more and more how it all works, we realized that this model does not describe all normal human reactions, especially female ones. It turned out that women can have very short this stage of the plateau, for example, and then she quickly ends.She may not have an orgasm at all, and that’s okay too. She can have multiple orgasms in a row, and that’s okay. Men who ejaculate too early also have a short plateau and then orgasm. Someone can skip even a whole piece or start later.

90,000 Types of female orgasm: Difference from male, anorgasmia and the structure of the clitoris

There is a lot of gossip about the female orgasm. If the ancient Chinese believed that a man loses his energy through a seed, then a woman, on the contrary, receives energy.Our society at the same time taboo the topic of sex, but at the same time desire is not lost on the way and there is a collective repression and local “explosions”. Women are charged with complete chastity and preservation of virginity before marriage, and men are more free and look for a way out of their sexual desires. Of course, this leads to all sorts of troubles and troubles.

It often happens that sex ends when the man has reached a climax. His pleasure is in the foreground, and a woman’s orgasm is in the second, third or even tenth plane.This trend in a progressive and empathetic environment is crumbling rather smoothly, but still does not lose its relevance.

It must be remembered that libido (sex drive) does not depend on gender. A random man may have a low libido threshold, while a woman has a high one. Although, on average, we observe that in men it is higher.

The difference between orgasm in women and men

It should be noted that the female orgasm is longer than the male, because it can last up to 23 seconds, when in men it is 2-3 times shorter.Also, women are able to experience multiple orgasms. Multiple orgasms are orgasms more than once in a row. This is explained by the fact that a man needs time (for physiological reasons) to recover from coitus. When a woman’s arousal lasts longer and she can (or she can) be brought to orgasm many times.

In short, it is easier for a woman to come several times in a row, because she does not have to spend energy on renewing a new portion of semen.

Orgasm is an impulse in the brain, as a result of which dopamine is actively produced (a sense of pleasure and pleasure). An orgasm test helps you feel close and attached to the partner with whom you have experienced it.

The female orgasm can be multiple, and if we take into account that it is more elusive and mysterious than the male, it turns into a “search for the lost orgasm.” Studies show that women tend to orgasm more often by adulthood, when sexual and tactile experience accumulates.The main thing is that by this time she is establishing a harmonious connection with the body.

It is necessary to remind that sex is the sphere of the unconscious, where you are more likely representatives of the elements, and not full-fledged personalities. Fears, reflections and tension are not necessary here at all and can even harm.

Does vaginal orgasm exist?

Sexologists, and all and sundry, often divide orgasms into types: clitoral , vaginal and even uterine orgasm.Sigmund Freud told us a lot and is very badly scolded, but he believed that the clitoral orgasm is a sign of infantilism. He stated that you need to finish deeper and in a mature way, that is, in a vaginal way. Also, it has not been proven whether the cherished G-spot actually exists, with the stimulation of which a woman receives the keys to the gates of heaven, as sexologists report.

Also share myotonic orgasm , which is achieved by strong compression of the muscles of the thighs. Achievement of myotonic orgasm occurs quickly enough compared to regular partner sex, where there is no way to squeeze or keep the hips in tension.

Some sexologists, especially of the 20th century, believed that the vaginal orgasm did not exist. Arguing this by the fact that the clitoris is not only the head, but its two large legs and the corpus cavernosum, which cover the internal structure of the vagina. That is, not only the clitoris is stimulated during vaginal sex, which means that the orgasm is always clitoral, not vaginal.

Some studies show that clitoral and vaginal orgasms are different because they involve different areas of the female genital organs.You need to understand that these are rather subjective things that are difficult to measure and prove.

Some report that during vaginal orgasm in a woman there is a contraction of large muscle groups, in contrast to the clitoral. Today, it is generally accepted that the orgasm for women is the same, although its amplitude is different: from short and imperceptible to an orgasm of such force that a woman loses consciousness, shuddering from the blows. Do not forget that many reasons affect the possibility of having an orgasm: the attitude of the partner, the temperature of the room, smells and the ability to turn off the head.

If we turn to antiquity, we can recall that men found the clitoris on a woman’s body, “lost” it, and then found it again. The clitoris developed a special hostility towards itself in the dark times of the Middle Ages and received the title of “Devil’s nipple”, and the carriers of swollen clitoris were mistaken for witches.

Spontaneous orgasm and anorgasmia

Uncontrolled spontaneous orgasm in women occurs without direct stimulation under certain conditions. For example, when passing a difficult test or in other stressful situations.

Anorgasmia is considered to be the absence of orgasm during sex. Moreover, some have its complete absence with any type of stimulation, and some have only partial.

The most common form of anorgasmia in women is the inability to get an orgasm during penetrative sex, but the ability to achieve it during masturbation. Most women reach orgasm more easily with manual stimulation or cunnilingus. For many women, this is the only way to achieve orgasm.

By the way, the concentration of the public on virginity slows down sexual development, spreads unnecessary fears in girls, which can lead to disorders and pain during intercourse, which are of a psychological nature.

Illustrations: Artist Polly Nor

90,000 G-spot enlargement in Es Class Clinics Volgograd at an affordable price

According to statistics, every second woman has problems getting an orgasm.But sex life and full relaxation are important components of women’s health, well-being and mood. And if the clitoral orgasm can somehow still be achieved with the skill and desire of the partner, then the vaginal orgasm for many remains unknown. But it is considered much longer and brighter than the clitoral one. And here point G comes to the rescue.

What is the G-spot and where is it?

Point G is a collection of sensitive nerve cells that are located on the anterior wall of the vagina at a distance of about 5-7 cm from the entrance.Its exact location, shape, fullness and size are individual characteristics of a woman and are determined only empirically. During intercourse, due to excitement and blood flow to the walls of the vagina, the G-spot increases in size, and its sensitivity increases. Under the influence of the partner’s frictions, this zone is stimulated, which leads to the onset of a vaginal orgasm in a woman.

Why doesn’t an orgasm come?

Getting a woman to have a vaginal orgasm does not always depend on the man’s skill and skill.There are many reasons that exclude the onset of discharge during intercourse, for example:

  • Anatomical and physiological features of the structure of the vagina.
  • Congenital malformations of the genital organs.
  • Anatomical features of the structure of the permanent partner’s penis.
  • Changes in muscle tone and vaginal volume after childbirth.
  • Age-related changes and loss of tone of genital tissues.

Ways to solve the problem

In almost all of these cases, you can help a woman.Our doctors perform an increase in the G-spot, which makes it more accessible for stimulation.
As a result of the introduction of hyaluronic acid gel, the area occupied by the G-spot increases, as well as a decrease in the volume of the vagina.
This procedure is especially recommended for those women who have anatomical curvature of the vagina. This allows women who previously did not have orgasm experience or increase its intensity. As a consequence, there are positive changes in the complex sense of satisfaction with their sex life.

Indications for the use of hyaluronic acid in the clitoris and G-spot:

  • decreased libido;
  • absence or decrease in the severity of vaginal orgasm;
  • reduced clitoris size;
  • age-related changes in the genital area;
  • decreased pelvic muscle tone.

How is the procedure going?

The manipulation is carried out on an outpatient basis in 20-30 minutes. Due to the fact that hyaluronic acid is a natural component and is part of the body’s tissues, preparations based on it do not cause side effects.Before the procedure, you must visit a gynecologist and take a smear from the vagina to determine the microflora.


  • The gynecologist determines the location of point G.
  • Before the hyaluronic acid gel is injected, the injection site is anesthetized with a local anesthetic.
  • The gel is injected directly under the erogenous zone, which adds volume and fullness to it, narrows the vagina.
  • A woman can immediately return to her usual life.Sexual activity can be resumed within 2-3 days.

The procedure is practically painless, does not require special rehabilitation and prolonged sexual abstinence.

At a free consultation on this issue, the gynecologist will answer all your questions and inform you about the cost of increasing the point G.


Like any other medical manipulation, this procedure has a number of limitations that must be discussed with your doctor:

  • Oncological processes of the reproductive system.
  • Inflammatory and infectious diseases of the genital organs.
  • Diseases of the blood, pathology of the coagulation system.
  • General diseases: diabetes mellitus, autoimmune systemic diseases, etc.
  • Any disease in the acute stage.
  • Pregnancy and breastfeeding.
  • Taking certain medications.
  • Allergy to hyaluronic acid preparations.
  • Previously ineffective correction of this zone.
  • Minor age.

You can learn more about the correction procedure at a consultation at the Es Klass Clinic Volgograd. You can make an appointment online or by phone.