What Do Our Nightmares Mean?

Sleep is supposed to be restful; yet when we’re having a nightmare, it’s anything but. Whether we’re being terrorized by a fictional monster (that girl from The Ring, anyone?) or grieving a dreamed loss, nightmares steal our energy away rather than restoring it. So why do we have nightmares? And how can we reduce their severity or frequency?

What are nightmares?

Psychology Today defines nightmares as dreams that evoke “fear, anxiety, or sadness.” They occur during the “rapid eye movement” (REM) stage of sleep, often later in the night, and tend to awaken the sleeper; common themes include falling, losing one’s teeth, and being unprepared for an exam.

For 1 percent of the population, nightmares occur so frequently and are so debilitating that one may be diagnosed with nightmare disorder, the criteria for which includes:

• Repeatedly awakening with detailed recollection of frightening dreams about threats to survival, security, or physical integrity;
• Being oriented and alert upon awakening;
• Experiencing impairment of important areas of functioning;
• Having no general medical conditions, medications, or substance use patterns that would cause these symptoms.

While you may not be dealing with a full-fledged nightmare disorder, unpleasant dreams can still give you plenty of grief and leave you feeling exhausted. It’s understandable that you would want to figure out what might be causing your nightmares so that you can treat the issue.

What Do Our Nightmares Mean?

According to clinician Jacky Casumbal, “Dreams are our brain’s way of organizing events of the day, memories, and images into vivid, symbolic, and nonsensical storylines.” Nightmares in particular are “dreams that are often connected to unresolved anxiety and trauma that our brain has not fully worked through.”

Jacky Casumbal, LICSW

Indeed, studies suggest that nightmares are often linked to unmet psychological needs and/or frustration with life experiences. Yet those links aren’t always easy to make—except in cases of trauma (discussed below), our nightmares tend to reflect our troubles through metaphor rather than literal representation. For example, a person who is dealing with a stressful move might not dream of the move itself, but about falling off the edge of a cliff or running late to an important event. Likewise, two people may experience similar nightmares (about, say, finding themselves naked in a public space) but for wildly different reasons. These variations can make it difficult to find a single, clear “meaning” behind our dreams.

Yet that hasn’t stopped people from trying. Several sources have theorized about the meanings of certain, common nightmares, and some of their conclusions are easy to get on board with. We can all understand why many researchers believe that dreams about being chased are directly linked to experiences of anxiety, or that dreams about being in an out-of-control vehicle reflect a lack of control in one’s life. Yet no two people’s minds or experiences are the same, so the best way to figure out why you keep dreaming about, say, being attacked by birds or getting lost in a maze, is to think it through yourself.

Try asking yourself the following questions:

1. What am I feeling in this dream, and have I ever felt that way before? Ex. Fear, shame, hopelessness, confusion…
2. What are some recurring themes or images in this and my other dreams? Ex. Being betrayed, not being able to communicate, the presence of a specific person…
3. Did anything out of the ordinary happen before I slept? What was I focused on during the day? Challenges at work, a fight with a friend, medical difficulties…
4. Is there a certain day or time when I tend to have these dreams? Tuesdays after my weekly call home, at the beginning of my menstrual cycle, during the holidays, after therapy…

If you work with a therapist, they can help you parse through any details of your nightmares. Together, you may pick up on recurring patterns in the content or timing of your bad dreams. Outside of therapy, you can try to keep track of recurring themes in a dream journal. Either way, you’re certain to make some new and interesting observations about how your emotions influence your thoughts, and vice versa.

How can we reduce our nightmares?

There’s no cure-all solution for bad dreams, but clinicians have developed exercises to reduce their frequency and severity.

When it comes to getting relief from nightmares, Jacky recommends utilizing calming strategies like “deep, diaphragmatic breathing,” which stimulates the vagus nerve (which is associated with our parasympathetic nervous system, or our ‘calming’ system). “One helpful breathing technique that I use often with clients is inhaling for 4 counts, holding that breath for 7 counts, and then exhaling for 8 counts. You then repeat this activity two more times.” This technique can be particularly helpful with practiced immediately before going to bed.

Other clinicians recommend Image Rehearsal Therapy (IRT), a cognitive therapy that involves writing down the contents of one’s nightmare and then rewriting the ending in a positive light. For example, someone who dreams of being chased may write themselves finally reaching freedom, or discovering that the person “chasing” them was a friend who was actually trying to help them. The individual would then rehearse this narrative before bed with the aim of displacing the unwanted, negative ending. Studies suggest that this form of therapy can be effective in reducing both nightmare frequency and the degree of distress it causes.

Then there’s Progressive Deep Muscle Relaxation (PDMR), which you can practice immediately before going to bed. PDMR involves tensing and then relaxing one part of your body at a time, typically starting at the top (your scalp) and ending at the bottom (your toes). Studies indicate that as many as 80 percent of those who practice PMDR experience nightmare reduction within 25 weeks.

There are a variety of additional options, as diverse as the content of our nightmares themselves—you may find that you prefer meditation, keeping fresh lavender by your bed, or just generally practicing good sleep hygiene (not using caffeine or electronics before bed, keeping your bedtime consistent, etc). We encourage you to explore which method is best for you.

How Are Nightmares Connected to Trauma?

It’s worth noting, especially for those of us coping with trauma, that sometimes our nightmares are about more than just daily stressors. Those who’ve experienced trauma often deal with distressing and recurrent nightmares that interfere with their health and functioning.

A study from the University of Pittsburgh Medical School found that up to 80 percent of people experiencing PTSD cope with “frequent nightmares,” as opposed to 5 percent of the general population. Unlike our more metaphorical, stress-related nightmares, traumatic nightmares often feature elements “similar” to those of the trauma itself. For example, someone who has experienced a natural disaster might dream of high winds, flames, or being trapped in a flooding space. At times, traumatic nightmares can even take the form of a “replay” of the traumatic event, making us feel as though we’re reliving the experience or watching it on television.

As one might expect, the most effective form of treatment for traumatic nightmares is one that targets trauma and/or PTSD directly. This typically involves working with a trauma-informed therapist who has extensive experience working with nightmares and other common post-traumatic responses such as trouble sleeping, flashbacks, and hyperawareness. Your therapist can also work with you around a concept called the “window of tolerance,” which Jacky describes as “the state you’re in when you’re cool, calm, and collected,” not in the midst of debilitating post-traumatic symptoms.

“When you are outside the window of tolerance,” as many people experiencing post-traumatic symptoms are, “you are either hyperaroused (anxious, restless, overwhelmed, etc.) or hypoaroused (depressed, numb, lacking energy, etc.). A trauma-informed therapist can gently work with you to help you recognize when you are outside your window of tolerance and implement calming strategies in order to get you back into it.” These calming strategies can soothe symptoms, leading to “more restful sleep.”

For any information about finding a trauma-informed therapist, what to expect in post-traumatic treatment, or the different treatment avenues you can take, feel free to contact us any time at [email protected].

What do you constantly find yourself dreaming about? Have you noticed any patterns? As always, we love to hear from you.  

Decode Your Nightmares

We’ve all had nightmares. In fact, you can probably still remember your worst bad dream.

If you or a loved one suffers from nightmares, or if you’re just curious about things that go bump in the night, here is some basic information about nightmares. You’ll find out where they come from, what they mean and how to stop them.

What is a nightmare?

Nightmares, or bad dreams, are a type of dream that causes you to feel anxiety, fear or terror.

Typically, a person will wake up during or just after having a nightmare and he or she will be able to remember all or part of the bad dream clearly.

Both nightmares and dreams occur during the REM (rapid eye movement) cycle of sleep. People spend about 2 hours dreaming every night. Nightmares usually occur in the latter part of the REM cycle.

Sometimes, nightmares can be more than just a bad dream.

Nightmare disorder is a condition in which people experience chronic, intense nightmares over a prolonged period of time. The nightmares are so intense that they cause the person great distress and may interfere with the subject’s work or social life.

Nightmares can also be a symptom of post-traumatic stress disorder.

Examples of physical trauma include surgery, a car accident or a history of physical abuse.

Emotional trauma can include the loss of a loved one, assault, neglect, sexual or emotional abuse.

There have been many reported cases of people who repress memories of childhood abuse. They have no recollection of the abuse, but after many years, they begin to have nightmares. When they seek counseling because of the nightmares, their repressed memories start to come to the surface.

War veterans’ nightmares can also be attributed to post-traumatic stress disorder.

Similarly, stress and anxiety are a common cause of bad dreams.

More than half of all nightmares occur around the time of a major life event, such as starting at a new school, changing careers or having a child.

Other common causes of nightmares are entirely physical. They are simply part of the body’s response to certain physiological conditions, such as:

* Fever

* Side effect or adverse reaction to a medication

* Alcohol or drug withdrawal

* Breathing disorder during sleep (such as sleep apnea)

Nightmares can be the result of a reaction to a new medication.

If you recently began having nightmares and you just started taking some kind of medication, contact your doctor.

Your doctor may be able to prescribe a different, but equally effective medicine that won’t cause such unwanted side effects. You should also talk to your doctor if you experience bad dreams more than once a week or if they keep you from getting adequate sleep for a prolonged period of time.

You may need to get a physical, neurological or psychological exam to determine the underlying cause.

If you experience especially intense or recurring nightmares, you may benefit by talking about it with a counselor or psychologist.

Sometimes just talking through your nightmares can be enough to dispel them. In other cases, bad dreams could be a subconscious manifestation of some emotional or psychological problem that you need to sort out.

We know so much about the human body, yet nightmares and dreams continue to remain a mystery. Perhaps that is why they hold such a power over us. You may believe that nightmares are a side effect of normal physiological processes, a message from a higher power or your subconscious mind’s way of communicating with you.

Whatever the case, just know that your nightmares are only as powerful as you make them.

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What your dreams say: 10 typical nightmares and their meaning

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Why do we have nightmares at all? Some we hardly remember, while others wake us up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat. Frequent nightmares indicate overwork, strong emotional stress and exhaustion of the nervous system. Sometimes nightmares occur during depression, so your subconscious mind releases all the feelings and emotions accumulated during the day through dreams.

Let’s look at the most common stories and tell you what they can mean.

RUNNING FROM THE PURSUANT

If someone is chasing you, you probably regret something you didn’t do or want to run away from problems, leaving your own fears behind. Remember, did you make promises to someone that you forgot about? If you fix everything, you will definitely not see such dreams in the near future.

FEELING OF PARALYZING FEAR, IMPOSSIBILITY TO ESCAPE

If you dream like this, you probably feel depressed. It seems to you that you are in a situation from which there is no way out. And no matter what decision you make, the problem will still not be solved. Try asking your family or friends for advice – they may be able to tell you what to do.

DISASTER, END OF THE WORLD, OR ALIEN INVASION

Significant changes are about to take place in your life. Morally, you are not yet ready for them, so you experience doubts, uncertainty and fear of the unknown. If you are watching the end of the world from the side, then this is a harbinger of peace and prosperity. However, if you suffered from cataclysms or died, then a dream can warn of illness, failure in school or work, or material losses.

TOOTH LOSS

Such a dream is very common and usually means a loss of control over the situation. You feel like you don’t have the strength to deal with what’s going on in your life. Or you are too afraid of condemnation from the outside. We have to work hard in order to be able to overcome difficulties and with honor withstand the pressure of gossip, troubles and losses.

LATE TO A VERY IMPORTANT EVENT

If you had such a dream, take time to rest! Your brain is trying to tell you are emotionally overwhelmed. Too many events are happening around, and you just do not have time to react to them. You are trying to adapt to them, but so far it is not very successful. So you dream that you are always late for something.

FREE FALL

If you fall from a height, you are most likely confused and don’t know what you want. It may also indicate that you have failed and now you cannot cope with your problems, you are afraid to stumble again. Such a dream shows that you violated your own principles under the influence of another person and began to move in the wrong direction.

APPEARING NAKED IN PUBLIC

Such a dream is usually associated with feelings of embarrassment or shame. Perhaps you are nervous about the upcoming event and believe that you will definitely fail in front of everyone. You just lack confidence. Do not wind yourself up in vain, everything will be fine 🙂

WAVES BREAKING ON ROCKS OR SWIMMING

Do you feel that you are drowning? It means that you are overloaded. Too much has been thrown at you right now. And you, exhausting yourself, are trying in every possible way to cope with everything at the same time. Remember that stress is very dangerous for the body – if you have such dreams, then it is better to postpone business and relax a bit.

DRIVING

If you are driving in a dream, it means that you are struggling to take control of the situation, just like driving a car. Or take responsibility for some action. And if you are a passenger, then you should take a closer look at who is sitting next to you. Usually these are the people you care about the most.

LOSS OF SOMETHING VERY IMPORTANT

Most likely, you feel that you pay little attention to important aspects of your life, such as rest or self-care. Consider such a dream as a reminder that it’s time to remember your beloved. It can also mean the loss of one’s own “I”. Perhaps you should rethink your life and decide what is really important to you.

Nightmares are not always bad. But if you have a terrible dream, then something inside does not give you rest. According to psychologists, if the nightmare is interpreted correctly, it will allow us to see some truth about us that we vaguely feel, but do not want or cannot accept.

It may even happen that it is in a nightmare that your brain finds a solution to some problem. And then it only remains to thank the bad dream for help.

Elizaveta Tereshkova

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• dream

The 8 most common nightmares: what they mean

Have you ever had the same dream every time during times of great stress? Maybe you find yourself naked in a meeting or trying to run away from a faceless monster? Oddly enough, we all see approximately the same dreams when we are scared, sad or painful. Here’s what they mean.

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Psychology of dreams

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Failed Escape

Michael Lennox, psychologist and dream interpreter and author of Llewellyn’s Little Book of Dreams, calls this type of dream “101 stress dreams. ” Actually, this dream (when you are running from someone or something, but you feel that “it” is catching up, that the monster is about to overtake you) is the embodiment of fear and anxiety.

Kelly Bulkley, dream researcher and author of An Introduction to the Psychology of Dreaming, says she would first ask the person who is having this dream if there is something in their life that which feels inevitable. Maybe a person feels vulnerable in some kind of conflict. Dreams often use “dramatic metaphors” for emotions that are difficult to put into words.

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Simply put, perhaps if you are running away from something in a dream, some situation in your life seems inevitable to you in the truest sense of the word.

Being naked in public

Lennox believes that dreams of being naked in public are the “perfect symbolic expression” of the so-called impostor syndrome. Many people are afraid that their colleagues, for example, will “figure out” that they are in fact completely incompetent. Of course, this unprofessionalism sits only in a person’s head, it does not reflect his real knowledge in any way.

If you dream that you suddenly appear naked in the boss’s office, where a board meeting is in full swing, this can mean something like this: “They will see who I really am and laugh at me.” It is your fear speaking in you.

Not preparing for an exam

Even many decades later, it is not uncommon for people to have a dream where they are called to a blackboard or given an exam paper, only to find that they do not even understand the assignments. Panic sets in, you want to run away, but you are pinned to the spot by the stern gaze of the teacher.

Lennos believes that such dreams are associated with high levels of anxiety at work. High school or university are “the first places where we learn about responsibility. A dream may indicate that you are faced with excessive pressure at work.

Lose all your teeth

In a dream, you first feel discomfort in your mouth, and then your teeth begin to crumble – one after another or simultaneously, like sand. In a dream, you usually experience horror mixed with disgust.

“Tooth loss,” says Lennox, “speaks of insecurity.” Teeth have several functions: obviously, they allow us to eat, but, apart from that, they also make us smile sincerely.

By losing teeth, we are symbolically deprived of the opportunity to feed ourselves, take care of ourselves, and express joy and happiness. It is also possible that this dream speaks of an inability to express one’s own opinion, of symbolic dumbness.

Fall

This dream, according to Kelly Bulkley, speaks of uncertainty when you do not literally feel supported. Perhaps something in your life that you used to perceive as something stable and reliable suddenly ceased to be so.

Falling is uncontrolled movement. It is likely that along with the loss of support, you feel that you have lost control over your life, that the development of events does not depend on you in any way.

Death of a loved one

One of the most terrible dreams is when your loved one dies and you are left completely alone, devastated by his death. Often these dreams are very detailed and vivid: you clearly see the funeral, flowers and his crying mother. Sometimes you wake up in a cold sweat. But in fact, death in a dream is just a symbol of change, says Lennox.

When someone dies in your dream, this may indicate a change in your attitude towards the person. Not necessarily in a negative direction, but this change worries you to some extent.

Missing a train or plane

In these dreams we run to the train station or airport and see that our ship has already left. We experience a powerful surge of disappointment and despair. “In the context of work, missing a train or plane is most like overdue deadlines.”

Moreover, a person who has such dreams tends to exaggerate the drama of the situation. Being an hour late with a report to the boss is still not the same thing as being late for an international flight.

Driving

This scenario has many variations, but one thing is common: in these dreams you are driving.